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Jungwon stood before the older male with scorn on his face. His brass knuckles covered in blood from the fights he just got out of; the fights for him– the killing for him . Jungwon didn’t get through this bloody battlefield, for this. Bile shot up his throat before he swallowed it down. He felt gross and sick to his stomach. Because the same man that would gun down anyone that so much as looked at him the wrong way, held up his very own firearm in his direction.
There was a pause. Everything went completely silent and Jungwon saw red. He clutched his brass knuckles further into his palm while feeling confusion and betrayal. But those emotions were an understatement as he took careful but angered steps in his direction. He had a lot of things to say but the only words to come out of his mouth was, “Why, Sunghoon?”
The click of his gun indicated that he took it off safety as he heard the gun cock back. He was being serious. Sunghoon didn’t budge to speak. His lips were sealed like they were sewed together by a thread; he was willingly keeping secrets and Jungwon’s heart lurched once he walked all the way to the barrel of the gun. Jungwon’s small hand wraps around the firearm as he pushes his forehead against it.
He didn’t want to believe that this was happening; how can he when this was so unlike him. The mission was over but Sunghoon always had a knack for showing his true colors at the wrongest of times.
Sunghoon shrugged and that sent Jungwon over the ledge. “There were things I haven’t been the most honest about.” he held his stance as he let his index finger play with the trigger; blowing Jungwon’s head off more internally than anything else. Jungwon breathed in like he had fiberglass in his system, clinging onto him from the inside and killing him and he hated it.
“Oh, you think?” The younger scoffed and a string of tears followed suit as he still held onto the barrel of the gun with a vice grip. “And when did you think it was a good time to tell me, huh?”
Sunghoon shook his head at the inquiry and Jungwon could’ve sworn he saw tears forming at the older’s eyes. His tear ducts were full of the clear liquid but he never once blinked them away. Maybe he thought he didn’t deserve to show vulnerability; he should’ve told him. “There was no better time than now. There was nothing I could do, Wonie.”
“Nothing you could do? Did you even try ?” And Sunghoon’s mouth gaped and then closed. “You promised me, Hoon.”
Jungwon wanted to be surprised but he saw this bitter ending a mile away. He saw a bullet through his head, he saw his life flash before him in moments that he would never forget. He saw them—but he saw them with Sunghoon. Sunghoon, Sunghoon, Sunghoon.
It was never their jobs that kept them apart, it was never Jungwon’s efforts for the older. It was because of Sunghoon that it came to this conclusion, that it came to this dreaded moment. Why did he waste so much time on him?
“I’m sorry, Wonie. I really did love you...” That was all he could register before the sound of the gun being fired rung through his ears for the last time.
Jungwon and Sunghoon were like two doves; they were docile and pure with their intentions and meanings. It was right there and then when Jungwon realized that crows infested their souls; death was all they could detect. It swallowed them whole and they would always be bittersweet.