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What are you afraid of?

Summary:

Asuka visits the mainland in the winter and finds herself overwhelmed by the crowds. She dips into a café to get away from it all, and finds herself daydreaming, asking herself an important question.

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Round and round, the silver spoon made its endless circuit of the vast ceramic cup, blending cream and milk and cocoa into a constantly shifting maelstrom of sweetness. At some point, Asuka mused on the absolute outer reaches of her conscious thought, there had been marshmallows on the top of this drink. A half-hearted glance down into the whirlpool showed no sign of them anymore, swallowed up and melted to become one with the chocolatey chaos. Her gaze turned back to the world outside the cafe window, to the blackness of the winter evening and the gradually thinning tide of pedestrians passing by.


Her eyes didn't settle on any of the random passers-by or the multitude of neon store fronts that dotted the cityscape. Truth be told, after the last few months back at the academy, on that island, the cities of the mainland had quickly become overwhelming to her senses. She looked to the window itself, to the translucent ghost of a reflection that she left in its surface. It sparked a memory in her. Deja Vu? No, it was somehow murkier, more abstract. The images of a dream pattering into her mind.


~


She had been sitting on a train, gazing out of another window, this time out on a series of rolling hills in the countryside as they sped by. It was summer, perhaps, or at the very least summer was on its way. She had been dressed in her uniform, one hand idly playing with the blue glove on the other.


"You seem tense." A quiet, rich voice had told her.


"No," Asuka answered. The woman she spoke to shifted in the seat next to her, but no motion reflected in the window. She remembered thinking that that just seemed fine. "I'm just thinking."


"You're afraid."


Asuka turned to her companion, crossing her arms over her chest as she did so. In the train seat next to her, an impossibly pale woman stared straight ahead to the front of the carriage, idly tucking a strand of ocean-green hair behind a long and pointed ear.


"And what exactly do I have to be afraid of?"


The woman turned to face her, slowly, ever so slowly. Dark red lips pulled back over vicious fangs in what could have been considered a smile. It was far too sad, though, far too... Empty.


"What indeed?"


~


"You know, in some cultures, people actually drink hot chocolate."


The voice, twinkling with impish delight, pulled Asuka back to the real world. She blinked, turning away from the window and looking up in confusion at the barista who had pulled up alongside her table, smiling down at her.


"Instead of just stirring it, I mean." The other girl motioned to the cup in front of Asuka. A quick look down showed a mess of rich brown stains running down the crockery, a large amount of the hot drink she had ordered now pooling in the small dish at its base. With a start she dropped the spoon, letting it clatter into the cup and adding yet more to the spillage.


"Ah, I'm sorry," she said, calming herself and quickly reaching for a bundle of paper towels at the far end of the table.


"Hey, hey, let me get that," the barista said, leaning over the table and pulling a white towel from her apron. She gently lifted the cup and saucer up and mopped up the mess that had made its way onto the beige plastic surface of the cafe table. Leaning back in her seat to stay out of the way, Asuka found herself watching the girls hands as she worked, at the blue stretch of a bandage on her thumb as she-


Asuka had begun to zone out again, only coming back as her cup was hoisted up and the barista turned away with it. Before she could protest, the cooled drink had been placed on a tray on the table behind and, in the same motion, a fresh cup was lifted and placed expertly in front of her. She looked down at it before turning her gaze up at the other woman, looking her properly in the face for the first time.


She looked to be the same age as Asuka, perhaps a student at one of the schools here on the mainland, working here part time. Her dark hair was tied back, revealing ears studded with a collection of piercings running from tip to lobe. Mostly, though, she found herself focusing in on the girl's eyes. A deep, dark brown, they glimmered in the festive lights that had been strung up across the cafe rafters - communicating a veritable galaxy of warmth and mischief in equal measure. It was heightened by the slight arching of her brow as she looked down to meet Asuka's own eyes.


"Oh!" Asuka twisted in her seat and reached for her bag, searching for her money to pay for the replacement drink.


"No no no," the barista held up her hand to halt her. "None of that. You've already paid, remember?"


"But-"


"Wouldn't be fair for you to pay for one of our signature hot chocolates and not get to enjoy it. Especially on a night this cold." She nodded past Asuka at the window. Outside the crowds had fallen to just a few couples walking arm in arm as they flitted between the stores. "That wouldn't be right at all."


"I- thank you." Asuka smiled, bowing her head slightly as she placed her hands around the cup, realising just how cold her fingers had become.


"Don't mention it," there was a flutter as the towel was sequestered inside an apron pocket once again and a quiet clattering as the tray was lifted. "Just do yourself a favour and drink that one. I assure you, it's good."


"I'm sure it is," Asuka said with the slightest hint of a laugh. "It smells amazing."


"Old family recipe."


"Wait, really?"


"No. But it is drummed into us all when we start working here. Gotta get it just right before they let us out there to serve customers. You'll probably have a place that does something similar wherever you're local to."


"What makes you think I'm not local to here?" Asuka asked with a little eyebrow raise of her own.


"Oh trust me, I'd remember seeing someone like you around here. Tokyo?"


"No," Asuka motioned in what she assumed was the vague direction of the coast, "the island."


"You're a Duel Academy student!?" The girl's mouth swung open.


"Yeah, but-"


Asuka was interrupted by the screeching of a chair as the Barista dropped down opposite her, elbows planted on the table.


"Tell me all about it."


~


The train had pulled into a tunnel some time ago, the green hills and fields replaced with rushing darkness. Bursts of light from lamps set along the way interrupted the gloom, momentary shadows stretching out across the train carriage.


"So you'll tell her?"


The smooth voice of her companion now came from the seat behind. Asuka didn't turn around.


"Tell who?" She asked.


"Asuka. She should know."


Asuka looked to the window once more. The darkness outside made her reflection all the clearer, eyes watering, hands clasped in front of herself tightly.


"She should know." She echoed.


"Then tell her." Her companion had moved forward in her seat, face pressed between Asuka's headrest and the neighbouring chair. Her breath, cool and scented like grave flowers tickled against the side of her neck and under the curve of her ear. "What have you got to be afraid of?"


Asuka said nothing. Her reflection, however, looked away from her and stared defiantly ahead.


"What indeed?" It said.


~


The conversation had stretched on and on, and the hot chocolate had gradually been drained as Asuka had relayed as many stories about life at the academy as she could think of. They had laughed so often and there had been countless questions, particularly regarding some of the more outlandish adventures that had been had on the island. Truth be told, Asuka wasn't entirely sure the other girl had fully believed half of them. But still she had listened enthralled. 


It was getting on for closing time by the time the conversation started to wind down and Asuka felt a little guilty that she hadn't ordered another drink in the meantime, no other customers had come in after all and she worried that she had monopolised the entirety of the girl's time. The music, previously a constant stream of forgotten 80's "hits" had been switched off and the barista had gone to cash up, leaving Asuka to collect her things together.


She had taken the cup away with her again, though this time there was thankfully far less mess. Asuka felt a familiar stab of nostalgia, a half-remembered vision of some romance comic she had seen years before. Some stereotypical scene where hands had brushed against one another and the protagonist had been rendered a blushing wreck by the encounter. No such hand brushing occurred, and Asuka was left to wonder whether she had been expecting, or wanting such contact, her eyes following the Barista to the counter.


Evening was over, it was officially night. The last boat back to the Academy, the overnight sleeper, would be leaving shortly and she knew she had to be on it. It had been a delightful evening, the conversation had really brightened her mood and made her feel centred, calming her from the chaos of the outside world.


And she could leave it here. As a nice, one-off chat and a very sweet, warm drink. The two hadn't even shared their names with one another. Asuka could leave and the two would be a flashing memory once in a while of a pleasant evening.


Asuka looked at her bag, and then to the Barista, whose lips pulled into a frown as she fumbled with counting out the till.


She could just leave, maybe say a quick goodbye as she did so.


Or...


She asked herself a question that had resounded in her head all evening. 


She answered it herself.


"What indeed?"