Work Text:
Cocolia takes her seat onto the Supreme Guardian chair in front of thousands of cameras and reporters filling her office.
“Good evening, Belobog. As you all can see I have survived and am alive and well thanks to this.. eidolon cheese, and its.. fanfiction.”
Cocolia points at the colourful cheese resting peacefully atop her desk.
“I have called for interviewers only to tell the story of how Serval Landau abducted me from the past.”
The door to the office opens loudly as the figure in question practically breaks into the room.
“COCOLIA NOOO!”
69 years of Serval’s grief (and cringeness) ago.
It was probably the middle-age crisis, but one of those days when Serval was practically sobbing because of Cocolia (20 years after their break up) (oh and 1 more after her death, poor thing) she got an idea for..
“THE TIME MACHINE!”
Pela looked at the nuts and bolts constructed together amongst some metal, then glanced weirdly at Serval.
“Seek help.”
Serval crossed her arms, huffing proudly “Don’t worry! I’m so special that my therapist said I should walk free and reconsider my life choices. And after I did so.. I thought of this beauty!”
She hugged the huge device while Pela took a step back, visibly concerned.
Serval moved away and walked over to the main desk where there were...about several empty energy drink bottles. She took one that had been almost finished and emptied the bottom.
“So tell me,” Pela pointed at the bottles “how much of these have you drank today?”
“Ah? About 10 since this morning!”
(Do not follow Serval’s example, because you know, she’s not exactly ok in the head.)
Pela stared dumbly while Serval took the empty bottle she held over to the time machine.
“Okay so Pela, watch closely, alright?”
She placed the bottle on the bottom of the chamber-like time machine and stood behind at the controls, activating buttons with beeping sounds (like those, you know, alien movies spaceships? Ring a bell? No? Ok you’ve officially never seen a spaceship.) then pulling up a lever and making the machine go brrrrrrrrrrrrr bzzzzttt (a.k.a. high voltage) until...
THE bottle was absorbed in something similar to a black hole and..disappeared. Never to be seen again.
Pela pointed with a crazy look at the time machine as Serval powered it down.
“Y..you want to throw yourself INTO THAT??”
Serval shrugged nonchalantly.
“Obviously.”
Pela stared horrified while Serval smiled sheepishly at her. In utter silence btw.
“Alright, listen I know a nice hospital nearby that deals with trauma, brain problems caused from past relationships and especially screws back your loose screws-”
“Ah, ah, ah.” Serval waved a refusing finger in front of Pela “You see I’m just fine.”
Says that while tearing up in front of Pela right at this moment only because she remembered Cocolia.
“You..you don’t understand, I MISS HER..” sniffles and ugly sobbing follow “Pleeeeeeaseeee Pela, help me to go in the past and fetch her OR LIVE THERE ANYTHING BUT STAYING ALONE AAAAAAAA...”
Serval lied down on the floor, depression hitting her in the face, while Pela towered about with crossed arms and a long sigh.
“Down bad, huh?” Pela glanced at the machine with X2 number sigh “Alright, fine..” she cleared her throat while Serval practically jumped off the floor, suddenly over her emo phase.
“REALLY??” Serval glanced proudly at the time machine with fisted hands resting onto her hips (like those superhero poses or something)
“MISSION RESCUE COCOLIA, HERE WE GO!”
Pela rubbed on her temples anxiously then released number 3 sigh “Alright, slow down. First we must think of what and how you’ll do it if you end up in the right place.”
Serval glanced at her confused “Hm?” she waved off a hand “I’ll obviously just grab her and go.”
Pela blinked emptily a great amount of times “Seriously.. you REALLY believe that Cocolia would just jump in your arms and be like..”
The scene plays in Pela’s head, off brand Romeo and Juliet style (or something similar because I couldn’t think of anything else):
“Oh! Cocolia, my dear beloved, I have come to save you!” Serval places a dramatic hand over her chest.
“Serval! Come, take me, free me! I have missed you so much! I want to kiss you!”
Cocolia *somehow* falls in Serval’s arms, letting herself to be knightly carried (bride style) and a long list of intense smooches follows as Serval, again – *somehow* ends up on a pretty white horse (wait shouldn’t it be a unicorn? Eh whatever.) and they ride off into the sunset. The end. Well, at least for the story in Pela’s head.
“No, that won’t happen.” Pela snapped back out of her thoughts and shook her head.
“Well.. OBVIOUSLY, this isn’t a fantasy yuri bedtime story!” Serval huffed “But carrying Cocolia like that..”
Pela quite literally shoved her friend into the time machine “Okay shoo, just go, be safe!”
Pela stood behind the machine controls, while Serval was excitedly smiling as she was standing under the machine.
“Ready??”
Serval put a thumbs up as Pela powered up the time machine, and.. TA-DA! Serval disappeared.
I know, I know, we are coming onto the *important* part now, let’s see...
Oops I’ve lost my notes.
Jk ;)
Serval found herself..somewhere.
She stood up, looking around.
“Oh! It’s Everwinter hill.” She leaped up the steps to the still standing engine of creation, until...
“RULES ARE MEANT TO BE BROKEN!” Stelle pointed with her bat at the..the..Cocolia.
Oh yes, Serval is fangirling from behind.
“GO COCOLIA GO!” Serval waved a tissue, almost looking like those proud mothers sending their children overseas.
And...that is how right before the fight she attracted everyone’s attention.
“Serval?” Dan Heng stared confused, trying to put everything in order with his, especially bright mind “Weren’t you at the gate still? Why are you here?”
Serval just remembered. Yes this is the moment in which she was not here.
“Ah, um.. eh.. AH!” everyone blinked emptily at Serval, poor emotionless Cocolia even raised her eyebrows “It’s.. becaaause..um..oh! Because my brother stayed behind.” She put up a finger, with that nerd emoji face.
“Ha..haha..” she subtly (but very obviously) tried to scoot herself over to Cocolia.
“She’s lying.” Cocolia crossed her arms with a sigh, making her *enemies* to glance at her instead.
“Well! No matter!” Stelle pulled out her bat again, pointing it at Cocolia with a dramatic battle stance “WE SHALL SETTLE THIS HERE AND NOW!”
“No you won’t.”
And thus, Serval SNATCHED Cocolia from the battle, throwing her over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes and running away from the trailblazers like a fool.
Bronya stared dumbly as the two disappeared from their sights “Mothers...?”
Serval ran down the hill with a rather..rebellious Cocolia still thrown over her shoulder.
“LET ME GO! AA LET ME, LET ME OUT LET ME GO I WILL FIGHT YOU!” Cocolia kicked her feet barking out like an alpha (this is not omegaverse, keep dreaming) , while Serval shook her head in utter refusal.
“No, no and no.”
Cocolia glared from behind, even though Serval couldn’t see it.
“I hate you.” Cocolia grunted while Serval smiled sheepishly.
“Aw, I love you too!”
Serval slowed down her running for walking and after a while of silence only filled with footsteps crushing snow, Cocolia let out a deep sigh, seemingly slightly given up at escaping, for now.
“Where are you carrying me anyways..?” she asked, in a low tone.
Serval hummed, pleasantly surprised “Hm? Home, where else..?” she sighed dramatically “Listen it’s about time we got over our break up era. It has been..difficult, without you around.”
Need I remind you this is not angst? Nonono this is NOT angst. Sheds tears. This..is..not..angst...
And then, bam, they..reached the gate.
Serval stopped walking, staring dumbly at. Her other self, or rather, her past self.
Gepard pointed frantically at both of them “S-s-s..SISTERS???”
“Hi!” our current Serval who still carried a confused Cocolia over her shoulder, grinned gleefully at the other, past Serval.
Ok, to better understand this *situation* we must separate the Servals, how do..we do that? Okay okay let’s think..
Okay, i got it, we will leave *our* current Serval with her name, while past Serval will now officially be named... (dramatic fanfare)
“Perval!” Serval nodded her head in self agreement “I will call you Perval, like, Past + Serval = Perval.”
Perval stared weirdly, until nodding her head nerdishly as well “That makes sense...” until the realisation hit her like a plank on her head.
“..HOLD ON HOW ARE YOU EVEN HERE?? AND WHY ARE YOU CARRYING COCOLIA?!”
Serval suddenly dropped Cocolia on the ground, and stepped closer to Perval, whispering to her while Cocolia and Gepard stared weirdly.
Cocolia stepped towards Gepard, suddenly..not very keen on escaping. One Serval is already trouble enough BUT TWO OF THEM?!
“Say, Captain Gepard.. are you seeing what I’m seeing or have I gone insane for good?”
Gepard nodded slowly “I see it too Madam Guardian.. there’s two of my sister..”
“OH! I see.” Perval nodded, finally aware of the situation “Okay, I will help you. Problem is though..”
The two figures continued to whisper amongst themselves, and finally after a lot of odd giggling with glances at Cocolia they came to a conclusion.
“Alright. We are going to the workshop.” Serval approached Cocolia, throwing her over her shoulder, once again – without permission.
“Come Lia, let’s go.”
Cocolia sighed, this time at least she got enough comfort to cross her arms while being carried “Not like I had much of a choice now did I.”
“Oh please, I know you’re not complaining.” Serval rolled her eyes, while Cocolia grunted.
“Maybe.”
Yay, they now reached the workshop, but..there was a little problem.
Which, Serval realised very belatedly.
“Oh..fuck.”
She stared at the workshop, which OBVIOUSLY wouldn’t contain the time machine BECAUSE its her workshop from the PAST.
“Shit..”
She glanced at Perval with a sigh and crossed arms “I didn’t think through the fact that the time machine wouldn’t come with me.”
Cocolia scoffed “Obviously, they don’t come as a package.”
Both mechanics let out a deep sigh as Cocolia carelessly sat on top of the main desk and clicked her nails together.
“Well..what are we going to do now?” Perval glanced to the other two.
“Now.” Cocolia slid off the desk “You two will let me go, so I can finish my fight with the trailblazers.”
The two mechanics immediately barricaded the workshop exit “No Lia, we can’t!”
Cocolia placed a hand over her hip “And why not?”
Serval grunted, throwing a glance at Perval until getting a nod of approval, then looking back at Cocolia.
“I..come from the future, and in that fight..something really bad happens.”
Cocolia wheezed horrifically “WHAT? DO I DIE??”
Serval stared nervously, until nodding.
“Damn! Okay, uh do I win though??”
Cocolia’s questions..were weird to say in the least, I guess that’s what happens to someone when they see their ex (not so ex but still, you know, pretenses).. practically cloned and standing in front of them.
“No.” Serval shook her head.
“Interesting. Let’s say I do come with you..to the future, what would happen?”
“We don’t know.” Both mechanics responded in sync.
“Wonderful.” Cocolia remarked, slightly sarcastic perhaps.
“But Lia..” Serval stepped close to Cocolia, holding up one of her hands into her own “I have missed you. And I am willing to do anything, to have you back. My life..it’s been sad without you. I really wished the time machine took me back further when you were still yourself fully so I could take you from then, but even now, I think there is a chance that we could start over.”
And THUS Serval bent down one knee, pulling out a small jewellery square box from her pocket and rising up her hands while opening it in front of Cocolia.
“Marry me.”
Staring dumbly, is probably describing it vaguely. Like, all of you must understand that Cocolia’s expression is a practical void as she stared down at the ring placed in the box Serval held.
Next time when you find yourself wondering on how to snap your girlfriend from her cold elegance, just pull out a ring, even if you’re already married like, give her a bit of a shock.
(Bad, bad advice.)
Cocolia’s expression shifted as she now stared in slight guilt “I..but.. we broke up so long ago. Would you really love me again, even if I am damaged and trying to recover? It would be difficult for you..”
Cocolia let out a low grunt while continuing “It’s just..I never wished for anything bad for you. Even as I kicked you from the Architects. From your job. I only did it so I don’t harm you with my future behaviour. Please understand, to me, it means a lot that you want to..try again, however you must really be sure of it.”
Serval shed tears “Cocolia you don’t understand I am absolutely Cocussy deprived!#&%*#?”
“Then I accept.”
And so, Serval put the ring on Cocolia’s finger, omg engagementttt and there were a lot of smooches as Perval shed tears of happiness beside them with a tissue in hand.
(OF COURSE IT’S GONNA BE A SUCCESSFUL LOVE STORY)
Several days later, the two mechanics rebuilt the time machine and Cocolia and Serval went to the future, together forever and all that shit.
The end.
Oh no wait, WAIT NO DON’T PUT DOWN THE CURTAINS YET!
Remember the interview at the start? Yeah that’s how it happened.. but why did Serval try to stop Cocolia?
Not because it is a secret, because THEIR WEDDING IS A SURPRISE.
Ok now you can put down this weird read thank god.