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The dancy music pounds in his ears, his head, his chest, something Shepard recognizes as distinctively human because it has that note of primal abandon, almost panic, what if I just let it all go? question never asked but still there somewhere. Garrus pointed it out to him, once, "human music is not good for combat. Makes my heart pound. Can't aim properly," he said, and Shepard can't unhear it now.
The dance floor is heavily populated, mostly humans, a few asari, a handful of turians, but that's why they chose this bar in the first place. He shifts on his bar stool, looks at his companion. His friend. His... something.
"So. How many drinks will it take to make you dance then," muses Kaidan and Shepard rolls his eyes.
"Really. You people really need to find another joke about me."
"That would be hard," Kaidan breaths a laugh, "you know there aren't many things you're bad at," he says and lowers his gaze, and Shepard thinks that yes, there are, he's bad at this, bad at reading those warm brown eyes, bad at reading his own mind, bad at deciding what it is that he wants. Are you flirting with me Commander? asked Kaidan once, and Shepard never really stopped thinking about it. Was he? Is Kaidan?
Shepard just shrugs. "Yeah, I'm perfect," he says and Kaidan's smile is the brightest thing in the dark room for a few seconds.
"I'll say."
So here they are, drinking and eyeing people on the dance floor, Kaidan's idea of a fun shore leave, one you wouldn't really expect from a person who always said crowds, lights and noises give him headaches. More like a headache, recently, Shepard watched and is pretty sure they never really stop now, just go up and down in intensity, and Kaidan says "it's nothing, I'm combat-ready, I can still fight with you, I won't let you down", but Shepard isn't blind and also Kaidan's combat-readiness is not what he meant when he asked "are you okay?".
Ah, Reapers. Bringing the best out of everyone.
Kaidan smiles at some lady dancing nearby. He makes a little wave but the girl turned away already, some asari catches his wave instead and winks at him.
"Now I don't know who should I buy that drink for," Kaidan laughs, and before he can think about it, Shepard is saying "me. You can buy me one," and then braces for impact, because that was always the best - if risky - tactic when he didn't know what to do next: throw himself head-first into battle, no regrets, no second-thoughts, the wisdom will come with experience.
"Can I?" Kaidan looks at him, and Shepard grips his old drink tighter, downs it in one go, says "you can," and still doesn't know if he's flirting or not, but it doesn't matter. Something is pounding in his chest and maybe it's music, and he can understand the appeal of the nightclub now, familiar rush of adrenaline but without the danger of losing his life. Just his head. Maybe. His heart.