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There were nights when everything seemed really… heavy.
When everything was weighing down on Raine a thousand times worse than during the day.
Tonight was one of these nights.
They hadn’t slept in forever. Dealing with Terra today was exhausting. They’d been silently doing paperwork for the past few hours.
They were feeling like this a lot, lately.
Darius sighed next to them.
“We need sleep.” He mumbled, rubbing his temples. “Now.”
They tensed slightly. They’d recently been having a new series of stress dreams, all consisting of the plan for the Day of Unity somehow failing. If they were honest with themself? They were avoiding going to bed. Even though they were exhausted.
“You can go, I’ve got some more work to do.” They said.
“Songbird.” He said. “Staying up will make you less vigilant. You can’t run on a tired brain.”
They just shrugged. “Lemme finish this.”
“Raine…” he sighed. “Come on. I know you’re dedicated to this and all, but you’re a person. People don’t function well if they don’t take care of themselves.”
They didn’t answer.
“I’m going to pick you up now and carry you to your bed.” He said, more of a question than a statement.
They knew Darius was right. They needed to rest, their eyelids were heavy and being sleep deprived would only make their problems seem more overwhelming.
They just nodded, and he scooped them up in a bridal carry. They relaxed a bit.
About halfway out of the room, they blurted something out.
“Can I sleep with you tonight?” They asked.
He paused.
“I really don’t care where we sleep as long as we sleep.” He said. “Sure.”
“Thank you.” They mumbled. “I just… Don’t want to be alone, you know?”
Darius nodded, a sort of weary understanding to it.
He set them down on the bed gently once they reached his room, then climbed in himself.
The sheets were comfy, made out of something that Raine couldn’t identify. It was slightly cool to the touch, only barely noticeable though.
Interestingly enough, there was a large mural of a star chart of the ceiling. It was messy, with little notes on it in some handwriting they didn’t recognize.
Darius slung the blanket over himself, grabbed the pillow to his chest, and then laid down, clinging to it.
“Are you going to sleep like that?” They asked, a hint of teasing in their voice.
“Yes. It’s comfy.” He muttered. “Switch the lights off, yes?”
They did so, reaching for the lamp.
***
They’re standing on a platform, the eclipse high in the sky. They feel a comforting pressure on their chest, but everything else is agonizing, the same feeling as that spell Kikimora cast. Veins swelling, bursting through their skin, not a drop of blood in sight but so much pain.
Everything is so heavy, they feel like they're being crushed, and they sink to their knees, tears streaming down their face. Everyone knows everyone knows you’re not brainwashed everyone knows you're weak everyone knows everyone knows everyone can see you-
They’re in Terra’s greenhouse and they’re in Belos’s throne room and they’re in that forest and they’re being petrified and they’re on the platform. They’re dying and dissolving and turning to stone and wishing they were dead dead dead, just let them die already, they’re tired and they don’t want to do this anymore. They’re tired.
Darius collapses. Eberwolf. Everyone, one by one, sinks to the ground, nothing stops, and they feel panic and fear and a bone deep, unquenchable exhaustion. They’re about to die and they are terrified but at least they will get some rest.
***
They jolt awake, and immediately they realize there’s something holding them, they instinctively break out of whatever it is’s hold, and they realize-
Oh.
It was just Darius. He was holding them in their sleep. The pillow he was clutching is in front of their face.
“Whs going on?” He murmurs, stirring as they yank away.
“N-nothing.” They say, and their voice wavers. Dammit. Weak.
He opens his eyes, searching their face skeptically.
They’re not sure if he finds what he’s looking for, but he asks, “What’s wrong?”
“I don’t know.” They mumble, still shakily. “I’m fine. Sorry for waking you up.”
He nods slightly. “Apology accepted. Are you okay though? Really. You’re crying.”
They reach up to their face, and… yeah. It’s wet. They’re crying.
“Do you, uh… want a hug?” He prompts, slightly awkwardly.
Weak. Everyone knows you’re weak.
They shake their head, and lay back down on their side, facing away from him.
“Okay then.” He mutters, reaching over them to grab the pillow that’s on their side of the bed and lying back down. “What happened? You seemed upset.”
They shrug, curling in on themself as they pull the blanket up to their shoulder. “Stress dream. Day of Unity. You know how it is.”
He nodded, sighing softly. “Yeah. Yeah I do.”
“It’s nothing. Let’s just go back to sleep.” They muttered.
“I think it’s a fairly reasonable reaction.” He said. “It’s a… stressful situation, to say the very least, witches didn’t exactly evolve to cope with the strain of trying to stop a genocide.”
They chuckled. “Yeah.” They muttered. “We really didn’t.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” He asked gently.
“It wasn’t really coherent.” They shrugged. “Just scary.”
“Dreams do tend to be like that.” He nodded.
“It’s just…” They sighed. “Darius… what if we fail?”
He didn’t answer at first, thinking. After a moment, he exhaled and put a hand on their shoulder.
“We won't.” he said firmly, simply, as if that could solve anything. “We can’t.”
“What if we do?”
“Songbird, I promise you, we won’t fail. That’s just- it’s not something that we have the option to do.”
“We can, though.” They said, “You can’t promise anything, we could very well all die and everything could be for nothing and we could have dedicated our lives to a fucking lost cause-”
“Hey.” He said, squeezing their shoulder lightly. “It’s okay. We’re gonna be okay.”
“You don’t know that-”
“Maybe not.” He cut in. “But we can’t spend all our time worrying about it. We can try, and… and yeah. Sure. Maybe it won’t be enough. But worrying won’t do anything. It’ll just make us miserable. Er, more miserable than we already are.”
They didn’t answer, looking over at him for a while before slumping back down.
“Let’s go back to bed.” They muttered.