Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It was an ordinary day in the funeral home. Perfectly ordinary. Except for the woman running from her life from several humanoid figures made of ash.

“Alright, then! Chase me!” The Doctor skidded around a corner, then whirled and soniced the door shut. There. That should confuse them for the moment. Now to get back to the TARDIS so she could figure out what the hell to do with these things.

Unfortunately, there was a lesson she still hadn’t learned: look where you’re going, not just behind you. She ran straight into another body and tumbled to the floor.

The body that tumbled to the floor happened was Harper Nash to acquaintances, Loss to their friends. They eyed the strange woman for a moment. Whether or not this person would be an acquaintance or a friend would be determined later. Right now something was chasing them and they were on the warm, hard floor. Well, they’d better get up. No time to lose when someone was being chased. “Are you okay?” they asked.

“Arms, legs, teeth, yup!” The Doctor sprung to her feet, extending a hand to help them up. “Seen anyone else in here? About yea high, vaguely humanoid, made out of ash?”

Loss reached out, taking the stranger’s hands. “Made of ash? No, I haven’t seen anything like that.” They frowned, turning around. “Well, I see something like that behind us. Run?”

The Doctor’s eyes lit up as she pulled them forwards. “Run!”

Discharge the electricity. They needed something to get rid of it. A circuit. They needed a circuit. Metal! They all needed to touch something metal. Either that or water. She was starting to come up with a plan. “Don’t suppose there’s a shower or a hose in here?” she asked. “Or perhaps a big all metal room? Oh! Or a metal table on wheels! That might do the trick!”

“Metal table on wheels? You mean a gurney?” Loss glanced towards a nearby room. “There’s a couple around there. You know. For the bodies.”

“Perfect!” The Doctor opened the door and disappeared, then came back out with a gurney. “I’m the Doctor, by the way. What’s your name?”

Loss paused at this. The Doctor. They’d heard and read about them, growing up on Gallifrey, and most of it wasn’t great. But the Doctor had transport, so they’d have to make the most of it. “The name’s Harper Nash, but you can call me Loss. It’s a nickname, don’t ask why.” The why, oddly enough, was simple. It was a shortening of their full name, but that name wasn’t human. And the Doctor mostly traveled with humans.

“Well then, Loss,” grinned the Doctor, swinging the other end of the gurney towards them, “help me zap the hell out of this ash.” She rushed at the figure, sliding the gurney sideways and slicing it in half. There was a flash of light and a crackle of electricity and the ash crumpled, dropping to the floor and releasing a giant cloud. The Doctor yelped, jerking her hand away from the gurney and sticking it in her mouth. “Ow! Lesson learned, don’t touch that while it touches them, you’re part of the circuit.”

“I could’ve told you that,” they sighed. “Are there more?” This was going to be a lot of cleanup.

“Oh, loads,” said the Doctor, grinning. “They’re what chased me in here.”

The door rattled ominously, ash beginning to seep through the cracks. The Doctor grinned, rushing back to the other room and pulling out more gurneys. “Right. We’ll line these up and push ‘em together. I’ll sonic the door, we push, ash goes poof.”

More. This would be a mess. And if Loss played their role well enough, maybe the Doctor would ask to go with them. So they got to work, lining up the gurneys. “What are they?”

“Energy life forms in the static electricity,” said the Doctor. “Were hoping to possess actual bodies, but they weren’t expecting modern funerary practices. So instead they got stuck holding a bunch of ash together.”

“There’s corpses here, too. Luckily, we’re in a storage room.” Loss pursed their lips. “Well, lucky for now. Not if they get in.”

“They get in, we zap ‘em. If they get past that, I want you to run, got it? I’ve got it from there. You should get out of danger.” Humans, brave, contrary, stupid humans rarely listened to her. She really hoped this one broke the rule and did.

Normally, Loss would’ve taken her up on the offer. They really didn’t want to face a rather angry pile of ash. But they really, really didn’t want to face an investigation. “I know this place better than you do. From my point of view, we both have a better chance if we don’t split up. Have you really never seen a horror movie? I’ve had a real kick for them lately.” They’d been on the kick since they died, but they didn’t mention that.

“This isn’t a horror movie. This is life. I’m dangerous, this is dangerous, being around me is dangerous. I’ll be alright. You shouldn’t risk your life.” The Doctor took a deep breath, getting ready to push the gurneys. “Once we let go of these, you run.”

“Fine, I’ll run,” Loss lied. “But you better have a plan.” They wanted to help and they’d done more risky stuff before.

“I’ve always got a plan! I’ve got plans within plans. I’ll be alright.” She had absolutely no plan. Always did work best under pressure.

“If I don’t see you in half an hour, I’m coming back. You better not blow up the place. My boss would be pissed.”

“Right. Explosion free if possible. Three, two, one.” The Doctor used her sonic on the door and then pushed with all her might.

Loss ran, but just to a bathroom. They had a failsafe if the Doctor didn’t defeat them. They could kill the creatures. If there were few enough, they might not even break a sweat. But that was only in an emergency. Loss was a weapon, and the Doctor didn’t like weapons. So they needed to hide themself. Which was what they’d been doing for three long years.

The Doctor was slightly backed into a corner. The gurney had cleared about two thirds of them. Better than she’d hoped for! Her sonic wasn’t strong enough to disrupt them. She didn’t have any long bits of metal and she couldn’t just try to zap them all individually by throwing things at them. So clearly here, the best choice was…

An ashy hand fell on her shoulder and her entire body flashed as she fell, writhing, to the ground.

Loss’s head jerked up. A scream. At least, they thought it was a scream. It could’ve been them hearing the pain of someone telepathically. They wondered if there was much of a difference. They looked around for something less harmful than a telepathic death pulse. The Doctor was hopefully still alive, after all.

There. An old industrial vacuum. Bingo.

They ran out, wielding the tube end of the vacuum at whatever ash they saw. Running towards where they heard the scream. Hoping that it was in the direction of the Doctor. 

The Doctor gasped, waiting for her vision to stop blurring and the spasms to fade. She rolled over and propped herself on one elbow, panting with effort. The room spun and dipped, she was seeing double, and every nerve ending was on fire. The Doctor staggered to her feet and paused there as she tried to get her balance. So what she could barely see or tell which way the floor was turning? She’d fought with far worse. Then she heard the sharp noise of a vacuum cleaner and whirled around, nearly dropping and cracking her head on the pavement again.

Loss was right. There was something wrong with the Doctor, and it didn’t look good. They vacuumed the creature up as much as they could, dodging the ones reaching out for them. “Doctor? Are you alright?”

“Yep! Just a bit of shock. It’ll wear off eventually. Great work with that vacuum!” Unfortunately, the vacuum might not hold them. Plan. She needed a plan. Electricity, circuits, conduits, bingo! She had a plan. See? Pressure worked! Well, got her shocked and technically the moment to breathe worked, but she was counting it as a win.

The vacuum was already shaking ominously.

“I don’t think we have long,” said Loss, looking about for something to defend themself.

“Battery,” said the Doctor. “D’you have a car battery or something lying about?”

“Why would this place have a car battery lying about?” Loss asked, incredulous. This was a funeral home, not a car shop.

“Find weird things in weird places sometimes. Oranges in dressing gowns, batteries in game shows, a bunch of Dalek bits in a pawn shop, a literal pocket universe because I left something in m’pocket too long. Any large battery of any sort?” Battery, wire, some way to lure all the creatures in. Maybe if she rigged the floor?

Loss thought about it for a bit. “No, no large batteries. But I do have an idea. A really dangerous idea.” They grinned. “I’ll just be a minute. If I’m not back, something happened.”

“Sounds right up my alley!” said the Doctor. “Be careful, yeah?” Loss really should’ve run when they had the chance, but she couldn’t say she wasn’t glad they hadn’t. Please, you silly human. Don’t get yourself hurt over this.

“I will,” said Loss. “Worst case scenario, they get shocked with moderately high voltage. Worst worst case scenario, they have to explain why their face changed. But the risk wasn’t that bad, in their view. Better than hostile aliens. They ran off, grabbing a scalpel and using it on a power cord for a fan. Exposing the soon to be live wires. They also grabbed a towel, better safe than sorry. They ran back, prepared to plug their contraption in.

The Doctor yelped and jumped back as the vacuum exploded, releasing swarms of ash and electricity that swirled and formed into one large, cohesive figure. Gurneys were all on the other side of the room. Damn.

“We can talk about this,” said the Doctor. “Whatever you’re looking for, whatever you need, I can help you. It doesn’t have to be like this. This is your last warning. You can let me help, or you can keep doing things your own way and wind up in a whole lot of trouble.”

The ash cloud didn’t seem to be listening.

Loss came back into the room, holding the dangerous contraption. They wrapped the towel around their hand with tape, making a makeshift insulating glove. “I have it.”

“Great! Perfect timing. Let’s see what it does.” The Doctor darted out of the way as the ash grabbed at her and backed up.

Loss plugged the contraption in, holding it with their insulated hand. There was something fun about wielding dangerous amounts of electricity. The cable would send many volts through whoever got in its way. “Stay back, or I’ll use it on you.” They had a backup plan if this didn’t work, but that would blow their cover, and they hoped to whoever was listening that it wouldn’t come to that.

The Doctor scrambled back, hopefully out of the way of whatever that was. It was odd being on this end of the stick! Usually she was the one running in with a cobbled-together gadget and yelling at her companions to get back.

Loss waved the thing at the creatures with barely-contained glee. The gadget dispersed the creatures, causing ash to fall to the floor. Finally, all of them were gone. “It worked!”

“Hah!” The Doctor cheered, pumping her fist. How d’ya like that, you great ash heaps!”

Loss laughed, then frowned. “This is going to be a lot of paperwork.”

“Paperwork.” The Doctor wrinkled her nose. “Lot of bureaucratic nonsense. Can’t you just sweep ‘em up, put ‘em back in the urns? Not like you ever get just one person in those anyways.”

“What if they try to test the ash for something in ten years?” asked Loss. “They can do that now. I saw it on Forensic Files.” They really had gone terribly native over the years. “I’m not getting in trouble over… aliens?”

“Aliens,” confirmed the Doctor. “It’ll be fine. Not much we can do about it anyways.”

“It’ll be fine for you,” said Loss. “You don’t work here. I’ll probably be fired.” They hoped she’d take the bait. Offer to let them travel.

“Well, there’s other jobs out there.” No more humans. She’d promised herself, after she’d dropped Yaz off. She wasn’t going to go all Time Lord Victorious, she was past that stage of her life. And humans around her got hurt, either by the universe or by her. It was irresponsible and she was done. But then, they had saved her life…

“I’ll probably be back working at Taco Bell,” Loss lamented, before coming up with even more enticing bait. “With this job, I was able to save up. I want to travel, you know. Now that’s gone.”

Damnit, they were using all the right words. One trip. She’d take them on one trip. See if she could get them a little money or something while she was at it, get them settled. One trip to make up for all this trouble. Couldn't hurt, right? 

“Well,” she said reluctantly, “I can take you on a trip. But it could get dangerous. Like it did today, but worse.”

“Oh, I don’t mind the danger.” Loss minded the danger a little. But it wasn’t much more dangerous than being an alien hiding on Earth, or their life back on Gallifrey. “I’d like that, a lot.” They pictured themself reeling in a Doctor-shaped fish.

“Right, then. Ship’s just around the corner. I think. May have got a bit turned around. Look for an old police box.” Her favorite part was coming up. It never got old.

Loss was rather familiar with TARDISes, they had one once. Loss was also rather familiar with the fact that humans would have no idea about dimensional engineering. Loss found it rather quickly, as TARDISes are rather unique telepathically, and they could just brush up on every consciousness until they found the right one. “Is this it? It looks rather small.”

“That’s it!” The Doctor grinned, opening the door and stepping inside. She took a deep breath, feeling the familiar hum settle around her, then turned and eagerly awaited Loss’s reaction.

Loss took a step into the TARDIS. It was old, very old. Ancient. It was beautiful. They looked around in wonder, for very different reasons than the Doctor thought. The TARDIS was a beautiful antique, rather deviant from the usual look of a TARDIS with its crystals and being stuck on one setting. It reminded them of the Hyundai Pony they drove to work. Oh, right. They needed to show confusion. “Is it a magic trick?”

“Nope!” Her grin widened, waiting for them to say the thing.

“Then how is it more spacious on the inside?” they asked, feigning confusion. They were good at this.

Well, that was close enough! The Doctor adjusted the controls. “It’s a pocket dimension. The outside is just the gateway. Now then, Loss. If you could go anywhere, anywhere in the universe, past, present or future, where would you go?”

Loss thought about it for a moment. Anything to get off Earth, they’d been stuck there long enough. “Anywhere in the universe? Like other planets?”

“Loads of ‘em. Tell me what you’re looking for and I’ll find a place.” Somewhere safe, please. No more lost humans. She didn’t mind a bit of danger, but she wasn’t losing more people.

“Adventure,” said Loss. The Doctor liked adventure, right?

Damnit. She should’ve expected that. The Doctor hid a sigh. “Right. Adventure. Hmm, let’s see… raxicorocophalapatorious… no… that one amusement park planet was full of cybermen… nope, that one’s out-” Why was every planet she went to deadly?

“We could go somewhere on earth, if you’re struggling to come up with an idea,” said Loss. “And some when, I guess.”

“I’ve got it! Poosh! Nice bit of fun, Poosh.” The Doctor spun around, flipping switches and steering the TARDIS towards the planet. “Lost their moon once. Found it with a bunch of other missing planets.”

“I think I remember that vaguely,” said Loss. That was a lie, but they were aware of it when they were hanging out at a coworker’s house back when they worked at Taco Bell.

The Doctor wasn’t listening. “No, no, no…” she muttered, frantically flipping switches. “No, come on, not now old girl, come on.”

Loss really would’ve loved to help. But that would blow their cover and that wouldn’t do. So they stood there, worried. “I’m sorry,” they whispered to the ship before bringing up their voice. “Is something wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong! Everything’s fine!” The Doctor stretched her arm out to hold one switch while hitting another with her foot. “Just- a bit of turbulence! Fasten your air trays, put up your seatbelts, all that.”

Well, that confirmed it. Loss braced themself as much as they could for a crash landing.

“Come on, old girl, stick with me…” They were going to crash. Nothing she could do about it. The Doctor gripped the console tight and took a deep breath. “Alright. Turbulence is bigger than expected. About planet sized actually. Hold on tight, Loss!”

The console room spun around her and she couldn’t help but let out a whoop of laughter. There was something exhilarating about the crash. The drop in her stomach as they plummeted, the adrenaline and the dizziness, the knowledge that she had no idea where or when she was or what would await her when she opened the doors. If only she didn’t have to take care of the human.

Her grip on the console slipped as the TARDIS collided with the earth. The Doctor felt herself sliding across the floor, then nothing.

Chapter Text

They were definitely crashing. That was all Loss thought before they landed on the ground. The Doctor has to be in worse shape than I am, they thought. With the adrenaline coursing through their system, they didn’t feel their own injuries. “Doctor…” they said, their voice shaky. They needed to get out of there. The TARDIS needed to repair. They would drag her out, if needed. But they were still worried at the lack of response. “Doctor!”

Someone was shouting at her. The Doctor dragged herself up, hissing at the pain in her head. The room dipped and spun about her like a carnival ride under her feet. “H’llo?” she gasped. Someone had been with her. What was their name again…

There was a knock at the door. “Hello? Is anyone in there?”

They needed help. They desperately needed help. Loss’s body was starting to hurt, but that didn’t stop them from offering a hand to the Doctor. “We’ll be out in a minute!” they yelled. “Doctor, we need to go.”

The Doctor squinted at the figure in concern. She could vaguely make out olive skin, long brown hair, and a yellow shirt that was rapidly turning a reddish-orange. “Don’t think there’s s’pposed to be that much red outside your body. Think the red’s s’pposed to be on the inside.” She took their hand and clutched it, the pain and spinning increasing as she struggled to her feet. “Knocking. Knocking good. Knocking bad? Knocking maybe. If we open that door and I get a diamond planet I’m not going to be happy.” She frowned, looking over at the person. “Sorry, what was your name again? Something… hospital? No, that’s not right. It’s not Hospital. We just met there ‘cept it was a morgue. I’ll get it. You’re… ugh, m’brain’s like scrambled eggs.”

“Don’t worry about my name, we need- woah.” Loss was feeling dizzy and the room was spinning. They looked down and hissed. That was a lot of blood. “We need to go.”

They limped out of the TARDIS, supporting each other. Once they were outside Loss promptly collapsed into the arms of a young man with ginger hair and gold-framed glasses.

“Well,” said the man. “That’s not ideal.”

Ginger! She’d always wanted to be ginger. This seemed like a nice chap, even if he was a bit sideways. Or was she sideways? Nevermind! Loss needed help. Right. That was their name. Loss. “Help them,” she whispered. “Please. I can’t help while everything’s this spinny. You’ve got to help them.”

Humans were fragile and that was a lot of red. Or was it orange? Hard to tell.

“Here,” said the man. He picked Loss up, shrugging the Doctor off when she tried to help, and placed them on his sofa. “That’s better. And you, you should sit.”

Loss groaned faintly. All they could think about was how much everything hurt. They made a sound, but it wasn’t speech.

“They’ll be alright, won’t they?” The Doctor ignored the man’s suggestion, hovering near the sofa. If she’d seriously hurt or killed this one in that short span she’d never forgive herself.

The man leveled him with a firm stare that seemed oddly familiar. “You’re white as a sheet and you look like you’re about to drop. Sit down before you bang your head again and let me get to work.” He focused on Loss, gently moving their shirt up. “Sorry about this. I have to control the bleeding.”

There was a deep gash on their side. It wouldn’t have bleed as much on a human, but it was bleeding a lot. “Please,” Loss whispered, their voice barely there.

The Doctor groped for a chair and sat down, nearly missing it. She watched as the man pulled a kit off the shelf and pressed a thick pad of bandages to the wound, applying pressure with one hand and taking their pulse with the other. It was weak, but that wasn’t the remarkable part. There were two pulses. 

Aha, thought Romana. So this is the Doctor. I should’ve known.

“Doctor…” whispered Loss. “You’re hurt.”

Oh. Or not. They’ve found another friend. He hadn’t known how many of them had survived the War. Which was… something he’d been avoiding processing for the last century and he was not about to start now. “You need to stay still,” he said. “You have a bad cut and I need to stop the bleeding. Doctor, name every animal you can think of that starts with the letter N.” Hopefully that would both distract her and give him a sense of how concussed she was this time. Honestly. That man.

The Doctor flashed Loss a wan smile. “I’m alright. Don’t worry. Mr. Uhhh… don’t remember if I got your name… ginger here’s going to take care of you.” Animals that started with N. Narwhals. Nudibranchs. Nautilus.

“I don’t think we got a name, Doctor,” murmured Loss. They stopped moving, but they were still concerned. The man must’ve realized they weren’t human by now, and that caused a bit of panic.

Romana resisted the urge to roll his eyes. “Out loud, Doctor. My name’s…” an impish grin spread over his face. “Fred. My name’s Fred.”

Fred. Why did that name sound familiar? Ah right. Aloud. She was supposed to be saying this aloud. “Narwhals, nudibranchs, newts… knew a newt once, nice chap… neverbeast… no, that one’s not here… nautilus…”

They were fine. Romana turned his attention back to Loss. “I’m going to have to stitch this up once the bleeding stops, alright?”

“It’s alright,” Loss murmured, consciousness starting to slip again. It was getting harder to stay awake and their body wanted so badly to sleep. But the Doctor would recognize a healing coma for what it was and they needed to keep up the pretense as long as they could.

The Doctor was fidgeting again and if he didn’t give her something to do she’d find something and he wouldn’t like what it was. Romana sighed, gesturing her over. “Doctor, come here and put pressure on this cut while I gather supplies. Shout if it bleeds through again. I’m going to get some fluid replacement.”

She stepped forwards, pressing firmly on the bandages. “You’ll be alright,” she whispered. “Promise.”

Loss was losing the fight for consciousness. Their eyes flickered closed.

“Hey, hey, no, stay with me.” The Doctor cupped their cheek with her free hand, concern shining in her eyes. “Look at me, yeah? I’m sorry. I’m sorry I got you into this. I’m so sorry. But it’s going to be alright. You’ll heal up and I’ll take you wherever you like. We can see the universe. There’s so many things I can show you and we’ll have some fun and yeah sure some danger along the way and please, just… stay with me.” She kept pressing on the wound with one hand, stroking the hair out of Loss’s face with the other. “I’ve got you. It’s going to be alright.”

Same old Doctor. She hadn’t changed a bit. Romana busied himself grabbing supplies. He retreated to his long-unused medbay for the moment, grabbing IV apparatus, suturing supplies, and fresh bandages. He piled everything on a cart and rolled it out, along with the IV pole. “Alright. Now that the bleeding’s stopped, I’m going to get some fluid into you. This’ll only hurt a bit.”

Loss nodded, their eyes opening again. “I’ve been through worse.” They’d been through far worse. Died twice, in fact. But they couldn’t say that in front of the Doctor.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that.” The Doctor moved to the side, taking Loss’s hand and squeezing it. “Doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt now.”

Romana worked carefully, inserting the IV into Loss’s arm and starting the flow of replacement saline. “There. I’m going to start cleaning and suturing now. I have some local anaesthetic or something stronger.”

Fuck. Anasthetic. Human stuff didn’t agree with Time Lords. “No anaesthetic,” they said, clearly worried. “I’ll manage. I’m allergic.”

Romana gave them an understanding nod. “Don’t be shy if it hurts. Swearing helps immensely.”

“I know it’ll hurt.” said Loss. They’d patched themself up more than once in a previous life.

The Doctor didn’t let go of their hand as Romana set to work. He carefully removed some debris, added a bit of topical analgesic, and sewed the wound shut. Finally, he applied some moisture and fresh bandages. “There you go. I’ve got some pyjamas and we can get you out of those bloody clothes. Then you can get some sleep.”

“I’d like to sleep,” said Loss, their exhaustion plain. They weren’t quite planning on sleep but maybe, just maybe, if the Doctor was occupied, a healing coma could pass for sleep. They winced, trying to sit up.

“Nope, too soon for that.” Romana gently pushed him back down. No wonder the Doctor had found this one.

“I thought you offered pyjamas…” they murmured.

“I’m going to bring them and one of us will help you. Your choice.” She stepped out of the room to fetch them.

“How are you feeling?” asked the Doctor, stroking Loss’s hair back.

“I could be better. How are you feeling?” Loss gave them a slight smile.

“Don’t worry about me, I’m always alright. Still a bit spinny but it’s kinda fun.” Her smile wavered a bit. “I’m sorry about all this.”

“I’m sorry,” sighed Loss. “I should’ve been more careful and stayed away from sharp objects. I might’ve fallen back home and wouldn’t have landed here.”

“We’ll go anywhere you want after this, yeah? I promise. Once you’re all fixed up and I get the TARDIS running.”

Romana returned with a pile of blankets and pyjamas. “Doctor, I’ll want a look at your head after this. Now, Loss, whose help do you want?”

“Yours,” said Loss. They’d rather risk questions from “Fred” than risk the Doctor getting a closer look at the wound.

The Doctor began to examine the room, giving them space.

“Thank you for your discretion,” whispered Loss as Romana helped them change.

He nodded. “She doesn’t know, does she? That you’re not human.”

Loss shook their head. 

“You don’t have to tell me. Just rest, for now.” He had to get that story later. Trust the Doctor to end up in this situation. Speaking of which, he needed to make sure he wasn’t hiding a worse injury than the concussion. He turned around, only to find her with an open jar in one hand and the other in her mouth. She froze, looking like a kid who’d gotten caught in the candy jar.

“Really?” Romana crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow. She really hadn’t changed.

“I had to know what it tasted like!” said the Doctor defensively.

Loss laughed, then immediately regretted it. They’d probably have done the same if they were able to walk.

“You’re lucky that was just jam and not something worse!” spluttered Romana. “That could’ve been arsenic.” She took the jar out of her hands, returning it to the cupboard and locking the door. “I’m guessing safety is not what you’re a doctor of?”

Loss looked forlornly at the closed door. They wanted to know what arsenic tasted like.

“There was only one way to find out!” protested the Doctor. “Besides, you’re the one with arsenic lying about, not me.” She staggered, then righted herself. Floor kept trying to tip out from under her, which was very rude of it.

“Sit down before you fall.” He sighed, tugging her into a chair. He’d forgotten just how stressful she could be.

“Fine.” The Doctor sat, crossing her arms. “I’ve got some questions, Fred. The air tastes like the 1700s and some of the furniture and materials backs that up, but some of it is completely anachronistic. You’ve got 21st and 24th century equipment in here. What’s more, there’s a Starfleet certificate on your wall and one from Gallifrey. Who are you, and what are you doing here.”

Romana cursed under his breath. He really, really didn’t want the Doctor to know who he was at the moment. There’d be tears and explanations and he’d forgotten just how much she could be. “I’m no one in particular. Just someone trying to live out my life away from them. I’m sure you know what that’s like.”

“Is Fred even your real name?”

She leveled her with a stare. “Is Doctor yours?”

“You’re a Time Lord.” 

“And I’m perfectly happy living here, away from all their mess.”

Oh. Oh, no. The Doctor’s face went grim as images of the war flashed through her mind. The last time she’d seen it, Gallifrey was once again a burnt out husk. This person, Fred, they might not know. Might not realize that they were one of the last that existed. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I’m so sorry.”

Damnit, not that face. The sad, guilty face that she always wore when blaming himself for something that was absolutely not his fault. “It’s alright, Doctor.”

“Did you… did you hear? About what happened?”

Romana nodded, not looking at her. “I heard. I felt it.” I was in it.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” She couldn’t bring herself to say more. Not with the room dipping so much that it was no longer pleasant. She stared at the floor, which seemed oddly far away while her hands didn’t quite look like they belonged to her body. 

“It’s alright. It’s not your fault. Here.” Romana gave her a hand up, intending to settle her on the other sofa, but the Doctor was tottering over to the TARDIS the moment she was on her feet. “No- where do you think you’re going?”

“Hm?” She turned, not quite looking at him. Her face was pale and her eyes unfocused. “Oh. Just thought I’d bed down in the ship for the night.”

“Absolutely not. You’re staying where I can keep an eye on you.” He guided her to the other sofa, draping a blanket over her. “Goodnight, Doctor.”

“Mm.” She curled up, pulling the blanket snuggly around her chin. Loss was already out for the count.

The Doctor didn’t sleep well that night. Everything was filled with ash and flames and screams and that girl who had died because she didn’t trust the timelords. Dreams of explosions and exterminations and the Master’s laughter and a big red button under her fingers, waiting for her to press it and end it all. Rose was looking at her, disappointed. Behind her was a line of her friends and she could see in their eyes just how much she’d let them down. Then the Master was pushing the button before she could and Gallifrey was gone again.

She awoke with a start, gasping. The throbbing in her head instantly brought her back to reality and she groaned, raising a hand to it. Loss was still asleep across from them. Good. And Fred… was not. She could hear them faintly in the next room, no doubt getting breakfast ready. The Doctor sighed, climbing to her feet. She really, really didn’t want to have this conversation. But he deserved to know he was one of maybe three Time Lords left alive.

Loss began to stir. They almost panicked when they realized they weren’t in bed in their shitty apartment, before remembering the events of the previous day. And remembering why their side ached. “Good morning,” they said, looking across at the Doctor.

“Good morning.” The Doctor gave them the best smile she could muster. “How’re you feeling?”

“Better.” They smiled back. “Still hurts, but not as much.” They sat up before the Doctor could stop them, wincing. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m alright.” She wasn’t. She didn’t feel like sorting out what was because of the concussion and what was because of the nightmares.

“This place is nice, for the past,” said Loss. They knew exactly when in the past it was, but if they said that it’d blow their cover. They took a look around the room and noticed the anachronistic certifications, which raised an eyebrow. They couldn’t comment on Gallifrey, but… “Starfleet?”

“Humans discover space travel in 2063 and they make contact with the Vulcans for the first time. Starfleet is sort of their space navy. They’re mostly focused on science, research, and humanitarian things but sometimes things get dicey.” 

“Which means Fred is from the future?”

“He’s a Time Lord, like me. He travels through time and space but he’s settled down here.” He’s one of the last.  

A bit of hope was starting to struggle in the Doctor’s heart. Maybe if Romana nad decided to just settle down somewhere, others could have as well. She squashed that down quickly. That was a dangerous hope, one that could drive you mad.

“Right.” Loss wondered briefly what the chances were that they’d crash land in the house of another Time Lord, and looked at the ship in the middle of the house. Ah. She must’ve been responsible.

The spinning was starting to return. The Doctor closed her eyes and leaned against the wall, enjoying the sensation of the earth bucking under her feet and letting it carry her away for a moment. Away from thoughts of Gallifrey and the Master and everything that had gone wrong.

“Are you okay?” Loss frowned, noticing the way that the Doctor was leaning on the wall. They prepared to get up, not concerned about their own condition.

“I’m alright,” she murmured, not opening her eyes. She didn’t notice when she started to slip sideways.

“Doctor!” Loss jumped up, forgetting they were injured. They ran to the Doctor, trying to support her. Hopefully Fred would come in and wouldn’t be disappointed in ruined pyjamas.

“Fred” hurried into the room at the sound of the call only to find Loss out of bed and the Doctor leaning against them, both of them horribly pale. He wasn’t disappointed in the pyjamas. He was disappointed in the Doctor. Oh god. They’re both like this. I have two of them now.

“Please relax,” he groaned. “Sit down. Breakfast is almost ready.” He guided the Doctor into a chair.

The Doctor cracked open her eyes. The spinning had doubled and everything was a bit blurry, but she could still make out Loss standing over her. “Loss? What’re you doing up.”

“I thought you were going to pass out,” said Loss. They held a hand to their side, sinking into another chair. “I’d enjoy breakfast.”

“It’ll be ready soon,” said Romana. “Stay put. I’ll need to take a look at your sutures in a moment. Would you like some tea?”

“Tea sounds lovely,” said the Doctor, smiling faintly. “Might be just what I need.” Jackie Tyler and her tea. She missed Rose. Even missed Jackie. People thought that her companions came and went and she scarcely remembered them, but she did. She remembered every one. Not a day went by where she didn’t see something and think how hard Ian would’ve laughed at it or heard Vicki’s voice or saw Sarah Jane’s smile or Charley’s defiance or felt Rose’s warm hand in hers. She’d been running for so, so long and she was grateful for everyone she met but it hurt so much when they were gone.

“I’ll take tea,” said Loss. They preferred coffee, but they were far too tired to ask for it.

Romana glanced out the window. “How about we eat in the garden today? It’s a lovely day for it and the fresh air might help you two.”

He needed to talk to Loss. Figure out what was going on there. They’d met enough evil time lords in their time and he had to vet them, make sure the Doctor was safe. Well, as safe as he ever was.

“I think I’d like that,” said Loss. 

“I’ll help you outside and get you settled. Doctor, can you watch the stove? There’s a chair in the kitchen, make sure you sit. ”

She nodded, making her way to her feet and heading for the kitchen.

Romana carefully wrapped an arm around Loss, helping them to the garden. He eased them into a chair and pulled their shirt up, examining the mess they’d made.

“The Doctor thinks I’m human,” said Loss, allowing them to help. “I’d like to keep it that way. For both our sakes.”

Romana gave them a cautious look. “That’s your call. I won’t tell your secret. But I do want to know who you are and why you’re hiding.”

”I’m just someone who ran away from home, who was chased away from home. Not a criminal, only a renegade out of necessity. I’m hiding from her because I’ve heard she hates Time Lords. And I’m tired of Earth.” Loss hoped these answers would be enough. They didn’t want to talk about the War, and being ex-CIA would make anyone suspicious.

Romana’s eyebrows shot up. “Hates is a strong word. She… dislikes Gallifrey. But she doesn’t hate all time lords.”

“Oh? I thought… she would hate me though. If she knew the truth. She’d leave me behind, and I can’t have that.” 

“She probably won’t. She’s… well, you can’t believe everything Gallifrey says.”

“I know. Learned the lesson the hard way. But she… what if she sees me and sees everything she hates?” 

Romana studied them for a moment. Loss seemed sincere enough. But you never knew. “Somehow, I don’t think she will.”

There was a crashing sound from the kitchen and he groaned, climbing to his feet. “Don’t move. I’ll get her and bring her out here. With breakfast.”

“I’ve moved plenty enough for today, Fred.” Loss said. They were plenty worried about the Doctor, and as much as they’d like to help, they’d only distract from her.

“Good. At least one of you has some sense.”

He stepped into the house, returning a few minutes later with the Doctor in tow. She was looking dizzy and very sheepish.

Romana watched them as they ate breakfast together. The Doctor looked so much older than when he’d last seen him. There was a sorrow behind her eyes that hadn’t been there before. She looked hollowed out and broken and a part of him wanted to reach out. A larger part of him wasn’t ready. Still didn’t want her to know. The war hadn’t been kind to either of them and he wasn’t sure who he was anymore. And Loss… he still didn’t know what to make of them. They seemed genuine enough, but they were still hiding something. But again, they were a Time Lord. She’d never met one who wasn’t.

“Stay a while,” said Romana. “Just until you’re healed. You two look like you could use the rest.”

The Doctor hesitated, glancing at Loss. She wasn’t much for staying still but the pallor in their face… the way they moved so stiffly… perhaps it would do them good. 

“Just until Loss is better.” She offered “Fred” a small smile. “Thank you.”

“I wouldn’t mind staying, just for a little while.” Loss smiled at Fred. It would be nice to be able to be honest for a bit.

“Of course.” K9 would sulk, but he’d get over it. He just needed a little while with them. A bit of time to pretend that he was someone else. And it was good to see the Doctor again. “Stay as long as you need.”