Chapter Text
Adamska first met John when he was 21, still living with his mother, whilst he finished his studies. She brought a work colleague back, who’d lost his apartment due to the complex being torn down. Joy explained to Adam he’d be crashing with them until he got a place sorted again. He tried his best not to stare but he found it hard, John was strikingly handsome, gruff and strangely funny. Adam was smitten from the start.
Adam perched himself on the living room sofa, head tilted to the side, watching John as he talked. Despite Joy’s insistence he only had to keep the spare room tidy once it was cleared out for him in order to be able to stay he wanted to help. Even going as far as to offer to pay rent, which Joy turned down right away, calmly stating he’d need to save his money so he could get a place of his own again. “How about he gives me a lift to college?” Adam eventually pitched in, finally looking back to his mother. He lived at home and the campus was across the city, till this point either his mom would drop him off or he’d get public transport. Since they only had one car between them and Joy needed it to get to work and during work. John and Joy looked over at him, each raising an eyebrow at his suggestion. “He starts later than you right?” Joy nodded slightly at the question, she was always the first of her team at the office. “So if he drops me off that means less time waiting around in the morning for me and then he’s ‘earning his keep’ as he’s so keen to do.” Adam explained calmly, eyes never leaving his mother as he spoke. He knew his mom was trying to figure out if he was working an angle, it was hard for him to get anything by her. John was the one to break the silence that settled at Adam’s suggestion.
“I can do that.” Joy looked back to John as he spoke, assessing him silently as well before nodding.
“Very well, Jack you’ll take Adamska to college in the morning’s for me.” John nodded slightly and Adam barely held back a grin, Joy looked back to her son and shook her head slightly.
The room lapsed into silence once again, none in the room liked small talk, saw it as a waste of time and breathe. So just sat in silence, Joy pulling out her phone to check her e-mails, John sitting there awkwardly and Adam grabbing his book again, he’d been curled up in the living room reading before Joy and John arrived. Opening it up with gloved hands he started to pour over the words, losing himself to the text, even forgetting John’s presence for a time. That was till there was a weight beside him and a gruff voice broke the silence once again. “What that about?” Adam looked up from the book slowly, blinking a few times before looking back to the book.
“Psychology, that’s what I'm majoring in.” He smiled absently at the book, he loved figuring out what made people tick, why people acted as they did and get inside their heads. He looked back to John who nodded slightly. “Before you ask, yes it’s hard but I love it.” He smirked as the elder blinked in surprise before chuckling gently.
“People ask that often huh?” He asked tilting his head to the side. Adam snorted and nodded.
“Just about as often as ‘and how do you spell that?’” he heard Joy snort smirking slightly at her sons comment and grinned, it was part of the reason he struggled to get a job. They asked what he studied then asked how to spell it out, which he would, like he was talking to an infant. John raised an eyebrow and Adam waved it off, closing his book but leaving it on his lap as he turned to face John.
“You work with mom long?” He asked, tilting his head to the side.
“Since I left school.” Adam nodded slightly, glancing back over to his mother for a moment, reading her e-mails but clearly listening in.
“And that would make you how old?” Adam asked innocently, eyes returning to John.
“I’m 30 and you are…?” He trailed off, realising Joy had never said how old Adam was.
“21.” He stated simply, John nodded slightly, clearly thinking of what to say next when Joy spoke up.
“Adam, come help me set up John’s room.” She’d gotten up and moved towards the door, the two on the sofa blinked in surprise not having heard her move. A trait they all possessed, moving around silently. Barely holding back a small huff Adam got up, putting his book on the arm of the sofa.
“I can help.” John offered as he got up, blinking in surprise to see the two before him stiffen slightly.
“Won’t take long.” Adam said before disappearing down the corridor and up the stairs. Joy frowned and looked back to John.
“We stored Sorrow’s things in there…” she explained, though her face was blank bar a frown the sadness echoed in her voice. John frowned slightly, he didn’t know much about Sorrow, he didn’t even know his real name. He often wondered what happened to the man. She shook her head slightly turning back to start walking. “Come on Jack.” She said quietly and John nodded, following her to the spare room.
Pushing the door open reviled Adam packing clothes into boxes. Moving them from the basket they’d been abandoned in to a box to be sealed away. He looked up to see Joy and John before turning back to the box. Joy walked across the room to the desk tucked in the corner, the room had been a study for Sorrow as well as a spare bedroom, so it was the easiest place to store his stuff and close the door to stop the pain of seeing it. Picking up a box along the way Joy started shifting books, papers and trinkets into the box. John stood lost at the door before walking over to Adam, kneeling beside him to join in folding and putting away the clothes.
They worked in methodical silence, Joy and Adam knowing what the other wanted them to do with glances. John quickly able to catch on from working with Joy. With the three of them it wasn’t long until everything was packed away into boxes. Adam left the room silently, returning with bedding since the bed in the corner of the room was stripped bare. Joy nodded towards the boxes, eyes focused on John, who nodded back and picked one up. Joy picked up another and led him to the basement, between them they took all the boxes down whilst Adam made the bed for John. Once everything was taken down, John grabbed the two duffel's and suitcase he’d brought with him, with his stuff in and took them up to the room.
Slowly opening the door he saw Adam standing absently at the window, staring out the glass. “Adam?” John asked quietly, putting his stuff down and making his way over to Adam, gently putting his hand on the younger man's shoulder when he didn’t reply. Adam slowly looked at John and smiled absently.
“Hope you like the room.” He said airily before turning and walking out of the room, leaving John standing there confused as Adam slipped into his own room, locking the door behind him. John frowned and sat himself down on the bed. Whatever happened with Sorrow obviously hurt Joy and Adam, he didn’t want to push but he figured me might have to ask someone about it at work the next day.
Joy made dinner and set the table, John and her eating in silence as Adam refused to even open his door. Just stayed silent from the inside. John couldn’t help but feel a swell of guilt, if he hadn’t mentioned to Joy he was staying in a motel this wouldn’t have happened. When they finished Joy went to clean the dishes but John shook his head, taking the empty plates himself. “You cooked, I’ll clean.” She nodded, looking at Adam’s plate, still on the table before sighing, putting it on the side and going to her room. John washed the dishes thinking absently, trying to remember if he’d heard anything about Sorrow beside him being gone.
As he dried his hands he looked at Adam’s plate and frowned before shaking his head. He made his way up the stairs, pausing at Adam’s door and knocked gently. “Your foods on the side if you want it.” He let the young man know before going to his own room and shutting the door. In the silence as he pulled out his night clothes he heard Adam’s door open and the other make his way down the stairs. He spent the rest of the night reading in his bed before going to sleep.
The morning came too quickly and each went about their morning on their own, Joy and John getting into their suits and checking their schedule’s for the day, Adam making sure he had all his books and that he looked as good as he wanted to. Joy left first, patting John’s shoulder as he sat reading on the sofa and kissing Adam’s forehead as he checked his bag again to make sure he had what he needed. John couldn’t help but laugh at the huff Adam gave, batting her away as if it was embarrassing for his mother to kiss him. Still John noticed that Adam followed her to the door and gave her a hug and seeing her off before returning to the living room.
Adam flopped down on the sofa, head back, looking up at the ceiling. Slowly a smirk spread over his lips and he rolled his head to the side of look at John. “When do you start work?” He asked innocently despite the smirk on his face. John blinked in surprise but checked his phone anyway.
“In an hour, why?” He asked cautiously, watching Adam who laughed gently at the suspicion.
“Come on, there’s this great café near college. My treat.” He said as he jumped up, grabbing his bag and staring at John expectantly. John blinked in surprise before laughing gently, shaking his head fondly as he got up, grabbing his jacket and keys.
Most of the drive was quiet, John was focused on where he was going and Adam giving directions even if John didn’t need them seeing how proud the younger man was he couldn’t bring himself to not listen to him. They pulled up outside a quaint little café and Adam got out, bouncing on the balls of his feet, it was only then John heard the jingling of metal. Getting out as well he met Adam at the front of the car and chuckled to see spurs on his cowboy boots. Adam raised an eyebrow at the laugh and John waved it off. Adam huffed but led John into the café anyway. It was mostly empty, just a few people sitting at tables dotted about the place.
Adam bounded up to the counted and grinned at the woman on the other side, who rolled her eyes at him. “Usual cowboy?” She asked teasingly and Adam nodded before looking to John. “And for you sir?” she asked, her voice now polite and kind, John couldn’t help but grin at the difference, she was obviously a friend of Adam’s. John looked at the drinks board behind the woman before looking back to her.
“Black coffee please.” Adam raised an eyebrow at him and John shrugged, he liked his drinks rather plain after all.
John looked around the place, taking in the open and comforting décor as Adam paid for their drinks. “Take a seat, I’ll bring them over.” Adam nodded and gently touched John’s arm to steer him to a sofa at the side with a table before it, forcing them to sit side by side.
“You friends?” John asked, nodding towards the counter, Adam looked over and nodded slightly.
“With Sarina? Yea.” He smiled before looking back to John. “She’s almost as funny as you are.” He flirted and John blinked in surprise before grinning, not picking up on the flirtation.
“And she calls you cowboy?” He asked curiously, Adam nodded and grinned.
“Every time she sees me.” Adam replied, thanking Sarina as she brought their drinks over, a sly grin on her face. Adam peered into his mug to see ‘BF?’ written in the foam and snorted but quickly ruined the message by adding sugar to his drink and stirring it before John could see.
“So… You seeing anyone?” Adam asked innocently, keeping his eyes on his drink and took a sip once he finished speaking. John who had been bringing his mug up paused and looked to the other confused.
“No… Why?” He asked hesitantly, waiting as Adam swallowed his mouthful and put the mug down.
“You’re staying with us, would be nice to know if you’ll be bringing someone back.” He lied fluidly as ever and John nodded, accepting the lie as fact.
“What about you?” He asked in turn and Adam shook his head slightly.
“No, I’m still single.” He said casually before taking another sip.
“Can’t imagine why…” John murmured, Adam almost spit his mouthful out and forced himself to swallow only to end up coughing violently instead, covering his mouth with a gloved hand. John quickly took his mug from his other hand and put it down before rubbing his back, trying to sooth the coughing fit. Once he’d calmed down, Adam gasped out an apology, almost thankful for the coughing fit as his face was flushed for two reasons. John kept his hand on Adam’s back as the younger drew in steadying breaths.
“Sorry, went down the wrong way.” Adam muttered once he could speak properly. John shook his head slightly and let his hand slip from Adam’s back, the other missing the touch almost instantly.
They finished their drinks in relative silence, Adam too embarrassed to say much fearing he’d make it worse and John plainly worried about the other. Once they finished they got up and left, Adam walking with John to his car. “I’ll walk the rest of the way.” Adam said with a small smile and John nodded, reaching out to pat his shoulder gently.
“Need picking up as well?” He asked and Adam shook his head.
“Nah I finish before you or mom, I’ll make my own way back.” John nodded and let his hand fall before getting in the car, Adam stood aside and watched John leave, not starting to walk until he was out of sight. Stopping by a shop on the way to college he picked up a lighter and a few cigars, he’d seen some in John’s bag the day before and figured it couldn’t hurt, since Adam ruined their coffee together and the first night wasn’t very welcoming.
When he got home he crashed out on the sofa, laying on his back, looking at the ceiling for a few minutes. He fished the lighter out of his bag and frowned slightly. Without even realising it he’d started to try and court John, his mother’s co-worker, a man nine years his elder. He couldn’t bring himself to care though, he liked him and for Adam, that was enough. Slipping the lighter into his pants pocket he closed his bag, figuring he’d hang onto that since his was broken and just give John the cigars.
Slowly getting up he paused as he looked at the mantel piece, looking at the only picture left of Sorrow on display. One of the family, Joy sat with a young Adam on her lap, Sorrow with his arms around Joy, holding Adam’s hands. He smiled sadly at the picture before turning away and going to the kitchen, pulling out the ingredients to make tuna pasta bake.
John got back before Joy, whilst Adam was putting the pasta bake into the oven to bake for half an hour before it was ready to dish up. John paused at the entrance to the kitchen, watching Adam clean up after himself. He looked up at the elder once he’d put everything in the sink and grinned. “Have a good day?” He asked kindly as he cleaned his hands off and pulled on his gloves again. It was only then he noticed that Adam kept his hands hidden whilst he didn’t have gloves on but didn’t mention it. Instead he nodded slightly walking over to sit at the table as Adam grabbed two mugs, holding one up to John, who nodded again.
“Jo-… Your mom will be about half an hour right?” He asked Adam who laughed gently and nodded.
“You can call her Joy you know. I do know my own mothers name.” he teased, glancing over his shoulder. “If traffics good then yes, if not closer to an hour. You don’t mind waiting till she gets in to eat right?” He asked looking back to the drinks he was fixing up.
“Of course not.” John replied, accepting the mug offered to him. Adam grinned and sat down opposite him.
“Good.” He murmured and sipped at his drink before setting his mug down. “Oh, wait here a second.” He said with a smirk before slipping out the room and back into the living room. John stared after him confused but waited as told, sipping at his own coffee. Adam returned and put a box on the table before him. John looked up at him surprised, raising an eyebrow. Adam rolled his eyes and motioned to the box as he sat back down.
Slowly John put his mug down and pulled the box towards him, taking the lid off and blinking in surprise. “I saw some in your bag so I thought… you know.” Adam explained quietly, worrying at his lip as he watched John. John took one for the box, turning it over in his fingers before grinning, looking up at Adam.
“Shit Adam thanks, I’ve been needing more. Hell, these are my favourite.” John’s voice was as close as it got too excited and Adam couldn’t help the swell of pride and smiled now, leaning against the table, watching John.
“Well, go ahead then.” He motioned with his hand to the cigar and John blinked.
“Joy won’t mind?” He asked hesitantly and Adam rolled his eyes.
“She lets me smoke in the house.” John blinked in surprise as Adam spoke.
“You smoke?” He asked confused and Adam nodded.
“Rarely but yea.” He didn’t want to go into it but he tended to smoke when things got hard. Joy didn’t approve but she didn’t stop him, just like he never said anything when she’d drunk herself numb once a year.
“Got a lighter?” John’s voice pulled Adam from his thoughts and he nodded, glancing to John who had the cigar held between his teeth, reaching for the lighter in his pocket, he paused with a smirk and got up, walking around the table he lent down, pulling out the lighter and lighting the cigar for John, staring into his one good eye, far closer than necessary but enjoying the closeness none the less. John didn’t comment and shot Adam a thankful grin as the younger straightened up and went to a window to open it to let the smoke out.
They chatted idly whilst they waited for Joy to return. At one point Adam went up to his room to retrieve his ash tray, which was more often used as a paper weight. When Joy returned John stubbed out the cigar and moved the ash tray and cigar box off the dinner table as Adam served dinner up for them all, John setting the table for him. Joy raised an eyebrow as she entered the kitchen to see the duo working in tandem so easily and shook her head as she put her stuff down before taking her seat. They ate and talked about their days and true to Adam’s prediction, Joy didn’t mention the part smoked cigar nor the smell that lingered in the air.
Once dinner was over Joy started to clear away again but John stopped her like before. If they provided him with food then he’d clean up after as he insisted. Joy and Adam sat at the table to keep John company as he cleaned, carrying on the conversation. They all moved to the living room once the dishes were cleaned and put away. Joy started checking and replying to her emails, same as the day before, Adam sat on the sofa, book in lap and John sat at his side, reading his own book. Joy was the first to go to her room, since she started first and still needed to have a shower before bed. She again, pat John’s shoulder and kissed Adam’s forehead, who didn’t fight it this time, just hugged her with one arm before saying good night.
Adam glanced over to John once he finished the chapter he was reading and closed the book. “Want to watch a movie?” He asked, head tilted to the side. John looked up surprised before shrugging slightly. Adam laughed and got up, looking absently through the movies before grabbing a Western. Putting on the film he curled up on the sofa to watch it, John getting up to retrieve his cigar and the box along with the ashtray before settling in beside Adam. With a smirk and without having to be asked Adam lent close to John again, lighting the cigar.
They movie went by well, with John complaining about the techniques shown on screen. Adam couldn’t help but laugh at it but nod along, he knew the films to be far from accurate but he didn’t know John was such a gun nut, he should have expected it form someone in the security line of work. Once the film ended they went to their rooms, Adam doing some more studying before showering and calling it a night and John reading in bed, preferring to shower in the morning.
Over a month a pattern set in, John would take Adam to the café in the morning where they would have a coffee before going their own ways. Adam would buy John little things every now and then and give them to him later, always excited to see the reaction. Adam or Joy would make dinner depending on who got back first or what it was. John would clean the dishes. They’d all sit together doing their own thing, when Joy went to bed John and Adam would watch a movie, Adam lighting a cigar for John whilst they watched, before calling it a night too.
In that time Adam fell in love with John and took every chance to flirt with him and show off, not that the other seemed to notice of course. Much to Adam’s dismay. Adam even forgot that John was searching for a place of his own. It wasn’t until he woke up one morning and John had his bags with him in the living room that he remembered.
Freezing at the doorway, Adam stared and John and Joy who were talking, John thanking Joy for letting him stay with them and assuring her he’d be in work the next day after he settled into his new apartment. Adam just stood there in shocked silence, not even able to put on a smile as Joy looked over. Seeing her son look so destroyed, a look she hadn’t seen in so long. “Jack, how about you drop Adam off before going to your new place?” She suggested and John nodded. Joy left, kissing Adam’s cheek, who still hadn’t moved.
“Adam?” John called out to him and Adam stiffly hitched his bag up into his shoulder and went to the door, pulling on his boots. He wasn’t hungry anymore and didn’t even want breakfast, didn’t want coffee either but he followed John to the car, locking the house behind him. He sat absently in the passenger seat as John put his bags in the trunk and got in, they’d long since started talking on their drives to the coffee shop but this time it was silent.
Adam couldn’t hold back a bitter laugh as he got out of the car, it had started to rain, staring into space for a moment. He wrapped his arms around himself as he walked with John into the shop, nodding to Sarina and silently handed her the money for his and John’s drinks before sitting at their normal table. John trailed behind him, looking lost. Nothing was said till they had their drinks, John sipping at his as Adam sat in silence. “Adam? What’s wrong?” John finally asked, putting his mug down and placing a hand on Adam’s forearm, who yanked his arm away. Something he’d never done before, he always lent into John’s touches, found any excuse to touch him.
“Nothing.” Adam hissed out, curling up slightly. He knew John didn’t deserve his anger, it wasn’t like he realised how Adam felt and he never planned to stay long but it didn’t stop the pain Adam felt, the hole in his chest that he’d forgotten about with John around only growing.
“Bullshit, I know you kid, something’s wrong.” John realised only seconds too late he’d said the wrong thing as Adam turned to him sharply.
“You don’t know me! You don’t know shit!” He yelled getting up and running out. John sat there in surprise for a few seconds, staring after Adam in shock. A harsh slap pulled him back to reality, Sarina stood before him seething, her hand raised to hit him again.
“Go after him. Now.” She ordered, her usual teasing and friendly voice gone, he felt a shiver run down his spine at the tone. Instead she was harsh and cruel, words he never thought to associate with her. He nodded and got up, rushing out of the shop, looking around to see Adam turning off the street a small way away. He took off running in the rain, he got to where Adam turned and almost froze to see a cemetery.
John threw the gate open and ran in, eyes scanning the rows of tomb stones, looking for Adam. He found him at the back, kneeling beside a grave, his arms wrapped around himself as he cried. Slowly John approached Adam. Reaching a hand out for him, he froze when he saw the name on the head stone ‘Alik’ the last name had crumbled away but the message was still clear ‘A devoted husband and father’
John gasped, he remember reading about a Russian man, Alik whose son was kidnapped by the people trying to get to his client. He and his wife Joyce went in with the client to save their child. The client was shot in the leg but other than that was fine, the kidnappers decided to toy with the family instead. They had a gun on each of them and told Joyce she had to shoot her son or her husband or they’d all die. Alik told her to shoot him, they had no other choice and he knew it. He died to save his family.
Adam slowly looked up at John who stood over him and glared, harshly rubbing the tears from his eyes with gloved hands. “What?” he sobbed out, all anger gone. John slowly sank to his knees, wrapping his arms around Adam and just held him. Neither said anything as they knelt in the rain, Adam crying into John’s chest whilst John rubbed his back. "Don't leave me alone..." Adam whimpered, so quiet John wondered for a moment if he was hearing things.
"I'm not going anywhere." He relied soothingly, holding Adam closer still.
After an hour sat there John took Adam to his new apartment and let him clean up and dry off and sleep in his room whilst John unpacked, owning one more bag full of items than before, containing everything Adam gave him.