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“You’ve changed, Detective.”
Flack looked up at the lyrical British voice he heard to his left. For a moment he looked at her, then nodded to the seat next to him. Peyton sat down and ordered her own drink from the bartender. “So’ve you, Peyton.”
“Not as much as you, though. I called out to you earlier when I was visiting the labs and you didn’t respond. And…I’ve heard things.”
Flack smiled a bleak smile. “Wouldn’t be surprised.” He took a sip of his beer. “People love to talk.”
The bartender served her her drink and she took a small sip. “So it’s true?”
“That I’m not ready with a quip, that I’m not as nice as I used to be, that I put up with a lot less BS than before? Yeah, all true.” He looked at his watch. “Why are you here?”
“I think I just needed to see for myself if the stories were true.” She began to stand up. “I’m sorry to say I fear they are.”
“Mac send you?” he asked as she took a step away from the bar.
“Stella did,” she said.
“Good old Stell,” he muttered. “Look, Peyton, while I’m glad you’re back for a visit, because I’m sure everyone else is glad to see you, I’m pretty much a loner these days. And I want to be alone right now, okay?”
She nodded. “Okay.” She left the bar and he watched her go before taking another drink.
He could pinpoint the exact day his life had taken the turn it had now. It had started with Jess’s death. It took him a long time to get over her death, to move on. He threw himself into his work, spent all his time away from the places that reminded him of her. It had almost gotten to the point where he stayed away from home most nights. He had settled for buying a new bed eventually, one he didn’t intend to share for quite a while.
He was almost there, almost to the point where he would be normal again, when Danny got shot again, only this time he didn’t make it. Everyone was devastated, no one more than Lindsay and himself. And Lindsay so much more than him, he knew, but Danny had been his best friend for so many years, long before Lindsay was ever a blip on the radar. But she had loved him, and she was now a single mother with a young daughter to raise. It hadn’t surprised anyone when she decided to return to Montana. He just looked at it as another hole in his life. Jess, Danny, Lindsay…all of them were holes.
He broke from his thoughts when he saw Peyton returning to the bar, three people down from him. She sat on the stool and waited for the bartender to give her another drink. He would have thought she would leave, since she hadn’t fulfilled the mission Stella sent her on. After all, this wasn’t Sullivan’s, she didn’t know anyone there. Intrigued, he got up, drink in hand, and went over to her.
“Thought you’d have left by now,” he said.
She shook her head. “I enjoy a drink every once in a while. Someone crashed into me and my drink spilled all over me. See?”
He took a closer look and saw telltale wetness on her shirt. “That sucks.”
“At least it wasn’t cola,” she said as the bartender handed her another drink.
“What are you drinking, anyway?”
“Well, I was drinking Sprite. Now I’m enjoying a rum and Coke, and I’m staying safely at the bar until I finish it.”
He grinned slightly. “Want company?”
“Thought you were a loner these days.”
“Sometimes even loners want company.” She indicated the empty seat to her left and sat down. “Why are you back in the States, anyway?”
“A conference. I’m a speaker there,” she replied. “It starts in two days, but I decided I wanted a mini vacation, so I planned for two days before the conference and two days after. I do miss New York sometimes.”
He nodded. “What kind of conference?”
“Forensics. I’m talking about forensic pathology and how it’s being used in the United Kingdom.”
“Impressive,” he said.
“Not really. Though I will be sharing some interesting stories,” she said, taking a sip of her drink. “I know Sid will appreciate them. He always did like unusual autopsies.”
“Yeah.”
She was quiet for a moment. “May I ask a personal question?”
“Maybe,” he said.
“I heard about all that happened. Are you okay?”
He was quiet for a moment. “No, I’m not.”
She nodded. “I’m sorry, then.”
He looked over at her and expected to see pity but saw something else instead. She truly was sorry. Not sorry for him, but simply sorry that bad things had happened to him and around him. “Thanks,” he said quietly.
“If you would like to talk, I have nothing but time tonight,” she said, laying a hand over the one he had on the bar.
He nodded slowly, looking down at her hand. “Yeah, I think I might want to talk.”
She smiled at him. “Then why don’t I risk having another drink spill on me and we move to a booth? It would be more comfortable.”
“Works for me. Let me get another beer first, though.” He ordered a beer and they waited patiently for it before heading to the back where the booths were. “I have a question for you.”
“Yes?” she said.
“How did you feel when you came back and found of Mac and Stell had gotten married?”
“It hurt, a little. But I didn’t expect him to pine away over me, and even when Mac and I were together I realized he had quite a strong connection with Stella. I think it was inevitable,” she said, looking down at her drink.
“What about you?”
“Me?” she asked.
“Are you seeing anyone?”
She laughed slightly and shook her head. “No. Most of my relationships have ended well, but they’ve all ended after only a few months. I don’t believe I will ever get into a long term relationship again.”
“Yeah, I hear you on that,” he said.
“I remember Jessica,” Peyton said. “She was a lovely woman.”
“Yeah, she was,” he said with a nod. “She’d probably kick the crap out of me for being how I am now, though.”
“It’s a devastating experience,” she said. “I don’t think she would be kicking you too hard, especially when it’s compounded with Danny’s death.”
“Maybe,” he said. “I didn’t mean to end up like this. I’m just tired of losing the people I care about, you know?”
“And if you push away the ones who are left, then when they leave it won’t hurt as bad,” she said softly. “That was my modus operandi for every relationship I’ve had since I ended my relationship with Mac.”
Flack winced slightly. “Ouch.”
“Well, it was my own fault. I could have stayed in New York, made things work. But I think I made the right decision. Most days, anyway.” She sighed. “Today was not one of those days.”
“I wouldn’t think so,” he said.
She smiled slightly. “We seem to be two very damaged people,” she said softly.
“Then maybe we should stick together,” he said with a small grin. “Meet up for drinks or something while you’re here. Be damaged together.”
Her smile widened a bit. “I think I would like that very much, Don.”
“Okay, then.” He looked at his untouched beer and shoved it to the side before standing up. “Come on.”
“Where are we going?” she asked, standing up as well.
“I think I’ve had enough to drink for now. Could probably use something to eat. How about you?”
“Eating would be good,” she said with a nod. “Any idea where?”
“There’s a pizza place around the corner. That way, if we decide we need another drink, we’re not that far away.”
“Pizza sounds lovely, then,” she said with a smile before they both began to make their way through the crowd and out the door. She realized as the cold night air hit them in a blast that maybe, just maybe, she could help him get back to the man she fondly remembered. If she could, then maybe she could find some peace herself.