Chapter Text
The man on the bridge was definitely not fine. Alex usually didn't let himself get distracted when he ran, but something in him made him slow his pace when he saw the person throw his phone to the ground.
The man wasn't dressed for the morning cold in his shirt the colour of mustard. He looked exhausted, like he had been up all night.
Maybe he was coming back from a party, maybe he was just hungover, and that was it. Or maybe -and it was this thought that made Alex come to a stop- there was something seriously wrong with him. All Alex knew was that he needed to ask, or he would keep thinking about this stranger on the bridge for the rest of the day. The man started picking up the pieces if his phone, and Alex crouched down to help him. When he looked up, he was struck by the sadness in the stranger's eyes, eyes that looked at him, yet didn't seem to be sure of what they saw.
The man's messy hair hung over his forehead, his face was pink due to the cold, and formed a stark contrast with the London Eye in the distance.
“Are you okay?” Alex asked. It wasn't like him to care for strangers, but he needed to know.
“Me?” the man asked, as if he wasn't sure Alex was addressing him. “I'm fine,” his eyes moved everywhere as he said it. He was lying.
Again, Alex didn't know what compelled him to do it, but he took the cap off his drink and offered it to the man, who took it hesitantly.
“You don't know me but if you did you'd know I'm always fine,” he said, rambling. It seemed to be difficult for him to focus his eyes on one point. He was on drugs. Of course. That explained everything.
Before he could stop himself, Alex tenderly touched his face, startling himself. Why did he do that? He straightened, and turned his back on the man. Why did he touch this twitchy stranger? He didn't look back at the man, who was still crouching on the ground with the pieces of broke phone in his hand, and started running again. This time, it felt like he was running from himself. Why did he do this? It was not like him at all.
“What about your drink?” the man yelled.
Shit. “You can keep it!” he shouted hastily, and kept running. This is London, he told himself. You'll never see him again.
He wasn't sure if that was a relief or quite the opposite.
****
Focussing on his work was difficult. The stranger had gotten under his skin, and he wasn't sure why. Things like this didn't happen to him, they simply didn't. Meeting a stranger on a bridge, helping him pick up his stuff… it was such a cliché, wasn't it? Like something out of a bad movie. And yet, he saw the brown eyes look up at him for the rest of the day, friendly eyes that couldn't believe what they were seeing.
****
He was running again. The stranger had been on his mind for the past few days, even if he didn't like to admit that to himself. When Alex saw him get up from the stairs he was running towards, he thought he was daydreaming for a moment. He slowed down, and looked down at himself. He was drenched in sweat. Not his best look, probably.
The stranger ran to him with a warm smile. He was holding the empty container. “I wanted to say thank you. What I didn't get to say. Last time.” He made a vague gesture.
Alex didn't know what to say.
“I just had a hunch,” the man continued.
What did that mean?
He was rambling on, again. Apparently not all of that had been the drugs. “Obviously, I've got this wrong,” he said with a nervous laugh.
What did he want? Alex had never been this confused in his life. What had he gotten wrong?
The stranger placed the empty container on the ground, and walked away. He seemed annoyed for some reason, as if Alex wasn't catching up on something that he should…
He picked up the container, and looked at the man, to find that he was coming back. Why did that make Alex feel relieved?
That nervous laugh again. It was endearing, in a way. “My name is Danny.”
Alex knew what was expected of him, so the lie rolled off his tongue with ease: “My name is Joe.”
“Do you… want to walk with me for a bit?” Danny clasped his hands in front of his stomach and stood on his tiptoes, swinging back and forth a bit like he was anxiously waiting for the answer to a very important question.
Alex smiled. “Sure,” he said. He wanted to find out what it was about this 'Danny' that made him feel this way, whatever that feeling was.
They walked next to each other for a bit, and Danny asked him one question after the other, like he couldn't ever know enough about Alex, no, Joe. He was Joe now.
“Do you live in London?” “Yes.” “Oh, right. That was a stupid question. Do you run every day?” “If I can.” He looked happy about every answer he got, even though they were short.
Was that suspicious? Who had sent him? Alex shook himself out of that thought. Danny wasn't sent by anyone, he was simply a very curious bloke. “So Joe, are you…” Danny hesitated. “I've run out of questions.” That was a lie. Again.
Danny couldn't be a secret agent, his lying game was way too weak for that. Or it was an act. He had to stop thinking of potential friends as potential spies. This was why things never worked out, wasn't it? “Ask me. Please.” Obviously, there was something Danny desperately wanted to know, but didn't dare ask. Alex was curious to see what it could be.
“Are you out?” The question was asked so bluntly, and Danny looked at him with so much sincere curiosity and concern, that Alex was slightly taken aback by it. He stopped walking, with his hands in his pockets. “… No.” he said. A truth to compensate the lie about his name.
Danny smiled at him and nodded, as if he understood. But he didn't did he? A guy like him wouldn't understand. Danny had probably been out for ages, judging by how bluntly he was able to ask things like that. He probably was an open book, a man without secrets, who never had to worry about which lies he had told to whom, because he was always honest. He was a man who had nothing to protect. Nothing to lose. Well, for Alex, one simple truth or lie could be the difference between life and death. And Danny would never know that feeling, even if he pretended to understand this tiny part of it. “If you want to go, I can understand that reaction.” Alex said mechanically.
The answer surprised him. “I don't want to go.” This time, Danny wasn't lying.
Alex wasn't sure what to do now. What did people usually do in situations like this? Normal people? “Would you… like a drink?” he asked, cringing at himself.
But Danny just grinned like he had been hoping for the question and said “Yes,” and Alex could already feel that it would be the most important yes -for better or worse- he would ever get.
****
Eighth months later:
He didn't know why or how, but someone had guided him towards the keys to Alex' apartment. Danny's heart was racing the whole time, making his way to the building Alex lived. Were they over? He had told Alex about the most traumatic experience of his life, and then Alex had just disappeared. After eight months of dating, he would have expected a break up to be face to face. It wasn't like Alex to just drop off the radar, especially after something like that. It wasn't like him to break up with Danny by simply not returning his calls. Alex was amazing, even if Danny knew hardly anything about him. He didn't know many facts, but he did know that what he felt -what they felt- was real. He knew it with all his heart.
Maybe this was some kind of prank? Or would Alex be waiting there with a surprise?
A proposal?
He wasn't sure what to think of that, if that were true. To disappear for days was a no-no, even if it was to plan a ridiculously romantic proposal.
Unlocking the door felt strange. He had gotten used to the camera above the door, just like he had gotten used to the incredibly impersonal apartment. He had always figured they would move in together after a few years, and he would either turn Alex' place into a mess, or Alex would tidy up Danny's place, like he had done with Danny's life, in a way. He felt happier with Alex, content, at ease, calmer. That was the word, calmer.
“Alex?”
No answer. He went through every room, and was starting to panic. Where the hell was Alex? Who had given him the keys?
He heard a soft dripping sound, and thought it might be Alex coming out of the shower, but it was water leaking from the ceiling. Weird. Alex wouldn't let anything like that happen. He would have repairmen here within a day. So he hadn't been home in a long time then.
But the keys…? Something was not right here, and he dreaded finding out just how bad it would be.
Water. How could there be water coming from upstairs? There was an attic there, but Alex said it was full of junk of generations of previous tenants. He had never bothered cleaning it out, since he didn't need the extra space anyway.
Danny folded down the ladder, suddenly feeling like he was not supposed to be here. He had never been here without Alex, and even at times when Alex was just in the shower or in another room, he sometimes felt like an intruder. The house had that effect on him. He climbed the ladder, and the first thing he thought was “Alex has never lied to me before”. There was no junk. The room was spacious, with a bed -which was odd- and some furniture. Maybe that was the surprise? Maybe Alex was hiding here somewhere, to proudly announce they had a second bedroom now? Or that he could use this space as a sort of hobby-room?
He walked to the bed slowly, listening carefully if he heard Alex somewhere. A thought pushed into his brain: Alex did lie to you. The second time you met. His name isn't Joe. Yes, that had been pretty weird, but Alex simply was a very private person. Nothing wrong with that. Was there?
Danny frowned when he saw the music box. It was an odd thing to have, wasn't it? Not something Alex would own. He opened it.
Drugs. What the hell? None of this made sense. He closed it again.
The closet by the bed drew his attention. It was big, which meant that Alex had to have moved it upstairs in pieces, and assembled it here. But with what purpose? He opened it, and what he found was so absurd his mind went temporarily blank. SM-clothes. Why? He had never expressed an interest in that, and neither had Alex.
Was that why Alex said it was full of junk? Because he was embarrassed by what the previous tenant had left behind?
Danny opened a drawer full of sextoys. Yes, this was definitely something that Alex would rather keep silent about, than have to talk about with Danny. Or be seen with when he got rid of it.
That was the only explanation.
Danny looked around, and saw a suitcase in the corner. Something about it didn't fit the rest of the room, it looked older, less modern. He approached it, and was hit by an unpleasant smell coming from it. What was it? It smelled like something was rotting. Old clothes? Could they emanate such a smell?
He carefully opened one of the metal loops, and the smell got worse. Danny covered his nose with his sleeve. His panic got worse. Alex wasn't here. He hadn't been here for days. He hadn't returned Danny's calls. No one had ever been in this room. There was a suitcase in the corner with an unknown content… he knew what he was going to find, and a loud gasp escaped him. He had to know for sure. He opened the second loop, and opened the suitcase. He screamed and stumbled back when the dead eyes of the body became visible. Alex. It had to be A-
He was tackled to the ground, and before he had a chance to react, someone had pinned him down with both hands above his head, and was aiming a gun right in his face. For one long, terrible second, he knew he was going to die here. Just like Alex. He clenched his eyes shut, but could still see the dead eyes, he held his breath but could still not calm his heartbeat, and he tried not to think, but could only think of how this was the end. Then the person sitting on his stomach gasped, and said “Danny?!” with so much relief and disbelief that Danny was sure he had dreamt it. He opened his eyes.
Alex had let go of his hand within a second, and now clasped his hand over Danny's mouth. He shook his head. “Ssh. No time.” he whispered.
He got up and pulled Danny up as well. “They'll be here soon,” he whispered, at the exact moment the door downstairs got kicked down.