Chapter Text
Six thousand years.
Aziraphale and Crowley had known each other for six thousand years, and it feels wasted. The moment they met wasn't as special as the electric touch, well, at least that's what Crowley thinks. Crowley enjoyed any time on Earth when Aziraphale was there, but when he wasn't, Crowley felt nothing. Aziraphale wasn't as feeling. You'd think they'd be the opposite, with Crowley being a demon and Aziraphale being and angel, but no. Angels were usually forgiving, but they hardly ever loved anything else than another angel. Angels tended to love any angel they saw, knowing that angels were also loyal to God, but not in a humanly romantic way. When angels loved something more than angels, or, if to go far, God, it would be seen as unforgiving. Demons, however, could do what they wanted, as long as it didn't involve being holy or 'good'. When Aziraphale found out he loved Crowley, he wasn't so fussy at first. Because Crowley was an angel. And when he did fall, he imagined he lost feelings. But there were times where they met again, again and again. Pure coincidence.
But it wasn't. Crowley knew where Aziraphale was at all times, he had to, he had to stop his miracles. But that's never what he did. He always just bumped into him on purpose, to save him from trouble or to just have a chat. Aziraphale started to warm up to him, Crowley already had. But even when his chest felt warm and he felt safer than ever, Aziraphale pushed it down into the depths of his heart, to be concealed in cold blood, to be forsaken. It glowed in him, that love, but it was never released. And when Crowley finally told him (6000 years), Aziraphale couldn't let it out, even when he wanted to.
And when he was going up to heaven in the pearly white doors of the lift, he watched Crowley carefully, and Crowley watched him back (he thought, the dark shaded glasses Crowley wore were decieving, as you could never tell where particularly he was looking.) Aziraphale was frowning, but Crowley looked sadder. Crowley had a mix of anger mixed with love and sadness, a face you can't explain to someone who couldn't see it. Aziraphale felt sick. He closed his pericing blue eyes and Crowley snapped out of his stare. He opened his car door, and when the doors of said Bentely closed and the lift doors hit shut, Aziraphale opened his eyes and remembered.
-------
Aziraphale looped around the galaxy, it was a wonderful thing God had created, he was very grateful of the almighty. Aziraphale didn't exactly have a cosmic job, he was just a very lucky angel that God to zip around the galaxy, looking at the beautiful stars, shaping space dust with his wings and Aziraphale twirled in patterns, knocking stars gently so they bounced off of his robe (little did he know, he was shaping the way the galaxy was presented, and where certain stars and planets would be), Aziraphale turned, he gently held the small star upright, before smiling softly and continuing to zip around. He swiftly swirled, going as fast as what was going to be named 'light'. Aziraphale soared on his back, his eyes closed and laughing lightly. Suddenly, he heard a shout. He stoppded, now drifting, he saw a figure of an angel, waving to him. "Oi!" The angel exclaimed. And being a good angel, Aziraphale went to help, so he turned on his front, and swiftly flew over. "Yes? Was that you?" he had said, before the other angel shoved a scroll into his arms, and then Airaphale caught a glimpse as he talked.
The angel was beautiful. He had lovely, curly red hair, it floated in the cold air of space. Aziraphale's blue eyes glimmered, a shine ran through them as he gawked. The other angel's eyes were a deep, chocolate brown that he could get lost in. He had an accent.. well.. like an angel. He had a beautiful face structure, deep dips in his cheeks, dimples, light freckles and small wrinkles around his eyes. Aziraphale gazed. His heart thumped, but it didn’t thump like when he saw any other angel. This one was special. It felt loved. Suddenly, Aziraphale snapped himself back into reality, relising the other angel was waiting for a reply, he tried to avoid eye contact, looking off to the side. He held up the scroll. "Um.." he mumbled, not quite sure what the other angel had asked. "Which way up does it go?"
"No, no, no, just hold it tight, there we go."
As the other angel twirled the pipe into the scroll. Aziraphale continued to admire his face, getting lost in his eyes. He seemed like such a free angel, he looked like someone who didn’t speak the standard speech, someone who was not like any other angel.. "Alright, ready?" the angel said, looking up at him, in surprise Aziraphale responded flustered; "For what?" the angel heaved on the pipe a few times before letting go. "There you go, lovely." he grinned, still looking *not* at Aziraphale, which made his wings sink a little. "Thank you, you can put it down now." Aziraphale smiled, happily gently throwing the scroll to one side so he could continue to talk to the possible love of his life. "Is that it?" Hell, he didn’t even know his name yet. "Oh no, no, i’m just firing the engine!" Aziraphale stood confused, but it didn’t really matter what language he spoke, as long as he could gaze. "This is the fun bit." the angel said, turning to the void. "I’ve been waiting for this since.. well.. um.. always!" the uncertainty in his voice gave Aziraphale an idea to introduce himself, if he was going to make a move he may as well make it now. "Um.." Aziraphale continued smiling, despite his nervousness. "Hello! I’m.. Aziraphale!"
"Nice meeting you." Swiftly said the other angel, taking his eyes off of him almost immediately, leaving a heartbroken Aziraphale struck, he would never know his name. Aziraphale watched the other angel begin to chant, he seemed like an important angel, very intelligent indeed, Aziraphale fell in love again, even when he wasn’t looking at him. But nothing happened. He looked at him, hinting "Is something meant to happen?" the angel apologised. "Knew I’d missed one!" he exclaimed, this made Aziraphale chuckle. "Let there be light."
And for that particular angel, the world lit up, he squealed in excitement as the nebula he had created, all by himself, glimmered and puffed and whirled, he felt like dancing, but of course, angels dont dance.
As for Aziraphale, his world was already lit, he didn’t bother watching the nebula, he just watched this angel’s happy face, he saw how *geninuely pleased* he was, and he loved it. His eyes softened as he tilted his head and smiled. For a minute, he wanted to see what made him so happy, so he turned to the nebula, and well, it was beautiful.. "Ah!.. Good Lord.. Haha.." but not as beautiful as him.
"Look at you, you’re gorgeous!"
Aziraphale blushed. He turned to look at him, a smile shaping his face, but the angel’s eyes faced the nebula, Aziraphale felt himself get hotter, and he shamefully puffed out his cheeks and turned back to the nebula, embarrassed. "Er.. you made it all.. yourself?" he asked, to break silence. "Ah.. ah.. well." When the other angel turned, Aziraphale was still looking at him. "I mean more or less, I wasn’t- I wasn’t um.. wasn’t the original concept design, but i worked very closely upstairs with it." Important, indeed. "Well it’s very pretty." Aziraphale said, he didn’t mean the nebula. "Oh, thank you!" The angel laughed. "And I think you’ve done an excellent job." Thats when he meant the nebula.
And as the two stood there chuckling, thats where Aziraphale fell in love with an angel, and that angel, just so happened to be..
———-
Crowley. Now, Crowley was driving down the road at almost 90mph, the speed limit, by the way, and now he was exceeding it. As for Crowley, even though he loved to save Aziraphale when he was in trouble, and even though he loved to tease him and it looked like he loved him from the beginning too, thats not actually the true story. Crowley began loving Aziraphale, when he did something for *him*.
Crowley always thought that he was doing things for Aziraphale, saving him, helping him with magic acts, saving him again, and although Aziraphale was lovely, demons couldn’t bring theirselves to love, usually they didn’t, which is why the rule of ‘demons can love anything they want’ was put in place, because, before Crowley (and i suppose you could count Beelzebub), no demon had ever fell in love. But he had. You would think it’s because he gave him holy water.
In a way, it was, but it wasn’t that. It was the electric touch. Thats what Crowley called it. He thinks it sounds stupid, it sounds like a dance move of some sort, but it really wasn’t, it was when Aziraphale was giving him that holy water, Crowley’s fingers touched Aziraphale’s. It gave Crowley some kind of electric shock that zapped from his fingers to his heart. Suddenly he had felr butterflies in his stomach, and his heart was thumping loudly, his mind ached with questions and thoughts that be didn’t understand, it hurt but yet he felt so.. different. For the first time in history, his snake eyes, behind his glasses, expanded, into full, loving pupils, as he saw true beauty in Aziraphale, true kindess, and not some angel who cast him out, someone who truly cared for him, a friend, not a foe. He clutched the holy water, palms sweaty. He never usually felt nervous. Not around Aziraphale. Aziraphale advised him not to go hurting himself, and this just made his eyes get fuller. And when Aziraphale left. Crowley let out a big sigh. He let his eye shape go back to normal, and he shivered off those weird feelings.
At the time he just felt sick, it wasn’t as romatnic as it seemed, but afterwords, when he got to his apartment. He stood still in a room and looked up to the ceiling, and he *smiled*, wider than anything. Even if Aziraphale was an angel, he was loved! He could love Aziraphale! There were no ‘laws’ about loving angels, he could love who he wanted, he could do what he wanted, as long as he wasn’t the good one, and so he laughed, he laughed like there was no tomorrow, he laughed thinking that when the time came, him and Aziraphale could go off together. Run away. Live in a cottage with bookshelves and plants.
But of course, things aren’t always what they seem.
Crowley was in his Bentley, doing 120 on the motorway, it was surprising he hadn’t been pulled over, but as a demon, he could avoid that. As he drove, his listened to nothing but the engine and his sobs and screams of him, cursing himself out and stamping his feet on the pedals.
Aziraphale coped differently. He sniffled lightly on the way up to heaven, he had urges to press the imediate stop button and just go to where Crowley is and do his sorry dance, but he couldn’t. It was an opportunity he couldn’t pass up. He couldn’t believe Crowley passed it up. He started to doubt himself. Did he love Crowley, or just that angel he once saw?
Oh, but falling in love is such an enchanting moment. Nobody can avoid it. But everyone can see it. They had dined together at the finest restaurants, lended favours such as miracles and disastrous decisions. They did truly love eachother, but there was no guarentee a relationship between an angel and a demon could be perfect like Gabriel and Beelzebub, there has to be some sort of complication. They both think it’s all ended, they think thats the end of their story, its over, but, Crowley’s sunglasses are cloudy, and Aziraphale’s eyes are dull.
They just aren’t clear enough to see the future yet.