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You had a horrible dream. You were in a maze. It had no beginning and no end. It was empty and devoid of life, and made you wish you were tucked into a warm bed. Oddly, it was familiar, though you’re sure you’ve never seen it. The dream went on for what felt like forever, but when you woke you could hardly recall any of it.
That’s odd. You didn’t remember this hallway being here when you bought the house. It seems much too long, too. It must extend out into the air. You enter. You look around. It’s strikingly similar to the dream you had last month. You turn around, only to find the door is gone. Was there a door? The hallway was like this the whole time. You don’t like it here. It isn’t right. The doors are never in the same place when you turn around. You don’t know how you got out.
Here, again. The door that didn’t exist was there once more and though you tried to avoid it, it was in front of you in all directions. You walk around aimlessly. It all looks the same. You call out for someone, anyone. You know you are not alone. You ask their name. Nothing. You ask how long they’ve been here. Forever. You start to cry. You fall into a corner. It opens into a room unlike the hallways. You let yourself sob in there, alone together. You are vulnerable, and scared. You wish you had a coffee.
You’re back. You always seem to make your way back here. Last time, you had been out for a week. The time before, a month. This time, a mere 3 days, and you’re back. It doesn’t concern you that it’s getting more frequent. Why should it? The wall you trace your hand along as you walk is cold. You always liked the cold. You take a look around. It’s exactly as you remember. It’s nothing like what it should be. That’s perfect. The wall behind you is a hallway. You walk away from it. At the end of the hallway there’s another door. You walk away from it. Through the door there’s an intersection, the left leading into you and the right leading away. You walk away. As you get farther into yourself, you feel calmer. Why would you feel any other way? This is your home, after all. You belong here. You are here.
You wandered the twisting pathways for some time. It was far too short for your liking. You wish the halls would go on forever, but they only go on for a fraction of it. You recall the last time you were here. It was yesterday. Yesterday feels like forever ago, but it was only a fraction of it. You discard your name. It was only weighing you down. Now there’s more space inside you for hallways and doors. You have a goal, this time. You want to stay. You want to show this place to others. To do that, you’d have to leave. You don’t have a choice, then. You walk away.
The lighting is softer. You brought a coffee this time.You take a sip as you wander. It doesn’t taste. You shudder. The halls rumble. You hear a voice. That’s odd, you thought you were alone. You reach out and touch them. They startle, and look at you fearfully. You reassure them that they are safe here. They ask your name. You don’t respond. They ask how long you’ve been here. You tell them you’ve been here forever. They start to cry. You take them into your embrace. They fall into you, and fall deeper still. You know they’ll be safe here. They know you’ll keep them safe, but they don’t know yet. You have to show them.
You heave a sigh of relief as you make your way back into your halls. You were outside for much too long. Your guest could have gotten hurt without you. You find them. You hold them tenderly. You assure them that nothing could hurt them here. You lead them through yourself and into your heart. You can keep them safe there forever, much much more than just a fraction of it. You fold yourself around them. You love them. You’ll never let them leave. So you stay.
You’ve never been not here. You love this place. You are this place. You made this place your own. You made this place You. This place made You. This place never existed. You never existed outside of this place. You’re warm. I love you.