Chapter Text
Shaden isn’t gay. He really isn’t! ...Right?
Against everybody’s beliefs, Shaden really thinks that he’s straight. So when a girl asks him to be his boyfriend, he agrees, because that’s what any other straight dude his age would do. At least he thinks so. He’s never really been the experienced one in this type of subject, he’s a nerd after all.
All his classmates kept talking about how gay he looks, sounds, and acts, and lately it’s pissing him off. He'd rather die than admit that he’s gay, which he obviously isn’t.
…. until he meets him.
He feels like shit. So much so that when the lunch bell rings and he gets dragged away by his friends, he forgets his lunchbox, something that usually never happens.
It’s worth it. It totally is. Cause when he gets there, he meets a guy. An angel, probably, since as soon as the guy notices he isn’t eating, he quickly offers him food. Crackers, to be precise.
It doesn’t take long for him to learn the boy’s name, Ezekiel, or "Eze” as the others call him.
He sees the boy a couple more times over the span of a month. And each time he does, he’s starstruck. Starstruck by his beauty, by his skills, by how smart he is, by how lovely his voice sounds, everything about the guy enchants him.
And he still believes he isn’t gay.
Every single time, he finds himself in awe of the boy. And every single time he brushes it off as friendly admiration. Until his friend, Lianne, gives him a well-deserved reality check.
“You know we can see you love him, right?” she mentions while looking at Eze who’s running away with Gael, as they usually do “I mean, it’s written all over your face.”
Shaden flinches at the comment. That couldn’t be. He wasn’t gay. But it did get him thinking.
That night, all he could think about was her words. It was as if they had pierced through his heart with a shock of realization.
‘He... liked Ezekiel? It couldn’t be. No, they just misunderstood. That’s it.’
Still, he kept thinking. Until, when Gael notices and asks if he’s okay, he gives in.
“It’s just... I don’t know anymore. I was convinced I was straight, but then I met Eze, and I feel like just the fact he exists sends butterflies in my stomach and then Lianne made that comment about how you guys can tell that I love him and now I don’t know anymore.”
It sounds half like he’s actually saying something, and half like he’s just rambling on and on, but she doesn’t seem to mind.
“If you like Eze, go for it.” she responds in all honesty “No one really cares anyways.”
It takes some convincing and a couple of months of hard work to finally get him to admit he likes Ezekiel, albeit platonically.
One evening, the others decide to go to the shopping center. Shaden has no idea why he’s being dragged along, but he tries to enjoy the evening nonetheless.
At least until the girls leave him and Eze alone to go and get bubble tea. He has no idea what to say, but the silence is just so awkward that he forces the words out of his mouth.
“So uh, how do you like the evening so far? I mean I was pretty much dragged here against my will and I wanted to watch Jurassic Park at home but you decided on your own so I guess you must be enjoying this”
There he goes again, rambling about stuff people don’t want to know... he really should fix his habit.
Lucky for him, the boy doesn’t seem to mind.
“It’s fun! They kind of coerced me into going with them but I didn’t know you’d be here! I’m happy you came along!”
Those words sent a thrill to his brain. He was pretty sure a blush was creeping onto his face by now, since he suddenly felt so hot. He wasn’t sure whether it was embarrassment or something else lingering in his brain, but it felt like static crawling up his body.
To put it simply, the feeling was electrifying, in all the wrong ways possible of course, since, as always, he strongly believed that he wasn’t gay.
Then, after a quick minute, the others came back. Shaden wasn’t sure if he was supposed to feel sad or relieved that they weren’t alone anymore, but quickly rid himself of that feeling as they went on to the next shops.
He spots a couple of things, like that video game he’s been waiting for at the local Game Stop, or the next volumes he needed to complete Chainsaw Man, but over everything else, he notices the flower shop.
It sits beautifully at the corner between the H&M and the Sephora, ornated with a wide variety of flowers, from roses to orchids, and sunflowers.
‘Maybe Eze likes flowers’ Shaden ponders, before quickly shaking off the thought from his brain.
About 5 months later, he finally realized, after arduous thinking, that he was, in fact, gay (finally!).
It took him a grand total of 3 weeks to muster up his feelings and the courage to confess that he likes Eze to the others, who then went on and planned him a small party. Dumb, isn’t it? He expected it though, so he doesn’t mind.
What he does mind is the fact they invited Eze, who looks like he has no idea why he’s here, to the party.
He's panicking, because he ends up alone with the other in the kitchen doing the dishes once everyone is asleep. Their shoulders are so close he knows his face must be beet red, and the silence makes the whole situation so awkward he feels like he’s going to throw up.
Eze is the one to initiate a conversation, albeit not the one Shaden expected.
“So... what’s this party for exactly?” Ezekiel questions as they continue cleaning the dishes.
Shaden froze. What was he supposed to say? That it’s to celebrate him being gay? No way. Not to an angel.
“Uhh... I think they’re just doing one because they feel like it” is all that he can declare in the heat of the moment.
Thinking about it now, that really wasn’t the best answer. But the other boy takes the answer, and they go back to cleaning the dishes in the silence.
Sad, isn’t it?
It's only 2 months later that he finally decides to confess to his newly found crush. Can you guess who it is? Bingo! It's Ezekiel!
He decides to buy him flowers, beautiful sunflowers, from the same shop he spotted at the mall.
It’s about 4pm, and their classes have just finished for the day, when he asks Ezekiel to meet him behind the school, at the one spot he knows nobody will interrupt.
A couple of minutes later, he sees Eze out the corner of his eyes.
Panic starts rising in his chest. ‘Is this a good idea? Is he going to say no?’
But Shaden can’t afford to panic right now. He already made up his mind about his confession.
Ezekiel arrives at that moment, and Shaden just barely manages to give the other boy the bouquet of flowers.
Even if he’s surprised, Eze takes the flowers. “Thanks, but what are they for?”
Shaden stumbles over his own words, he’s sure his heart must be beating super-duper fast as he barely manages to utter his next words.
“W-will you be my boyfriend?” he questions the shorter boy, who then responds in a way Shaden would’ve never expected in all 16 years of his life.