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Shoko squints, the noon shine hitting her full in the face. Something beyond, in the arena, Gojo is fighting multiple Jugai at once.
‘Here.’
Beside her, Geto gives her a pair of round sunglasses. He doesn't have her problem, he's seated in the shade of a tree.
‘You were smarter than me.’
‘I... can move a little.’
Shoko stares at him for a second. It's their first year, she's only known her classmates for two weeks.
‘I'm fine, but he entrusted them to you.’
He shrugs.
‘I'll take my chances.’
With trembling fingers, she grasps them.
‘Thanks,’ she says, without looking up, ‘now I look like John Lennon.’
Geto suppresses a smile: the length of her hair does match.
‘We'll see you fight after him?’
Shoko glances at the back of his hand briefly before turning her gaze to the front.
‘Dunno, what if my cursed technique destroys the Jugai?’
‘Have you tried?’
‘No, but… I don't have those cool superpowers of yours.’
Silently, he looks at his mate. A blow strikes Gojo in the mouth and now his lips are bleeding. But Masamichi shows no mercy.
‘Say that again?’
Behind the sunglasses, Shoko blushes slightly.
‘Maybe I don't enjoy fighting just because my power isn't good for it.’
Geto shows her his injured knuckles.
‘Can you heal this?’
She nods before speaking.
‘You want me to do it?’
‘Will it… hurt?’
Shoko shrugs and barely slides her fingertips on the back of his hand. First, he feels an intense cold, as if she put ice on it. A second later, that coldness is gone, and so is her touch.
‘So?’
He looks at his hand, estranged, opening and closing it as if he has never done it before. It wasn't a big wound, but it would have taken days to heal.
‘Actually, it felt kinda nice.’
Then, Masamichi's voice shouts at them.
‘Lunch time, we'll continue later.’
Geto lets out an almost imperceptible snort while Gojo strides up to them.
‘Give them back,’ he says, extending his palm toward Shoko.
She raises her eyebrows in surprise, but returns them silently.
‘I didn't think it would bother you,’ says Geto.
‘Now you do.’
‘... she can fix your lips, you know?’
Gojo slides his sunglasses down to the tip of his nose, to watch her over the rim. Too short, too skinny, a weak and stupid power.
‘Sorry, not my type.’
Shoko stares at him, not believing that guy's self-centeredness. But Geto looks amused.
‘And what is it?’
Gojo pretends to stay angry and remains silent, when the truth is he wouldn't know how to answer.
They usually meet to talk in Geto's room. It's messier than Shoko's, but tidier than Gojo's, and it's right in the middle of theirs.
‘So, thoughts?’ Gojo asks, sitting on the floor.
‘He said he's a panda,’ says Shoko.
‘Doesn't fit, too human.’
‘Right,’ says Geto, ‘it has hands, not paws.’
‘Did you focus on that? It's a talking panda!’
Shoko rolls her eyes.
‘Suguru, could he have been a curse?’
He smiles. It's the first time she calls him by name.
‘No, I couldn't have absorbed it.’
‘Did you try?’ Gojo asks.
‘I don't need to do it to sense what I can absorb.’
‘Thus it must be a Jugai. A perfect one, yeah, but a Jugai anyway.’
‘Hmm, I wouldn't call him an 'it' in front of Masamichi.’
Then, someone else knocks on the door. The three of them exchange quick glances.
‘You go, it's your room,’ says Shoko.
Geto freezes for a moment.
‘Satoru, you're closer, you go.’
Reluctantly, he crawls to it. On the other side, a young woman looks down at him.
‘Excuse me, I'm looking for the second-years, but no one answers.’
‘That's because we're all here,’ says Geto. ‘So, what do you need?’
‘It's to invite you to the Goodwill at Kyoto Academy.’
At that moment, Gojo jumps to his feet and scans her with his eyes. Although she's taller than Shoko, she's shorter than he is and doesn't look excessively thin either, though her bangs are too straight, too neatly combed.
‘Who are you again?’
But he must admit he likes her eyebrows to be seen.
‘Right... I wasn't quite polite. I'm Utahime Iori, Second Grade, and I was sent by Gakuganji.’
Something shines in Gojo's eyes.
‘And what's exactly your power?’
Usually, Utahime doesn't have patience for idiots, but no one has ever wasted it so quickly. Beneath her bangs, her brow furrows and Gojo smiles sideways. That length is a hit, it adds to her expressiveness.
‘I don't see how it affects what I came for.’
‘I'm... just curious.’
‘Don't,’ says Shoko, ‘no answer is good for him.’
‘Not even mine,’ adds Geto.
Pressing a hand to his chest, Gojo turns to look at them.
‘What's wrong in knowing our colleagues better? I bet she's heard about me... I mean us.’
He's looking at Utahime again, but she's catching a glimpse of Shoko gently shaking her head.
‘No idea,’ she replies firmly. ‘If you'll all go, then I'll get three tickets.’
‘Tickets?’ Shoko asks.
‘Kyoto Academy won last time, so it's your turn to be the guests.’
There's a clear hint of pride in her voice. So, she bows to them and leaves. It's Geto who breaks the silence.
‘We had lost?’
‘Who cares,’ says Gojo, ‘this year we'll be there, it's already won.’
Then, Geto kneels and extends a hand at him, as if he were holding something.
‘Satoru Gojo, will you be my squire?’
In response, he covers his mouth with a hand.
‘I thought you'd never ask. And you'd be mine?’
‘In this life or the next.’
Beside them, Shoko bites her lips.
‘I'm out of here.’
‘C'mon, don't be boring,’ Gojo says. ‘You can still get a squire… maybe the first-year sad boy.’
‘Who? Nanami?’
‘Poor thing never smiled in his life.’
‘You'd better not tell me what you think of me,’ Shoko says.
She gets up quickly and leaves as well, so Gojo frowns at his friend.
‘I don't get it, was it something I said?’
Geto sighs and gently shakes his head.
‘Satoru, don't give her ideas.’
‘What, the emo kid? They'd match well.’
Half patient, half angry, Geto smiles.
‘I'm talking about me.’
Gojo only understands it by looking at his face. Then, his mouth falls open.
‘I didn't know you liked her that way.’
‘Now you do.’
Satoru stares at him for a few seconds. His surprised face gradually relaxes until it turns into a sly smile.
‘That second grader, she's my type tho.’
‘Older?’
‘Nice looking, proud, strong temper—’
‘Grumpy.’
‘... potato, potahto.’
‘Sorry, what were you saying?’
Gojo leans back in his seat.
‘You look awful.’
‘I know,’ Shoko says, ‘I couldn't sleep a wink last night.’
Slowly, as if hesitating, he takes off his round sunglasses and offers them to her.
‘So I don't see the ugly circles under your eyes.’
In different circumstances, she would smile.
‘I'm finally worth it?’
‘I'm... already regretting it.’
He glances to the side as she grabs them. When she's about to thank him, Geto speaks.
‘What's been worrying you?’
Shoko watches him silently, feeling a sudden stitch of affection for him.
‘It's... Utahime, she's not answering her phone.’
Gojo fiddles with his hashi, to stay cool.
‘How did you get her number?’
‘A friend of mine can track people. Data and powers.’
For an instant, he looks genuinely impressed.
‘Bring him in! To find new sorcerers.’
‘Idiot,’ Shoko mutters. ‘I just treated her well and she gave it to me.’
Geto clicks his tongue.
‘So that's why we never heard from her or Kyoto again.’
He's about to say something else when Gojo speaks louder.
‘Are you friends now?’
Shoko narrows her eyes and answers slowly.
‘You can say so.’
‘And do you talk about me?’
He raises an eyebrow and smiles sideways. In his mirror —she thinks— he must find himself handsome that way. Then she subtly glances up at Geto, who's smiling condescendingly.
‘Not at all.’
Gojo snorts and looks at his phone, bored.
‘How long has it been?’ asks Geto.
‘Two nights.’
‘Maybe she's just busy.’
‘She was going on a mission… and we always write to each other when they're done.’
He stares at her and purses his lips inward. Somehow, she senses it's the most sincere expression she's ever seen from him.
‘You should let someone know... just in case.’
Suddenly, Shoko feels something relaxing inside her as her mind seems to clear as well. And, barely conscious of it, she smiles shyly at him.
‘You're right, I'll go to Yaga... thank you.’
He smiles back and remains blank until she leaves. Then, he turns to Gojo, who is playing Snake.
‘Maybe treating her like a weakling isn't your best move, dude.’
‘Huh? Utahime? But she is.’
‘How would you feel if someone called you weak?’
‘Don't be foolish, how could anyone call me that if I'm not?’
Geto shakes his head.
‘I'm saying that sometimes you make others feel bad.’
So, Gojo stops playing and looks at him seriously.
‘Then should I lie and call her strong?’
‘No, just... if you don't have something nice to tell her, don't speak at all.’
But he's back to his usual self.
‘Oi, it's a joke,’ he says, patting Geto's shoulder. ‘No biggie.’
‘And she knows that?’
Gojo stays quietly until Shoko is back. She seems agitated.
‘Masamichi said we should go as soon as possible.’
‘It's not fair, you're making us work,’ Gojo reproaches her.
But, little by little, remembering who they have to pick up, his expression relaxes.
‘I'm s—’
‘Forget it, I was getting bored anyway.’
Geto alternately looks at his friends while hoping this time Gojo won't make any of the girls feel weak. Shit, he'd sign a heavenly contract if it prevented that.
Suguru doesn't feel his body. He is badly wounded, although he doesn't think this is how he dies. It's too pathetic, on a wet, buried dirt floor, almost like a subway swamp on the shores of his failure. Riko's corpse is gone, only the traces left by her blood. For now, all he can do is rely on the damp cold underground to numb his pain.
Immeasurably later, a warm hand rests on his cheek. Before understanding, her soft voice is calling his name.
‘Suguru, are you with me?’
Geto meets her as if in a dream. He doesn't feel pain anymore and the ground isn't that wet or cold either. Instead of looking into her eyes, Suguru sees her cheek mole. Robert De Niro's mole.
‘You too?’
Shoko sees him lying in his own blood and struggles to go on. These are real, not training camp injuries.
‘What do you mean?’
Suguru tracks a tear on her cheek. Reaching her mole, it enlarges it as if it were a magnifying glass. He smiles. Death isn't that bad if he's with his friends.
‘Satoru is dead,’ he says coldly, ‘as I must be.’
She chuckles sadly at him. Then she slides her hand to his tangled hair and strokes it tenderly. Suguru closes his eyes to enjoy her touch.
‘You're not dead, you idiot, but you need some reverse cursed technique.’
Shoko avoids telling him she found him with no perceptible vital signs and healed him until she got a reaction.
‘Satoru?’
‘We couldn't find him... Yaga and I.’
Geto nods once and lets her make her magic. His eyes are still closed, Shoko prefers it that way. Finishing, she helps him sit up and then she slips her forearm around his back to help him stand up.
So, for the first time, Suguru stares at her eyes. They are puffy and red, with quiet tears welling down from them. He wishes he were completely recovered to move them away, though he makes the effort to raise his hand anyway.
Shoko senses his fingertips wiping her face and a lot of things manifest inside her, especially relief.
‘It feels good,’ he says.
She sketches a smile.
‘C'mon, hold on to me.’
But he needs to say something else before healing for good and his own mind stopping him.
‘I really love your mole.’
Shoko freezes and just looks at him. That had been close... she had been close to losing him. Besides, he probably wouldn't remember it in the morning.
‘And I really like your hair.’
Her whisper mixes with her bittersweet tears falling on his chest. And, even if the world is about to fall apart, Suguru feels at peace.
‘Can you carry me? Aren't I too heavy?’
‘I'm the strongest now.’
He feels the urge to smile and all goes well until they pass over Riko's blood. Inevitably, Suguru stares at it as his mind wanders again.
‘I was supposed to save her.’
Shoko stops and rubs his back. And then, as never before, she needs to hug him.
‘Some fates can't change, Suguru.’
Slowly, he wraps his arm around her shoulders.
‘Hers might have if you had been here. Do you get it now?’
There is no reproach in his voice, just a wish.
‘What are you talking about?’
‘Your powers are to balance the damage Satoru and I caused.’
Quietly, Shoko squeezes him in the ribs gently and lets him rest his weight on her body.
She hears him with an absent expression, as if she had just woken up. Satoru clutches the written order and squeezes it between his fingers.
‘It may be slander,’ she says.
‘No,’ he replies curtly.
Unconsciously, her hands are fumbling around her pockets. What a time to be running out of tobacco.
‘It's fine, he made his choice. We didn't do anything.’
Then, Gojo looks at her with blurred eyes.
‘That's the point, I didn't do anything.’
His mind wanders to the cult that ordered Riko killed. For him, in that instant, he planted the bad seed in Geto.
‘You can hardly answer for your own actions, Satoru. Don't blame yourself.’
He's not listening and Shoko feels a bit annoyed. So she gets out of there and walks until her head becomes quiet.
Suguru senses her cursed energy before seeing her. How hadn't he noticed it before? She has an incredible amount, it just seemed lower next to Gojo's. Shoko slows down at a bus stop and finally takes out a cigarette. She barely realizes she has no lighter when she hears his voice.
‘Need a light?’
She turns and finds him exactly as usual, though his hair is down and he's better asleep.
‘Were you following me?’
Geto smiles sideways and slowly approaches her. Then, some wordless struggle begins in between. Shoko doesn't move, wanting to know how far he dares to go; he stares at her, pleased to have an excuse to do so.
‘Do you believe in coincidences?’
Damn, he's cute. Shoko feels like she's never given the chance to notice it before and now it's a fact shouted in her face. Suguru bows with a gentleness nobody else but her would have thought him capable of and lights her cigarette without even brushing against her.
‘You know I don't.’
‘Then you'll have to trust me.’
Shoko steps back slightly to avoid blowing the ashen air in his face. Her mind seems clearer now.
‘What do you want?’
‘You could say I'm testing my luck.’
She chuckles sarcastically.
‘I won't kill you, if that's your question.’
Geto gives her one of those fake smiles of his and Shoko finally thinks she understands: he uses them when he represses what he truly feels.
‘Actually, I thought to ask you if you'd like to join me.’
She freezes, the cigarette a few inches from her mouth.
‘Why should I?’
Then, he looks softer at her.
‘I wanna be there when you expand your domain, see how it works.’
‘What? And have your enemies healed all at once?’
‘No. Look, I just... want you.’
He says it in his sweetest tone and Shoko feels her skin crawl. Ashes accumulate on the tip of her cigarette, but she can't react to clear them away.
‘Why me?’
Fiddling with the lighter, Suguru opens his hands in the air.
‘Wasn't it obvious?’
Slowly, she averts her eyes to the ground. But there's something she can't miss, the elephant in the room.
‘I'll ask for the hell of it—are those accusations against you false?’
‘I'm afraid not.’
‘Then?’
‘My turn. Could you live knowing it?’
‘I... I don't know.’
‘If you can't, I guarantee you won't see me again.’
Shoko snatches the lighter from his hands to fiddle with it. So she closes her eyes and whispers, just enough for him to hear it.
‘And what if I can?’
‘Then we've already started.’
‘What?’
‘Look at these m... people, what do you think they'll think of us?’
‘I don't know… you're… so close.’
Smiling, Geto gently slips his fingers around her hand, trapping the lighter in the middle.
‘Now they definitely do.’
Shoko stares at his eyes, without pulling away.
‘Wait, I'm not leaving the academy. I must balance the damage you cause, remember?’
Geto's smile trembles slightly, but then he recovers it.
‘I take that.’
‘And I need to call Gojo... to sleep easy tonight.’
‘Could you do it in, say, two hours?’
She nods quietly.
‘This... is between you and me, right? Or will you give me away the first chance you get?’
Suguru holds out his free hand, without breaking eye contact.
‘I won't back out if you don't.’
Shoko lifts the cigarette to her lips and speaks in a low, firm tone.
‘No more killing people?’
Her words send a chill down his spine, like a bucket of cold water in winter. Agreeing with that would mean giving up most of his new freedom, but he doesn't wanna lose her either. Suguru knows there are more fish in the sea, he just doesn't care about them.
‘No more.’
Only then, Shoko shakes his hand. Sensing the lighter, she tries to give it back to him.
‘Thanks, it saved me.’
‘Keep it, I don't smoke anyway.’
She arches an eyebrow.
‘And you call yourself a bad boy?’
‘What can I say, I haven't mastered the reverse cursed technique.’
‘I… may give you a hand.’
‘No need. By the way, you know I'm kinda a dad now?’
‘How? You've just been gone a few days.’
‘Hey, let me explain myself.’
Utahime stirs her tea, glancing sideways at Shoko. In front of them, the view is painted pink. It's sakura season.
‘You should turn off your cell phone, let that idiot fend for himself.’
Shoko stirs in her seat and hides the phone in her jacket.
‘I know. I just... never left before.’
‘Please, you're the only one who deserves a vacation,’ she says, sipping. ‘He just wanders away, no responsibilities.’
‘Enough, he still asks me if we talk about him when I'm with you.’
Utahime lets out a little snort.
‘And what do you answer?’
‘Not even once.’
‘That's good,’ she says smiling, ‘not that we do it either.’
Shoko frowns her eyebrows.
‘We're doing it now.’
With a trembling pulse, Utahime sips from her cup.
‘Fine, I'll admit it but only to you.’
Shoko smiles and turns her gaze to the sakuras. She loves Utahime's company, who seems the only reasonable person left in the world. Although, oftenly, she feels guilty for not being quite honest with her.
‘Have you really never thought of Gojo that way?’ Shoko thinks out loud.
Quickly, she covers her mouth with her hand, even though the damage is done and now she wants to hear her answer. Utahime lowers the cup and stares at her proudly.
‘Why are you asking? He wants to find that out too?’
‘Like I care what he wants. But, as friends, you wouldn't even say he's cute?’
‘Would you?’
‘Not a chance. Too chatty.’
‘Then there's your answer.’
‘Hmm… his face is okay tho.’
Utahime sighs.
‘True, but he's still too cocky. Let me know if he ever stops thinking about himself.’
She smiles, but Shoko finds her a little sad. Then, she is encouraged to give her an advice she doesn't dare to follow herself.
‘If you have any feelings for him, don't miss the chance to tell him.’
‘What? Where does that come from?’
She shrugs.
‘Dunno.’
‘Right... and what about you? Someone you wanna talk about?’
Shoko shakes her head and sips her tea, thinking it would be easier with a cigarette.
‘If I ever seriously like someone, you'll be the first to know.’
‘Yeah, but you could tell me a little.’
‘Not worth it, believe me,’ she says, waving her hand.
Immediately after, with her mouth closed, she bites her cheek. Utahime purses her lips, but ends up accepting it.
‘If you say so… by the way, will you survive tomorrow? I'm sorry I don't have any free days left, but I can go out in the evening.’
Shoko doesn't try to hide her smile.
‘Don't worry, I'll find something to do. It must be beautiful walking in Kyoto under the sakura blossoms.’
Utahime smiles softly. She's resting from Gojo, she'd be fine.
Still in her pajamas, she shuffles over to where they are eating breakfast.
‘Nanako, you borrowed my blue dress?’
Her sister barely looks at her, even more tired than she is.
‘Yeah, you can take my black skirt instead.’
‘Deal. Good morning, dad.’
They only dare to call him that when they are alone. Geto smiles and strokes her back.
‘I thought you forgot to say it.’
‘No way... but it's so early.’
He widens his smile.
‘We have a long day ahead of us.’
‘Where are we going?’ asks Nanako, her mouth full of rice.
‘For a walk and then to the movies.’
‘Give us a try—’
‘—the latest of Robert De Niro?’
‘Any problem?’
‘No,’ says Mimiko, ‘but his films aren't what they were.’
‘Yeah, deal with it.’
Suguru chuckles under his breath.
‘Careful, girls, I haven't bought tickets for the concert yet.’
‘But you will, won't you?’ says Nanako.
Tenderly, he wraps his arm around her shoulders and kisses her forehead.
‘I will.’
‘What about today?’ asks Mimiko, approaching them to be hugged. ‘Will Shoko come?’
‘You silly, why else would we be in Kyoto?’
‘New curses?’
‘Hey, hey, we're here on vacation. But you can't go out like that, go take a shower.’
Mimiko snorts and walks to the bathroom while Nanako smiles smugly. From the door frame, with a towel over her shoulder, she turns to them.
‘I like Shoko... I mean, if it gets serious.’
Geto sketches a fake smile.
‘Why is that?’
‘She doesn't feel better, she treats us as equals.’
‘And she's a girl. Sorry, dad, but there are things you don't get.’
Mimiko nods and Geto smiles, genuinely this time. He takes out his phone and texts her. They would be there in an hour.
Shoko leaves the Tokyo academy on Friday night, knowing she won't return until Sunday. At her feet, autumn leaves crunch under her heels. She checks the address he gave her on her phone and looks for the subway station to get off at.
Arriving, she finds a spacious house. After knocking three times, he comes out to greet her.
‘I'd better not ask any questions,’ says Shoko with a small smile.
Geto invites her in, closing the door behind her.
‘It's mine for two weeks, a friend is out of the country.’
Shoko knows perfectly well what he means by 'friend': one of the victims of his cult. But she chooses to inhale deeply and move on.
‘By yourself?’
Then, she feels his hands grabbing the lapel of her coat from behind. Suguru gently takes it off and embraces her by the waist.
‘No, with you.’
He whispers in her ear and Shoko feels her legs go slack. As best she can, she turns to face him and looks for his lips. So, Suguru pulls her closer to himself and slowly kisses her back. Shoko surrenders to his touch until his parsimony makes her despair.
‘You always... love me... in dribs and drabs.’
She whispers it against his lips and Suguru feels the urge to do it all right there. But he represses it, they'd have all weekend long.
‘It's my way of making sure you'll come back.’
Shoko stands on tiptoe and catches his lower lip between hers, to bite it gently. What bothers her most is knowing that he is right.
The cold night air hits her ears, dazing her. Below them, the buildings run past like they were tiny animals.
‘You really like big entrances!’
Looking down at his flying curse, Geto furrows his eyebrows. They need to shout to be heard.
‘I don't find him that big.’
Though it is and Shoko holds on to Suguru in an unconscious search for safety.
‘You'll give me away! This is why I didn't want you to pick me up!’
Her tone is amused and Suguru knows he shouldn't worry. But he stops the flight anyway and focuses on her.
‘Would that be terrible?’
So Shoko stares at him, admiring the details of the instant: his hair waving in the wind, the moonlight shining directly into his eyes, the shadow of her head covering the rest of his face. It's like a dream, somewhat distant and unreal, manifesting right in front of her.
‘Suguru… you know you're wanted,’ she says, almost apologizing.
‘You'd never choose my side, would you?’
She gives him a sad, broken smile. It's hard for her to answer.
‘I know it doesn't mean much to say it now but... I do love you.’
At least, it feels good admitting it after so many years. Suguru sighs.
‘I love you too. And I'm sorry.’
‘Why?’
‘I'll give you... some extra work this Christmas.’
It takes Shoko a moment to get it. What gives him away are his eyes.
‘You'll kill again?’
‘I kept my word as long as I could, but the time has come.’
He slowly shrugs, almost like a new apology. Shoko glances up into the long, distant sky they could never reach. If they could fly higher, perhaps they would escape these earthly bonds.
‘So this is our farewell.’
When she looks at him again, Suguru sees the glistening of tears streaming down her face.
‘It doesn't have to be that way.’
He guides his hand to her mole cheek, she gently pushes him away. It doesn't need to be any harder.
‘You chose well, I must say. The night, the flight, the moonlight. Quite memorable.’
Suguru would like to talk about it but realizes that would only make things worse. The best he can do now is be as honest as possible with her.
‘I lied to you, once. I told you I wouldn't back out if you didn't, but I wouldn't even when you do.’
Through tears, Shoko smiles at him.
‘Are you kidnapping me now? I wouldn't know how to get off this thing.’
He stares at her one last time. He'll miss this.
‘I'm saying I won't call you anymore, but you can call me.’
Then, Suguru reaches into his pocket for a lighter and hands it to her. He always carries one of those in case she needs it. Shoko takes it, playing with the liquid gas beneath the stars.
‘Maybe it's time for me to quit.’
‘Maybe.’
Geto tastes the metallic hint of his own blood inside his mouth. He smiles, somewhat maddened. He's realizing he underestimated Rika but, above all, Yuta. And, for the first time in a long time, he knows fear. This may be the night he dies.
He tries to think like him, to understand him, to see how to strike. What was the most important thing in the world to him at sixteen? Geto laughs unhinged when he finds the answer: Shoko and Satoru.
Now he could end this new generation for good and absorb Rika. But, then, Yuta approaches his friends and applies reverse cursed technique on them.
Suguru chooses to stop himself until he's done. He'd never attack someone who is using her power.
The wounded keep coming and Shoko can barely walk among them. She takes a moment to close her eyes tightly, hoping that the stormy scene will no longer be there when she opens them.
But everything remains just as bad and she knows it's her responsibility to handle it. Although she blames him, she recognizes he had the tact to warn her and, because of that, she makes her decision. They might be just monkeys to him, but they were just as valuable as sorcerers to her.
She never tried it before and this stressful situation isn't optimal, but she doesn't want their blood on her hands. So, Shoko chases away anyone who might disturb her and then presses her palms together. She inhales deeply and, pulling them apart, speaks in her clearest tone.
‘Domain expansion.’
A second later, all the wounded are surrounded by a long tunnel, as white as a hospital.
His shoulder is throbbing and his arm is no longer there, but the adrenaline of the fight makes him feel no pain. Leaning against a building, Geto tries to get away.
But, then, he senses his presence, that charge of cursed energy almost unbeatable. He gives up and drops down the wall to the ground. He wouldn't get out of this one.
‘Late again, as usual… Satoru.’
Gojo looks down at him from above, with an impersonal expression.
‘I knew you wouldn't kill young sorcerers without a reason.’
Geto laughs mockingly and throws Yuta's plastic card at him.
‘That's because, unlike you, I'm a kind person. What about my family?’
‘Every one of them managed to escape. Tell me, do you have any last words… Suguru?’
He uses two fingers as tweezers to take a paper out of his pants pocket. He succeeds, but the adrenaline has worn off and now he feels the pain. It's stupefying.
‘Here.’
‘You could simply say them.’
‘They aren't... for you. You should... regard the others... if you don't wanna die... like me.’
Deep inside, Gojo knows he's right. Then, slowly, he squats down in front of him to watch him from his same height.
‘You are not alone, you have your family.’
Geto thinks of his daughters and smiles through the hurt. He hopes that they grow up healthy and happy, that they don't avenge his death.
‘You know... Satoru? I controlled… everything in my life… but those… I love.’
Those escaped his domain.
‘Are you serious?’
Gojo is in the morgue, facing her, among the empty litters. He doesn't dare to look at her.
‘You shouldn't be surprised, he had a death sentence since—’
‘I know,’ she interrupts him. ‘So, where is his body?’
Satoru rubs his jaw, as if trying to cover his mouth.
‘I took care of him.’
Shoko purses her lips inward, weighing her words.
‘What the hell do you know about treating a sorcerer's corpse?’
Gojo has never heard her talk like that and, suddenly, he feels a weight in his stomach.
‘Look, I'm not stupid, I think I can do it by myself.’
‘If you don't do it right, his body can be possessed! I don't mess with your six-eyes shit, why are you messing with mine?’
‘I... I didn't know that. I…’
‘Everyone was right, you are so selfish! You go through life choosing for others, playing god, when you're not the only one who lost him, I lost him too! And now, because of you, I can't have my mourning!’
She lands her elbows on a litter and buries her face in her hands to cry at ease. She doesn't even mind being loud, her head has so much pressure it could burst.
Satoru approaches her with slow steps, as if erased. He lays his handkerchief at her side and speaks in a whisper.
‘I was his squire. A squire takes care of your body if you die.’
Shoko looks up and finds him crying silently. His expression is somewhere between grief and bewilderment and she has the strange feeling that they both are nothing more than the teenagers they used to be. Two lost kids dealing with a serious issue.
Without wasting another second, she hugs him.
‘You were, you were. I was there.’
Satoru drops his head on her shoulder and embraces her back as best he can.
‘I had to do it, Shoko. It's my fault he's gone.’
‘No, no,’ she whispers, as she snuggles him, ‘it was his choices that led to that. I'm sorry... how I treated you.’
‘But you're right, you and him. Now I see the problem with me but I don't even know where to begin.’
Although it's tough, she smiles.
‘You have a good start there. As for me, you can ask my opinion on something from time to time.’
‘Ijichi… Ijichi told me about your domain expansion. He was quite impressed.’
‘Right, I… barely remember.’
‘Let me see it… someday. And, uh... I have something for you.’
Breaking their long embrace, he gives her a lighter and a folded piece of paper. Suddenly, Shoko's gaze darkens.
‘Were they from him?’
‘Yes. I didn't read it, but I knew it was for you.’
‘Thank you. And I really mean it.’
Gojo nods and leaves quietly. Before she could decide whether or not to read Suguru's words, he's back.
‘How would you... express your feelings? I mean... what if I fail to be a better person?’
Shoko sighs deeply.
‘You can always start therapy.’
After dinner, Utahime goes to her room feeling tired. Only the first day of the Tokyo Goodwill Event and a lot was already happening: Sukuna's vessel is actually alive, three cursed wombs were stolen and most of the students are in the infirmary. Quite a bit.
Then, when she's about to go to bed, someone knocks. Her sleepless mind thinks it might be Shoko, probably wanting to gossip. So, she puts on a robe and goes to open it.
‘Oi... I know I'm probably the last person you expected to see—’
His words fade as he says them, like a car running out of gasoline. Utahime blinks twice, puzzled.
‘What now? Are you still speculating about the rat?’
Gojo uses his six eyes to check if anyone is approaching. It took him a lot of work to get up the courage to go there and he doesn't want to risk being seen. He doesn't want an excuse to back out.
‘Could I... could I come in?’
‘Can't it wait until tomorrow? How much more damage could they cause?’
Then, his higher vision catches someone about to take that hallway. It's that flying blonde girl, the one who doesn't know the conditioner. Naturally, he becomes panic-stricken.
‘Sorry, I must insist.’
Before she could react, Gojo gently grabs her by the wrist and crosses his forearm behind her back, as if they were going dancing. He takes a single graceful step forward, bringing them both inside. So, he breaks the contact as quickly as he started it and slides the door closed. Wide-eyed, Utahime blinks repeatedly.
‘What's... going on?’
‘Right, then. I need to ask you a question.’
Subtly, she rubs her hands together.
‘I'm all ears.’
‘Fine. So, what I want to know is... do you really hate me?’
‘I beg your pardon?’
‘I can't say it again! Do you or don't you?’
At first, Utahime scowls at him, waiting for him to admit at once it was only a bad joke. But the ticking keeps running and Gojo just stares at her. His eyes are no longer hidden and it's pretty hard not to hold his gaze. All glances lead to them.
‘Since when did you care?’
She doesn't want to be defensive but needs to make sure it's for real. If she opens up to him and he stomps on her feelings, she could end up holding a grudge. Real grudges.
‘It's complicated. But my therapist asked me if my actions are hurting—’
‘Come again, your what?’
‘My actions! Then I realized I don't know what you think of me. You might really hate me, that's why I ask.’
Utahime stays as if in a trance, processing his words. She doesn't know how long it takes her to answer him, probably an eternity.
‘I don't hate you, not really or fake. It's just… you're mainly a hard person to deal with.’
‘May I ask why?’
She sighs and closes her eyes. She doesn't need to open them for a while.
‘I don't think it's your fault. You were born... too skillful and... the rest of us can't keep your pace.’
Slowly, Satoru leans back against the wall.
‘I'm trying my best, you know? I even—’
‘What?’
He exhales loudly, nearly in a snort.
‘I'd gone six months without calling anyone 'weak,' I was going on seven.’
Utahime clicks her tongue and looks at him again. Gojo thinks she doesn't look angry, but disappointed.
‘Then you met me again.’
Satoru senses a sudden heat in his cheeks, as if they were burning. Instinctively, he raises a hand to his face. But he has avoided her long enough and now he just wants to face it.
‘Sorry 'bout that. Truth is... no matter how much I mentalize myself... I feel weird with you.’
Utahime hears the sound of her own breathing. It feels heavy, the air seems denser.
‘What do you mean?’
‘I... mean you... are not weaker than me. You're different.’
‘How different?’
‘You... are good at things... I'm bad at. Like teaching, I know I suck.’
‘So, why do you do it?’
‘I have fun doing so,’ he says, shrugging.
Something in her voice softens and her expression relaxes.
‘That's a good reason.’
‘I… my point is... I admire you. You don't have a student missing or injured every other month.’
She releases a short, sarcastic laugh.
‘Now I do.’
‘That's... my fault, they came looking for me.’
‘So, you done? Back to being self-centered?’
Gojo sighs. He's also exhausted.
‘I'd better go get some sleep.’
‘I… need that too.’
Satoru heads for the door while Utahime stays in place, looking at the floor as she nibbles her lip.
‘You know what I told... Suguru right after I met you?’
When she sees him again, she knows she can't hide her interest from his eyes.
‘Well?’
He grins from ear to ear. Bastard is enjoying it.
‘That you were my type.’
She barely notices her lips half-open when she shuts them quickly. So, Utahime tries to sound unaltered.
‘Doesn't seem so.’
‘Try it. Dinner together tomorrow.’
‘To hunt rats?,’ she asks, arching an eyebrow.
‘To hang out, like two grown-ups who can assume their desires.’
She blushes, she wouldn't have thought him capable of talking like that.
‘That... doesn't sound bad.’
‘I warn you'll need some patience with me. I can still bother you without intending to.’
Utahime rolls her eyes. Easy come easy go.
‘Why?’
‘'Cause you're cute when you're angry.’
‘Let me guess, that's funny too?’
‘Just a little. And I wanna hear about this, the whole story.’
Satoru smoothly slides his index finger over the bridge of her nose.
‘Who told you I'll do it?’
He smiles at her with that stupid look of the lovers.
‘Go easy on me. You're older and it intimidates me.’
His tone doesn't make her clear if he is joking or if he is serious. Utahime watches him walk away as she thinks of how she'd explain to her next day-self this wasn't her most delusional dream.
‘Geto?’ asks Shoko.
‘His body,’ Masamichi says, ‘that thing can use his cursed technique.’
‘I see. Nothing to do, then.’
Sighing, she reaches into her robe for a cigarette.
‘I thought you quit smoking.’
‘I'm just feeling... nostalgic about my student days.’
He remains silent, suspecting that he screwed up. So, from Shibuya station, the assistants bring them the corpses of fallen sorcerers. Shoko must treat them, make sure they don't come back. At that, the Principal gets a call.
‘I must go, Panda needs me,’ says Yaga and he leaves for good.
When she's by herself, Shoko gets to work. Everything is routine until two petite bodies catch her attention. They are unrecognizable, to everyone but her.
She knows they were Mimiko and Nanako, Suguru's daughters. She can tell by their clothes and shoes, by their blown cell phones, by their necklaces he gave them. And, although she's always surrounded by death, these two hurt her for real.
Some minutes later, she realizes that there's nothing left of Suguru: his body possessed and his legacy ripped away, erased, as if he never existed. Shoko wants to cry, but she can't because there's too much to do and she's alone.
So, her phone rings.
‘It's me, we are going to Tokyo,’ Utahime says.
Unconsciously, hearing a familiar voice comforts her.
‘Do you... do you have a long way to go?’
‘About two hours, why?’
‘Can we... talk? I know the world is falling apart, but—’
‘We can. The train won't go slower for doing so.’
‘So, I... I do love a guy.’
‘Do I know him?’
‘Yes.’
‘Where's he now?’
‘Gone.’
Utahime pauses.
‘His... hair, was it better than ours?’
‘How… did you know?’
‘You can't lie to a friend, they know us.’
‘So, Gojo—’
‘Don't! But... yeah.’
‘How long ago?’
‘Just this year. I was waiting to see you in person to tell you.’
‘I... must apologize... for not saying it sooner.’
‘Why?’
‘I was afraid you'd... judge me.’
‘He was mean to you?’
‘No.’
‘Were you happy?’
‘Yes.’
‘Done, then. I'm a teacher, not a cop.’
‘Thank you,’ Shoko whispers.
‘You know something?’
‘What?’
‘He isn't dead while you remember him.’
Hugging herself, Shoko nods and weeps silently. Although Suguru's possessed and Satoru sealed, Utahime's still there.
They still have each other.