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"Stargazing. Breathing in the infinitesimal state of our being...and breathing out the beauty of it. The beauty that we even exist..it's almost enough to make me cry."
"Erm, you alright...?" Crowley turned his head to Aziraphale, who didn't break his eye contact with the cosmos.
"Oh, yes of course...just thinking about how small and insignificant we are in the grand scheme of things." Aziraphale sighed.
Crowley lifted himself up from his laying position and rested on his elbows, bent. "Well I mean, yeah, small and insignificant. We aren't anything but..." Aziraphale rolled his eyes and then gave a small chuckle. The sound of the chuckle gave Crowley a warmth in his cheeks.
"You know very well what I mean. Laying on the earth...looking up at the sky...it doesn't make you wonder? Wonder what life could be if we took the shots we were too afraid to take? Actually smelling those proverbial roses, as it were?”
Crowley swatted a pestering mosquito. In his attempt to lighten the mood, he quipped. “Roses? What roses? The only thing I’m smelling is you, when was the last time you showered?” He laughed and Aziraphale propped himself up with assertion.
“Oh don't be daft, I’m being serious here. I’m trying to tell you something.”
Aziraphale looked at Crowley with this fervor he had never shown before. Crowley caught wind of this and sat up, following suit. The pair had accompanied the other for so long, they lost count and Aziraphale probably could have given Crowley more credit for being able to spot where this conversation was headed.
“I know what you’re going to say, Aziraphale. And please, you don’t have to. Seriously. I still love you just the same.”
Aziraphale suddenly forgot to breathe, as if his lungs had taken leave of his body.
“Crowley..I..”
Before Aziraphale could finish, his lips were embraced by Crowley's; pouty and warm. Crowley pulled away rather quickly and saw Aziraphale adorned with a still puckered expression, eyes closed.
“Aziraphale, I know you’ve had a thing for me. I can’t remember exactly when I realized it, but I think that somehow I’ve always known. But you have to understand it from my perspective. This life we’ve created for ourselves? It’s a good life. It’s a life that others dream of living. This is a kind of companionship that others would envy. I don’t want to ruin it.”
The air in Azirphale's lungs enveloped him once again.
“You’re lying, Crowley. No one can kiss like that and not mean it. I’ve loved you ever since I knew what love even was. You are all the parts of me I wish I had. You’re every facet in my life I crave. And well…you’re just being a coward!!”
Aziraphale remained focused on the smaller framed man next to him and searched for an answer in his eyes. Silence. Then more silence. In what seemed like an indeterminate amount of time, Crowley scooted closer and smiled with a softness that further cemented the fervor coursing through Aziraphale's veins.
“A coward? Do I detect a challenge?”
Aziraphale swallowed slowly. “Yeah…you’re just…afraid…you love me.”
Crowley tucked a tuft of blonde curls behind Aziraphale’s ear and grazed his face in a way that let him know something wonderful was going to happen. In one calculated movement, Crowley leaned in and kissed Aziraphale for a second time, fully sinking in as if their lips had finally found the perfect match. He felt Aziraphale’s smile against his lips and he let out a quiet moan.
Suddenly, Aziraphale felt an almost undetectable wetness hug his cheek and pulled away. His best friend had tears in his eyes. He took a moment to grasp what was happening, for he was mesmerized by the reflection of the moon in Crowley’s gaze. The tears crystallized the galaxy in his eyes. Right then and there, Aziraphale knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that Crowley was in love with him, too.
The two men explored the other's lips, tongues dancing with each other, bodies moving closer for warmth. Aziraphale laid back down and awkwardly pulled Crowley onto his lap, chuckling. Crowley opened up the top buttons of Aziraphale’s undershirt and placed gentle kisses on his neck and chest, sending Aziraphale into a tizzy. Before they knew it, they were rocking against each other at an agonizingly slow pace.
“It’s always been you, dear. I want to show you how much I love you.” Aziraphale spoke languidly, between heaving breaths.
Crowley placed a quick peck upon his lips. “Let’s go back in the tent.”
Aziraphale smiled. “Do I detect a challenge?”