Archive of Our Own ^beta

There’s always a moment, or at least Mark always feels like there’s a moment in every person’s life where they sit there and think: How the fuck did I get here?

See, Mark isn’t the best at getting his feelings across to the other person—in fact, he sucks at it. So sitting here in front of a girl who he’s only really class friends with when she’s about to tell him she has a crush on him (he’s not that oblivious, or maybe she’s just that obvious), he panics and blurts the first thing out of his mouth. 

Which leads him to believe that every person has a moment in their life, or multiple—actually, yes, multiple moments—where they ask themselves the questions: What did you just do and are you fucking stupid? 

Because Mark, being Mark, decides to tell her in a rush of words and panic, 

“I’m actually seeing someone.”

Gabrielle blinks, reeling back a little from the onslaught of words and Mark wants to slap himself because he didn’t even give her a chance to tell him she likes him. 

“Oh?” She stutters, blinking rapidly before frowning at him. “Really? Who is it?” 

“Um,” and wow, Mark is really fucking stupid. Shit, shit, shit, who would he even be dating? Who would he even be talking to?

“Jaemin Na,” he tells her, voice trailing off slightly towards the end. Shit.

“Jaemin Na?” She repeats in disbelief. “The soccer player?”

“Yep,” he strains, a horrid laugh coming out of him. “That’s the one.”

Gabrielle opens her mouth, face portraying she’s believing none of this and really, why would she? Why would Mark Lee be talking to, much less dating, Jaemin Na? 

The bell becomes to his savior and rings before she can say anything else. 

She frowns up at the ceiling as if cursing it for interrupting her confession turned interrogation, but Mark would get on his knees to praise it for getting him out of this conversation. 

“We’ll talk about this later,” she says, hiking her bag further up on her shoulder. 

“Yeah, sure, totally,” he rushes, booking it away from the lockers to his class. He rushes into the restroom, locking himself into a stall and slapping his hands to his face to suppress a groan. There’s no way this isn’t getting back to Jaemin, or worse the whole school, by the time lunch comes around. 

Because really, what the fuck did he just do?

He’s right (which, of course he’s right. He’s right 90% of the time although it only comes off as 80% because of precautions and the idea of actually being wrong) because when he gets to his car to leave for lunch and get his last period off, he sees Jaemin walking in his direction. Mark curses under his breath, tossing his bag in the back seat as quick as he can, but stops when Jaemin gets up to his car and wants nothing more than to slam himself with the car door. 

“Hey, babe.”

“What?” Mark cries, turning him with wide eyes. 

Jaemin smirks, coming to stand in front of him. “Boyfriends call each other babe, you know that, right?”

Mark’s face catches on fire and he kind of wants to slam Jaemin with the car door now. 

“I’m so sorry,” he tells him, shutting the door. “I really—I’m so sorry, I didn't mean to say that at all.” 

“Really? What did you mean to say then?”

“Not that.” Mark sighs, looking off to the side and running his hands through his hair. “There’s this girl, Gabrielle Summers, yeah, well, she likes me for whatever reason and—”

“That’s pretty understandable.”

“And, I—what?” Mark shakes his head, trying to not let the boy get to his head and fluster him even more. “Anyway, she likes me and she was trying to confess to me earlier, but I didn’t want that to happen, so I told her I was seeing someone and she asked who…and I said you?”

Jaemin still has that smile on his face as he looks at him, tilting his head to the side. “You did?”

“I did,” he confirms, twisting his fingers. “I’m so sorry.” 

Jaemin starts laughing, shaking his head at him. “It’s alright, really.” 

Mark looks away, twisting his fingers even more. “Does everyone know about it?” 

“Mm, no I don’t think so. Gabrielle just passed me a note in the middle of bio asking if we were dating,” Jaemin explains. 

Mark groans, tipping his head backwards while Jaemin starts laughing again 

“I think this is truly amusing.”

“Of course you do,” he grits, looking at the other senior. 

“This actually works perfectly,” Jaemin says with a bright grin. 

Mark furrows his eyebrows, going to ask why his horrible predicament is perfect when he sees Gabrielle behind Jaemin, walking in their direction, and shit, she’s walking to them. 

He has another one of those what the fuck are you even doing Mark Lee, just stop already moments and reaches out for Jaemin. He grabs him by the neck and shoulder, only seeing the other’s eyes widen before he presses his lips to Jaemin’s. 

He stands there for a second, trying to register what he’s even doing, and Jaemin grabs him by the hips, stumbling forwards and inadvertently pressing him to his car. Mark gasps sharply, opening his eyes to find Jaemin’s closed, and Jaemin presses his lips to his, starting to move them, and well, it’s really over right then and there. 

And why wouldn’t it be? It’s Jaemin Na, one of the heartthrobs of the school that’s really sweet and stares at you when you’re talking, and Mark is helpless, so Jaemin kissing him back reduces him to nothing. Mark doesn’t really know how long they stand there kissing (holy shit), it could’ve been hours (definitely not) or seconds (most likely), but he does know his hands find their way to Jaemin’s face and the hands on his hips tighten slightly. 

He pulls away when Jaemin opens his mouth, startling at what just happened and watching as Jaemin blinks his eyes open. They stare at each other before Mark’s face burns red and he moves away from Jaemin, getting in his car quickly and driving off before the other can do much. 

Parking in his parking spot the next day at school leaves him a whole new level of nervous that has him ready to pull back out of the parking lot to head straight home. He turns to Chenle who doesn’t even ask him if anything’s wrong. 

“Am I picking you up today from practice?” He asks as the sophomore starts getting out of the car. 

“Yeah, at normal time,” Chenle tells him, waving before getting out of the car to catch up with some of his friends. 

He sighs, hands still gripping the wheel tightly, and sinks into the seat. He stares out at the front of the school, drumming his fingers on the wheel, and then nodding and reaching down to put the car in drive. Mark barely takes his foot off before he slams right back on the brake as his door opens and Jaemin seats himself in the car with a bright grin and two coffees. 

“What the hell?!”

“Coffee?” He asks, holding the drink out to Mark and taking a sip of his own. When Mark doesn’t take it, instead staring at him in shock, he sets the drink in the cup holder. “Are you going to keep your foot on the brake or are you taking us somewhere? Oh my goodness, is this our first date? Mark!”

“What is your deal?” Mark demands, putting the car in park and turning to him. 

“We need to talk about yesterday,” Jaemin tells him. 

“What, about my issue being perfect for you?” 

“Actually, yes. I need your help.”

Mark raises an eyebrow, turning towards him more. “With what?”

"Let’s date,” Jaemin says simply, like that’s the most normal thing in the world. Although maybe it is for him. 

“What?”

“Or fake date,” he relents. “But you want to make it clear to Gabrielle you don’t like her, and I need my ex to back off and finally realize we’re over. So, let’s fake date to help both of our cases.” 

Mark blinks, thinking his words over and thinking once again: How the fuck did I get here? 

“I don’t think that’s the best idea,” he says, inching away from the other. 

“You did kiss me though when you saw Gabrielle, so it kind of already started something,” Jaemin points out, causing the other to frown. They stare at each other for a minute or two until Jaemin sighs, setting his coffee down and turning to him. “Just think about it. I help you get Gabrielle to back off, you help me get rid of my ex for good, and we keep it up for a few months before breaking up. What’s the worst that could happen?”

Mark bites his lip, turning away from Jaemin. The worst that could happen would be he catches feelings and Jaemin doesn’t feel the same, which understandable and he can deal with that mostly. He’s going off to college at the end of the year anyway. A few months doesn’t sound bad, and Mark would’ve definitely said yes to normal dating had Jaemin asked him in a normal situation. Although he did bring up dating at first, but no, back on track. 

“Alright, fine,” he eventually says, looking over at Jaemin to see the boy light up. “We’ll help each other out, but only for a few months.”

“Only for a few months,” Jaemin agrees. “You can come to a couple of my soccer games, I’ll take you out on cute dates, we’ll get the other two to back off for good, and everything will be well.”

Mark nods, looking back out at the parking lot again. “Alright, sounds good,” he breathes out, feeling the press of a headache. 

“What are you fine with for our relationship? Like boundary wise,” Jaemin asks, and Mark’s heart does a funny little flip at that keyword. 

“Anything that a normal couple does is fine,” he tells him, turning towards him. Mark then smirks at the other, feeling a little brave all of a sudden. “Do your best, Jaemin Na. Sweep me off my feet.”

“I intend to,” Jaemin replies easily, making Mark blush again. “Don’t worry, Mark Lee, I’ll be the best fake boyfriend you’ve ever had.”

Yeah, Mark doesn’t really doubt that and maybe that’s the issue. But he still nods anyway because he’s a Class A Idiot. 

“Are you ready to head inside?” Jaemin asks, moving to get out of the car. “The bell is about to ring soon.”

“Yeah, I’m coming,” he says, following him out of the car and grabbing his drink before he forgets. “Thanks for the um, coffee.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Jaemin says with a smile, walking around the car to grab his hand. Mark pulls away before he can, locking his car and putting his keys in his bag before turning to Jaemin sheepishly and grabbing his hand. The other laughs, intertwining their fingers and pulling him along. Mark takes a deep breath when they get to the doors, fingers tightening on Jaemin’s hand as they enter, but he follows him inside anyway. They attract stares and Mark tries not to think about the people looking down at him for snagging Jaemin Na even though he didn’t, but they don’t really know that. 

Honestly, it’s weird walking down the hallway with Jaemin because he says good morning to everyone, hand still locked with Mark’s, and they stop at his locker so Mark can exchange some stuff before Jaemin walks him to class. 

“I’ll see you in stats?” Jaemin asks. 

“Yeah, definitely,” Mark assures him, squeezing his hand before letting go. 

“Great.” Jaemin leans down, surprising Mark, and plants a kiss on his cheek. “I’ll see you later.”

Mark hums, not really being able to do much, and walks inside his class completely mortified as some people stare at him. But this was their plan, so it’s fine. 

It’s not like Mark isn’t thinking about how soft Jaemin’s lips are for the rest of his first period or how his heart seems to suddenly be a gymnast. Nope, not at all, he’s fine. 

Mark pulls up to the soccer fields around eight and decides to finish up some homework while he waits for Chenle to finish up. The moment he got home from school after lunch and having his last period off, he went to his room and immediately passed out. 

Being Jaemin Na’s boyfriend is tiring. 

There’s so many people to fool and Jaemin just has so many friends, although most are fans, so Mark can’t even imagine what his real partners have to deal with when they date him. Mark’s only fake dating and he crashed immediately once he got home from all of the anxiety and attention on him. 

He looks up when Chenle walks to the car, voice carrying through the windows as he talks with his teammates. He opens the door, yelling at them one last time before getting in and tossing his bag at the ground. Mark turns the AC up for him and goes to leave when someone knocks on his window and he turns to see Jaemin leaning down with his arm resting on the top of the car. He smiles when Mark rolls his window down. 

“Mark Lee, how lovely it is to see you here.”

Mark purses his lips into a smile, putting his car into park. “Why are you always stopping me right when I’m about to leave?”

“To bug you,” Jaemin tells him with a honey-sweet smile that shouldn’t have Mark’s heart picking up. 

“How sweet.”

Jaemin hums, looking over at Chenle who’s watching them curiously. “What are you two doing?”

“Going to get food,” Chenle tells him warily. 

The three of them fall into silence, Jaemin watching Chenle before turning to Mark who stares at him awkwardly, and Chenle watches the two of them, probably trying to decipher why his brother, Mark Lee, is talking to Jaemin Na. 

“Do you want to come to dinner with us?” He asks eventually, because that’s what boyfriends do, right? Ask each other to dinner, that is. 

Jaemin lights up with a smile. “I would! I’ll pay since you’re driving.”

Mark nods, turning to his brother and gesturing to the backseat. Chenle’s mouth drops open and Mark tells him to get in the back, which he does begrudgingly, glaring at Jaemin as he gets out of the car. Jaemin takes his spot, placing his bag in the backseat and Mark holds out his phone so he can put his own music on. 

“I’ll listen to whatever you have on,” Jaemin tells him. “Come on, play your music for me, Lee.”

There’s a hint of embarrassment, but he plays it anyway, keeping his window rolled down to try to keep his head from getting too fogged when Jaemin smiles over at him. The sun is mostly down as they leave and Mark turns up the music so they don’t have to speak, but the two soccer players seem too exhausted to do much of that, so it’s perfect. He glances down at Jaemin’s hand that’s resting on the center console multiple times for no reason at all other than the fact it looks nice to hold, but that’s it. 

He pulls into the parking lot of the sandwich place he and Chenle go to quite often when he has practice or Mark has guitar. The three of them get out and Jaemin holds the door open for them to walk through. He stands close to Mark as they wait in line and order, swiping his card with his chest basically pressed to Mark. 

“So, when did you two become friends?” Chenle asks when they sit down at a table. 

“Oh, we’re dating,” Jaemin tells him easily, taking a bite from his sandwich. 

“Why?” 

Mark kicks his shin, glaring over at him. Chenle gives him a look as if that’s supposed to explain it all. 

“I’m being serious? Why would you date my brother of all people?” 

“Oh my God,” Mark mutters under his breath, closing his eyes to hold back from the urge of throwing his sandwich at the little devil’s face. 

“I don’t know, I think he’s pretty cool,” Jaemin says, turning to him to study him with a glint in his eyes. 

Chenle raises an eyebrow, skepticism written all over his face. “Really? Why? Mark’s pretty boring if you ask me, I mean all he does is homework, watches this one drama, and is really annoying. Also, his only friend is like, Sunwoo Kim, which—”

“Chenle Lee,” he hisses, glaring at his brother as his face starts getting red. 

“—Sunwoo is really cool, don’t get me wrong! I love Sunwoo, but like, Mark is pretty boring if you ask me. And you’re like, super cool, and popular, so—”

“Yah! Do you want to walk to school the rest of the week?” Mark cuts in before he can say anything else, ignoring the concealed laughs coming from his side. Chenle looks at him with wide eyes and he continues on, this time in Korean. “Hm? Who drives you around everywhere? Me, so unless you want to start walking, or God forbid, take the bus, shut up, brat. Should hyung stop driving you to school and practice? Should he make you start riding with Chris? I think you’d have a lot of fun with that, hm?” 

“Okay, okay,” Chenle concedes, holding his hands up at the prospect of having to ride with the annoying freshman that looks at Chenle and Jisung with stars in his eyes. “Sorry.”

Mark hums, bringing his drink up to his lips. He turns to Jaemin to find him watching him with an expression he can’t place but has him feeling embarrassed anyway. 

“You speak Korean?” Jaemin asks. 

“Yeah, um, our parents were pretty adamant about us speaking it,” Mark tells him. 

“Ah, I learn new things about you every day,” Jaemin muses. 

“That you do. Now hurry up and eat, yeah? I want to take a shower at some point tonight.”

“Bossy.”

Mark rolls his eyes, turning to his food as Chenle starts talking about his day. Jaemin is good with Chenle. Really good, and it does more than what it should to Mark, but he really likes how Jaemin is with his little brother. He should know Jaemin is good with his brother—they are on the same team and Jaemin is just friendly, but it’s different in person. It’s doing stupid things to him and he heads to the restroom before they leave to splash water on his face. He asks Jaemin to put in his address and drives them there, staying silent while the soccer players in his car talk to each other. He pulls up to the other’s house, taking in the white family house that already has Christmas lights up despite Halloween only happening last weekend. He gets out of the car with Jaemin, meeting him at the back of the trunk to help him grab his stuff from the back. 

“Do you need a ride to school tomorrow?” Mark asks, remembering how he was complaining about his car being in the shop till the end of the week. “Or I can take you until you get your car back.”

Jaemin smiles, dropping his bag to the ground and slamming the trunk closed. Mark startles when he wraps his arms around him, humming with a smile that only shows a sliver of his teeth but still manages to light up his face with something soft and only for him if he lets himself indulge. Mark thinks it’s ridiculously cute. 

“If you don’t mind, I’ll definitely take you up on that offer.”

Mark snorts, shaking his head and grabbing onto the edges of the sleeves of Jaemin’s jersey. “I don’t mind.”

Jaemin hums again, deep in his chest to where Mark can feel it. Mark looks up at him, taking a breath in. Jaemin really is pretty. He’s known that, but like how it was watching the soccer player interact with his brother, it’s another thing to know Jaemin is pretty and see it up close. Mark moves his hands up to Jaemin’s face, cupping it softly as he runs his eyes all over the expanse of skin that’s soft under his fingers. Jaemin lets him, leaning into the touch, and allowing for Mark to get used to having him in his hold. Mark lifts himself up on his toes the inch it takes to be at the same level as Jaemin, eyes half-lidding themselves as he leans in before fully closing when his lips touch Jaemin’s. 

It’s slower this time, a simple press of lips that Jaemin deepens after a moment. He’s not as in much of a rush as before, no frantic feelings pushing him to do irrational things, but he instead maps out the feel of Jaemin’s lips. Jaemin doesn’t try to lick into his mouth this time, going at his pace because it’s been a while since Mark has dated someone and dating someone like Jaemin is a step he wasn’t expecting to take. He pulls away after some time, eyes still closed and pressed close to Jaemin to where their breaths mix. He leans back in to capture those lips that are incredibly soft and honestly, should be illegal, feeling lightheaded when Jaemin grips his lower back to pull him closer. 

"I’ll see you tomorrow?” Jaemin asks when they pull away, voice breathy. Mark nods, not trusting his own voice to serve him well, and Jaemin smiles, leaning in to kiss him again before stepping away. 

Mark catches himself before he falls forward and makes a fool of himself, saying goodnight to Jaemin and getting in his car. He waits until Jaemin opens his door and steps inside before pulling away. That was definitely not very fake-dating of them, there’s no audience to even put a show on for besides maybe his brother—but, like his brother would want to watch him kiss someone. 

Mark’s lips feel tingly for the rest of the night and he tries really hard not to lose his head over what happened.

Gabrielle catches him during his break when he’s out in the lounge with his homework spread out in front of him while he plays games on his phone. He looks up when she walks into the lounge area and quickly sets his phone down, instead exchanging it for his binder. 

“Mark,” she says, giving him a look as she sits down in the chairs across from him. 

Mark purses his lips, setting the stuff down. “Hey, Gabby, what can I do for you?”

“I wanted to give something,” she says, digging around in her bag and causing Mark’s pulse to spike.

“Oh,” he breathes, voice hinging at the end in a pitch he hates. “Um, what is it?”

“Give me a minute, it should be in here somewhere,” she says, looking around deeper in her bag. Mark watches her, taking in a steady breath as she roots around for her bag and finally pulls out a card with a bag of cookies. 

“Oh, um…”

“I didn’t really get a chance to tell you this at the beginning of the week and it’s like you’ve been avoiding me this week,” she starts, trailing off at the end and pulling a nervous laugh out of Mark. 

“No, no, not at all.” 

“Oh, okay, well!” Gabrielle lights up and Mark feels the urge to sink into the couch and possibly the ground, praying for it to swallow him whole. “I wanted to give this to you then!”

Mark looks down at her stretched out hands, staring down at the card and cookies before accepting them with shaking hands. “Thank you, um, this is really sweet! I’m sure your other friends really appreciate you making these for them as well.”

Gabrielle’s eyes widen. “Oh, I didn’t make any of my friends these.”

Mark blinks, the pit in his gut getting larger. “Oh, really…?”

“Yes, just you.”

Mark looks down at the things in his hands. “Oh, Gabrielle, I already said I was—”

“Talking to someone, yes,” she agrees, pressing her lips into a line. 

“Yes, well, now I’m actually dating them.”

Gabrielle laughs softly. “There’s no way you’re dating Jaemin Na.”

Mark frowns, sitting up a little straighter. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Because Mark, it's just odd. Not because of you, but Jaemin isn’t—”

“I appreciate the cookies, Gabrielle,” he cuts in, not wanting to hear whatever explanation she’s about to give. “And you’re really nice, but I’m with Jaemin now whether you believe it or not, and I would appreciate it if you respected that, please.” 

Gabrielle blinks rapidly, flinching a little from his tone and Mark feels a moment of guilt he lets show. 

“Babe!” 

Both of them turn to see Jaemin walking into the lounge with some of his friends with a wide smile. Jaemin takes a seat next to him on the couch while his friends fill in the other couch and chair, still deep in their conversation. 

“What are you doing here? Don’t you normally go out with Sunwoo?” He asks after kissing his cheek. 

Mark ignores the urge to ask how he knows that, instead turning to look at him. “Normally yes, but—”

“Sunwoo normally goes out with his boyfriend on Fridays for lunch,” Gabrielle cuts in, pulling their attention towards her. 

“Um, yeah,” Mark agrees, looking between the two as they stare at each other. His grip tightens on the stuff he’s holding and he shifts on the cushion. 

Finally Jaemin turns to him with a bright smile, previous hostility (?) gone. “This just means I get you to myself then!” 

“Jaemin,” he groans. He turns to Gabrielle, ignoring the menace next to him. “Thank you for the cookies, Gabrielle, was there anything else you wanted to talk about?”

Gabrielle opens her mouth and then pauses, eyes flitting over to Jaemin. She frowns momentarily and turns back to Mark. “Just read the note, please,” she says, grabbing her bag and standing up. “Um, I made the cookies from scratch last night, I hope you like them.”

Mark smiles up at her and holds them up. “I'm sure I will, thank you!”

Gabrielle nods, looking over at Jaemin again before looking back at Mark and offering a smile before she leaves. Mark watches her leave, looking down at the stuff in his hands. He flips the light blue envelope over, finding it sealed perfectly with a small heart in the middle of the tip. A hand plucks the letter from his hands, startling him, and Mark turns to find Jaemin grabbing Mark’s bag to slip it in with his other binders. 

“Let’s eat these,” he says, throwing his legs over Mark’s lap and cuddling close to him. 

Mark freezes, hands flying up as Jaemin situates himself on him and only when Jaemin gently pulls his arms down to grab the cookie bag does he relax. 

“You know, you’re really great,” Jaemin whispers, resting his head on the couch by Mark’s shoulder. 

Mark looks over at him in surprise. “What?”

Jaemin doesn’t say anything, instead offering an earbud and pulling up a show that he’s watching. Mark takes the earbud, feeling all tingly and warm while Jaemin rests against him. 

Mark gets used to being Jaemin Na’s (fake) boyfriend easily and quickly. 

Mostly because Jaemin makes it really easy by buying him a coffee every Friday morning and walking him to class for a majority of his periods, but also because Mark ends up really liking being around him. Because Jaemin is actually really quiet and has these random spurts of energy when they’re alone, scaring Mark half of time into believing the boy has gone insane, and because Jaemin walked in on him dancing to this girl group his mom used to listened to in college, and instead of making fun of him, he joined with even more enthusiasm than Mark. Because Jaemin is really smart and shares with Mark that he wants to become a surgeon when they’re sharing a milkshake and fries at the drive through one night, and in turn, Mark tells him how he wanted to be an author, but he thinks he’s going to become a nurse like his dad. 

“Why not follow what you want to do?” Jaemin asks, turning in his seat to look at him. 

Mark hums, dipping some fries in the shake to think about it as he chews. “I don’t know, it’s kind of a risky job, and I like helping people, so being a nurse seems pretty cool. Maybe I’ll shoot higher in college, but my dad was a nurse and it kind of feels like a tribute to him as well. Chenle definitely wants to follow mom as a lawyer unless he gets drafted to the NBA, but like that’s going to happen.” 

Jaemin laughs at that, leaning his head against the seat to look at him. “Maybe we’ll work at the same hospital and you’ll be my favorite nurse.”

Mark blushes, looking away from him and shaking his head. “Yeah, maybe.”

They both end up having family come in for Thanksgiving, but Jaemin picks him up later that night and takes him to get hotdogs from the convenience store because, “they’re literally heaven, Mark, I don’t think you understand.”

“You’re going to shit your brains out.”

“Then at least I’ll go out heroically.”

Mark’s aunt prods a little too much about where he went when he gets home and finds all of them in the living room. He tells her he was just out with a friend, sending a sharp look to Chenle, and his savior comes in the form of his mom telling her to stop asking. His aunt proceeds to say go on about how it’s good to be open with family and if Mark has a girlfriend, then he shouldn’t be embarrassed but she should come from a good family and be well-mannered, but her marriage is also a failure so Mark takes her words with a grain of salt. 

He also strategically avoids Gabrielle at school—well, to the best of his abilities because he shares five classes with her and biology becomes real awkward when Mark is subjected to the weird staring contests Jaemin and Gabrielle get into across the lab.  

“Mark Lee,” Sunwoo calls, sitting down next to him during break with Haknyeon. “Did you bring your mom’s sweet potato casserole?” 

Mark sighs, pulling the dish from the extra bag he brought. He takes the top off and pulls out some forks for them. “You’re lucky Chenle didn’t get into it earlier.”

“I so am,” Sunwoo agrees, taking a bite instantly and humming at the taste. 

Haknyeon laughs when his boyfriend leans into him, taking a fork for himself. “How have you been, Mark?”

“Pretty good,” he tells him, scooting closer to eat some as well. “Busy mostly.”

“Oh, and you’re dating Jaemin, right?” He asks, looking up at him. 

Mark blushes slightly, still not used to that after a little over a month of dating. “Yeah, we are.”

“How’s that been?”

“Pretty good, actually. He’s sweet.”

“I’m just surprised you even managed to bag Jaemin,” Sunwoo says, finally looking up from stuffing his face. “I mean, I am your only friend basically, and you didn’t even tell me about it!”

“You go back to eating, you ass,” Haknyeon tells him, shoving his face back down. 

“I have plenty of friends, Sunwoo Kim. Watch it.”

Sunwoo huffs, rolling his eyes, but he doesn’t say anything else.

“I’ve always wondered what it would be like dating Jaemin,” Haknyeon muses, ignoring the huff his boyfriend lets out. 

“Like I said, he’s really sweet,” Mark tells him. “And very weird. And I mean very weird.”

Haknyeon starts laughing. “What do you mean very weird?” 

“The other day he spent ten minutes ranting about inflation and how the economy has gone to shit since 2008,” Mark tells them, throwing his hands up. “I was seriously questioning everything.”

Sunwoo and Haknyeon stare at him with varying faces that Mark agrees with. 

“He’s…” Sunwoo trails off, meeting Haknyeon’s eyes before turning back to Mark and saying, “he’s kind of a nerd.”

“I know. Definitely was not expecting that.” 

“That’s cute though,” Haknyeon tells him, proceeding to make him blush even though he’s not talking about him. 

Mark shifts the conversation away and they make it through half of the container before Jaemin comes into the lounge, smiling brightly when he sees Mark. 

“Hey, babe,” he says, sitting down next to him. He grabs Mark’s fork that he’s holding, taking the bite he prepared for himself and humming in delight, turning to the other two afterward and greeting them, looking back at Mark afterward. “I have to go run some errands, but I was thinking I could come over later and we could watch some movies?”

“Yeah, that sounds good,” he agrees, trying to register why exactly Jaemin would do that when there’s no one to really fool at his house besides Chenle. But it could also be because of Sunwoo and Haknyeon. Jaemin beams at him and kisses him, surprising Mark and rendering him unable to think any further. 

“Great,” he says, pecking his lips again before pulling away. “I’ll text you when I’m on my way over. Bye, guys!”

The three of them watch as Jaemin walks away and Mark blushes when his friends look at him, telling them to shut up and packing up his stuff to leave while Sunwoo starts laughing at him. It’s really hard to concrete during his last period because Jaemin has kissed him in public before, but only on the cheek and really, this is a major step up in their fake relationship. Except that’s what it is, a fake relationship, so Mark forces that to become his new mantra when he gets out for senior release and heads home. He tosses his bag to the side, not even bothering with it because it’s Friday, and instead crawls in his bed to sleep because really, between school and Jaemin, his head is done for. 

He wakes to someone calling him and when he checks it, the clock is nearing seven and Jaemin is calling him for the seventh time. He gets out of bed, grabbing a hoodie on his way down and repeating the fact they’re in a fake relationship as he goes to let Jaemin inside. He opens the door to find Jaemin holding his phone to his ear, eyes wide as he stares at him, and then the other smiles and starts laughing, setting the grocery bag he’s holding down to walk closer to him. Mark looks at him in confusion when Jaemin cups his cheeks, still giggling down at him. 

“You, dear, are absolutely precious when you wake up,” he says, voice unbearably sweet and Mark groans, tugging him inside and grabbing the bag he brought in. 

“What’d you get?” He asks, unloading it in the kitchen. 

“Just some ramen and snacks,” Jaemin tells him, arms circling his waist as he stands behind him. 

Mark would normally lose himself, and he’ll definitely freak out later about it, but he’s still trying to wake up from the dead and Jaemin feels too good to not lean into the hold. Jaemin hums, deep in his chest like always and it feels too comforting to feel the low timbre, turning his head to start kissing Mark’s neck softly. Mark has the distant thought that the house is completely empty, there’s no one to put a show on for, and feels the loss when Jaemin pulls away, but it’s not a complete loss when Mark turns around to have Jaemin lift him up on the counter, standing between his legs and kissing him again. 

Mark really needs to stop being so susceptible to Jaemin and his kisses, but Jaemin kisses like what Mark thinks is elegance and passion at the same time, what’s warm and lovable and fine wine, and he really doesn’t mind it, instead bringing his hands up to Jaemin’s face and opening his mouth up when his tongue prods at his lips. It’s easy to get lost in this and it’s only when the front door opens does he pull away, the sound of his brother filtering through that has him getting down from the counter. Chenle doesn’t spare them a second glance as he heads to the fridge to pull food out and take it upstairs, so Mark heads to the living room to set up a movie while Jaemin starts cooking the ramen. 

“What are we watching?” He asks a while later, coming out with two steaming bowls of ramen and the bag he brought. 

Mark looks up from where he’s sat on the floor in front of the coffee table, helping him set everything down. “I haven’t decided yet.” 

Jaemin takes the remote from him and they spend ten minutes trying to find a movie to watch, bickering over what it is and going back-and-forth before deciding on a TV show they’ve both been wanting to watch. Mark enjoys it thoroughly and pulls Jaemin up to the couch to lay down once they’ve finished eating, the other laying on top of him so Mark can comb his fingers through his hair. 

“I seriously don’t understand why he felt the need to tell her,” he says at some point. Jaemin hums lazily and Mark looks down to find his eyes closed, laughing at that and shifting a little. “Are you asleep?”

“I’m comfy,” Jaemin mumbles, drowsiness evident in his voice. Mark chuckles again and moves his hand down to run his fingers over Jaemin’s shoulders and down his back. 

"The next time you come over I’ll cook for you,” Mark tells him, keeping his eyes on the TV.

“Sexy.”

Mark pinches him in the side and Jaemin laughs, propping his chin up to look up at him afterward. Mark meets his eyes, chest constricting at the eye contact, but Jaemin smiles lazily and rests his head back on Mark’s chest. He falls asleep soon afterward, not surprising Mark in the slightest, and Mark follows soon after him, turning on his side a little and pressing Jaemin to the back of the couch. 

“Mark, honey.”

Mark groans lightly, turning and peeling his eyes open to find his mom looking at him with a fond but curious smile. 

"It’s getting late. Do you want to wake your friend up?”

Mark sits up, Jaemin’s arms falling from his waist and he looks down at the other, rubbing at his eyes. His mom steps back as he tries to wake the other up to no success. She laughs softly, pulling out a blanket to drape over them, and tells him to go back to sleep. Mark nods, telling her goodnight and settling back down on the couch after. 

“What was that?” Jaemin asks, squinting his eyes open. 

Mark shakes his head, turning the TV off and curling back up next to him. Jaemin wraps an arm around him, eyes already closing. 

"Don’t worry about it, Jaem, just go back to sleep,” he whispers, tucking into his neck and falling asleep soon after. 

Mark’s mom makes breakfast for them the next morning and meets Jaemin. Mark watches in fascination and fear at how quickly Jaemin wins her over, the two of them bonding over interior design and genuine smiles on both of their faces, making Mark feel a little too overwhelmed. Chenle and him stay quiet for most of the breakfast and when Jaemin leaves, his mom invites him back over for dinner whenever he’s free and Mark feels a piece of him die. 

She then turns to him afterwards and sits down, face blank and Mark starts fiddling with his fingers. 

“I like him, Mark, he’s really sweet,” she says. “Maybe next time ask me if your boyfriend can stay the night before having him.”

“I will, I swear, that was an accident,” he rushes. “And yeah, he is really sweet. I, um, like him a lot.”

And Mark does like Jaemin a lot (whether it’s strictly platonic or not is up for debate because Mark doesn’t think friends kiss each other like that) and Jaemin is sweet. Really sweet, sometimes a little too much to chew on and that’s when Mark had to take a cold, hard bite of reality that’s reminding him they’re only faking this whole thing. 

Jaemin becomes a lot more touchy after that, if Mark even thinks that’s possible, but it’s also not like Mark minds it that much. Although he does steer Jaemin away from his house as much as he can. Gabrielle does try to push one more time, but that gets shut down when she catches Jaemin pressing him to the lockers once senior release starts, startling Mark so bad he bangs his head into the metal. 

Jaemin steps back, eyes wide as Mark grabs onto the back of his head and curses. “Mark, are you good?” He asks, hands hovering around him. 

"Shit, yeah, I’m fine,” he says, rubbing the back of his head and turning to the girl, trying not to let any agitation slip into his voice when he asks her what she needs. 

“I was just, um, wondering if you did the stats homework,” she says, trailing off with a fierce blush dotting her cheeks that Mark can relate to greatly. “I um, I didn’t understand the back page, but I can come back later.”

Mark glances at Jaemin to find the other watching her with a blank face and turns back to Gabrielle. “I’m free tomorrow morning if that’s fine,” he tells her, his words coming out more as a question than anything. 

Gabrielle nods quickly, glancing over at Jaemin again before gripping the paper in her hands tighter. “Yes! Tomorrow works for me. Do you want to just meet in Mrs. Stokes’ room?”

“Yeah, that works.” 

Gabrielle nods, pressing her lips together before telling them bye and leaving with her head down. Mark watches her go, turning to Jaemin when he grabs his hand and starts pulling him in the opposite way. 

“She seems to be getting the hint,” Jaemin notes, looking over at him. 

“Yeah, I think she is,” he agrees, pushing the front door open. “Which speaking of, has your ex backed off? I don’t think I’ve even been around Ethan or anything to show him you’re over him.” 

“Yeah, I know. I think it’s fine,” he says, looking over at him as they walk through the parking lot. “I don’t know, I don’t share any classes with him and I’m either with you or my team, so there’s not many opportunities to talk to him. But people talk about us, so hopefully that’s enough to show him I’m done with our relationship.” 

Mark’s heart picks up at the fact Jaemin either spends his time with him or his team, but crushes that away and instead nods, turning to Jaemin after with a smile. Jaemin looks at him, his own smile blooming on his face. 

“Okay, so Christmas next week, right?” He asks, nodding when Jaemin nods. “So we’re going up to see my family before Christmas, but my mom doesn’t like spending Christmas Day with them, so we’re coming home Christmas Eve, but anyway. She wants to know if you would like to come over for dinner on Christmas Day. I completely understand that you’re probably going to be busy with your family, so if not, it’s completely fine. But it’s just going to be mom, Chenle, and a few of her work friends that don’t have anywhere to go for the holidays. Still, even if you only want to stop by for an hour, my mom would really like that, but I know—”

"Mark,” Jaemin interrupts, holding back a laugh that has Mark flushing when he realizes he’s been rambling. “I’ll come, I promise. My family doesn’t really do that much as it is. I think they were thinking about ordering in and watching some movies, so I doubt they’ll care if I come over.”

Mark takes in a deep breath, nodding at those words. Jaemin isn't really that much taller than him, only having about an inch on him, and Mark takes advantage of this to steal a kiss from him. It’s the first time he’s initiated something like this and when he pulls away, he really likes Jaemin’s wide eyes and shy smile that compliments the blush on his cheeks. 

It makes him smile goofily and he opens Jaemin’s car door, telling him he’ll text him when dinner is and watching Jaemin fumble over himself. He kisses Jaemin’s cheek, shutting the door after and walking to his own car to head home. His mom is home early when he gets home and she lights up at the idea of Jaemin coming over for Christmas dinner, turning it into the only thing she can talk about for the next week, asking him if Jaemin has any allergies, and “Mark, make sure to ask if there’s anything he wants me to specifically cook for him.” 

She’s practically buzzing by Christmas Eve and Mark has to stop her before they can enter their family’s house, asking her to not say anything to them because he doesn’t need the headache of his family knowing when Jaemin and him are only going to break up in a few months. It’s a hard pill to swallow for the night, the idea of breaking up with Jaemin eventually because they’re fake dating and Mark can really only hope they at least stay friends afterward. 

Christmas Day is a whirlwind of emotions that have Mark feeling everything from annoyance at his brother waking him up too early, happiness when he opens his gifts, bittersweet but joyful when his mom opens the new set of casserole dishes he and Chenle got her since their dad’s were mostly broken at this point and no longer usable, and anxious when it starts nearing dinner time and he’s stuck in the kitchen. Some of Mark's mom’s friends come over and he’s in the middle of taking the stuffing out of the oven when he hears the telltale sign of Jaemin’s voice at the front. He turns to see the boy walk in with his mom, a dish held in one hand and bags in the other, and smiles when he meets his eyes. 

"Hey, babe,” he greets, kissing Mark’s cheek and setting the dish down. He holds up the bags, turning to Mark’s mom to ask, “where could I put these?”

Mark watches him leave with his mom to the living room and she introduces him to her friends. Chenle slides up next to him, picking out of the bowl Mark is using and causing him to smack at his hand. 

“Go away.”

“Happy your boyfriend is here for the holidays?” He asks, leaning against the counter. 

“Yes, very happy. Over filled with joy even,” he tells him in a distracted rush, trying to plate the stuffing and bats Chenle’s fingers away again. “Start grabbing some plates and silverware to take to the dining room,” he tells him, checking the first oven again to see the marshmallows on his mom’s sweet potato casserole still white.  

He walks into the living room, waiting until there’s a pause in the conversation to turn to his mom. 

“Okay, I put the stuffing in a casserole dish and put the lid on top to keep it warm, but the marshmallows on the casserole aren’t golden yet and when do you want me to take the ham out?” He asks, bringing a hand up to tap his fingers against his lips. “Oh, and Chenle is getting out plates and what not right now. Was there anything else we needed to put in dishes, or is everything good? And when did you want to start taking everything out to the dining room?”

His mom blinks and then excuses herself to the kitchen to see everything for herself. He goes to follow, but Jaemin grabs his hand and drags him to the front hallway, silencing Mark’s words with his lips. He melts into it easily and then hears his mom ask Chenle for a spoon and snaps out of it, setting his hands on Jaemin’s shoulders and pulling away. 

“Wait,” he says, pulling away only to have Jaemin chase him, connecting their lips again. Mark smiles, hands tightening on his shoulders and then he forcefully pulls away, stopping the other with his hands. “I need to help my mom.” 

“She can handle it for five minutes,” Jaemin says with a smile, pushing Mark’s fringe from his face before cupping his head gently. “Plus, you never even said hello to me. How rude of you.”

Mark pulls his face away when Jaemin pinches his cheek, staring up at him before huffing and grabbing him by the sides. Jaemin smiles when Mark tugs him toward him, sealing their lips in yet another kiss. Jaemin brings both hands up to his face, tongue moving so skillfully to where Mark loses his head a little, but he always loses his head when Jaemin kisses him. It’s a natural side effect at this point, something he should probably get checked out. 

Mark bites a little on his lip, relishing the soft hiss Jaemin lets out, hands sliding down to hold him by the hips with a tighter grip. They both startle when the front door opens and the last of his mom’s friends walk in. 

“Woah, okay!” Janessa exclaims, staring at them with wide eyes. 

Mark blushes furiously, Jaemin hiding in his shoulder with his hands to his face. 

“No, don’t worry, we won’t say anything,” she assures them, walking in with two of their other coworkers. “We’ll just go to the kitchen.”

Mark gives her a tight smile, blushing even more when she sends him a wicked smile and looks over at Jaemin, who’s now sporting a fierce blush. 

“Introduce me to him soon, huh?” She whispers, winking afterward. “He’s a little cutie.”

“Oh my god,” Mark whispers, turning away from her. They wait until the three go to the kitchen before turning to each other. 

“There’s always someone interrupting us, I swear,” Jaemin tsks, pressing his fingers to his cheeks. 

Mark rolls his eyes, pinching him lightly. “I blame this on you, you horndog.”

“Always for you, baby,” he says with a greasy wink that has Mark laughing, hugging him and pressing him to the wall. Jaemin’s arms circle around his shoulders, one hand coming to press his fingers to his cheek to try to cool it down when Mark pulls back a little. 

“Thank you,” he whispers, meaning it fully and feeling now more at ease than he has all day. 

Jaemin gives him a soft smile, sweet as always but more serene and not any less genuine. “Of course.”

Mark leans forward to kiss him again, more slowly this time and reminding him too much of their first real kiss outside of Jaemin’s house. He pulls away after a moment, smiling at the other and dragging him to the kitchen to help set the table. 

“Jaemin, are you going on the school skiing trip?” His mom asks, handing Mark the casserole. 

“Oh, I forgot about that,” Mark says to himself, turning to look at the other who takes the stuffing dish. 

“I am!” 

“How fun! Mark is going on it,” she says, looking over at him. Jaemin smiles over at him and Mark shrugs. “It’ll be a lot of fun, you two will enjoy it a lot.”

“Mom,” Chenle cuts in, shaking his head dramatically. “I can’t believe you're going to let Mark go off to basically have sex the whole week.”

“Oh my God,” Mark mutters, adjusting his hold on the dish. “Can we go have dinner?”

Jaemin snorts, following him out of the kitchen while his mom slaps his brother with a rag, telling him, “I’d trust his ass more than yours!”

“Mom!”

He shares a look with Jaemin across the table as they set the dishes down. 

“Well,” Jaemin starts with a laugh. “Dinner will be fun.”

Mark gives a strained smile before laughing at the absurdity. Yes, a fun dinner it definitely will be. 

Mark holds his hot chocolate tumbler closer to his chest, shivering while he waits with Sunwoo and Haknyeon outside of the bus. Sunwoo curses for the fifth time, bringing his hands up to his mouth and rubbing them together. 

“When is the bus being opened, my goodness it’s too cold for this,” he complains, glaring over at the teachers. Haknyeon takes his hands in his, trying to warm them up and then rubbing his hands on Sunwoo’s arms. 

“I don’t know, but it needs to be soon,” Mark mumbles, looking around. 

His eyes land on Jaemin as he arrives with some of his teammates, splitting off from them to walk over to him. 

“Hey, babe,” he greets, leaning down to kiss his cheek. He frowns when he pulls away, taking Mark’s scarf to bring further up around his face. “Your cheeks are freezing.”

“That’s because it’s cold as balls and they haven’t opened up the bus yet,” he grumbles, bending down to grab the other tumbler he brought of hot chocolate. “Here.”

Jaemin coos, earning an eye roll from Mark and he turns away towards his friends. Jaemin hands the tumbler to him, telling him he’s going to take their bags to the trunk. They stand around for a few minutes before the bus doors finally open up and Sunwoo lets out a sound of relief, walking off quickly to get in line with the rest of their class. 

“Hey, Mark,” Gabrielle greets, walking up to him. She looks over at Sunwoo and Haknyeon who look away quickly. “How’s your break been?”

“Pretty good,” he says, smiling at her. “We’ve mostly just been at the house and went to some family’s. What about yours?”

“We went to D.C. for a few days to see family,” she tells him, shrugging slightly. “Not much has really been going as well, so I’m really excited for this.”

“Me too, it’ll be fun.”

“Yeah, it will,” she agrees, looking down at the ground. Mark watches her tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, seeming to prepare herself to speak and he braces himself when she looks back up at him. “Are you sitting with anyone on the ride up?”

“Oh, yeah,” he breathes, looking over at his friends who are doing a very good job at hiding that they’re listening in. “Jaemin and I already planned on sitting together.” 

Gabrielle closes her mouth, staring at him with a neutral face. “You two are really dating, huh?”

“Yeah, we are,” he says, finding his unease coming more from the idea of hurting her feelings and less from admitting that so easily. They stand there for a moment, neither speaking, and Mark goes to apologize, but Jaemin comes back to stand next to him. 

“Ready to go?” He asks, nodding towards the gap in the line. He takes the tumbler from Mark’s hand, instead replacing it with his own. 

Mark looks up at him to meet his eyes and then glances at Gabrielle to see her already walking away. “I’ll see you later, Gabby!” 

Gabby gives a small smile and wave, heading towards her friends, and Mark lets out a sigh, turning to Jaemin. He raises an eyebrow when he finds the other smiling down at him softly. 

“What?”

“Nothing, you’re just sweet,” he says, leaning down to peck him on the lips. Mark catches him by the cheek, kissing him again and a little deeper before pulling him to follow Sunwoo and Haknyeon on the bus. They find a seat towards the back near Jaemin’s teammates and Mark’s friends take the seats in front of them. Jaemin stretches out when he sits down, leaning his back against the window before throwing his legs over Mark’s lap. Mark turns to look at him, giving him a look that Jaemin smiles at. He bends down to dig around in his bag before pulling out his binder to take out the work his bio teacher gave them over the break. 

“Mark Lee,” Jaemin tsks, shaking his head. “You haven’t finished that yet.”

“Ah, no,” he sighs, flipping through the packet. “I’m almost done with it.”

Jaemin hums, laying down on the seat to get comfortable, and Mark sets his work down on his legs to get started while the bus leaves. He gets halfway through it before he finally gives into the sleepiness crawling at the edges of his eyes, stuffing the stuff in his bag before turning to Jaemin and laying down on him slowly. Jaemin looks up at him curiously, but lifts his arm and holds his book out to let Mark get comfortable, his hand going to the back of his head when Mark tucks into his neck. He sighs, hand circling around Jaemin’s torso to hold onto him and it doesn’t take long to fall asleep. 

Jaemin wakes him up when they’re pulling into the facility and Mark stretches, trying to wake up fully. By the time they get checked into the resort and settle into their rooms (Jaemin tries bribing Sunwoo to switch with him, but Mark kicks him out before Sunwoo can do something stupid like agree), there's enough time for them to go to the slopes for a few hours before dinner. Mark strapshis boot in and shuffles behind Sunwoo and Hakneyon to get in line. Jaemin comes up to him with Jeno, the two of them falling into line behind them. 

“Oh, God, Mark, you never told us your boyfriend and his friend were skiers,” Sunwoo groans, scrunching his nose up. 

Mark snorts, turning to Jaemin while he straps his gloves on tighter. “Sorry, you’re going to have to get a different lift.”

“Oh, really?” Jaemin asks, clicking his goggles onto his helmet and settling them on the top of his head. Mark hums, trying to adjust the straps of his helmet and failing. “This feels discriminatory,” he notes, replacing Mark’s hands with his own. 

“Well, we’re going to be doing a bunch of tricks if you guys want to join us,” Hakneyon tells them, scooting forward in the line. 

“Oh, yeah, for sure.”

The five of them wait in line until they get to the lift, and when they get to the top, he heads off to the side for the others to come. Mark puts his goggles down and pushes towards the edge, strapping his other boot in before getting a momentum going before and falling down the slope with Haknyeon and Suwnoo on the sides of him. Sunwoo cuts in front of him easily, barreling down the mountain with the rest of them behind him. Haknyeon laughs as he comes up next to Mark and the two of them cheer when Jeno cuts in front of them. He turns around to find Jaemin riding behind them peacefully, making smooth curves, and Mark waves at him when he looks up before turning to look in front of them as the course with tricks starts coming up. 

“Mark!” Sunwoo shouts, falling behind the skiers and pointing to a ramp. 

Haknyeon and him follow them to it. Sunwoo goes first, performing a backflip that has him cheering. Mark laughs, gaining speed as he comes up to the ramp and throwing his shoulder back when he goes up in the air. He flips through the air, not totally a backflip but not a spin, and those brief seconds of zero gravity before he free falls is heaven to him. He lands smoothly, turning to watch Haknyeon perform the same trick. They head to the next ramp for some more, weaving in and out of each other as they work their way down the mountain. Jaemin falls in front of them at some point with Jeno, so Mark takes the opportunity to come up behind him and spray him with some snow before laughing and riding towards the poles where Sunwoo is. He hops up onto it after his friend, losing his footing a little when he lands. He stops, not getting a chance to get his bearings together before essentially, an avalanche covers him, knocking him off his feet due to shock more than anything. Jaemin laughs as he passes by and Mark smiles, getting up and following him down. 

“Those tricks you guys were doing were really cool,” he says when they sit on the lift to go up again, this time just the two of them with the others in front. “Where’d you learn them from.”

“My parents are big into snowboarding,” Mark tells him, looking down at all of the people below them. “I think Sunwoo and Hakneyon just learned from trial and error mostly. What about you? Do you know any tricks?”

“A few, yeah,” Jaemin says with a small shrug, smiling over at him. “Want to race?”

Mark smiles over at him, an edge to it as competitiveness starts rising in him. “Obviously.”

Jaemin tips his head back in laughter and Mark thinks he looks beautiful, but when they get to the top, he pushes those feelings aside to follow him to the edge of the mountain. The two of them get situated, deciding whoever makes it to the bottom wins and has to give the other their dessert from dinner. They count off together before pushing off and flying down the mountain, weaving in and out of each other, laughing occasionally. Jaemin starts dying when Mark almost takes out a kid, veering too far from him. 

“Kick his ass, Mark Lee!” Haknyeon shouts when he passes, heading back towards Jaemin and cutting in front of him. 

The bottom starts getting closer and Mark pushes forwards, almost riding in a straight line as he starts gaining speed despite the slow sign. He gets to the bottom first with Jaemin right behind him, turning around to cheer and instead getting tackled to the ground as Jaemin barrales into him. He falls to his back, holding the other and groaning before laughing and taking off his goggles. 

“Upset you lost?” He teases. 

Jaemin pouts down at him but starts giggling, rolling off of him to sit next to him. “I demand a rematch later.”

“Sure, babe, but the results are going to be the same.”

Jaemin pushes him back down to the ground, standing up while Mark starts laughing at him. 

Mark ends up only taking half of Jaemin’s dessert, only pretending to relish in his little victory until he gets a pout out of Jaemin and can cover it with his own lips. 

It’s weird how comfortable they’ve gotten—he’s gotten—with being affectionate towards each other, especially when this is only supposed to be a temporary thing, something to help them both out. Mark knows there’s a curl of something that’s pushing past their agreement, but he holds it back and channels that restless energy to go back out to the slopes. He can’t let this fuzzy feeling, this happy and warm feeling cloud his judgment too much, because as much as he enjoys this, enjoys Jaemin, it’s temporary and he’ll probably move on to someone he actually likes when they call it off. It leaves a bitter taste in Mark’s mouth when he thinks about it, causing him to wipe out so badly he tumbles a few feet, legs getting caught up and board digging into the snow.  

“Holy shit, Mark!”

Mark coughs, rolling onto his back and taking his goggles off. Jaemin comes to a stop next to him, spraying snow over him and bending down. 

“What hurts?” He asks, helping him sit up carefully. 

“My ass,” he says, cursing some more. 

“What about your legs? Arms? Back? What about your lower back?” Jaemin fires off, eyes concerned as he pats down Mark’s body and earns a head shake every time. He grabs onto Mark’s neck, twisting it to the side and asking for any pain, turning it the other way afterward and then crossing each arm to see if Mark feels anything. He huffs, sitting back on his butt. “Just take a moment. Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m good, Jaem, I’m good,” he assures, squeezing his leg. Jaemin nods and they sit there until a skier comes past them, deciding to get up and head back to the lodge. 

Jaemin drops him off at his room, telling him he’s going to teach him to ski tomorrow and earning a groan, but he doesn’t let Mark protest. Mark walks into the room once he leaves, finding Sunwoo passed out on his bed, not even under the covers and only in a pair of pajama pants. He shakes his head, setting his board to the side and helping his friend under the covers, heading to the shower afterward. The water is hot when he gets in, almost scolding and causing goosebumps to break out across his skin, but it feels nice when he rubs out the ache in his muscles, thinking back to Jaemin’s hands skirting over his coat for any injury but still warm enough for Mark to feel through his coat despite the snow that got caught up in his clothes. 

Mark sighs roughly, turning to stare up at the ceiling. 

Jaemin stops by the next morning when Mark gets out of the shower, pants hanging low on his hips and a towel in his hair. He grins, grabbing Mark by the hips to push him further into the room and shut the door. 

“Sexy.”

Mark rolls his eyes but lets himself be pushed onto the bed, indulging for this moment before he has to get back to reality. But in the safety of his hotel room with Jaemin pressed warm to him, he lets himself lose grip over reality to fall into Jaemin’s lips. 

“There’s no one here to put a show on for,” he mumbles, turning his head to the side as Jaemin presses soft kisses to his neck, hands trailing up and down Mark’s torso. 

“I know,” he agrees, voice a low rumble. “I like holding you though.”

That has Mark’s eyebrows drawing together, hands clenching harder on Jaemin’s arms. Jaemin leans up, cupping his face to look down at him, and there’s something truthful about his gaze, leaving Mark to wonder what he wants to mean by those words and if it’s what Mark wants him to mean.

He grabs the back of Jaemin’s neck, pulling him down to meet his lips. Jaemin’s hand tightens on his waist, the other sliding down to meet it, and Mark whines high in his throat, losing his grip completely. Jaemin smiles into his neck, mouthing at it in a way that leaves Mark’s head fuzzy, like he’s being suspended underwater and the only thing he can focus on is Jaemin’s touch that’s like honey. 

“I’ve never done this before,” Mark says, pulling away breathlessly. “Well, there was a handjob or two but that’s like it.”

Jaemin snorts, tipping his head down where his fringe brushes Mark’s forehead. He looks at Mark, stealing another kiss from him that Mark lets him have easily. “Let’s just keep doing this, yeah?” 

Mark nods, kissing the other when he leans down. Jaemin pulls away after a moment, looking up at him with a glimmer in his eyes. 

“I’ve never done that before either.”

Mark blinks, trying to process those words. “What?”

Jaemin smirks, leaning down to start kissing his neck and well, Mark really doesn’t have enough brain power to keep thinking. 

They make it out of the hotel room an hour later after talking for half an hour and reminding Mark of the friendship they’ve cultivated through this whole thing. Jaemin gets some rental skis for him and tries to teach him for the remainder of the day, something he does fine at even if his skis get caught in the snow too many times when he tries to turn. Jaemin laughs at him through all of his falls, always there to pick him up after laughing his ass off while Mark groans, cooing at how cute he is and causing the other to blush. By the end of the day before dinner, he’s at least able to do some basic tricks that he mostly wipes out on, but it’s something. He grabs his snowboard after dinner and when he finally finishes, he tells Jaemin over a cup of hot chocolate that he’s teaching him how to snowboard. Jaemin hums, sighing that he guesses that’s only fair. 

Mark smiles at that and the next day they head out to the slopes. He thinks Jaemin does worse than him at this and after lunch, he refuses to go back, complaining at the bruises he’s most likely going to have and drags him to the snow tubing side of the resort. They have more fun at that, Jaemin sitting in front of Mark, back pressed to his chest as they slide down the mountain on their tube and try not to hit people. During dinner, Gabrielle comes up to them with a hesitant smile and the hand Jaemin has around his waist tightens. 

Mark ignores it in favor of looking up at her. “Hi, Gabby, what’s up?” 

“Um, I was wondering if we could talk,” she says in a quiet voice, keeping her firmly trained on him. 

Mark nods, removing himself from Jaemin’s hold with a squeeze to his hand, and follows her off to the side away from people. 

“What’s up?”

“I just wanted to tell you that I’m really happy for you,” she says, giving him another small smile. “You and Jaemin seem really happy.” 

“Thank you,” he says, ignoring the weird curling in his gut at her words. “I’m sorry—” 

“Please don’t apologize,” she says. “I’m the one that needs to be apologizing, and so I will: I’m sorry for not taking your hint the first time and pestering you into reciprocating my crush on you after you two already started dating. That wasn’t cool at all and I just hope we can still be friends.”

Mark laughs softly. “Of course we can.”

“Good, because I might cry if I have to work with Nathan any longer in bio.” The two of them laugh and then Gabrielle takes a step forward. “Is it alright if I hug you? I’ve missed you, Mark.”

“Of course,” he whispers, pulling her into a hug. She squeezes him and then lets go, a new smile on her face that’s more bright and carefree. “Have a good rest of your trip, Gabby.”

“You too!”

They head off in separate ways and Mark smiles over at Jaemin when he turns to him, assuring him he’s fine, but there’s a sick feeling surfacing in him when he thinks back to Gabrielle complimenting their relationship. It feels sharp and full of hard edges, contrasting the soft feelings he felt for the past week, well really, the past two months. It leaves him confused, more so when Jaemin smiles over at him, all sweet and serene, and Mark has to wash the taste out with water. 

The next day while Jaemin hangs out with Jeno, he goes to the slopes to see if he can find Sunwoo or Haknyeon, but he doesn’t really want to interact with them anyway. Jaemin dropped him off at his room last night, asking again if he was okay, and Mark told him yes, letting Jaemin kiss him on the cheek like normal and then locking himself in the bathroom. He shuffles to the front to get on the lift and when he sits, he’s surprised to see another person next to him. They look at each other and the other gasps, a hand coming up to his mouth as he looks behind him as laughter rings out. 

“Oh shit, I’m so sorry,” they say, voice too familiar to Mark. “I thought you were one of my friends.” 

Mark frowns, taking his goggles off to set them on top of his head. “Donghyuck?”

The person freezes, taking his own goggles off and sure enough, it’s Donghyuck, long-term, self-appointed best friend that he fell off with the summer after sophomore year. 

“Mark? Oh shit,” he breathes. 

Mark offers him a hesitant smile. “Um, hey, how’s it been?”

“Pretty good, what about you?” He asks, voice strained as they try to push past the rock that’s fallen between them of complete awkwardness that can only come from not talking to someone for a year and a half after spending every waking moment with each other. 

“It’s been really nice this year,” he says. 

Donghyuck smirks, settling back in the lift. “Yeah, I heard.”

Mark groans, turning away from him while he starts laughing. “This is the first time we’re talking in almost two years and you decide to be an absolute menace?”

“I have to keep you on your toes, Markie,” he tells him, laughing harder when Mark pushes him a little, causing the lift to swing. “How has that been though? I definitely wasn’t expecting that.”

“I wasn’t either,” he agrees, a hint to his voice that has Donghyuck looking over at him in confusion and curiosity. Mark sighs, thinking this over and if it would be a good idea to tell Donghyuck about their predicament. Finally, he turns to him and sighs, meeting his eyes with full seriousness. “If I tell you this, you absolutely cannot tell anyone.”

“Mark,” he starts, an edge to his voice. 

“He didn’t do anything,” Mark says, looking up as they near the top of the mountain. “But it might take a lap or two to explain.”

Donghyuck frowns, but agrees anyway and they wait until they get past the top so Mark can explain everything. It takes him three laps to fully get everything out in the open, explaining his thoughts and feelings about it while Donghyuck listens, interjecting whenever he’s confused about something. The attendants get annoyed with them on their fourth lap, but Donghyuck tells them his friend is just a little scared of getting off, earning a slap from Mark. 

“Wow,” he says when Mark finishes. “I knew you were a little stupid, but I didn’t think you were that stupid.”

“Trust me, I know,” he says, leaning against the railing. 

“You guys sure do a good job at hiding that it’s fake,” Donghyuck notes. 

Mark frowns, looking over at him and sitting back up. “What do you mean?”

Donghyuck shrugs. “The way you too look at each other and act makes it seem like you’ve been pining after each other for years, not spontaneously kissing in the parking lot and deciding to deceive the whole school.” 

Mark looks past Donghyuck as he continues staring at him, trying to make sense of those words. 

“Maybe,” Donghyuck starts, getting his attention back on him. “Maybe you should take some time to yourself to see if you want to be in an actual relationship with Jaemin and see if he wants the same thing. If either of you don’t, maybe it’s best to end it now.”

“Maybe,” he hums, looking away. 

“Well, enough of that. Although I thoroughly enjoyed it, I came here to snowboard Mark,” he says, lifting the railing as they near the top. “And I’m pretty sure the attendants will kick us off if we stay on any longer.”

Mark laughs, but nods and follows him off of the lift. They spend the rest of the day together with Donghyuck’s other and technically new friends, Renjun and Yangyang, joining them. Mark doesn’t mind it though, not like he thought he would, and he rather likes the two seniors. He joins them for dinner, catching up with Donghyuck and meeting the other two, agreeing to join them the next morning. 

“I’m sorry we lost contact,” Mark says on their last morning, following Donghyuck to the lift. 

“Eh, it’s fine. We both grew away from each other and let petty things come between us, so it’s on me as much as it is on you,” he says with a shrug. “However, now that you’re friends with Jaemin, you should definitely get me in with his best friend.”

Mark laughs, looking over at the two who stand further in line. “Who? Jeno?”

“What a fine specimen of a man.”

Mark laughs harder, shaking his head. “I’m sure you could get in on your own. You’re social and charming enough.”

Donghyuck shrugs, looking at Jeno who’s laughing with Jaemin at something. “You’re right, I don’t need your help.”

“Ouch. I was going to help you.”

Donghyuck waves him off, waddling over to them and Mark sighs, shaking his head as he turns to Sunwoo. He pushes back the sick feeling he gets when he thinks about Jaemin, not wanting to ruin his last day at the resort, and instead takes a mental step away from his fake boyfriend. He asks Donghyuck if he can sit with him on the bus ride home while they load up, the other agreeing easily, and when Jaemin gets on the bus after putting up their bags, he looks around in confusion before his eyes land on Mark. 

“You didn’t want to sit back there with me?” He asks, voice not letting on any emotions that he perhaps wanted Mark to sit with him like he wanted it to. 

“Um, no,” he starts, looking over at Donghyuck who’s watching them carefully. “I kind of reconnected with Donghyuck, so we were hoping to catch up some more on the way home.”

Jaemin nods, sparing a look at Donghyuck before nodding again and leaning down to kiss Mark’s cheek. “Okay,” he says, lips lingering and when he pulls away, he offers them a smile before heading towards the back of the bus. 

Donghyuck shakes his head, eyes watching Jaemin. “You really have to figure that out, man.”

“Yeah, I know,” he sighs roughly, digging further in the seat. 

Donghyuck distracts him for most of the ride, talking and working over the things that had them drifting apart until that rock that fell between them is shattered from both sides and they can meet back in the middle. When they get back to the school, his mom gasps and pulls Donghyuck into a hug, exclaiming it’s about time the two of them made up and telling him to come over for dinner. Mark leaves them to go find Jaemin, but pauses when he sees him talking to his ex by the back of the bus, both of his and Mark’s bags in his hands. 

“I just don’t see why we can’t get back together,” his ex says, looking up at Jaemin with a frown. 

“Because I don’t want to get back with you,” Jaemin says, unintentionally tightening the barbed wires around Mark’s heart when he doesn’t say anything about dating him. “We’ve been broken up for five months already, it’s time for you to move on.”

“Yeah, because you surely have,” he gets out, hands clenching as he glares at Jaemin. 

Jaemin’s eyes harden. “I have, so you should too.”

Jaemin goes to step away, but his ex grabs his wrist, keeping him from going anywhere. “Wait, Jaemin, please. I miss you so much, I promise I’ll be better this time.”

Mark clenches his fist, taking a deep breath and walking from the side of the bus. “Jaemin?”

The two of them look over at him, the boy glaring at him while Jaemin removes himself from his grip to walk over to him. 

“Get home safe,” he tells him, sparing him one last look before walking over to Mark. 

“Everything good?” He asks, looking over at Jaemin’s ex to find him watching them. He takes the skis and snowboard from Jaemin along with their boots. 

“Everything is okay, trust me,” he says with a smile. Mark kind of wishes he’d tell him about it, but he doesn’t say anything and instead nods, following him to their cars. 

Jaemin smiles over at him, easy as always and making Mark feel warm, and he can only smile back despite taking a further step back to create a distance Jaemin is unaware of. 

Jaemin’s conversation with his ex mixed with Donghyuck’s pairs to not be the best combination. They leave Mark getting lost in his head too much, leaving him more quiet and closed off than normal, and every time Jaemin asks him if everything’s alright, he can only find it in himself to tell the other he’s just tired. Jaemin doesn’t seem to believe it, but there’s not much Mark can do about that until he’s finally figured out his own feelings on the matter. 

That matter being Jaemin and their fake relationship, because Mark’s come to realize he wants to date Jaemin for real, not under a situation where they’re both using each other to benefit themselves. Mark is done using Jaemin. Gabrielle has already backed off and Jaemin’s ex seems to have gotten the hint after their talk, so really, their relationship should be coming to an end, but Jaemin is still holding him and kissing his cheeks. He’s still cooing over Mark and walking him to classes, handing him coffee in the morning and confusing Mark to no end. There’s been plenty of times in this relationship where Mark has lost the original idea of why they did this in the first place, instead losing his grip on reality and drowning in Jaemin’s words and actions, in his smiles and lips, the laughter he lets out when it’s just the two of them in his car and how it feels to have him tucked into Mark’s neck. 

It’s easy to believe they’re actually dating and Jaemin is Mark’s real boyfriend because Jaemin makes it easy to forget they’re only faking this. 

But it’s that that always leaves Mark cold, like a shock of water was dumped over him, and leaves him shivering because they’re faking this, so really, how much is Jaemin still faking?

Is he faking his words, faking his sweet smiles and how well he gets along with Mark’s mom, or is that all genuine? Has Mark really been able to carve a place in Jaemin’s heart like he has to his, or is this really just for show for Jaemin? It’s that that leaves Mark confused, because as much as he sucks at getting his feelings across sometimes, he’s always been too empathetic and in tune with his emotions, to the point he ends up overflowing and spilling them everywhere, and there’s moments that Mark truly believes none of this is fake. That Jaemin isn’t faking this anymore and there’s a part that’s actually real, that Jaemin actually feels what he feels, but Jaemin hasn’t said anything and Mark doesn’t want to start assuming only to let his hope get crushed. 

“I don’t think we should continue on with this,” he says one Friday while they’re walking down his street, two weeks after the ski trip when he’s had enough time to think this all over. “With the fake dating, I mean.”

Jaemin is quiet but Mark doesn’t look up from where he’s watching their feet match each other’s pace. 

“What do you mean?”

Mark takes in a deep breath, looking up as they come up to his house. He walks up the steps to take a seat on the stairs and Jaemin follows, eyes looking over at him as he looks across the street. 

“I overheard the conversation you had with your ex by the bus when we got back to the school,” he says instead.

“I don’t have feelings for my ex.”

“I know.” Mark turns to look at Jaemin to find his eyes confused, no defenses held up, but just intense and confused. “I know you don’t, but I want to be with you for real.”

The hitch in Jaemin’s breath is audible, soft still like how Jaemin is, and Mark turns to look back at the street, hands fisting into his sweater. 

“I know you don’t have feelings for him anymore, but I want to be with you in an actual relationship and I can’t tell if you want the same thing,” he tells him. Jaemin doesn’t say anything and those barbed wires around his heart dig in more. “I don’t know what you want. I don’t know if you want to be with me in a real relationship or not, and I don’t know what’s been real for you this whole time or what’s been fake, because it was fake for me at first, but slowly everything I’ve said and did has become real and I’ve meant everything since then. I think you might want the same as me, there’re times when I just know that you aren’t faking anything, but then again, I don’t know because there’s so many other people you could be dating instead of the kid that lowkey sexually harassed you in the school parking lot. So I don’t know, but I know that I want to be with you for real, but I also need time to myself to get control of myself and you should take some time to think this over. Please.”

Jaemin’s eyes are unreadable when he turns to look at him. He’s just staring at Mark like he hadn’t had a total word vomit of everything that’s been building up and it makes him feel too seen, a little embarrassed at what he’s just done, something he’s never felt around the other. He quickly wipes at his eyes and turns back to look at the street. 

“Okay,” Jaemin says softly, making Mark press his fingers into his palms harder as his eyes start to burn again. “Okay, if that’s what you want, then take all the time you need.”

Mark curses in his head. It’d be easier if Jaemin fought against this because then he could get mad at the other and shift all these emotions onto something. He stands up and Jaemin follows, grabbing him by the wrist softly. Mark looks up at him as his eyes start to burn more and he goes to turn away to wipe them, but Jaemin stops him, hands cupping his face softly to wipe under his eyes. 

“Please don’t cry because of me, sweetheart,” he says softly. “Never because of me. I’m just a boy and we all know men aren’t shit.”

That breaks Mark, causing him to try to figure out whether to start sobbing uncontrollably or laugh because Jaemin always knows how to pull a laugh out of him. Jaemin smiles when he laughs a little, wiping under his eyes again and pulling him into a hug. 

“All the time you need,” he repeats, pressing his lips to the side of Mark’s head. 

Mark nods, peeling himself away from him and walking inside. He doesn’t look back at Jaemin, already feeling like he’s going to burst over the edge and he’d rather not do that until he can get to the confines of his room. 

It’s weird. 

Which of course it’ll be weird, but it’s especially weird going through his day without Jaemin there. It’s weird and Mark hates it, but he still forces himself to stay away despite wanting to just run to the other and throw himself back in their fake relationship because then he’ll still have a piece of Jaemin. He wants to go back to faking it because he misses Jaemin’s smile that can rival the sun and the long paragraphs he gets past midnight of Jaemin ranting about whatever it is that crosses his mind, really adding onto when Sunwoo called him a nerd. He wants to go back to faking it, but he forces himself to not look at the other and continue on with his day despite how horrible he feels. 

He doesn’t say anything when Sunwoo and Haknyeon ask about it other than, “don’t give him any shit about it, it wasn’t his fault.” And he gives a brief overview to Donghyuck while they’re in a drive through and the other buys him milkshake for him to cry into, rubbing his back and tsking about how he still hasn’t lost his drama. Mark throws a fry at him through his tears and snot, threatening to leave Donghyuck there. 

This goes on for three weeks and it’s the longest three weeks ever, but Mark feels put together by the end of it and feels like he can finally face Jaemin without breaking down about everything wrong and unfair with the world. He finally feels comfortable with himself and what has happened, deciding to give it another week before he goes to the other to talk and decide where they want to go from there. 

“I’m going to the soccer game today,” Donghyuck tells him when they get out of school. “Want to come?”

“I have to,” Mark tells him, digging his keys out of his bag. “Sunwoo and Haknyeon are making me cheer them on.”

Donghyuck hums, the two of them stopping at the next aisle. “Alright, well, I’ll see you there then.”

Mark nods, heading to his car. He feels weird about going because he feels fine about seeing Jaemin (he hasn’t been able to stop sneaking glances for the past two days and cheering when he doesn’t feel any negative emotions rise) but he also doesn’t know what’s going to happen. If Jaemin is going to come up to talk to him or if he’s going to leave him alone. The feeling only increases when Jaemin sends him a text, the first form of communication they’ve had this whole time other than the time Jaemin cleaned his group’s beakers in bio because he did that for everyone and Mark proceeded to have a breakdown in the bathroom for ten minutes. He looks down at the message that’s simply asking if he’s coming to the game, contemplating whether he wants to respond, but eventually telling Jaemin yes. 

He adds his last name and jersey number to the banner he made his friends, staring down at it for a good five minutes before nodding and leaving the house. He meets Donghyuck there, the other staring at his banner and shaking his head when Mark offers him a sheepish shrug, cheeks turning a bright pink. They find some seats with Renjun who’s near the bottom of the stands to see better, Donghyuck explaining how Yangyang is out on the field. Before the game starts and all of the team members walk out to the field, he looks down to find Jaemin already scanning the stands. Finally his eyes land on him and when they lock eyes, Mark gives him a small smile and thumbs up. Jaemin stares at him in shock before smiling and holding up a finger heart, making Mark laugh softly. 

Mark played soccer as a kid (it’s the whole reason Chenle even got into the sport no matter what he says), something he told Jaemin about and started laughing when the other proceeded to have a freak out about it. 

“It’s seriously not that special,” Mark told him, a smile on his face as he watched the other. 

“No, this really is. Oh my God, how perfect can you actually be?” Jaemin asked, causing him to blush fiercely. “A soccer player, aspiring nurse, complete cutie. What good deed did I do in my past life? Is this heaven? Are you an angel coming down to grant me a life of pure happiness and joy?”

“You’re too much, stop,” Mark told him, shoving his face away when he came up to hug him. “Yes, Jaem, I was an angel sent by God to make your life the best it could be.”

Jaemin smiled widely at that, circling his arms around him and tugging him closer, a cheeky smile on his face as he said, “I knew it.” 

It’s not hard for him to follow along at all or get immersed in the game, he and Donghyuck explaining what’s happening a moment to Renjun as Donghyuck did club with him as a kid as well. Jaemin scores one of their winning goals, making Mark proud of the other when the game comes to an end, their school winning at 3-2. He laughs as the team celebrates their win, hoisting their captain above them. Mark goes to get up to meet his friends in the parking lot, but he’s stopped by Renjun’s hand. He looks at him in confusion, turning to see what he and Donghyuck are staring at before his blood runs cold as he watches Jaemin climb onto one of the benches on the track. 

“Excuse me!” He yells, getting most people’s attention because really, what the fuck is he doing?

“What the hell?” Donghyuck questions. The stands are filled with soft whispers as people try to figure out what’s going on and Mark fiddles with the poster he made, watching Jaemin clap to get everyone’s attention. 

“Thank you!” He shouts, a charming smile coming to his face. He meets Mark’s eyes, rooting him into place, and then scans the crowd. “I have something to say! Confess, if you must.” 

He takes a deep breath, looking back at Jeno to find the other giving him a thumbs up. He nods, turning back to the crowd. 

“I have been in a fake relationship this whole time,” he says, earning several gasps from people. “Contrary to belief, Mark and I are not dating, nor have we ever dated. In fact, Mark was trying to get an admirer off his back and that led to him lying he was talking to someone. I went to check it out that afternoon and he actually kissed me as said admirer was coming up to us!”

Mark huffs, feeling embarrassment build up as people start looking over at him. He looks down, stepping closer to Donghyuck. The other curls an arm around him. 

“With that,” Jaemin continues, voice dropping in hesitance before picking back up. “We decided to fake date to get his admirer off of his back and to make it clear to my ex that I didn’t want anything to do with him anymore. Somewhere along the way, things started shifting.”

Mark looks up at this because this is it, isn’t it? This is the moment Jaemin is going to tell him whether or not he wants to actually date, and Mark kind of wants to throw a soccer ball at him for doing this so publicly and embarrassing him. He’s going to die if Jaemin says he doesn’t want to actually date and probably start crying if he’s honest. 

Jaemin looks over at him, eyes locked with his, and Mark can see the nervousness pouring from him. He keeps his eyes on him though, letting everything else fade away so Jaemin is talking to him and him only. 

“A while ago you asked if I would’ve asked you out under normal circumstances when you thought I was sleeping and honestly, I wouldn’t have,” he says, clenching his fist and those barbed wires around Mark’s heart. But then Jaemin smiles up at him, trying to force bravery and charm through the nervousness. “I wouldn’t have because I’ve had the hugest crush on you and I had no idea how to talk to you at all. Here’s this cute boy that’s wicked smart and a little sassy, and I had no clue how to even approach you for a normal conversation. I complained about it to Jeno all the time—yes, I know, and I’m sorry, but give me a break—and the next thing I know I’m being kissed by said boy for some elaborate way to get an admirer to go away.”

Mark feels his heart stutter, and then grow wings and fly away at those words. 

“So, Mark, I don’t think I would’ve asked you out under normal circumstances, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t enjoyed this. I want to date you for real, heck, I’ve stopped pretending after the first week. Every word, gift, action, everything was all real for me and I’m sorry I didn’t make that clear. I like you so much you don’t even know and there've been so many times that I’ve wanted to call this off because it hurt getting to see what it would be like if I had you fully to myself. It felt like a cruel game of having you dangled in front of me, but apparently I’m a masochist when it comes to you because I didn’t stop and continued on.” Jaemin takes in a deep breath, getting down from the bench to walk over to the stands and hop up on the railing in front of him. “So, in the grand spirit of things, Mark Lee, will you go out with me for real this time and be my boyfriend?”

Mark blinks, hearing people start cooing and talking to each other, but he can only focus on Jaemin and his nervous smile. Finally he starts laughing, tucking his face into his hands and wiping the beginning of tears away. He looks up at Jaemin, jumping down the bleachers to get closer to him. 

“Of course I will,” he says, stopping in front of Jaemin and smiling at him. Jaemin lets out a relieved sigh, leaning forward, and Mark cups his face, giggling a little. 

Jaemin smiles, taking a hand off the railing to cup his face and leans forward to kiss him. Mark meets him halfway, sighing into his lips at finally having him back and in his arms, falling easily into Jaemin’s lips like always, but this time it feels even better and more gratifying because this time, he knows he has Jaemin fully and truly. 

“I can’t believe you just embarrassed yourself in front of half the school,” he says in a voice for only them. “You idiot.”

“For you, it was worth it,” Jaemin tells him, eyes half-lidded as he opens them to look at Mark and make his heart pick up even more. “I’ll make a fool of myself all the time for you.”

Mark blushes again, leaning back into Jaemin’s lip to convey everything he feels that he can’t put into words. Jaemin seems to get it though, like he always does, because he always gets Mark and it feels amazing to not have to work overtime trying to get what he means across. 

Kissing Jaemin feels like a promise now, like their own promise of what the future will hold and Mark loves the way it feels.