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You didn't often dream, and when you did, they were fleeting
However, more recently, you found yourself crossing into dreams rather than waking.
These new dreams that plagued you in and outside of the realm of slumber were terrifying.
They were different yet the same, all coming to the same conclusion.
The death of your dearly beloveds.
You woke with a start, chest heaving, eyes blurry and body soaked.
As your now waking mind tried to grapple with what your sleeping mind conjured, two sets of hands reached out for you in the darkness. At first, you struggled against them, but after a few moments the world around you came back into focus and those hands from the darkness were no longer such, but instead—
"Darling."
"Honey."
Names of affection that always seemed to ground you (unless they were using them to get out of trouble). You accepted their soothing words and touch, finding your body slowly, but surely unwinding from the stress tension.
However, your lips remained firmly shut. They didn't push you, because they already knew. You told them the first few times, but after one specific one, you vowed to never speak of them again, and they respected your decision (despite desperately wanting to know the truth behind your locked lips).
You don't know how much time had passed, but when they tried to get you to lay back down, you forced yourself out of their grasp. Your arms wrapped around yourself as if you were trying to keep yourself from shattering like an hourglass and becoming sand on the sheets.
"No, I don't want to go back to sleep." You paused, swallowing harshly. "I can't."
So you relocated to the living room, where feel good movies were put on to pull you away from the darkness plaguing your mind. Very quickly did you begin to doze off and Satoru's arms, but you kept fighting it off.
Suguru sighed softly, "Darling...you can let go. We'll be right—" You flinched, body reacting faster than any of you could process. Your hands clapped over Suguru's mouth.
"Don't. Please." You knew what words dared to slip from his lips, but you just couldn't. Not even if their words would be to reassure you, that everything's already, and they're right there with you.
It didn't matter.
Because just as they were here with you now,
they could be gone without a trace when your back was turned.
And then your fears would be realized.
You were not getting sleep. You refused to get sleep.
You had to keep an eye on them or else they'd slip away.
You couldn't let them slip away.
And if they did,
you hoped that they would at least bring you with them.
They didn't.
They left you without so much as a proper goodbye.
Stolen from your embrace.
And now you were only left with their parting words that they had left you that morning.
Just as they had done any other morning.
"We'll see you later tonight, Love."
Now you knew.
To dream of death is to dream of an omen.
And once again,
You found yourself dreaming of death again.
But this time, you embraced it with wide open arms.
Ready to meet your dearly beloveds on the other side.
Fate was a cruel and twisted bitch.
No goodbyes.
No seeing each other on the other side.
Instead, you were punished.
Punished to live another life with your memories intact.
Without them.
And you were forced to live this life out.
Because every time you tried to end it prematurely,
you were brought back.
Every.
Single.
Time.
You don't know what the gods wanted you to do in this life.
If not only suffer.
You did not know if they would force you to live again and again until they finally grew bored of you.
But they best keep their Eye on their new favorite plaything.
For once, their backs were turned
You would curse the gods to Everlasting Damnation.