Work Text:
"Can you pass me the sugar, honeypie?"
"..."
"I mean, other than yourself, of course."
"Stop."
"Stop what, sweet cheeks?"
"You know what."
"Would you prefer pumpkin? Snuggle muffin? ...Sexy pants?"
"I will throw this knife at you."
"You'll do nothing of the sort, Vlad."
"But, Laia—"
"No knife throwing at the dinner table. We are not savages."
"It's a butter knife."
"Vlad is too much of a doll to hurt anyone. My baby wouldn't hurt a fly."
"Alright, you win. I regret asking why Laia got all the pet names. Happy now?"
"But you brought up a valid point, my cherry pie. We need to make up for all that lost time."
"I'd rather you didn't."
"My cuddle puddle. My cutie bat. My hunka-hunka burning love."
"I hate you."
"Aw... so I'm not your favorite sun anymore?"
"I swear—"
"Can we please just have a normal meal? You're spoiling my dinner."
"...Yes, Laia."
"...Yes, swallow."
"Good. Now, apologize."
"I was just—"
"Apologize, Leo Nolan."
"...I'm sorry, Vlad."
"Accepted, love."
"Hmpf."
"...Laia? Is everything alright?"
"...How come you don't give me a pet name?!"
