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Warmth surrounded him. Strange. Usually mornings were cold, now that is was well into winter, especially since his heater stopped working. He was used to waking up in the morning and reaching blindly for more blankets. Chris tried to shift. He couldn’t. Something was holding him down. Not rope, but… He jerked in surprise and got a face full of hair. A body was on him, what the hell? Opening his eyes, he saw a blur of dark hair. His brows came together in confusion. And then he remembered. Josh.
The brunette shifted in his sleep, his hand clenching even tighter onto Chris’s own. Oh. They were holding hands. Surprise heated Chris’s cheeks. Glancing around, he tried to search for his glasses, which was hard with only one semi-free arm. It took him a minute to realize that they somehow got pushed up on his head. With his free hand, he pulled them back on. The dark fuzzy room became slightly less fuzzy.
A large flat screen played some weird kids show. What the hell did Netflix put on? Chris glanced over at the digital clock on the bedside; it read 7:13 AM.
Josh sighed, rolling his head against Chris’s chest. Tired eyes softening, Chris dropped his head back against the pillow. What a night. Josh had called.
At one in the morning.
Startling awake, Chris blindly searched for his phone. His hand finally found the source of music and he squinted at the blurry letters on the screen. The coloring of the picture looked similar to Josh’s. With a grunt, he pulled the phone to his ear and mumbled, “Josh?”
“Oh… uh, hey… man. Did… did I wake you, or something?”
Chris pinched the bridge of his nose, “What time is it, man?”
“Past… oh. Past one.”
With a small smile, Chris rested his head in his arms. “Damn, Josh. You’re right. Why the hell would I be sleeping at one in the morning? I need to get my priorities straightened.”
“I… I’m sorry man.” Josh’s voice shook.
Slowly, Chris pushed himself up into sitting position. A frown pulled his lips and he tentatively asked, “Hey, Josh… is everything okay?”
A shaky breath. Josh cleared his throat. “Oh… um, look. Sorry for…”
“Josh,” Chris held his head in his hands, feeling his heart squeeze with uncertainty. “Do… do you want me to come over?”
Sniffle. “Oh, um, sure. That… yeah. Sounds good.”
“I’ll be there in twenty.”
“‘Kay.”
In the low lighting, Chris could see the outline of Josh’s face. Weren’t people’s faces supposed to look relaxed in their sleep? His was pulled tight with… worry? Guilt? Chris didn’t know. He sighed and let his eyes drift towards Josh’s mouth. The side of his face showing was the less scarred side, almost appearing normal if… if it weren’t for the circles under Josh’s eyes, and the pointy glints in his slightly parted mouth.
Josh’s mouth closed and frowned, and his hold on Chris’ hand tightened. The moment passed, and he seemed to relax an inch. Was it a nightmare? Or simply an unpleasant dream?
Well past one in the morning.
Even in his winter jacket, he shivered in front of Josh’s door. Instead of ringing the doorbell like a doof, he had called Josh to tell him he was there. It seemed to be taking hours for Josh to come to the freaking door.
Finally, it cracked open. A dark eye peeked out, and soon the door was open. “Sorry, for…” Josh began, his eyes falling to the ground.
Rushing inside, Chris sighed happily and welcomed the warmth. “Ah, man, one more second out there and my balls would be frozen solid.”
Josh’s eyes crinkled lightly. Oh. He was wearing that little white mask, which covered his mouth. And he was in a crinkled shirt and sweatpants. When was the last time he changed? Or went outside, for that matter? Josh shifted, seemingly uncomfortable with Chris’ stare. “Um,” his voice was slightly muffled by the mask, “I… uh, was thinking Netflix, maybe and… do you want popcorn? I can’t have any, but, uh...”
“You… you know you don’t have to wear that around me, right?” Chris mustered a smile. Even if he and Josh were supposed to be the same height, Josh seemed so much smaller. It must be the way he hunched slightly, with his arms wrapped around his frame.
“I just,” Josh reached up and picked at one of the strings, his eyes falling to the ground. “I…”
This was awkward. It was nothing like before. Chris felt caught between wondering if he should change the subject, or let Josh struggle with conversation, or what. Taking in a breath, Chris quietly said, “Josh, are you alright?”
The wounded look that Josh gave him was worse than any kicked-puppy look that Chris had ever received.
“No… not really.”
Josh had fallen asleep on him. Last night, after another terrible horror film, he was simply out. Like a light, or something. And Chris wasn’t entirely sure what to do. He knew he didn’t want to wake Josh, so, he just sat there and watched another movie. Eventually, at some point, he must have fallen asleep, too.
Letting his head roll against the pillow, Chris closed his eyes. A nightmare, Josh had said. And he said it meekly too, embarrassed that he would have such a “childish” thing, but honestly? Chris has had them too. He’s pretty sure no one left that mountain without baggage. Swallowing tightly, he sighed and stared tiredly at the ceiling of Josh’s room.
He didn’t ask what the nightmare was about. Mostly because Josh seemed so hopeless, and sad, and also because… he kind of didn’t want to know.
A part of him was afraid of the Wendigo. What if Josh’s good dreams were about snacking on some thick, juicy thigh? Or eating his friends? What would his nightmares even be about? Chris was being selfish, and he knew, but… couldn’t he afford to be a little selfish, just a bit?
Josh moved his leg, and Chris realized at that moment that this sleeping situation wasn’t just one sleeping on the other, but cuddling. Because, well, their legs somehow got intertwined. Feeling his face heat, Chris glanced down at his friend.
He slept soundly.
Soundly. What did that mean, anyways? Chris’s expression softened. Cuddling wasn’t too bad. Especially if it meant that Josh felt… safe? No. Grounded. If it meant that Josh felt grounded and, well, here, then Chris supposed he could “suffer” a bit more.