Work Text:
You already felt nervous while sitting next to your new crew.
It wasn’t them. Well, maybe to some extent it was them as you had a hunch a secondhanded embarrassment would occur very soon in such a nice-looking place like the Baratie.
Your new crew were good people. If you didn’t believe it, you wouldn’t have left the security of your little merchant shop just because Luffy decided he liked your skills of calculations and the odd ability to seemingly fit everything that was needed into any small place imaginable.
Even if he didn’t take your no for an answer, you never really felt forced. At least not like how you did with your old crew, but you rarely liked to think about those times.
Then, before you knew it, you were checking the inventory on his ship —your new home.
Still, as good as Luffy, Zoro, Nami, and Usopp were, you did not believe for a second they wouldn’t cause some distress in the fancy establishment. Trouble always seemed to follow the bunch, and unfortunately or not, you were dragged along the ride.
Despite the fear of embarrassment, there was another reason why you were sweating bullets under your clothing and once again easily surrendering into your specific nervous habit, no doubt looking crazy or at least unstable.
In the open like this, surrounded by all these pirates and sailors, you dreaded seeing anyone from your old crew. The chances were high. Ever since you managed to leave, you had no idea what they were up to.
You would have gladly stayed under the deck just as you used to rather than stay in the security of the shop. Still, everyone told you to come with them, and if you didn’t want to burden them with the real reason why you didn’t want to join another pirate crew in the first place, you didn’t really have much of a choice.
I have to come up with a believable lie for next time, you told yourself, deciding a small lie would be better than enduring this as you not for the first time nervously looked around.
After another few tense moments, for you at least, you decided to use the restrooms and try to wash up a bit.
Your eyes scanned the place a dozen times before you found the courage to do so, somewhat confident no one who knew you from before was around.
You stood up from the table, mumbling about the restroom to the crew just as you noticed someone approach it and, in passing, heard a rather annoyed voice with a thick accent say something like, ‘Hi, welcome to our shitty restaurant…’
Weird, you thought without looking back and hurried into the restroom.
The cold water helped at least a little bit, but you still took your time trying to calm yourself down.
No one was here. None of them would find you, and why would they? You reasoned with yourself. Whatever happened before was history, but deep inside, you always feared they would hold a grudge.
You returned in the midst of chaos as a small fight broke out between some of the customers.
Great, you thought to yourself grimly and waited it out, surprised when it seemed a waiter had defused the situation by beating both customers up without dropping any food in the process.
You weren’t much of a fighter unless you had something you could use to hit them over the head with, but even you were impressed by how skilled he seemed. Something about him caught your eye for a second before you carried on your journey back to your crew.
As the passage cleared, you tried to finally return to your table, only to slip on some spilled water and almost crash into the ground.
Before you did, however, you felt someone snatch your arm and tug you away from the hard floor and toward something solid and dark.
‘Careful now, madam,’ you heard a smooth accented voice above you while your face was pressed against the solid black fabric at an odd angle, ‘Wouldn’t want someone as precious as you to injure yourself.’
Your eyes blinked and leaned away from your salvation, trying to assess what was going on.
Once you did, you found yourself looking at someone with a fine black suit. Someone who was quick and strong enough to save you from falling, it seemed.
You managed to raise your eyes from his suit toward his face and immediately felt heat rush into your cheeks.
Something cracked in the air around you, and for a moment, you forgot where you were and everything else along with it while looking at the stranger.
Huh? You thought desperately as your breath caught inside your throat.
A very nonchalant smirk played across his lips, and the grey-blue eye that wasn’t covered by his blond hair seemed to hint amusement. Whether it was because of some form of endearment, simple amusement, or mockery, you didn’t know.
What you did know was that, based on everything you felt apart from the embarrassment and shock, you were sure your body reactions could only mean one thing.
This man was far too handsome for you to handle.
‘Oh Gods,’ you mumbled, feeling mortified that you almost fell like that. Feeling mortified that someone like him caught you. Feeling mortified that he was now looking at you.
You were never good with attention — much less attention from someone like this man in front of you.
Your heart speeded up, and you averted your gaze. You were also never good with direct eye contact, and despite how it might look, at the moment, you just couldn’t stand to be in the man’s presence any longer.
‘Thank you,’ you mumbled and tried to rush away quickly.
Only when you felt his hand slipping from your arm you realized he had been holding onto you all this time.
Why?
‘You’re very welcome, madam, but the apology is unnecessary,’ he said, causing you to stop before realizing what you were doing. You immediately realized he must have been the waiter who came to your table as you were leaving.
Hesitant, hoping your face didn’t reveal your blush, you looked back at him. You found him still looking at you with that playful smirk, ‘After all, who wouldn’t want to assist a beautiful woman such as yourself.’
Just like that, you snickered before you could stop yourself and felt whatever warm, if slightly embarrassing feeling this man sparked inside you to sour into annoyance and humiliation, ‘Right.’
You turned around and, feeling like an idiot, returned to your crew, debating if you shouldn’t just excuse yourself and leave.
‘I ordered for you,’ said Nami, and you nodded grateful, ‘That’s fine.’
You were right, and the waiter, Sanji, as you learned from Luffy, showed up at your table a couple of times.
You tried to be polite and purposely busied yourself with the menu or gave out short answers without meeting his eyes.
You didn’t like being rude, but you couldn’t really force yourself to look at him or be your usual nice self. Not when it was obvious the man was mocking you.
You weren’t naïve and had a good pair of eyes. You knew how you looked compared to others. You made your peace with that and, in certain ways, even found comfort in not having to fight off the attention of gross old men the way Nami and other striking, pretty women had to all the time. So, to have someone as handsome as Sanji show up and call you beautiful and stunning and like a dream every once in a while, when he showed up at the table, left you feeling completely miserable.
Why was he so cruel?
Why did he need to mock your appearance?
You just met and barely spoke to him. So did he really have to be that much of an asshole? You would still blush and feel embarrassed if he complimented your skills or work on the ship. Still, at least a part of you would accept that he was being sincere and that you truly did a good job, but your appearance was a tricky subject.
You felt humiliated every time Sanji showed up and commented at you, to the point you couldn’t look at anyone, not even your crew, or swallow another bite. That was the real tragedy because before your mood dropped so low, you thought the food was delicious. Luckily, your new captain had no problem finishing your plate so the food wouldn’t go to waste.
‘Was the food not to your liking, madam?’ asked the accented voice close by at one point while you desperately tried not to look anywhere else but at your hands, ‘It was good. Thank you.’
‘I understand,’ he said, and even if you made a point of not meeting his gaze, you knew he was smirking, ‘Perhaps you would enjoy something specific to please your unique palate.’
You winced at his words.
Was he insulting your body or calling you high maintenance or something? Your old crew would do that. They would wrap something up in a compliment or concern, trying to seem like they meant well, only to strike you down or make you look back in your captain’s eyes, and your captain…well, he never bothered with words when he could use his hands.
You got up from the table, mumbling you weren’t feeling too good, which wasn’t much of a lie since you now really did feel bad.
It was unclear to you what took over, but for a moment, you dared yourself to glance at the blond waiter, who was still present. Once you did, you wished you hadn’t because you found him looking directly at you with that smirk still playing across his handsome face and amusement radiating from his eyes.
Not only did he make you feel shitty about yourself, but he was smiling about it now?
It would have been kinder if he kicked you into the gut.
Needless to say, your first impression of the handsome man was not good, and you mentally hoped you would leave as soon as possible so you wouldn’t have to deal with him any more than this.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Unfortunately, you discovered it wouldn’t be that simple when you and your crew brought Zoro’s unconscious and wounded body into Nami’s bed after his fight with Mihawk.
It was the first time you properly looked at him, feeling your stomach sinking.
The bleeding was excessive, and a single look at his wounds was all you needed to be triggered back to the times with your old captain and crew. Deadly injuries were common when the captain’s temper got out of hand. It was why many resorted to snitching on others or making up rumors and such, if only to be labeled as valuable and loyal and avoid his wrath themselves. At times, you wondered if things would have been more bearable if your crew showed more solidarity with each other.
You blinked several times, trying to chase away the fog of vicious memories and return to the present time to your badly injured friend.
‘Baratie,’ your voice was weak when you spoke, and you watched Nami nod.
‘Luffy, we need to go,’ you said to your captain whose gaze never felt Zoro’s wound, ‘I’m not really in the mood for food, you guys,’ said Luffy, uncharacteristically quiet next to you.
‘To get a doctor!’ yelled Nami, and you merely shook your head and pulled at his wrist to drag him back toward the restaurant with you.
You weren’t thinking clearly when you found the head chef and the waiter in the kitchen. You weren’t certain what was said as you were still too shaken from the reality of Zoro being injured and the trauma from your past.
You vaguely recalled Luffy begging for their help while you rambled over what happened all too fast; you didn’t really make sense to yourself, let alone an outsider.
You didn’t notice Sanji approaching you. At least not until you felt a warm, solid palm against your shoulder blades and another against your cheek.
Your eyes got trapped by a pair of grey-blue ones while that accented voice you found all too soothing in that moment spoke, ‘It’s alright, sweetheart.’
His expression was oddly severe for once, but still not completely, ‘Breath with me.’
In a heartbeat, you obeyed, feeling grounded by the instruction that took your mind away from the distress, ‘Our friend is injured. Can you help us, please?’
‘At once, madam,’ said Sanji, and you were certain never in your entire life had anyone looked at you so gently as this man had at that moment while promising his help.
Swallowing, you nodded and allowed the man to lead you back to your ship and your injured crewmate.
It wasn’t until you noticed Usopp’s raised eyebrows and gaze at your side that you realized that somewhere along everything that happened, you or Sanji took hold of the other’s hand and remained that way until now.
With a rapidly beating heart, you gently shook your hand free from his hold, immediately mourning the absence of his touch and warmth, and pushed it into your pocket for comfort. It didn’t seem to help, though. Still, you forced yourself to be grateful and optimistic since, after all, right now, you brought someone who could help Zoro, and that was what mattered.
Your injured crewmate was your main focus, of course, but every once in a while, whenever your gaze met the blond’s, you found him looking at you with fondness and a smirk that seemed just soft enough to be a kind smile.
Sighing you offered him a small nod unsure if it meant there was some peace between you two or something else entirely.
For now, you let it rest.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After the head chef Zeff did all he could for Zoro, you took turns talking to your unconscious friend and maintaining the ship, but apart from that, there wasn’t much to do. The waiting was the worst of it. You left Nami to read to Zoro and went to find something to do. You often felt like morose by nature, but with everything going on, it all seemed even more depressing.
Even if there was no reason for him to stick around, you found Sanji in the ship’s kitchen when you went there to check the inventory. Something you only did to fill the time, as you had already done so just yesterday, ‘Oh, I’m sorry.’
‘For what?’ he chuckled, stealing a glance at you with that typical smirk of his, ‘If anything, a little bit of company would be nice.’
You felt the familiar uneasiness inside your stomach, wondering if he would make fun of you again. Still, simultaneously, you recalled how he calmed you down when you came to ask for help and how sincere he seemed since.
There was also the story he told you all about how Zeff sacrificed his leg to save him, which forced you to excuse yourself and cry a little bit on your own, only for the man to call after you, mocking you again by acting all sweet and lovable.
Overall, you didn’t think you ever met a man who puzzled you as much as Sanji.
‘Please,’ he said, ‘I find it abnormal to have a kitchen all to myself.’
Biting your lower lip momentarily, you decided to enter, telling yourself you could pretend to be busy while checking the supplies.
Yet, you darted your eyes to his hands. They work for a moment before you move to gaze at his face. You were puzzled by this man. He seemed so focused, and in his element, you almost didn’t want to speak in fear to ruin his concertation and work.
Your gazes met, and once again, he offered you a little smirk. You couldn’t decide if he was secretly making fun of you, trying to trick you, or being genuine? But if so, why the games?
You rushed to the opposite side and turned your back to him while taking quick notes and counting.
You could clearly hear him cutting vegetables and stirring something occasionally, and yet, you felt his grey-blue eyes on you at all the time, too.
‘I have to say, I’m impressed,’ he said after a moment of tense silence.
You blinked, turning to find him with his back to you. Were you just imagining his gaze after all?
‘I find the number of supplies you manage to fit almost surreal,’ he chuckled and glanced at you.
You averted your eyes, feeling the familiar heat return to your face, ‘I’m just good at filling every little crack with something.’ At your old ship, if you didn’t find a way to fit all the supplies and things the captain wanted on the ship, you wouldn’t eat dinner or, worse, face his wrath.
He glanced at you again, and when you looked at him, you found him smiling, ‘Now you’re just selling yourself unfairly short, sweetheart.’
He turned his back to you and said, ‘If I’m not mistaken, you have to consider the number of people on board. How much will they eat or need for however many days you have until your next stop? Not to mention, consider the weight of everything on the ship.’
Your heart swelled with pride just as it had when Luffy pointed out how cool it was that you could do all that, like it was one of the best tricks he ever saw. Even if it was hard to accept the praise, it was nice to be appreciated. You never got such a treatment when you were with your old crew.
As you felt too self-aware to look at him and see his eyes after he made you feel so good about yourself, you chose to turn away, ‘Thank you. You’re… that’s nice of you to say.’
It was a nice thing to say, and you felt a bit guilty that you always thought of him so harshly.
When you suddenly felt him by your side, your eyes widened, and you swiftly turned to glance at him.
Too close, you thought as you felt his body heat against your skin, even through clothing.
He offered you another smirk. Oddly, no matter how many times he smirked at you, you never felt genuinely threatened or put off by it. They just left your heart beating too fast and your palms sweaty.
Sanji reached for one of the boxes in the cabin above your head, ‘Just being honest, madam. Cross my heart.’
Your heart might as well have been trying to jump out of your chest with how fast it was beating when he said that.
Cruel, you thought to yourself. No matter how he wrapped it, he was a really cruel man for doing all of this to you.
He offered you a single wink and returned back to his cooking while you decided to finish this later and ran out. You just felt too overwhelmed by this man at the moment to stick around longer, even if perhaps a tiny part of you wouldn’t have minded.
You still weren’t sure what to think about the blond, but when he praised your skills rather than your looks, you felt he might be sincere.
The fact remained that the man puzzled you. At times, he sounded like a genuinely nice enough man, even funny and pleasant to be around, but then he would start to compliment you and make you feel nervous. It wasn’t good when it was just the two. As much as you would prefer to avoid him, it seemed impossible. But by the gods of the sea, it got worse when others were around, and they could hear it all.
You just found yourself feeling too exposed and embarrassed. You didn’t like to be made fun of. And the only reason why you never tried to tell him it bothered you or stop talking to him was that, despite all of this, you didn’t wish to start anything. You wanted to keep the peace, and as long as his comments remained just comments, you would endure. You endured far worse, after all.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It honestly took you a while to realize he wasn’t mocking you, or at least not doing so on purpose. Maybe you would have realized it sooner had you all not been dealing with Nami’s absence and the whole Arlong mess.
It wasn’t until you met with Nami’s sister, Nojiko, that it really hit you.
He was a flirt.
That was all to it.
He wasn’t mocking or singling you out; he just acted like this with every woman he met.
You felt a mixture of things. You were relieved that he wasn’t making fun of you, just being himself. Another part of you was even grateful that despite your apparent lacking in the traditional beauty department, he still treated you the same way as any of the number of the really beautiful women he encountered. You couldn’t recall the last time you were treated nicely in such a way. But of course, because of your insecurities, you couldn’t completely shake the feeling of embarrassment whenever he would call you beautiful or give you attention, mainly because even if he wasn’t making fun of you, you knew some might or worse people would think you actually thought all those things were true. You just didn’t like the attention. It made your flaws feel far too exposed.
‘Here, let me do that, so you can eat,’ you offered to fill the plates in his place. You already finished eating anyway, and you didn’t really like to sit around pointlessly.
‘Nonsense,’ he said, but it seemed he brightened up even more than he was before when you approached him, ‘It wouldn’t feel right to let a woman of your beauty to do all the work.’
You almost sighed, but now that you knew it wasn’t in bad taste, you forced yourself to grimace, ‘Then at least let me help you with the dishes?’
The blond chuckled and shook his head at you. He seemed genuinely amused with a hind of fondness when he spoke, ‘You certainly are hard working. Don’t you ever rest?’
You shrugged your shoulders before you quickly started to work on the pile of dishes the villager brought for cleaning during the celebration of the Straw Hat Crew’s victory.
‘Here,’ you heard Sanji behind you.
Before you could properly turn around, you watched a pair of hands put an apron around you, ‘Wouldn’t want you to ruin your clothes.’
You forced yourself to stay calm and offered the man a smile and a quiet thanks before you resumed your work on the dishes.
It was nice. Due to your personality, you never particularly liked crowds or a lot of people. But whenever you were forced to be around them or had a need for it, you always tried to gain an option to still find your personal solitude for a few moments or hours. Sometimes, when it happened, you felt lonely, but tonight, you couldn’t help but smile at how happy and festive everyone was around you. Their good mood affected your own.
Especially Nami’s. Watching her from time to time, you smile to yourself, knowing she was genuinely happy for her to have her freedom and name cleaned at last.
‘Our captain sure is something else,’ said the blond behind you, still serving out food.
You turned to see what he meant and smiled at Luffy goofing around with Usopp and some villagers.
You nodded, ‘He is. But given how pirate captains usually are, it’s a good thing.’
You resumed your work, and based on the number of times someone said thanks or Sanji chatted up some random woman, you assumed he did, too.
After a while, you heard him speak again, ‘Usopp said he’s not your first captain, though.’
‘Usopp talks a lot,’ you commented, feeling your stomach sinking and your nervous habit awakening just as it always had whenever you thought about your old life. Even on such a nice night like this one, with everyone so happy and carefree, your traumatizing past snuck up on you.
‘Ah, don’t do that, sweetheart. You’re hurting yourself, and such a pretty woman should never do so to herself,’ said the blond effortlessly, yet with a hint of concern.
You quickly stopped and tried to busy yourself with work again, ‘Sorry.’ You still felt nervous and knew if you weren’t busy and trying to actively fight it, you would easily succumb to the habit again.
You finished the last plate so far, and without anything else to do but anxiously wait.
Debating with yourself for a moment, you turned to watch the blond. Seeing the way he worked so focused, pleased with his work, himself, and skilled, you felt your heartbeat slow down. It seemed you found comfort in watching him.
He wasn’t looking at you, but you could tell he was aware you could see him.
It must have been the sense of peace he seemed to have brought you that you found your lips moving apart, ‘My first captain was not a good guy. Neither was anyone in my old crew.’
You regretted your words immediately. You didn’t speak about your old crew for a reason, and you honestly didn’t want to ruin everyone’s mood at the moment.
For a second, you noticed Sanji pause and look very much lost in his thoughts before he turned toward you.
You were confused, especially when he reached for your hand, but nevertheless, you allowed him to take it.
Even if he must have been going for serious, he looked nothing but properly soft when he said, ‘I can assure you at least this cook plans to be nothing but good to you.’
It was just a bunch of words in a sentence, but when he said it and pressed a soft kiss against your palm, you couldn’t help but wonder if it was a personal vow to you. It sure sounded like one. Oddly enough, despite everything you’ve been through, even if just a tiny bit, you believed it. You believed him.
His eyes remained kind and face soft, and for one wildest moment, you almost found yourself wondering if he would do something else. Something more.
Then, however, out of the blue, someone loudly cleared their throat, and you jumped away, pulling your hand out of his.
‘If you two plan to slack off, you should let someone else handle this,’ you heard Zoro say and mentally cursed yourself while feeling your face heating up with embarrassment.
‘Don’t be jealous,’ you heard Sanji reply, ‘If you smiled every once in a while, and wasn’t such a pain in the ass, I’m positive we could find you someone to adore too.’
You didn’t dare to turn around and tried to appear busy with the new dishes someone brought you making sure not to look at the blond again no matter how often you felt his gaze on you-
Wait-
Someone to adore too?!
Koniec