Chapter Text
It was currently late at night. Most people, if not everyone in the manor were already long asleep, your lover who was laying right beside you being one of them.
Yet, you couldn’t find the will nor the ability to fall asleep. As much as you wish you could do that so you wouldn’t be dealing with all these thoughts and fears that were forcing you to stay awake while everyone else had the pleasure of sleeping.
You lay on your side, back facing your lover as you wrap your arms around yourself, trying to stop whatever tears that were threatening to spill then and there.
This just happens sometimes after all! It’s just paranoia, there’s nothing going to come of it! Those were the things you were desperately trying to tell yourself.
But then there’s that thought that what if something does happen and it’s far too late to be fixed or even noticed.
That no matter what, nothing can be done to stop or fix it in time. That everything you do now doesn’t matter because it’ll all just end anyways.
These thoughts only kept forcing you into a deeper and deeper rabbit hole, one that felt like you couldn’t crawl out of.
You tried desperately to think of happy memories, good moments to help distract yourself, but you just kept falling deeper and deeper.
Then, finally, the dam broke. You started silently sobbing, covering your mouth so that you wouldn’t make any form of noise so as to not disturb him.
It felt like you were silently screaming at some points, trying your damnedest to keep any noise from escaping and failing to do that here and there.
The tears wouldn’t stop spilling out and your head was already aching with pain because of it.
After a few minutes of nonstop sobbing, you hear a small meow before you feel something jump in the spot right in front of you.
One you feel whiskers on your face, you open your eyes to see it’s one of Alva’s most trusted cats, and it seems like she has a goal in mind as her nose is practically touching your own.
Without saying anything, you pulled her close to you, sniffling as you wrapped your arms around her, to which she didn’t mind at all.
The cat settled down, getting comfortable as she had no plans of getting up until morning. Her only goal was to help comfort you.
Before you had the opportunity to cry again, a pair of strong arms had wrapped themselves around you. Immediately recognizing who it was, you felt yourself relaxing, but buried your face into the cat, earning another small meow as you did.
You didn’t want him to exactly see you like this, even though he has before, as you have seen him in panic driven moments.
There was a soft kiss placed on your head before your love spoke.
“My dear,” he began, his voice much deeper than usual, indicating that he might’ve just woken up from his slumber.
“Are you alright?” Alva asked, concern very apparent in his tired tone, though no matter how tired he is, Alva will always show concern for you.
You give a small nod, not wanting to use your voice since it would most likely give away that you’ve been crying, though it’s not like he’d have to be a detective to guess that.
His grip tightened slightly, but more of in a comforting way. As if to say that he’s here for you.
“Just overthinking is all…” you say rather quietly, upset at yourself that he’s now awake, worrying that it was your sobbing that did it.
Alva shifted slightly so that his chin could be resting comfortably on your head, one arm reaching up so that he could run his fingers through your hair.
“About what, my love?” He asked, continuing with this soothing motion as he felt you relax a tad bit more, which relieved him.
When there was no response, he completely understood, not wanting to push. So, he decided to continue to comfort you, in ways that didn’t require you to use words.
Feeling him caress your cheek, you lean into his cold touch, enjoying such a feeling since your skin felt rather warm at that moment.
Pushing your back into him slightly so that you could feel him all around. Just him holding you was helping distract you from these evil thoughts.
“I’m here for you.”
“You’re not alone.”
“These are only thoughts.”
Alva would whisper things like that, in hopes that they’d help you, even if it was only by a little bit.
To which they did, but it was more of the fact that he was trying his best more than what he was saying. Though there was still a part of you that was upset that he woke up. You’d rather him sleep, yet, there was a part of you that was grateful to have him awake nonetheless.
You felt him place a few more kisses on your head, before moving so that he could place some upon your cheek, to which you didn’t mind the slightest.
Alva continues to hold you, making sure you are very aware of the fact that he’s here for you, and nothing will ever change that.
Nothing in this world could ever change how he feels nor the want to make you feel better when he has the chance to do so.
Him being here right now is his way of proving that to you.
A few minutes of silence goes by when you hear him chuckle.
Feeling a tad bit curious, you turn your head slightly so that you can see him.
“I see someone has gotten to you before I could.” Alva pointed out, noticing the cat that you’re still cuddling with.
She looks up for a second, meows at him and lays her head back down, possibly wanting to get some sleep before the sun comes up.
“She did.” You gave a small chuckle back, the tiredness of everything starting to catch up with you now that you’ve calmed down.
Now that your face was more in range, he places a soft kiss on your nose, the small smile from you not going unnoticed.
He gives you one more kiss but on the lips this time, he didn’t want to keep you awake for too long after all. Not when he can clearly see how tired you truly are.
“Please, get some rest, my love.” Alva said, hoping that you’d be able to get some decent rest for tomorrow.
Giving a small nod, you yawn before letting go of the cat, to which she didn’t like but she allowed you to do so.
You turn around so now that you can bury your face into his chest, in case these thoughts do come back, you’ll have him right by you.
Before falling asleep, you mutter a quiet “thank you, I love you, my dear”
“I’ll do whatever I can to make you feel safe and better, my rose. You have my heart.”
With those words repeating in your head, you’re able to finally drift off into a peaceful sleep.