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Published:
2023-12-01
Updated:
2023-12-01
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328
Chapters:
2/?
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Episode Rewrites

Summary:

If you could go back in time, and change any short piece of dialogue in a ST:TOS episode, what would it be? I’m not talking about rewriting whole episodes, just making small changes to convey a different tone or meaning.

Imagine youself sitting in the writers room, and you say, "Hold on, how about we try this?"......

If you have any suggestions as to episode and scenes, let me know. Or if you want to draft one, post it in the comments and I will include it as a chapter with full attribution to the author.

Chapter 1: Tomorrow is Yesterday

Chapter Text

Tomorrow is Yesterday S01E21, 19:17

Spock: I find that we must return Captain Christopher to earth after all.

Christopher: Why? You said I made no relative contribution.

Spock: Poor choice of words on my part. I neglected in my initial run through to correlate the possible contributions by offspring. I find, after running a cross check on that factor, that your son, daughter, Colonel Sean Jeffrey  Sarah Jane Christopher, headed, or will head, the first successful Earth-Saturn probe which is a rather significant -

Christopher: Wait a minute, I don’t have a son daughter.

McCoy: You mean yet.

Spock: The doctor is correct. Unless we return Captain Christopher to Earth, there will be no Colonel Sean Jeffrey Sarah Jane Christopher to go to Saturn.

Kirk: Well, that’s it, isn’t it. We’ll have to find some way of …

Christopher: (chuckles) A boy girl. I’m going to have a son daughter.

Chapter 2: Turnabout Intruder

Summary:

No prizes for guessing what I would change in this one - it would have bbeen so easy to make it better!

Chapter Text

Turnabout Intruder S03E24 01:19

 

Lester: I hoped I wouldn’t see you again.

Kirk: I don’t blame you.

Lester: The year we were together at Starfleet was the only time in my life I was alive.

Kirk: I never stopped you from going on with your space work.

Lester: Your world of starship captains doesn’t admit women people who failed the Robbiani Dermal-Optic Test*. It isn’t fair.

 

05:20

Kirk: ... Now you know the indignity of being a woman failing to become Captain. For you this agony will soon pass as it has for me. Quiet. Quiet! Believe me, its better to be dead that to live alone in the body of a woman have failed to achieve your destiny.

 

36:19

Lester (Kirk): But her intense hatred of her own womanhood anger over her inability to become a Starship captain made life with her impossible

 

49.12

Kirk:Her life could have been as rich as any womans person if only….

 

(note – the Robbiani Dermal-Optic test is mentioned at 26.30. In Kirk’s body, Lester passes the test).