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When you were on the bottom of the high school social ladder, certain things just didn’t happen in your life. For example, one of the best players on the lacrosse team asking to speak with you and bringing along the popular girl you’ve had a crush on basically forever.
Add in a giant, dark shadow with glowing green eyes appearing out of the bushes and hissing his name, Scott McCall grabbing his wrist, yelling at him to run, and sprinting towards the parking lot, and Stiles was pretty sure he was dreaming.
His subconscious was very, very weird.
“How did it get here so fast?” Lydia called to Scott, running just behind him and Stiles. Scott made a sound that almost sounded like a growl.
“I don’t think it really matters, do you?”
“It matters when it’s trying to attack us at school!” They rounded the corner. Stiles impressed himself by managing not to trip and fall on his face. Another girl – Malia, the one who had transferred not that long ago, Stiles remembered – was standing there and looked visibly surprised to see them. Stiles didn’t blame her. He was also very surprised about everything happening.
“What’s got you in a rush?” She asked, her eyes flicking between them.
“Shadow Stalker,” Lydia said shortly, as if that meant something. Malia’s eyes widened. For just an instant, Stiles could have sworn they flashed a bright blue. He blinked and the color was gone.
“Right,” she said. “What’s the plan?” Stiles stared at her. Why couldn’t his dreams involve celebrities instead? If his brain was going to make up weird stories while he was asleep, the least it could do was give him an all-star cast. Scott’s voice interrupted his thoughts.
“If we can get out of range, we should have a little bit of time. We need to get off school grounds.” Stiles subtly tried to reclaim his wrist. It didn’t work. It felt like an iron cuff around his wrist, and as a subtle pain flared through his wrist Stiles swallowed back an uneasy feeling. That had felt uncomfortably real. Scott looked back at him and Stiles resisted the urge to shrink away from him. “You drove the Jeep today, right?” Stiles blinked at him.
“Why do you know-”
“There’s no time, Stiles! Yes or no?”
“Yes,” Stiles said without thinking. “But-” Lydia stepped forward and put a hand on his shoulder. He looked at her, too many words pressing against each other to have anything coherent come out of his mouth. Lydia’s face was surprisingly sympathetic.
“I know this is confusing,” she said, “but we really don’t have time to explain right now. If you can help us get to safety, I promise that we’ll explain everything.” Stiles looked back at Scott, who nodded once as soon as their eyes met. Malia had her arms crossed and didn’t look happy, but she nodded too when Stiles looked at her. He swallowed back all the questions crowded in his throat and nodded back, trying to look more confident than he felt. If this was somehow reality, there wasn’t much else he could do.
“Okay,” he said. “But this had better be good.”
Somehow on the way to the car, they managed to pick up the even newer transfer student. Stiles didn’t know why he was surprised to see Kira at this point. It was as if the universe had taken his thought that the group was already weird enough as a challenge. Kira had come along without asking hardly any questions, though she had given Stiles a look of bewilderment and was now whispering with Lydia in the backseat as Stiles drove them all towards the woods. He wasn’t sure why that was where they were going. Scott was quiet in the passenger seat next to him, staring out the window as if he were angry with it.
When the car came to a stop in a clearing, Stiles just sat behind the wheel. He wasn’t sure what to do. Maybe if all these people got out of the car before him, he could just drive off? The only problem was that he had definitely seen whatever that weird shadow was, and he didn’t have an explanation for it. He had a brief moment of picturing that thing showing up in his room at night and shuddered.
“Are you just going to sit there?” He jumped slightly and turned to see Malia in the backseat looking at him, arms folded. Belatedly, he realized that everyone else had already gotten out of the car.
“I’m trying to figure out what the heck is going on,” he snapped. “Things were normal about an hour ago, okay?” Malia snorted.
“Don’t hurt yourself.” Stiles bristled.
“Listen, just because you know what’s going on-”
“I’m not the person to explain it,” she interrupted. “Scott’s the one who has to do that, whether he likes it or not.” She gave him a little smile, her arms uncrossing as she leaned forward. “Things are a lot less normal than you think, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing.” She got out of the car before he could say anything else. Stiles turned back to his steering wheel, glaring at it as if it had the answers.
“As if I hadn’t already realized that none of this is normal,” he muttered. He closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. A tiny part of him in the back of his mind had to admit that he was curious about whatever this was. It didn’t seem safe. By all rights he should be driving out of here as fast as he possibly could. He could skip school tomorrow and wait this out, and these people would move on to something else.
With a loud sigh, Stiles opened his eyes and got out of the car.
The others were waiting for him outside, with the exception of Kira. Stiles glanced around without seeing her anywhere and for a wild moment wondered if she’d been murdered without him noticing.
“Kira’s checking the perimeter,” Lydia said. Stiles looked at her to see if she was joking. Her face was as serious as he’d ever seen it.
“Checking the perimeter is not a normal thing for high schoolers to randomly do in the woods. You know that, right?” Lydia shrugged and didn’t answer. She and Malia both looked at Scott expectantly. Stiles, lacking anything better to do, looked at him too. Scott looked as if he wanted to be anywhere other than here.
“You’re going to have to do this eventually,” Lydia said softly. Scott’s shoulders tensed, but he looked up from where he was staring at his feet to glance at Stiles. He took a deep breath.
“I know this is confusing,” he said carefully.
“To put it mildly,” Stiles muttered. Scott ignored him.
“That thing you saw at the school is called a Shadow Stalker. We don’t know why, but it’s after you. That’s why we wanted to talk to you after school, so we could protect you from it.” Stiles blinked.
“Wait, what? It’s after me? Why?” Scott fiddled with the zipper on his jacket, back to not meeting Stiles’ eyes. Lydia sighed.
“This is ridiculous.” She looked straight at Stiles. “Listen. The reality is, lots of things like that exist. Including werewolves.” She pointed to Scott. Stiles looked from her finger to Scott and back again.
“He’s a-”
“Why else would I be pointing at him? Yes, he’s a werewolf. He – all of us, really – keep Beacon Hills safe from things like the Shadow Stalker. That’s why we were trying to warn you.” Stiles took a moment to process this. The information floated on top of his thoughts like oil in water, absolutely refusing to incorporate with his idea of reality.
“So you’re like. Weird werewolf super heroes?” He glanced around at all of them. “I thought the goal of this was to make me feel less confused.”
“I don’t see what part of that was confusing,” Malia said. Stiles held up a hand before anyone could say anything else.
“Okay, wait. You still haven’t explained why this shadow demon thing-”
“Shadow Stalker,” Lydia filled in helpfully.
“Whatever. Why is it after me? I don’t have anything to do with your weird Justice League thing here! Shouldn’t it be after one of you?” The air in the clearing grew very still. Stiles got the distinct feeling that he had said something wrong. Lydia was back to glaring at Scott. Eventually, Scott deflated and reached into his pocket, pulling his phone out. He scrolled through it for a moment before holding it out. Stiles squinted at the screen, then felt his eyes widen.
He was looking at a picture of himself, but it wasn’t a picture that he remembered ever being taken. He was standing next to Scott. They were both wearing lacrosse uniforms and had an arm thrown over each other’s shoulders. The Stiles in the picture was grinning, clearly happy. Stiles felt a chill go down his spine. It was like he was looking into an alternate reality.
“How-”
“You used to be involved.” Stiles looked up to see Scott looking at him. His eyes were full of an emotion that Stiles didn’t know how to read. For once, he couldn’t think of anything to say. “You were involved because you were my best friend,” Scott said, his voice shaking slightly. “Your memories were taken away. That’s why you don’t remember.”
“My memories?” Stiles repeated stupidly, not knowing what else to say. “That’s possible?”
“If the Shadow Stalker thinks you’re still involved with us, it makes a lot of sense that it would be after you,” Lydia said quietly, picking up the conversation as Scott pulled his phone back. “But since you don’t remember anything, you don’t have any defenses against it.”
“Hang on, hang on.” Stiles took a step back, his hands coming up in front of him as the urge to run away came back full force. “Memories can’t just get taken away. There’s no way I wouldn’t remember any of this.”
“I know this is a lot to take in,” Scott said. “Believe me, if we had a choice, we wouldn’t be telling you this at all. We just want to keep you safe.” Stiles heard what he wasn’t saying – he wasn’t going to give Stiles any more information about his supposed memories. He shook his head. He shouldn’t even be considering the fact that they were telling the truth. Every scrap of logic inside of him said that they had to be lying.
His eyes fell on his hands and he counted his fingers quickly, hoping against hope that there would be an extra one so that he could prove this was a dream and wake up already. His hands drooped when he counted twice and still came up with ten. His mind presented him with the image of the Shadow Stalker moving towards him and he winced. That had definitely been real. If that was real, who was to say that this wasn’t real too? He looked up to see the others watching him quietly. He felt smaller than he ever had before.
“Werewolves?” The plaintive word escaped him without his permission. Malia grinned at him in a way that he could only describe as feral, and suddenly her eyes were glowing a bright blue. Stiles yelped and took a step back, almost tripping over a rock. Lydia sighed.
“Malia, scaring him isn’t the goal. Besides, you’re a werecoyote, not a werewolf.”
“Close enough.” Malia, clearly unrepentant, looked expectantly at Scott. He closed his eyes for a moment, and when he opened them again, they were glowing red. Stiles swallowed hard as Scott looked at him.
“I know it’s a lot,” he said, and there was definitely a growl in his voice that hadn’t been there before. “We’re not lying to you, Stiles.”
“I think it would be a lot easier if you were,” he said weakly. Somewhat to his relief, Kira came out of the trees. Everyone looked at her, taking the pressure off Stiles for a moment. He also noted that everyone’s eyes were back to normal, not glowing colors.
“Things looked safe enough out there. I didn’t see any signs of anything to worry about.” Kira smiled. “Honestly, this isn’t a bad place to make a stand, if that’s our plan.” Stiles didn’t want to know what taking a stand was going to look like. With how little he’d liked everything else about this, he had a feeling that he was going to enjoy a potential stand even less.
“I think we’re going to have to,” Lydia said. Scott nodded. Stiles was only somewhat comforted to see that he didn’t look happy about the idea either.
“We’re going to need a strategy,” he said. Stiles decided that he had heard enough and wandered away from the group. He looked out into the trees, his thoughts whirling. He tried to come up with a reason why they would be lying to him. This could be an elaborate prank, but unless they were on some kind of prank show he couldn’t imagine why. It wasn’t like he was popular enough for an elaborate prank on him to be funny to anyone else. Every time he thought about the demon – Shadow Stalker – he couldn’t imagine it as being anything other than real. Did that make everything real? He massaged his forehead, wishing there was an easy answer. If he really had lost memories, there had to be a way to access them, right?
He looked back over at the group. Scott was still talking to the others, but as he watched Kira glanced over her shoulder at him. She bit her lip, turned back to Scott, and then looked back at Stiles again barely ten seconds later. Her shoulders tensed and she walked away from the huddle to where Stiles was standing, looking determined. He stared at her.
“Aren’t you supposed to be over there?” He said, jerking his head towards the rest of the group. “Not that I have any idea what they’re up to.”
“I know,” Kira said. “I mean, that you don’t know. I wasn’t doing the best job of listening, so I don’t really know either. I’ll ask Malia later. Or Lydia. She’s probably the better choice.” She clamped her lips together. Stiles blinked.
“I thought I was the world champion when it came to word vomit.” Kira flushed.
“Sorry, it’s just, I’m kind of nervous.” Stiles snorted.
“Yeah, well, for most of the day I thought the world was normal, so welcome to the club.” Kira seemed to deflate at that, her right hand coming up to squeeze her other wrist as she looked away from him.
“Yeah, I know that feeling,” she said. “Not that it happened to me as recently as today, but…” she trailed off and shook her head, looking back up at him. “Look, that’s not why I came over here. I wanted to apologize to you.”
“To me?” Kira nodded.
“The whole thing with your memories happened because of my mom, and Scott’s been saying that it’s not my fault but I just feel like someone should apologize because what happened to you wasn’t fair. And it might as well be me.” Stiles looked over at where Scott appeared to still be deep in conversation with Malia and Lydia, sensing an opportunity. Scott didn’t seem to have noticed that Kira had come over, or if he had he wasn’t paying attention to them. There was no way of knowing how long that would last, so Stiles turned back to Kira and lowered his voice.
“What exactly did happen with my memories?” Kira looked surprised.
“No one’s told you yet?” Stiles shook his head.
“Things have been pretty busy,” he pointed out. “What with random monsters showing up and all.” To his relief, Kira nodded.
“Well, it’s a long story, but…” Kira tilted her head, considering. “Okay. The basics are, you were possessed by an evil spirit for a while. Everyone was looking for a way to get rid of it, because it was hurting people, and my mom – she’s a kitsune I guess, and she had originally let the spirit out, so she knew more about it – anyway, she offered to pull it out of you, but it wouldn’t go without taking something, and what it ended up taking was your memories. Well, not all of them obviously, but the part about all of us.” She looked at him, biting her lip. “Sorry, that left a lot out, didn’t it?” Stiles shook his head, grasping on to the main part of what she’d said. Some kind of evil spirit – so he’d been possessed? – and then getting rid of it had messed with his head. He could deal with everything else she’d said later.
“That’s more than I had before.” He saw Scott look over at them out of the corner of his eye and quickly smiled at Kira. “It doesn’t sound to me like you really have anything to apologize for, but thanks for thinking of it.” Kira smiled back at him, looking relieved.
“I’m just glad that you’re here, even if you don’t remember any of this. Scott’s been pretty down without you.” She turned as Lydia started coming over to them. “Oh, are you guys done?”
“Yeah. You’re with us, Kira. We’re going to keep an eye out on the perimeter. Stiles, you’re staying here with Scott.” Kira nodded. Stiles blinked.
“Wait, what? Why am I staying here?” Lydia folded her arms.
“Do you have any idea what we’re likely to run into out there?”
“I saw it at the school!”
“And what exactly would you do if you ran into it out here?” Stiles opened his mouth, then closed it again. He didn’t really have a good answer for that. Lydia’s face softened slightly. “Look, Stiles. I know that you can handle yourself, but right now the Shadow Stalker is after you. We’re all going to feel better if you’re in a place where we can keep you safe.” Kira whipped her belt off. Stiles stared as it solidified into a sword. Kira walked over to Scott as if this was a perfectly normal thing for her to have done.
“Was that-” He shook his head. “I already decided this isn’t a dream, didn’t I?”
“You did. You can count your fingers again if you want.” Lydia shrugged when he looked back at her. “You get used to it after a while.” She reached out and squeezed his arm. “Stay safe, all right?” She walked over to join the others, and after a quick consultation she, Malia, and Kira headed out into the trees. Stiles stumbled back and sat down hard on a rock. Scott was almost instantly at his side, looking concerned.
“Stiles? Are you okay?” Stiles laughed, feeling slightly hysterical.
“No, it’s pretty normal for girls to just pull swords out of nowhere and march into the woods to hunt monsters made out of shadows, right?” He lowered his head into his hands. “I think I’m going to throw up.”
“Wait, right now? Do you have a bag or something in the Jeep?” Scott sounded genuinely concerned, enough so that it pulled Stiles out of his own panic. He peeked through his fingers to see Scott looking back towards the Jeep, clearly torn between going to look for a bag and staying with Stiles.
“Are you always like this?” Scott looked back at him.
“Like what?” He asked. Stiles lowered his hands, using one to prop his chin on instead, considering Scott. He’d never actually thought much about him, at least not that he could remember. He’d had in mind that Scott must be like all the other jocks he didn’t get along with. Even without having werewolves and demons thrown at him he wasn’t sure what to make of the reality. Scott looked at him uncertainly. “Are you still going to throw up?”
“Anything’s possible,” Stiles said absently. He laid back over the rock instead, staring up at the sky. If he tried hard enough, he could almost imagine that he was just in the forest on a normal day. Because he definitely spent time in the forest by himself after school on a normal day instead of heading home to get dinner ready for his dad, and… He sat bolt upright as the end of that thought caught up with him. Scott looked visibly startled.
“What? Did you hear something?” He looked around as if something was going to burst out of the trees around them at any moment. Stiles vaguely wondered if werewolves could hear things that humans couldn’t. Or was that just when they were wolves? They could turn into wolves, right? He shook his head to get himself back on track.
“My dad,” he said before another distraction could let the thought escape. Scott smacked his forehead.
“I can’t believe I didn’t think of that earlier. You’re right, you should call him.” Stiles was already pulling his phone out of his pocket. He paused, staring at the screen for a moment as a new thought pushed its way to the front of his mind. If he and Scott had been friends, why didn’t he have any pictures of the two of them together? Why was it only Scott and his group who had any evidence? Frowning, he unlocked the phone and was about to open his photos when Scott came back over to perch on the rock next to him.
“You don’t have to look so worried,” he said. “Your dad knows.” Stiles blinked, his mind taking a minute to move from pictures back to the topic of his dad.
“Wait, he knows about werewolves and stuff? Why? That doesn’t seem like the kind of thing I’d tell him.” That startled a laugh out of Scott.
“We didn’t tell him, not at first anyway. He ended up involved in some things, it was pretty complicated, but he found out.” Stiles tried and failed to imagine how that had gone. Scott was smiling, so it must not have been the worst thing. He wrinkled his nose and turned back to his phone. Without more details, he couldn’t imagine how just about anything that had apparently happened in his life had gone.
“Stiles? Where are you?” His dad’s voice, answering after the phone had barely rung, had a definite edge of panic to it. Stiles winced. He should have gotten ahold of him earlier.
“Hey dad. I’m fine, there’s just…” He tried to figure out what to say and failed. “Some stuff came up?”
“Some stuff.” His dad sighed. “Stiles, I’m sure you could be less specific if you wanted to, but it would be a bit of a challenge even for you.” Stiles rubbed his forehead, leaning back to look back up at the sky.
“Would you believe me if I said it’s complicated and I don’t even know where to start?” His dad was silent for long enough that Stiles was starting to wonder if they’d gotten disconnected. When he spoke again, his voice was oddly emotionless.
“Who are you with right now?” Stiles opened his mouth, then closed it again. He hadn’t heard his dad sound like this before. It was enough to make him pause. Scott, who at this point he had almost forgotten was next to him, stood up with a sigh and held out his hand.
“Let me talk to him.” Stiles stared at him. He heard a sharp intake of breath through the phone and had to wonder if his dad had heard Scott’s voice. He didn’t know what else to do. He held the phone out to Scott without another word. Scott closed his eyes briefly as he put the phone to his ear. “It’s Scott,” he said. He paused, listening to whatever Stiles’ dad was saying, then sighed and turned to walk towards the Jeep. “Yeah, I know. I’m sorry.” Stiles wasn’t sure if he purposefully lowered his voice or if he was just far enough away to make eavesdropping impossible. Either way, it was frustrating. He tried imagining what on earth the two were talking about. Was his dad going to be mad? Scott had said that he knew, but not really what he thought about the whole thing. Whatever the whole thing was.
The conversation ended up being much shorter than Stiles would have guessed when it started. Scott had ended up leaning against the hood of the Jeep, his eyes looking down as the sun started to set. When he lowered the phone, Stiles couldn’t read the expression on his face.
“So. You told him what’s going on?” He said after the silence had gone on long enough to feel awkward. Scott nodded. Stiles cast around for something else to say. “Uh. Was he mad?”
“Not really.” Scott sighed, massaging his forehead. “Sorry. You can have your phone back.” He held it out. Stiles stood up, feeling like he was missing yet another huge piece of what was happening. He was starting to get sick of that feeling, but it wasn’t like there was much he could do about it. He looked up at the sky, willing himself to absorb some of the calm of the clouds floating in the pink sky above them before walking over to where Scott was and taking the phone. He just stood there for a moment, wondering what he could say to stop Scott from looking like the world had ended.
“Kira explained what happened. With my memories.” Scott looked up at that, his eyes wide. Stiles mentally sighed. Whatever the right thing had been, that clearly hadn’t been it.
“She wasn’t supposed to tell you.”
“Well, it’s a bit late for that.” Stiles shrugged. “I’m glad she did, for what it’s worth. Even if it still doesn’t make any of this make sense.” He leaned on the hood of the Jeep next to Scott and tried for a smile. “It might make this whole situation less freaky if I was him. Past me, I mean.” Scott snorted at that.
“Trust me, it doesn’t ever get less freaky.” He looked away for a moment, his eyes on the sky above them. When he spoke again, he sounded sad. “You… past you, I mean. I wanted so badly for you to wait, to try and find a better way to save you. Instead, you did what you thought you had to do to save us. I can’t blame you for that.” Stiles blinked. He had made the choice to lose his memories? Kira had definitely left that part out. He was trying to imagine what would have pushed him far enough to do that when he realized Scott was talking again.
“There was a while where I thought that I should just let you go on with your life, not knowing about any of this. I thought that it would be safer for you to be away from it and just live a normal life. But I can’t.” He looked back at Stiles, his eyes shining in the sunset. “You’re still you, Stiles. I can’t let you go that easily.”
Stiles felt his throat tighten as he looked at Scott. The emotions on his face were so real that in that moment, any doubts Stiles still had about if he’d even lost his memories at all vanished. He wished, for that one fervent moment, that he could will his memories back into existence. He wanted to be able to remember why Scott cared about him so much. He wanted to be able to say something that came even remotely close to matching the emotions on Scott’s face. He knew that without knowing the full truth of the past, there was no way he could even try. Instead, he pushed his feelings to the back of his mind and said the only thing he could think of.
“Then don’t.” He leaned over and nudged Scott’s shoulder with his own. “Hey, if there’s a way to remove memories, there’s got to be a way to put them back. Once we’re not being chased down by a weird shadow demon anyway.”
They sat in silence for a moment. Stiles had to wonder if he’d said the right thing or not. He didn’t know Scott enough to tell for sure. He wondered what it had been like to be close friends with him. He didn’t really have any memories of a close friend, and he had to admit that his mental image of Scott had been totally wrong. Werewolf or not, he wasn’t the Jackson type jock that Stiles had assumed him to be.
Suddenly, Scott’s head snapped up. He looked past Stiles into the woods. Stiles glanced over his shoulder into the darkness between the trees. When he looked back, Scott’s eyes were glowing red again. He managed not to yelp in surprise with a force of effort.
“Um. Scott? What’s up?”
“I heard something.” Scott’s voice had a little bit of a growl in it. Stiles felt the hairs on his arms stand up.
“Something? What… what kind of something?” He looked back at the trees as if he was going to see something this time. Unsurprisingly, he was met with the same impenetrable trees as before. The repressed yelp from before escaped as Scott’s hand fell on his shoulder.
“I’m going to check it out. You stay here.” His hand slipped away as he stood.
“Wait, you’re leaving me here? Alone?” Stiles swallowed past the lump rising in his throat. For all his big words about being able to take care of himself, he wasn’t feeling very brave at the moment. The sun hadn’t set yet, but it was only a matter of time until they were going to be left in pitch blackness. Scott looked back at him, eyes still glowing, and something of what Stiles was feeling must have given itself away because the glow faded as quickly as it had come.
“I’m not going far,” he said, his hand returning to Stiles’ shoulder. “If anything happens, I’ll come running. I’m not going to let anything happen to you this time, I promise.” With that, he turned and disappeared into the trees without giving Stiles a chance to respond.
“I don’t like the sound of ‘this time’,” Stiles informed the empty clearing. He sighed, wrapping his arms around himself. He didn’t like feeling this helpless. He had to wonder if this was how he’d felt all the time before he’d lost his memories. It didn’t seem likely that he’d just sat around like a damsel in distress, but honestly what else could he have done? Punched a demon in the face?
There was a snap to his left. Stiles froze. His heartbeat thudded in his ears, which meant that his blood probably hadn’t literally turned to ice. He didn’t want to turn his head, but he did. He couldn’t see anything in the fading light other than the shadows of trees.
“Scott?” He said without much hope, carefully sliding off the hood of the Jeep. In response, two green spots of light flashed at him out of the shadows and he stumbled back several steps as the shape of the Shadow Stalker separated itself from the darkness. It was moving slowly, careful steps that seemed to be in no hurry. Stiles reached down blindly and picked up a stick, brandishing it in front of him.
“Stay back!” He said, trying to sound threatening and missing by a mile. The Shadow Stalker took another step towards Stiles. He felt as if he were rooted to the spot. Some part of him knew that he ought to run, that there was no way that he was going to be able to win in a confrontation with this thing, but instead he found himself staring into the glowing eyes while the world faded around him. The stick slipped from his fingers. He was belatedly starting to wonder if he should scream when the Shadow Stalker opened its mouth and spoke in the same whispery voice he’d heard at the school.
“You have been touched by darkness.” Stiles was startled enough that it broke through the numb fear gripping him. He had heard it speak at the school, but he hadn’t known it was smart enough to say whole sentences. It took a moment for him to actually process what had been said.
“I have?” He said blankly. The shadowy mouth stretched even wider. Stiles shivered as it stepped even closer.
“Darkness in your mind. It obscures what is important to you. It obscures your past.”
“My memories?” Stiles forced his foot off the ground to take a step backwards, knowing that he should be doing anything other than talking to this thing. “How do you know about those?” The Shadow Stalker let out a hissing noise like a kettle heating up.
“The darkness is clear to those who know what to look for.” It reached out, its arm dripping shadows onto the ground, and somehow it was close enough that the clawed hand was coming straight for Stiles’ face. He flinched, but when he didn’t feel anything he cracked an eye open to see that the claws had stopped barely an inch from his face. He swallowed hard.
“What- what do you want?” He stammered out. “Are you going to eat me? Because I’d really rather you didn’t.” The creature hissed again.
“I hunger, but not for your flesh.”
“Oh.” Stiles, not knowing what else to do, kept talking. “I don’t really have anything else. I could probably get you some takeout or something?”
“I crave your darkness.” Stiles blinked. The creature’s eyes were a steady glow that had somehow gotten even closer to him. The whole world had faded away now. It was as if he were standing in a world of shadow, with only the green glow to anchor him to where he was. He wondered if his past self would have handled this better.
“If I let you eat my, uh, darkness. Will you leave?” The Shadow Stalker’s eyes dipped in what he could only assume was a nod. Stiles took a shaky breath. As he pulled together every ounce of courage he could, he couldn’t help but wonder if this was the same feeling he’d had before losing his memories. He had no idea what he was about to lose this time. “Then you can have it.” The words left his mouth before he could even try and think better of them. The green eyes in front of him blazed even more brightly. A wind blew up from nowhere, swirling around Stiles, and somehow the light bled into the wind until he had to raise his arms to try and shield himself from the brightness whirling around him. He squeezed his eyes shut, but somehow he could still see the light. It was inside of him as well, whirling his mind into a frenzy where he couldn’t think, and he had just opened his mouth to scream when somehow it was over and the world returned with a snapping feeling.
Stiles felt his legs tremble briefly, the last sparks of green light fading from around him, before he was on his knees without ever making the decision to stop standing. He looked down at his hands in time to see a green light leave his veins as well. He felt strangely at peace. The whirling in his mind began to slow, the puzzle pieces of his past falling and slotting themselves in where they had fit all along. He had no idea how he had ever thought that there wasn’t anything missing from his life. He shook his head, and then somehow Scott was in front of him, his eyes full of concern.
“Stiles! Are you okay? What happened? I’m sorry, you were right, I shouldn’t have left you alone, I should have been here, I saw this crazy light-” Stiles found himself slowly smiling, then laughing out loud. Scott was looking at him as if he might have gone crazy. Stiles reached forward and grabbed his best friend in the tightest hug he could manage.
“I’m so sorry,” he said in Scott’s ear. “I can’t believe I ever let myself forget you, Scott.” Scott’s shoulders stiffened as he sucked in a shaky breath. When he spoke, he sounded as if he was afraid to even hope.
“Stiles?” He didn’t say more than that. He didn’t have to. Stiles closed his eyes.
“Yeah,” he said. “Yeah, I’m back.” The tension melted out of Scott’s shoulders as he let out a small sob, his arms seizing Stiles and squeezing him so tightly that he lost his breath for a moment. Stiles couldn’t have said how long they stayed there, holding each other and just savoring being together again. When they pulled apart, Scott looked at Stiles’ face as though he’d never seen it before and he wanted to memorize every detail. Stiles reached a hand out to rub some grime off of Scott’s cheek. If there were some tears that got wiped away as well, he wasn’t about to mention it.
“You’re a mess,” he said. Scott huffed out a laugh.
“Seriously? That’s all you have to say?” His hand was trembling slightly as he brushed Stiles’ hair out of his face. “I thought I’d lost you,” he said softly, his fingers lingering. Stiles winced. He should have expected this part of the conversation. In all honesty, it was a miracle that Scott wasn’t jumping straight into yelling at him for being an idiot. He probably would have deserved it. He remembered the last conversation they’d had, Scott’s desperate pleas to him to wait as Stiles made the choice to let his past be taken away. He wouldn’t have blamed Scott at all for being angry. Instead, Scott was looking at him with such a gentle look in his eyes that Stiles felt as if he were about to burst apart. He forced himself to take a breath, knowing that he had to say something.
“To tell you the truth, I almost didn’t do it,” he said, his hands clenching into fists in his lap. “I knew that it was the only way to keep everyone safe, but there was one moment right before I said yes that I almost backed out, where I thought there might have been another way. I-” He faltered. Scott reached out again, this time taking one of Stiles’ hands in his own and squeezing it lightly.
“I would have done it in your place,” he said. “I’m not… I understand why you did it, Stiles.” Stiles raised his eyebrows.
“Giving me excuses?” He shook his head, not giving Scott a chance to respond. “I know you would have, Scott. You’re always saving everyone else. I felt like this was one of the only chances I was going to have to do the same.” He hesitated, glancing at the expression on Scott’s face. Scott looked like his heart was breaking as he watched Stiles. It made him want to squirm out of his skin. “What?”
“Stiles, you don’t-” Scott stopped, clearly not knowing what to say. He cleared his throat and tried again. “I couldn’t do half of what I do without you,” he said, his voice catching. “You’re my anchor, Stiles. You keep me grounded; you make sure that I’m okay. Without you…” he trailed off, looking down as he squeezed Stiles’ hand tightly again. “You’re the one who saves me,” Scott said, so quietly that Stiles almost wasn’t sure if he had been meant to hear it. He could feel himself blushing as he tried to process what Scott had just said. A tiny spark of warmth bloomed inside of his chest. He squeezed Scott’s hand back. Scott looked back up at him, and Stiles couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face.
“The reason I hesitated,” he said, surprised at how easily the words came, “is because of you, Scott. I couldn’t even imagine what my life would be like without you in it.” He was the one to reach out this time, capturing Scott’s other hand. “And as it turns out,” he said in a teasing voice, “life without you is pretty boring.” Scott shook his head, leaning forward until their foreheads gently tapped together.
“We are never doing anything like that ever again,” he said firmly. Stiles closed his eyes, leaning slightly into Scott’s warmth.
“I don’t know, we came through it okay once; we could probably do it again.” He opened one eye to see Scott glaring at him and smiled. “Not funny?"
“Not even a little.” Scott sighed, his breath brushing against Stiles’ face. He pulled his hands away to grab Stiles in another hug, pulling him in close and burying his face in Stiles’ shoulder. Stiles hugged him back without hesitation. When Scott finally let him go, he put his hands back on Stiles’ shoulders and looked him firmly in the eye “Never, ever leave me alone like that. Promise?”
“I’ll try?” Scott frowned. Stiles rolled his eyes. “Scott, with the lives we lead are you honestly expecting that I have any say in the matter?” Scott sighed.
“I wish that was less true.” He let his hands fall back between them. Stiles smiled at him, hearing the sound of their names being called in the distance by the rest of the pack. Scott groaned and hauled himself to his feet, offering Stiles a hand up. Stiles let himself be pulled up just as the girls came bursting through the trees, Malia in the lead with claws fully out and Kira right behind her with her sword at the ready.
“What happened?” Lydia demanded from behind them. “We saw this green light coming from this way.” Scott frowned and looked back at Stiles.
“What did actually happen? You never said.”
“Oh. The Shadow Stalker was here. I’m pretty sure it’s gone now though, it got what it wanted.” Malia and Kira both relaxed their fight stances, looking confused. Lydia’s eyes narrowed as she looked at him.
“What did you do?” She demanded. Stiles pointed to himself in disbelief.
“Me? I didn’t do anything! Why do you always jump to assuming that it’s my fault?” He paused, remembering giving the Shadow Stalker permission to eat something of his even when he hadn’t known what it was saying. It was probably not a good idea to mention that part.
“What did it want then? It was pretty clearly after you,” Kira said tentatively. “So did it want something that you had?” Scott’s eyes widened.
“Wait, is that why your memories are back? The Shadow Stalker did that?”
“Your memories-” Malia snapped back to her human self as she stared at Stiles. “You remember?” Kira’s face lit up. Lydia was now staring at Scott.
“How would the Shadow Stalker – and you!” She whirled back to Stiles, taking a step towards him. Somehow it was almost as intimidating as when the Shadow Stalker had been moving towards him. “You didn’t think that it was worth mentioning that your memories are back?” He raised his hands defensively in front of himself.
“Hey, you’ve been here for all of thirty seconds! When was I supposed to say something exactly?” Everyone was staring at him now. Stiles let his hands fall with a sigh. “Yes, the Shadow Stalker gave me my memories back. I don’t know how exactly, but that’s what the crazy light show did.”
“Is that why it was after you?” Kira clapped her hands together. “So, it didn’t want to hurt you!”
“We don’t know that for sure,” Scott said, giving Stiles a worried look. “What if it did something else too?”
“Can we not have a nice thing without being paranoid for five minutes?” Stiles said in exasperation. “Come on, Scotty. I’m supposed to be the cynical one, remember?”
“For once, I agree with Stiles.” Lydia just smiled when he turned to glare at her.
“For once?”
“Just take the compliment.”
“So, if the Shadow Stalker is gone, does that mean we don’t have to spend the rest of the night in the woods?” Malia asked. Stiles shrugged.
“I don’t see any reason why we can’t leave.” He elbowed Scott. “You can worry more in the morning.” Scott looked like he wanted to protest, but after a look at Stiles’ face, he let it go. As the rest of the pack moved towards the Jeep, he grabbed Stiles’ hand to hold him back.
“I’m spending the night at your house.” Stiles blinked.
“I’m not going to suddenly vanish.” Scott’s grip tightened slightly, and Stiles sighed, turning to face him completely. “I promised, remember?” He squeezed Scott’s hand back. “But you can spend the night if you want. That just means you have to help explain what happened to my dad.”
As it turned out, explaining things to his dad wasn’t that hard. He ended up taking one look at Stiles walking through the door, grimy from the woods with Scott hard on his heels, and immediately got a look of profound relief on his face. He strode forward and managed to seize both of them in the same hug.
“I shouldn’t be so glad to see you two looking like something the cat dragged in,” he informed them, stepping back so he could look at Stiles.
“It’s not like it’s uncommon.” Stiles considered this and then looked at Scott. “Wait, how long has it been? You never said.” Scott looked uncomfortable. It was Stiles’ dad who filled in the answer.
“It’s been almost 4 months at this point.” Stiles turned back to him, eyes wide.
“Wait, seriously?” He looked down at his hands, trying to do some mental math. Scott’s hand on his back disrupted him. When he looked at his face, Scott was looking at him with his lips pressed together and worried eyes. Stiles gave up on the math.
“What exactly happened out there?” His dad asked. “Scott, you said something about a shadow creature?”
“Oh, the Shadow Stalker. It should be gone now.” Stiles smiled hopefully at his dad. He got a flat stare back in response and wilted slightly. “It said something about wanting darkness. I guess it was after whatever the nogitsune left behind in my head?”
“Wait, you didn’t tell me that.” Scott’s hand on his back tensed. “It took something from you?” Stiles waved his hand dismissively.
“Listen, I don’t know exactly what it did, okay? It went away and then my memories were back. I’m choosing not to complain about it.” His dad shook his head.
“I’d ask if you ever hear yourself, but I know the answer to that already.” He looked at Scott. “You staying here tonight?” Scott nodded. Stiles’ dad stepped forward and gripped Scott’s shoulder for a moment as they exchanged a look that Stiles couldn’t read before turning and heading into the living room. Stiles’ stomach chose that moment to rumble.
“Oh. Yeah, I guess we didn’t exactly have dinner, did we?” He looked at Scott. “You hungry?” Scott just shrugged. Stiles decided to take this as permission to do whatever he wanted and headed for the kitchen. He opened the fridge and stared inside. It was sadly lacking in interesting leftovers. He closed the door and turned towards the cupboards, thinking that he could grab a box of macaroni and cheese, only to see Scott standing there watching him tensely. He stopped in his tracks, not sure what to do.
“Scott? You okay?” He tried. Scott looked away from him. Stiles lowered his hand from where he had been reaching towards the cupboards. “Hey.”
“What exactly did the Shadow Stalker say to you?” Scott said, his voice quiet but on edge. Stiles winced. He should have known better than to think he could slide that into the conversation without Scott noticing.
“Look, it’s fine. It was just… I mean, a lot was happening, right?” Scott looked back up at him, his eyes flashing red for just an instant.
“It’s not fine, Stiles! What did it say?” Stiles found himself taking a step back, his hands in front of him before he’d even thought about it. Scott closed his eyes, putting a hand over them and taking a deep breath. “Sorry,” he muttered. Stiles paused, then carefully took a step forward.
“You don’t have to be sorry,” he said. “I didn’t want you to worry.” Scott laughed.
“It’s a little late for that.” He looked back up, and his eyes were back to their normal brown. “I don’t think I’m ever going to stop worrying that something could steal you away from me again. If I don’t know how the Shadow Stalker gave you your memories back, I don’t know if…” he trailed off, but Stiles took his point. He moved forward until he was close enough to put his hands on Scott’s shoulders.
“Hey. I’m here now, okay?” He leaned in until he could tap his forehead gently against Scott’s. “I’m here, and I’m real, and I remember you.” Scott’s hands came up to cover his as he took a shaky breath.
“I don’t know how to not worry about you.” Stiles smiled at him.
“Then worry about me,” he said. “It’s not like I don’t worry about you too. We can worry about each other.” He squeezed Scott’s shoulders lightly. “But that shouldn’t be the only thing we do, right? I mean, if we don’t know how long this is going to last, we should definitely enjoy it as much as possible.” Scott shook his head, his face close enough that some of his hair tickled Stiles’ forehead.
“I don’t understand how you can even make jokes about this.” He closed his eyes and let out another deep breath, the hot air brushing against Stiles’ face. Stiles found himself swallowing hard, suddenly very aware of the heat of Scott’s body next to his. He slid one hand out from beneath Scott’s and used it to brush the stray hairs out of his face. Scott opened his eyes and smiled crookedly at him. Stiles felt his heart skip a beat.
“No one in their right mind would ever leave you if they had the choice,” he whispered before he had time to think about it. Scott snorted.
“Are you going to try and convince me that you’re in your right mind?” Stiles opened his mouth to make a retort, but before he could his stomach rumbled again. Scott really laughed at that, stepping back. Stiles’ hand slid off Scott’s, and he resisted the urge to grab him and pull him closer. “Sorry, you were right. We should eat something.” Stiles felt his cheeks turning bright red and turned back towards the cupboard, opening the door to hide himself behind as he tried to slow his heartbeat. He turned back around with the box of mac and cheese in his hand to find Scott already pulling a pot out and turning towards the sink to fill it with water. He smiled as Scott turned back towards him with a quizzical expression.
“You need to stop reading my mind,” he said, bringing the box over to the stove. Scott rolled his eyes as he turned the burner on.
“The number of times that I’ve seen you make macaroni and cheese when you’re stressed, it would be more surprising if I didn’t know what was about to happen.” As Scott turned towards the fridge muttering about soda, Stiles felt himself relax. It was okay. Even after four months, they still knew each other. As long as they had that, they could figure the rest out as they went.
An entire pot of mac and cheese later found them in Stiles’ room getting ready for bed. For some reason, Stiles was surprised at how tired he was. If he stopped to think about it for more than half a second, it made sense that he felt as if he could just fall asleep on any horizontal surface after everything that had happened, but somehow now that they were here everything that had happened in the woods seemed a million miles away. Scott must have been just as tired as he was, because they were both quiet until they had climbed into the bed together and the lights were off.
“This doesn’t feel real,” Scott said quietly. Stiles rolled onto his side to face him. Scott was lying on his back, staring at the ceiling.
“It definitely beats spending the night in the woods.” Scott sighed.
“I haven’t been sleeping well anyway.” He looked over at Stiles. “It doesn’t feel like it’s been that long to you, does it?” Stiles considered this.
“It’s not that it doesn’t, it’s just that everything from when my memories were gone feels a little…” he waved his hand vaguely. “It’s like, I remember the nogitsune, and then my brain went on vacation or something. I know it happened, but it’s not the same as everything else.” He paused. “Man, that better not be true for all my classes or I’m definitely failing this semester.” Scott sighed.
“Stiles, you never study until the night before a test anyway.” Stiles grinned.
“You never know, maybe no memories me was different.”
“You were still you,” Scott said quietly. He rolled over to face Stiles now, his hand reaching out to tangle their fingers in between them. “You’re always going to be you.” Stiles watched their hands, feeling the warmth of Scott’s fingers on his. They were both quiet for a while. Stiles wondered what it was like to see someone you knew almost as well as you knew yourself and know that you were a stranger to them. It had to be one of the saddest feelings in the world. His fingers tightened around Scott’s as he thought about it. Scott looked at him, his eyes reflecting the streetlight outside.
“You weren’t sleeping?” Stiles said. Scott flinched. Stiles felt his heart twist in his chest. “Scott, I’m-”
“You don’t have to apologize.” Scott bit his lip for a moment before continuing. “Look, we could have this conversation a thousand times. What happened is what happened, there’s nothing we can do about it now.” Stiles frowned. That didn’t feel right to him.
“I hurt you,” he said. “I didn’t mean to, but in the end that’s what happened.”
“You were trying to save so many more people,” Scott pointed out. “And it’s like I said. You were still you.” He let out a deep breath. “I just don’t want to wake up in the morning and find out that we’re back there.” Stiles opened his mouth to say that they wouldn’t, then closed it again. There was no way he could promise that.
“Well, if it does, then we’ll just have to become friends again.” Scott looked at him, clearly startled, and Stiles tried for a smile. “I do remember that I didn’t have anyone I felt like was a friend. If you had approached me, I think I would have been happy about it. Obviously the Shadow Stalker was a bit much, but if that hadn’t been an issue…” he shook his head. “Look, the point is, I love you. If I’m still me, memories or not, then I’m going to still love you, right?” Scott’s eyes widened. Stiles didn’t even have time to think before Scott was moving towards him, and then somehow they were kissing, and it was the most natural thing in the entire world. Stiles felt his whole body grow warm as his eyes closed. It was the warmth of home, of blankets and warm nights on the porch. When Scott pulled away, the warmth on Stiles’ lips lingered. He opened his eyes to find Scott’s inches away.
“When you were gone, I didn’t want to pull you back into something that you didn’t need to be a part of,” Scott said quietly. “I thought I was doing you a favor by staying out of your life.” Stiles shook his head.
“How could you ever think my life would be better without you?” Scott smiled, his eyes so gentle that Stiles wanted to fall into them.
“Then you’re never getting rid of me, because I love you too.” He leaned in again, his lips lingering on Stiles’.
“If you love me then you need to get some sleep,” Stiles muttered as they broke apart. Scott laughed.
“Oh, is that how it works? Does this mean the next time you’re texting me at 2 in the morning I can play that card?”
“That is not a fair comparison at all,” Stiles informed him. “And besides, anything I’m working on that late is probably really important.” Scott’s eyebrows flew up.
“Oh really?” He started to roll over to grab his phone. Stiles grabbed him around the waist before he could get close enough to the bedside table.
“Would you stop it and just go to sleep already?” Scott looked down at him, clearly amused, but let himself be dragged back. Stiles snuggled into his side with a huff. Scott’s hand settled in his hair, combing through it gently.
“You’ll be here in the morning?” He whispered. Stiles, already feeling himself falling asleep, made a wordless noise of assent. The last thing he remembered before sliding into sleep was the feeling of Scott’s lips against his forehead.
The alarm blaring in the morning was an unpleasant reminder that no matter what happened with the world of the supernatural, the real world and high school did not care how much they had been through the night before. Stiles groaned and rolled over, glaring at the screen of his phone as he picked it up to turn the alarm off. Getting up sounded like the worst idea he could think of. He felt movement next to him and turned to see Scott rubbing his eyes as he sat up, yawning.
“Is it that time already?” He asked, his voice heavy with sleep. Stiles couldn’t help but smile at the sight of him, his hair sticking out in all directions. Scott blinked several times and looked at him. “What?” Stiles reached out and combed his hand through Scott’s hair, putting it back into some kind of order.
“I’m just happy to see you,” he said. Scott reached up and captured Stiles’ hand with both of his, bringing it down in between them as he searched Stiles’ face.
“You’re okay?” he said. Stiles wrinkled his nose.
“I need a shower, but otherwise I think so.” Scott didn’t look convinced. Stiles sighed and leaned forward, giving Scott a light kiss on the cheek. “I’m still me,” he said quietly. Scott let out a shaky breath and leaned his head against Stiles’ shoulder.
“Yeah,” he said. “You are.” He stayed there for a moment before straightening up and giving Stiles a light shove. “And you’re right, you do need a shower.” Stiles put a hand to his chest dramatically.
“Excuse me, it’s not my fault that we were running around in the woods last night!” Scott rolled his eyes, but he was smiling now. Stiles grinned back, gave Scott a quick kiss, and headed towards the bathroom.
One shower later, he caught up with Scott downstairs. His dad had already left for work. Scott was sitting at the kitchen counter, a bowl of cereal ignored in front of him as he scrolled his phone. Stiles was pleased to see that the coffee maker was full and grabbed a mug from the cupboard. Scott glanced up at him as he was filling it.
“Lydia wants to know how you’re doing.”
“Undercaffeinated,” Stiles said, taking a swig from his mug. “Why is your hair wet?”
“Your house has two showers,” Scott said absently. “What, did you want me to join you in yours?” Stiles froze, his mind presenting him with a vivid picture of what that would be like. He looked over to see Scott grinning at him.
“You’re evil, you know that?” Stiles stole Scott’s cereal and took a bite, taking some comfort in the fact that his cheeks were flushed too. He frowned as he chewed. “Hang on, what does everyone at school think has been happening anyway?”
“I think the rumor is that we had a fight over which of us was going to date Kira.” Scott shrugged, his thumbs tapping at his phone. “Or maybe it was Malia. I honestly wasn’t paying that close of attention.”
“Huh. That’s going to be interesting, considering that we’re dating each other now.” Scott froze, his fingers motionless over the phone screen. Stiles bit his lip, hoping he hadn’t put his foot in it.
“I think,” Scott said carefully after a minute, “That the rumor mill might explode.” He looked up at Stiles. “I hate how much you’re going to enjoy this.”
“I live to confuse people,” Stiles said cheerfully. Scott sighed and turned back to his phone, but he was smiling. Stiles let himself just watch him, enjoying the feeling of finally being home. They had found each other, and as long as they stayed together things were going to be all right.