Work Text:
lazar, come out.
please come out;
you will be unbound,
you will be let go.
rabbi, they call me. teacher. lord.
in this moment i am
son, brother, lover,
friend;
weeping at the loss
of one i have taken into my heart.
my father hears me
always.
i have never been alone, and yet--
i have never been alone.
son of david, son of god, son of man
in this moment i want
nothing more than to be
son of yosef, the carpenter.
only a man.
a very tired and very sad man.
“see how he loved him,” they’re saying.
yes.
but my love has brought pain and tears
and i let it happen.
a fated death is natural, no?
no. nothing about this is natural.
everything about this is natural
(“thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven”).
i have taught these people my father’s words;
i have taught these people my father’s will.
but i am not ready for this loss,
i am not ready for this pain;
mortality is something i can never grasp
but it covers this world
like the sand covers the desert,
like the water covers the sea.
so come out.
lazar, come out.
please come out.
come out.