Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

There was a rebel that lived somewhere deep inside Nancy Wheeler.  A wild beast of a woman unfit for the suffocated life that feels more like a punishment than a privilage.  She’d known this from an early age, wearing pants she’d stolen from her male friends under her skirt simply because she’d get in trouble for it and cutting her hair much shorter than her mother would have allowed, knowing good and well that she would inevitably get screamed at for it.  The older she got, the more reserved and tame this rebel became, preferring to lie in wait for the perfect opportunity to pounce rather than be an impulsive hurricane that would have made her parents hate her.

But this rebel was growing tired of her cage.  Her back and arms ached to spread her wings and fly from this small little village that was almost entirely managed by her family.  Though she seemingly had it all, there must have been just enough missing from her life for the vibrancy of her passion for life to dull to a much more muted color than she’d once lived in.

Things were more dull than ever when her parents told her the arrangements they’d made for her to marry.

She should have seen it coming, really.  As king and queen, the Harrington’s had much more important matters to attend to than those of a landlord, so they passed said responsibilities down to Ted Wheeler.  With their parents working so closely, Nancy and Prince Steve had become fast childhood friends.  And though they had certainly once had innocent school children crushes on each other, enough time had passed that they simply had a good laugh about it.

Nancy loved Steve with her whole heart.  But in the same way she did Mike, as a brother.  And the thought of him bedding her made her want to vomit.  No offense, Steve .

How lucky she was that he was just as equally opposed to the idea as she was.  More than that Nancy was pretty sure he had his eyes on the village’s priest’s daughter Christina, and had had such a sneaking suspicion ever since Steve started nicknaming her Chrissy out of the blue.

And so while they were supposed to be spending quality time as betrotheds rather than friends, Steve snuck off somewhere with Chrissy, while Nancy got to wander about the village without supervision.  The conniption her mother would have if she were to hear word about it made Nancy giddy with risk.  It was her new favorite way to get her blood pumping.

Trying to find clothes more along the lines of what the villagers wore had been difficult at first, but after a trip or two to the local seamstress and with help from Steve, she had managed to have a small secret wardrobe in the back of her closet that wouldn’t give away just how out of her element was.  She tried not to stare at the people in town, not wanting to come off as rude as they would expect her to be if they were to know who he was.  But really, it was fascination.  

She was hypnotized with how different the daily excitement of their lives were from her own. The strip of road that the market was mostly contained to was a chaotic hustle and bustle unlike anything she ever really got to experience before.  People shouting about product and prices while the smell of tobacco, burning firewood, and the for-sale livestock made the country air thick in her lungs.

It was a little grimey and gross.  And she loved it.

There’s a saloon close to the market that she’s never been to, but it catches her attention when she hears music and a much louder roar of chatter than usual coming from the open doors and windows.  A quick peek inside one of the windows reveals that the place is packed and, sure enough, there’s a few musicians at the back of the room.  She can’t help but wonder if there’s a local holiday she doesn’t know about going on or if they like to celebrate for no reason.  If there is, it would be too easy to let on to the fact that she isn’t exactly a local. She’s drawn to it anyway, slipping inside when she sees a man get up from his barstool and head for the door.

Nancy hurls herself into the spot before it can be grabbed by someone else.  The volume of both the music and the crowd is much more than she’s been exposed to and it’s disorienting for a moment as she struggles to get used to it.  She gets her wits about her enough to notice the barkeep coming over, and though she doesn’t hear what he asks her it’s easy to assume and she proves to be correct when she asks for a simple pint and he heads off to get it for her.

It’s overwhelming but it's good .  She can feel the music and liveliness of the crowd in her chest, rattling her heart around in her ribcage and making the instincts deep inside her clench her stomach in anticipation of whatever could cause such a loud and terrible noise.  But she wears a small smile through it all because she can’t recall ever feeling so much .  She’s blinded by the vibrancy of her surroundings in contrast to her dull life in the castle grounds up on the hill.  This is what life is all about, she thinks.  Music and friends and family and the time spent together, not money and undesired weddings.

The barkeep returns to her and slides her glass in front of her, and though she sees his lips moving she hasn’t a clue what he says.  “Sorry, what?” she yells over the crowd.  Though he repeats himself she still can’t hear.  Nancy shakes her head, a bashful smile taking over her face as if it’s her fault.  “Sorry, it’s really loud!”

He grins back at her and puts his hands on the bartop so he can hoist himself up just enough so that he can lean over and into her ear.  His hair tickles her face and the smell of spicy firewood coming off him manages to filter through the smell of beer.  “I said did you need anything else?” he asks, still having to speak up a little bit, even though their faces are only inches apart.

Nancy turns her head to look at him but quickly leans back when her nose brushes against his cheek.  His eyes are the dark chocolate kind of brown and impossibly large, like that of a baby cattle.  There’s a childlike cheekiness in the way he smiles at her.

“Oh.  Oh, no.  Thank you,” she says quickly while her face starts to feel the warmth of bashfulness.

The man smirks a little and shouts over the noise once more.  “There’s some tables out back if it’s too loud in here.  Normally I wouldn’t suggest such a thing to a woman, since the usual crowd back there is more often than not unsavory.  But they’re all in here right now, so it’s probably all clear.”

She wants to insist that she’s fine, that she’s just like everyone else and enjoys the noise.  But her ears aren’t used to it all and she’s scared she’ll come out deaf.  Not to mention now would not be a convenient time nor place to have a fit of panic.  So, Nancy gives the man a nod, takes her glass in both hands, and manages to weave her way through the crowd of drunk and smelly bodies and out the back door.

Fresh air hits her in a pleasant gust that has the unease that had started to ferment in her stomach wiped away.  Sure enough, there’s a few tables and chairs against the back of the pub.  And while it’s clear the area isn’t often attended to, discarded glasses and garbage every which way as well as tobacco ash, what really catches her attention is the view.  Though there’s trees a few hundred yards or so away she can see so clearly through them the lake at the bottom of the hill their village is on that must be very close.  The trip from the castle to the water takes about half a day.  But it’s worth it.  Some of her most beloved childhood memories lay at the shore of that lake.

Her and Mike teaching Holly how to swim.  Steve making her a stronger swimmer and helping her swim far enough away from the shore to send her mother into a tizzy.  Giggling with her friends on the precipice of puberty at the boys that were there working on the fishing boats.  Sand between toes and sunburns and laughing so hard her stomach hurts.

“Oh good.  You found it.”

Nancy tears her eyes from the reflection of the sun off the water through the trees and finds the man from behind the bar coming through the back door.  He’s carrying a barrel and she quickly realizes what it’s for when he starts collecting some of the litter from the table closest to him.

“I know they don’t take care of themselves back here.  So I thought I’d…” he waves his hand in a circle, “make it nice for you.”

“Oh.  Well, thank you,” she says, taking a sip from her drink and managing to keep herself from grimacing at the taste until he isn’t looking.  “Is there an occasion for the music?” she’s nervous to ask, nervous at how obvious the answer should be.

But he only smiles a little and shrugs his shoulders.  “Just something we do at the end of the month.  It would probably be good business to do it more often, but I think I’d just about keel over if it looked like this every night.”

“Well that definitely wouldn’t be good for business,” Nancy says with a small laugh.

He laughs louder than her.  “No, I don’t think so,” he agrees.  As he finishes cleaning up one table he heads to another, closer to Nancy.  “Are you from around here?”

“Uh…” she momentarily weighs her options, mind working overtime while she watches him waiting expectantly for her answer.  “Not too far.  But I’m visiting some family in town for a while.”

He nods a few times, dumping out a few half finished beers into the grass before putting them in the barrel.  “Is it everything you ever dreamed it’d be?” he asks, heavy sarcasm dripping from his tongue.

“Yes,” she answers, immediate and sincere.  It’s been overwhelming but she feels alive.  Normalcy and motonany is a delicacy for her and she’s already wondering when she can get her next helping.  “I’m really enjoying myself so far, actually.”

“Oh.  Well, good,” he replies.  Though he sounds surprised he doesn’t seem to think oddly of her answer.  “How long are you going to be in town for?”

“I’m not sure.  Probably a little while.”

“Well then you should try to stop by on a night that this place isn’t beyond capacity,” he tells her with another short, sarcastic laugh.  “It’s definitely not normally like this.  You can actually have a conversation most nights.  Plus, I heard one of the owners doesn’t like to take pretty girls’ money.”

Nancy stares at him for a moment, a smile of disbelief slowly creeping onto her face.  It’s crass and more forward than any man has ever been with her, and though it makes her blush it also makes her laugh.  “Oh really ?  Well then I suppose I’ll have to hope I’m the kind of girl he normally fancies.”

“No need for that, you definitely are,” he says.  He’s confident as he does, and he grins like he’s telling some kind of joke.

They gaze at each other for a moment, and almost as if sending her some kind of telepathic message her jaw drops a little.  “Wait, are you…?”

“My name’s not on the paperwork, but for all purposes; yes,” he tells her.  “My uncle owns it, but he handles all of the finances and records and boring shit I have no patience for, so more often than not I’m the one in charge of the bar.  So there’s no one I have to answer to if I want to give out a free drink every once in a while.  Not really.”

Despite the drop in temperature now that she’s not huddled up in a room full of bodies and instead exposed to the fresh air her face feels impossibly warm, and she can only hope and pray it doesn’t show in her complexion.  “You don’t have to waste that on me.”

“Wouldn’t be a waste,” he insists, leaning on the table he’s currently standing in front of.  Which is next to the one she’s sat at.  “And you wouldn’t owe me, you know… any other kind of payment afterwards either.  So don’t worry about that.  It’s just something I do sometimes, that’s all.”

She wants to protest, insist that there’s probably other and more local girls more worthy of his attention.  But he comes over and sits in the chair beside her, turning towards her enough that his knee touches hers.  The only men her age she’s ever really around are Steve and Mike.  She’s not used to it.  And she’s not used to the way it makes her heart start to drum a steady beat in her chest.  Every atom in her body feels alive.

“What's your name?”

“Nancy,” she answers.

There’s not a flicker of recognition in his face as he reaches out a hand for her to shake.  It’s textured with callouses and much larger than hers, but warm and gentle despite its rough feel.  “Eddie.”

She doesn’t know, or doesn’t remember, how Steve met Chrissy.  They could never speak much about it since more often than not they were on castle grounds, where there were eyes everywhere.  But she suddenly has a million questions.  Had it been so scary, worrying about every little piece of information about himself that he offered?  Had she been as forward about her first impression of him as Eddie is being?  And had he felt absolutely misty eyed about it all?

“So, visiting family?” he asks slowly, sucking on his teeth a little while he settles into his chair a little more.  “Might this be to make some… arrangements?”

Is she there to find a betrothed and be married off?

“No.  No just visiting for the sake of visiting,” she answers, and her cheeks grow even warmer when he’s visibly pleased with the answer.

She’s entirely out of her element here.  And oh does she love it.

“And, uh… are there arrangements already made?” Eddie asks while he spins a ring that rests on his pointer finger.  One of many that he wears.  They made his fingers look long and nimble, and add an elegance in contrast to the dirt and callouses.  “Will I have another man busting down the door because I gave you a free drink?”

“No,” she says with a laugh.  Sure, arrangements are made.  But they’re arrangements both she and Steve are trying to work their way around.  And if Steve were to find out about such an offer from a man the only thing he’d worry about is if he can get a free drink of his own.  “No door kicking or punches thrown in your future.”

Eddie’s smile doubles in size.  “Well, I couldn’t be more pleased to hear it.”  As he shifts how he sits in the creaky chair his knee presses into hers more and she swears she feels a spark of electricity run up her thigh.  “How long do you think I’ll have to wait for you to take me up on my offer?”

Nancy laughs again.  She doesn't usually laugh so much unless she’s with Steve or her siblings.  “So eager to see me before I’ve even left?”

“If I were, would you think of me as a fool?” he asks.  There’s nothing doubtful or insecure in his delivery of the question.  As if there’s nothing to be insecure about at all.

Which there isn’t.  Not really.  If anyone should be insecure it’s Nancy.  “No, I wouldn’t.  And I’d say that I’d like for it to not be long of a wait.  But that really depends on how easy my family makes it for me to sneak away.”

“You’d have to sneak out to come see me?”

Before she can think of a response, or before he can tease her about it like he seems to intend to by the look on his face, the door he’d come out of flies open and slams against the wall beside it.  In its place stands a bald man with a grey beard that’s chopped close to the skin, and he glares at Eddie with an incredulous look.  “Boy, get your ass back in there before they start pouring their own drinks.”

“Yes sir,” he says as he stands up once more, and though there’s a definite sarcasm in it it sounds harmless.  Which the man, most likely his aforementioned uncle, seems to know since he only rolls his eyes before disappearing inside.  Eddie looks down at her, smile remaining.  He really does have a lovely smile.  “Well, hopefully I’ll see you soon, Nancy.”

“Hopefully you will.”

She feels more drunk as she sits in the silence of his exit, playing the interaction in her head about a hundred times than she does when she finishes the beer she never ends up paying for.

The walk from the village back to the castle grounds is a few miles, and since it’s almost entirely uphill it takes twice as long as it would take to walk the same distance flat.  But the time goes by relatively quickly.  Steve is good and effortless company.  Which she’s often grateful for.  Especially when her head is lost in the clouds and she’s having a hard time following the story he’s telling her.

“We don’t normally spend any time at her house at all- which is connected to the church, I can’t recall if I’ve told you that or not- but her father wasn’t due home for hours.  There’s a very unwealthy family that lives a bit out of town that’s been dealing with supernatural occurrences, so he was supposed to be there attempting to banish whatever it is that’s been bothering him.  It was supposed to take all day, so we thought it would be safe for me to be there, but just as-”

“How did you meet Chrissy?” she blurts out, interrupting him.

Steve falters, words sputtering to an end, eyebrows coming together a little bit while Nancy can see the gears in his head turning.  His lips turn down into a frown, but the kind of frown he wears when he’s thinking really hard.  “I asked her for directions.  She happened to already be heading where I was going, so we walked there together.  She’s really easy to talk to, so we talked the whole way.  We ended up spending most of the day together.  And I just had this feeling that… I don’t know, that I had to see her again.”

Nancy’s stomach rolls over a little at the parts of the quick story that ring with too much familiarity.  It feels all too similar to the dance in her belly while talking to the barkeep that, though he’d long left her eyesight, had stayed stubbornly put in her brain.  “Does she know who you are?”

“Yes, I told her last time I saw her,” he says with a small sigh.  “It occurred to me that some other man could try and take my place any second, and that the more I hid from her the less likely she is to want to turn anyone else down.

“How did she handle the news?”

“How would you take it?” he asks.  Which is answer enough.  “What’s got you so curious?”

She shrugs, making sure to keep her eyes focused on the uphill trail.  She’ll never be able to get away with lying to Steve if she looks him in the eye.  “No reason, really.  I got to talking to someone in town today and mentioned you and her.  Without disclosing certain details, obviously.  But they asked how you met, and I felt like a bad friend for not knowing the answer.”

“You could never be a bad friend.  Not when you’re the best one I’ve ever had,” Steve says with a small laugh, shaking his head at her.  “Now tell me; who’s so curious about the love life of a friend of yours?”

“Oh, no one.  Not really,” she says, as her voice does that little upward pitch she can never seem to get control of when she’s lying to Steve.  As well as Mike and Holly.  Nancy curses herself in her head and clears her throat a little.  “It’s nothing.”

"Yeah, sure sounds like nothing," Steve says with a small laugh.  It only takes another moment or so before Steve stops walking and turns to face her, leaving her not much choice but to do the same.  "Come out with it."

Nancy lets out a scoff as she fiddles with the knot around her waist keeping up her skirt that's a little too long on her, especially for such an uphill trip.  "I don't know what you're talking about.

Steve laughs again before putting on a poor impression of her, dramatically batting his eyes and clasping his hands together.  "I don't know what you're talking about."

"You ass."  Nancy goes to smack his arm and he quickly jumps out of her way.  "Keep it up and I won't be telling you a single thing."

"Ah, so there's something to tell!"

"You're impossible," she mutters as she starts back on their path.  A small sigh of defeat falls from her lips when Steve quickly catches up with her.  It's only a matter of time before he bests her in her ability to keep secrets.  Especially when a small, tiny, part of her does actually want to talk about it.  "It really is nothing.  I talked to the local barkeep for a few minutes, is all.  He showed me a more private place to sit since there was a lot going on inside."

"You let some drunken old man get you alone?" Steve demands, temper flaring.  "Please don't tell me he was unsavory with you."

"No, stop it!  He wasn't, I swear.  And he wasn't old and revolting, either.  He couldn't have been more than a few years older than yourself.  And he was very nice."

"Oh."  A few beats of silence pass, the dry grass crunching beneath their feet.  "Oh.  I understand now."

"What's there to understand?"

"You wanted to know if you felt like how I did when I met Chrissy today with him."  Though she keeps her gaze fixed forward she sees him look down at her with a smile that seems almost proud.  It makes her face feel hot, and not from the beating springtime sun.  "Did you?"

"... perhaps," she confesses slowly.  "He asked if I was betrothed, I said no.  He said that should I come back he won't charge me for my drinks."

"He sounds very forward."

"He was," Nancy agrees with a laugh.  She can't help the small grin that spreads on her face and it's all she can do to bite her bottom lip in hopes that it won't grow.  "I liked it."

Chapter Text

Three days was much too long a wait.  Nancy wonders how Steve goes so long between trips into town, and therefore getting to see Chrissy, without getting antsy.  She supposes he has no choice, since he would be much easier to spot and subject to much more going wrong.  But still.  Nancy had been counting down until her next opportunity to go into town.  She might have had to wait much longer too, had the king and her father not had business to attend to a days trip away.  The moment their carriage was out of sight Steve and Nancy were stumbling into their commoners clothes and running down the hill, bidding each other temporary farewell as they went their separate ways as they entered the town.

The bar was far less crowded than it had been during her previous visit, and she wonders if this is how it usually looks.  Tables and chairs are filled, yes.  But there’s plenty of room to walk around, and it isn’t difficult to find a spot for her to sit.  Even if it isn’t behind the bar, where she would have liked.

She doesn’t recognize the boy behind the bar.  He’s younger than Eddie, perhaps even younger than her.  But he seems to keep up with the work just fine.  His hands work to clean glasses and pour drinks at lightning speed and though his curly hair, much curlier than hers or Eddie’s, is stuck to his forehead with sweat he doesn’t seem stressed or bothered in the slightest.

He comes around eventually and asks her what she wants to drink, and she spits out the name of something she’s heard her dad request before without much confidence.  Safe to say he isn’t much of a drinker.  The boy's eyes narrow just a little while a smile tugs at his lips.  “Are you Nancy?”

“Excuse me?”

“I asked if your name was Nancy,” he repeats, grin quickly growing.

For a moment she panics, thinking that he’s recognized her and is about to bombard her with questions about the inner workings of the kingdom that she wouldn’t even know the answers to anyway.  But a moment or so passes and those questions don’t come, and the cheekiness in his expression remains, and there’s really only one other way he’d know her name.  The thought has her face feeling warm and her stomach doing backflips.  “Yes.  It is.”

“Good to know,” he says, satisfaction taking over the slight smugness in his expression.  “I’ll be back with your drink.”

Eddie told him about her.  It’s all that she’s able to think of, even when she tries not to.  Eddie was talking about her.  There’s no way he was speaking of her the same way she was of him, she isn’t foolish enough to think so.  But thinking about her name on his tongue when she wasn’t around has her feeling like a giddy young girl yet again.

Even if he isn’t working, even if she doesn’t get to see him, she’ll walk away with something.

Her head is lost in the clouds a little and she has no idea how much time has passed before a drink slides in front of her, waking her from her trance-like train of thought, and someone sits in the chair across from her.  It isn’t just Eddie’s presence that makes her melt a little bit, it’s how glad he looks to see her.  His hair is tied up this time so that all that hangs down is his bangs, and Nancy thinks to herself that she likes this.  Feeling like she can see him better.

“I thought you’d make me wait longer,” Eddie says as he settles into the seat, folding his arms on top of the table.  He’s wearing the same rings as before and this time his sleeves are pushed up enough to reveal a few tattoos on his arms.  Her brain malfunctions at the sight a little bit.  “Missed me that much?”

Nancy has to shake her head a little bit to collect her thoughts once more.  “I had an unexpected, really good, opportunity to slip out.  I couldn’t pass it up.”

Eddie’s eyebrows raise up and disappear under his bangs.  “You had to wait to sneak out to come?  They must keep you on a tight leash.”

She laughs, short and loud.  “One of royal proportions.”

“So you must have been greatly eager to see me,” he says.  It’s not a question.  He says it like he knows it’s as true as it is.  Whether it’s because he’s some secret mind reader or because she has no poker face is the only mystery.

There’s no point in denying it, as it seems.  Eddie’s already got her figured out, he just wants her to say it.  So it might just be best to get it over with.  “I was greatly eager to get my free drink,” she says as she reaches for the glad he’d put in front of her for the first time, pulling it towards her.  It’s just about as strong as the one she previously ordered and it burns going down, still yet to help her understand why some people lose their lives to something that tastes so bad.

Eddie takes the reply in stride with a laugh, folding his hands on the table and letting them settle evenly between them.  She tries not to study them.  “I guess I’ll take what I can get, then.  Just as long as you’re a tiny bit excited to see me.”

“I might be,” she says, and though she tries to be coy about it the truth leaks through in the way the words come out.  When she watches satisfaction take over his face she casts her gaze down into her glass.  “I don’t think I have to ask if you are.”

“Nope.  I’d go as far to say that this is the highlight of my day.”

“Why?”  It comes out more blunt and unpleasant than she had meant it, and so she quickly shakes her head a little as her words stumble to get out.  “Not that I’m offended by it.  I assure you that’s far from the case.  I’m just curious, is all.  Why you might be more excited to see me than the other girls you give free beers to?”

“Oh, uh…” Eddie taps his knuckle against the table a few times before holding his hands open upward.  “You’re the only one right now.  Which isn’t to say I’ve never done it before.  But it’s been a while.”

She blinks at him a few times, momentarily wondering if he’s joking.  Waiting for his cheeky smile to break out and for him to be honest with her.  But it seems he’s being honest from the start by how he can’t quite meet her eye, his gaze fixed on his finger as he traces the natural pattern of the wooden table top.  “I’m flattered, Eddie,” she says, curling her hands around the sweating glass in front of her to keep her from reaching out to him.  “Even more flattered than I was before.”

Eddie looks back up at her and she doesn’t have to wait long before his smile returns.  Her stomach does a backflip at the sight.  “Really?”

“Yes, really.”

They look at each other for a moment, and though she can’t tell if they’re both waiting for the other person to make the first move or simply enjoying each other's company she’s content either way.  Plus it gives her an opportunity to admire him without ogling at him.

She likes his eyes.  They remind her of that of the newborn animals on the small farm they keep every season; wide as saucers with a vast warm brown and entirely gentle.  She likes his hair, wild and unattended to, but not in a way that comes off sloppy or unclean.  Rather it looks effortless, and she finds herself wanting to reach out and take a curl between two fingers to see if they’re soft to the touch or if he feels as rough as he looks.

“Have you gotten to make your way around town much yet?” he asks.

Nancy shakes her head.  “No, not yet.”  Of course she hadn’t; she had to be careful.  While she wasn’t the most recognizable person on the castle’s property she would get in more trouble than she could bargain for if someone were to recognize her and if word were to get back to her parents.  “Hopefully I will soon.”

“What about right now?” Eddie asks, and his kind and demure smile turns into one of mischief.

“Don’t you have to work?”

“Nope.  I’m not working today, I just have nothing better to do than to hang out in the back and bother my uncle and Dustin,” he tells her with a small shrug.  “But I’d much rather be doing something else with someone prettier.”

He’s so shameless in his compliments.  Which wasn’t to say that he should be, simply that she couldn’t be so upfront about such a thing so confidently.  “Are you sure?”

Instead of answering Eddie stands up and comes over to her side of the table, holding out his hand for her to take.  “You can bring your drink with you if you’d like.  Just don’t tell anyone, we can’t afford to replace stolen glasses.”

She opens her mouth to tell him he has nothing to worry about since she has no one to tell, but words fail her for a moment when her hand lands in his and he takes hold of it quickly.  In the books she adores, the narrator describes their first touch with a lover as that of a spark, but she now thinks this is too harsh of a description for a feeling so soothing.  No, as his much larger hand wraps around hers it feels like the warmth of the sun spreads from her fingers up her arms and has her feeling like she’s melting.  It’s not unlike the feeling of a cat waking up from a nap in the sun or the time she, Steve, and Mike had gotten hold of some of the king's liquor and drank laying in the yard and staring at the sky.

Liquid bliss.

Nancy tries to recover quickly, picking her glass up and looking up at him.  If he noticed the malfunction of her brain he doesn’t make it obvious.  “Well don’t I feel lucky.”

Eddie takes her through the market, which she’s been in before but much prefers walking through on his arm.  He tells her the best and worst product at each stand, the names of half the people they pass by and anecdotes he had about them all stocked up like the king’s armory.  She holds onto his arm the whole time that they walk, mainly because if they were to get separated she’d be totally lost and without a clue as to how to find him once more, but maybe also a little bit because she just likes being close to him.

He seems to be popular with the townspeople since countless of them come up to greet him.  But when he’s then introduced her to too many for her liking she suggests going somewhere more private.  Even if it leads him to think he’ll be getting lucky it seems worth it.  Not that she wants him to find out what she’s keeping from him, but if he does she’d like to be in control of it.

He’s unphased by the suggestion, insisting first that she pick out a few pieces of fruit from a stand before leading her onto the side streets and then out into the grassy field behind the village.  Before she can ask where they’re headed she finds them in a spot where the trees are perfectly parted to reveal a view of the water from up on the hill.  They’re close enough to the shore that she can see the glittering reflection of the sun across the caps of waves, the fisherman that occupy the small dock, and the mountains on the other side of the water.  The view is spectacular and it seems he’s well aware since instead of taking them any further he sits in the grass.

“Do you live close to the water?” Eddie asks as she settles in beside him.  “Back where you’re from?”

“Close enough to make it there in a little less than half a day.  But not nearly close enough for my liking.  I’m envious of how close you are to it.”

Eddie shrugs a little, stretching his legs out in front of him and leaning back on his hands.  He looks all too content, and knowing how easy it would be for her to feel the same is far too tempting so she tucks her legs underneath herself and keeps her hands busy with inspecting the apple she’d chosen.  “I don’t get to see it as much as you probably think.  The thing about living in a great location is if you’re poor enough you never really get to enjoy it.”

Nancy frowns a little, looking over at him.  “Is that so?”

“Don’t go and worry about me, that’s not how I meant it.  We’re fine as we are right now,” he quickly insists.  “But it seems like every time prophet margins start to get more than enough for us to keep our head above water the king sends his henchmen to reign down on us.”

“How do you mean?”

“That moron who oversees the kingdom’s property.  He raises our rent like the decision is synced with the cycle of the moon,” Eddie tells her, his brows coming together.  He’s annoyed, clearly, and Nancy’s heart begins to sink.  “Perhaps I’m just being paranoid, but… sometimes I think he has it out for us.”

“You think he’s trying to bankrupt you?” Nancy manages to ask even though her throat is so dry.  She quickly takes a large bite out of the apple in a half hearted attempt at hydration lest she have to speak again.

Eddie shakes his head, just a little.  “Maybe.  Maybe not.  Either way he’s a selfish, money hungry buffoon.”

The landlord is so much more than that.  He’s a cold man with a personality so weak it could be shattered by a strong gust of wind.  Despite the fact that he has three offspring he’s far from a father.  And despite the fact that he married at the first chance he could, he's far from a husband.  His selfishness stems from absent mindedness; he doesn’t have the wherewithal to play any kind of calculated long game to put a simple bar out of business.  It’s more likely that he forgets how often he raises the rent and thinks it’s still a reasonable price.

“So I’ve heard,” is all she says.

He raises an eyebrow at her.  “Really?  You’ve already gotten filled in on the town gossip?”

Nancy opens her mouth, closes it when she realizes her mistake, and opens it again.  “Just from my family.  They didn’t say much, nothing like that.  But I wouldn’t doubt such a thing about someone in such a position.  Still, though, why might he have it out for you?”

“Well maybe it’s just our sunny disposition,” Eddie says sarcastically.  “Or maybe it’s because of my father.  He used to raise quite a bit of hell.  Or so I’ve been told, I never really remember it.  He would yell in the streets at anyone who would listen to him about the unfairness of the king and his men.  He’s long dead, but grudges can be immortal.”

Nancy frowns again, this time in a way much more laced with sympathy.  “I’m sorry about your father.”

“‘S alright.”

“Do you have much family left?”

“Nope, not really,” Edddie answers.  “My mother is dead too.  Before he was.  And I don’t have any siblings.  I live with my uncle who never married.”  He looks away from the view of the water for the first time since they sat down and over at her.  “Family can also be something you make yourself, though.”

“So tell me about that family.”

Eddie smiles once more, and though it’d only been a couple of minutes she had missed the sight of it.  “The boy at the bar; Dustin.  His mother is a widow, so he’s been working as long as he could to help her out.  Lucas, his closest friend.  Gareth, and his family that’s friends with my uncle and introduced us.  And the preacher's daughter, Chrissy.  Who I’ll be going to see later once you’re sick of me.”

“Did you have plans?” Nancy asks quickly.  “I don’t want to take up your time with your friend.”

“No, no.  You’re not, Nancy,” Eddie tells her, laughing a little at her worry.  “I was going to surprise her.  Gareth saw her with a man he’s never seen before, and apparently they seemed quite taken with each other.  She hasn’t said a word about who this man is, and I’m not a very patient man when it comes to gossip about my friends.”

If it didn’t hit so close to home Nancy would have laughed.  She can imagine what he thinks of it all; a wealthy man from out of town had taken a liking to her.  If only he knew it was not any wealthy man but Prince Steve.

“I hope you’ll report back.”

Eddie’s face lights up a little as he turns his body a little more towards her.  “I take it that means you’re planning on seeing me again?”

Her face is set ablaze with bashful warmth and she quickly looks down at the apple to prevent his gaze, but it’s rendered useless when he gently and slowly takes it from her hands so he can take a bite, right on top of the spot there she had.  Nancy bites down on her bottom lip and rubs her thumb over a dry cuticle.  He’s got her right where he wants her, and she doesn’t see a way out.  “I suppose I am,” she admits.  “Are you glad?”

“You have no idea.”

“You’re very forward,” she says, because she can’t think of anything to say on the same topic that won’t further embarrass her further, and she’s had just about enough of that.  “ Much more than most.”

He looks over at her and seems almost worried.  “Is that a bad thing?”

“No, I wouldn’t say it is,” she tells him quickly.  “It’s just not something I’m used to.  Other than a few people who know me extremely well.  I’m not used to it coming from someone who ‘’ve just met.”

“Have I offended you?”

“No!  No.”  Nancy shakes her head and turns herself towards him a little more.  “What I’m trying to say is I like it.  It’s just not something I know what to do with.  No one speaks to me like this.”

Eddie leans his head on his shoulder, leaning back enough that he has to look up at her.  “How’s that?”

“I’m always my fathers daughter.  Most of the people I interact with on a daily basis are his affiliates.  Besides them it’s just my family and my very best friend.   But it’s all under his shadow.  No one sees me as just a woman.  Just me.”

His wide brown eyes scan her thoroughly, and she feels small under his gaze.  But entranced all the same.  She could sit there staring at each other for the rest of the day.  “There’s nothing just about being a woman,” he finally says.  “And there’s nothing just about being you.”

Nancy could kiss him right then.  Hell, she could marry him.  It had taken years for her to get Steve and Mike to understand what it meant to be a woman, and how it was different from what it was thought to be.  She had limited reading material to point them towards- only two books once she and Steve had started making trips down to the village, and before then nothing.  They didn't understand perfectly, no man could, but they’ve turned into men she isn’t embarrassed by, which is more she can say about most of the others.

And Eddie isn’t patronizing about it; as if he should be thanked simply for respecting her.  He says it like he’s describing the weather to her.

She opens her mouth, but it’s rendered useless when words don’t come to her and the only sound she lets out is a breathy laugh.  She wishes she could crawl into any tree or shrub and curl up into a ball, only to reemerge after she’s collected herself.  But she settles for laying on her back in the grass and looking up at the drifting clouds.

She only has a moment or so before Eddie settles beside her, laying close enough to feel his presence brushing against her arm but not quite touching her.  Keeping her eyes fixed on the clouds Nancy waits for what’s next.  For him to try and make an advance on her and for her to be faced with whether or not she wants to indulge him while she’s betrothed.  She’s certain Steve’s made some kind of advance on Chrissy, and she wouldn’t have been hurt or offended if she had reciprocated.  Their engagement was a joke, and both of them were dreading the punchline.  

Still, would Nancy let him?  Was it really fair to Eddie to let him pursue someone he couldn’t have?  Was this all just her being selfish?

But Eddie doesn’t put her in such a position.  Rather than taking advantage of the fact that they’re entirely alone, Eddie asks her about her life.  About her family and friends, of which she doesn’t have much.  How she likes to spend her time, how else she’d like to spend it if she had the world at her fingertips.  He asks her about the books she likes to read and the music she likes to hear.

She tells him as much as she can while still saying so little.  It’s an unexpected kind of torture; having to hide so much of herself from someone who seems to see her for exactly what she is.  Eddie sees the headstrong and opinionated woman that normally only lives in the reflection of a mirror.  And he wants to see more of her.

Which he makes blatantly clear as they stand near the bar, readying to bid each other goodbye.

“So do you think I’ll actually get to see you again?” he asks, looking down at their feet while the toe of his boot rearranges the gravel they stand on.  “Or am I about to get my hopes up for nothing?”

“I promise you’ll see me,” Nancy assures him, taking hold of his hand and giving it a light squeeze for good measure.  “I can’t promise when, but I’ll try to not make you wait very long.”

Eddie looks down at their intertwined hands, then back up at her.  “You sure it’s worth all that trouble?  Sneaking out just to see me.”
She shakes her head.  “It’s not any trouble.  But yes, it would be worth it.”

His impossibly large eyes light up like the night sky.  Like she’s just given him the highest of compliments.  He’s looking down at her lips and shifting his weight restlessly.  He wants to kiss her, she knows he does, and she’s incredibly glad that he doesn’t.  “Are you sure you don’t need me to see you home?” he asks instead.  “I don’t want you to get lost.”

“I won’t.  I’ve got a superb sense of direction.  I’ll be fine, Eddie.”

“Alright.”

She doesn’t want to go, and she’s certain he doesn't want her to either.  But the hike back up to the castle is long and exhausting and she’ll need all her energy to pretend she isn’t a little lovesick once she’s around her family once again.  Plus it’s already dark, which means it will start getting cold before she makes it back up and inside.

She’s glad he doesn’t try to keep her any longer since she seemingly had no choice but to bend to his will.  Instead he puts his hand on the back of her head and pulls her close, until her forehead is pressed against his chin.  He just holds her there for a minute or so, and it feels like one of the most intimate things anyone has ever done to her.  Her eyes fall shut while she breathes in the scent of him and relishes in the sound of his breathing before he eventually lets her go and they part ways.

Normally, Nancy wouldn’t do much other than rest her feet after hiking back home from the village. She marches right past her house and up to the castle.  It’s after dark so she knows she’ll either find Steve in his bedchambers, in the barn feeding the horses midnight snacks, or atop one of the towers looking at the stars.  Though the latter was less likely the earlier into the night it was as it was a habit born out of insomnia.

While it would be slightly faster to get to his bedroom Nancy sets out for the barn first, thinking that a little extra mud on her “disguise” couldn’t hurt.  Her legs feel wobbly the closer she gets, already tired feet unsteady in the muddy ground, but she pushes herself ahead when she sees a light coming from the barn.  Sure enough Steve is combing out one of the horse's manes (his parents like to have them done up in some kind of braid, which Steve despises since he doesn’t imagine it would be very comfortable for them).

“They know each other,” she blurts out the second she’s close enough to him, panting slightly from the walk and probably looking a little bit crazy by the way Steve almost flinches.  “Eddie and Chrissy.  They know each other.”

Steve’s brows come together in confusion, but his lips turn up into a cheeky smile.  “You went to see him today?”

“Not the point.  He and Chrissy are friends.  She’s been talking about you.”

She doesn’t have to worry about being interrogated by Eddie any longer when Steve lights up like the stars above their heads at this news.  “He said that?”

“Well, not you exactly.  He doesn’t know who you are.  Someone they know saw you with her, and apparently she’s been very tight lipped about it.”  Nancy laughs a little bit when Steve all but has hearts for eyes.  “He’s probably talking to her now, trying to get information about the mystery man.”

“What do you think she’s saying?” Steve asked, almost panicked.  As if he should have anything to be worried about.

Nancy rolls her eyes at him a little bit.  “Oh, I don’t know.  Probably something about how handsome and kind and funny you are.  Maybe that she wants to run away and get married.”

She expects them to have a good laugh about it but Steve’s anxious expression falls a little as his gaze flickers momentarily over to the horse beside him.  There’s still a sense of nervousness, but it’s shifted somehow.  “Do you think she’d really want that?”

She hesitates a little before she leans forward against the half door both Steve and the horse are sat behind.  “You’d know the answer to that better than I would, wouldn’t you?”  When Steve simply shrugs as a reply she cocks her head to the side a little.  “Steve?”

“I’ve thought about it before,” he confesses quietly, fingers continuing to run through the horses’ mane.  “Asking her to run away with me.  We’re both unhappy with the way things are.  Why not change them.”

“Steve, you can’t just leave.  You’re-”

“I know what I am just as well as you know I don’t want to be it,” he says before she can finish.  Not unknindly.  No, he sounds exhausted more than anything.  “I don’t have many choices Nancy.  If I live this life laid out for me I’ll be miserable.  And you will be, too.  I really do love you, just not in the way that’s meant for marriage.”

It’s not that she thought he’d never daydream of such a thing.  Hell, she did all the time.  Especially since meeting Eddie.  But these were daydreams; fuel to get through the day when the role they’ve been born into is too much to bear.  She’d never put any stock into these fantasies, and maybe she’d been ignorant in thinking he didn’t either.  But it’s clear now that he’s at least a little serious.  Serious enough to worry if this is a plan Chrissy would be okay with.

“You’re really thinking about this,” she says.  It’s not a question, rather her letting the idea settle.

Steve looks over at her a little sadly.  “I didn’t mean to keep it from you.  I’m just not ready to face how realistic it may or may not be.”

“That’s alright.  I can’t say I haven’t thought of it.  I just never thought it possible to try and attempt to think up some kind of plan.”  She folds her arms on top of the door and rests her chin atop.  “You aren’t allowed to leave until I’ve properly met Chrissy.  I’ll have your father send out every last man to come and look for you.”

He laughs, and it’s a good sound to hear while she’s so close to drowning in ‘what if’s.’  “I won’t,” he promises.  “You know, hypothetically, you could come.  If you wanted.  You’re the main thing I’d miss, after all.”

“I should hope so.”

“Eddie could come,” Steve adds.  “Especially if the two of them are already friends.”

It’s all a bit too much, all a bit too real for what she’s used to.  And she thinks Steve knows it when he changes the topic fairly quickly to what kind of mischief the two of them can get up to for the remainder of the night.  Still, the thoughts persist at the forefront of her mind.  All the way until she’s laying in bed staring at the ceiling and listening to cicadas.

Eddie’s still not much more than a stranger, when she really thinks about it.  The thought of not only leaving her life as she’s always known it behind, but doing so with people she barely knows, is a little terrifying.

On the other hand there’s something extremely romantic about it.  And thinking about her and Steve sneaking off into the night with their forbidden lovers and running through the fields to start their new lives makes something inside her stir.  Something that makes her feel more wide awake than ever.  It makes her want to dance under the moonlight and run barefoot in the fields and breathe in the nights’ air until her lungs can’t take it anymore.

It lasts through the night and into the morning, and as she’s lacing up the back of her dress she longs for much more muted clothes and a small little cottage hidden from the prying eyes of the castle.

Chapter Text

When she walks into the bar she, once again, sees only Dustin working.  She doesn’t feel quite as shy as she did previously as she walks right up to him and asks “is Eddie working today?”

“Nope, he’s off today,” Dustin answers.  But before Nancy can step back and thank him for the help Dustin adds “but they live upstairs, so you can probably find him there.”

“Oh,” she says, admittedly a little surprised.  “Are you sure-”

“Yes, I’m sure,” Dustin tells her with a cheeky grin.  “Go ahead and find him.”

He points her to a small hallway just around the corner from behind the bar, with a rickety staircase at the end of the small length.  They creak under her weight as she makes her way up slowly, hand tightly gripping the railing beside her.  At the top of the stairs it opens up into a loft, a small kitchen on the right and sitting room on the left.  There’s two doors, one open and one closed, so she pokes her head in the open one and strikes gold.

She finds Eddie sitting on the floor of what must be his bedroom.  His hair is tied up and his tongue pokes out of the corner of his mouth while he’s piecing together what looks like the early stages of a guitar.  To both her horror and delight he’s not wearing a shirt, and since he doesn’t sense her appearance, she has a moment to admire the tattoo on his chest and the side of his abdomen.  Admiring only his tattoos, of course.  Nothing else.

Before she can start drooling on the hardwood floor Nancy reaches over and knocks on the open door.  She can’t help but laugh as he nearly jumps out of his skin, pieces of the guitar falling into his lap while his eyes go wide and a hand flies up to his chest.

“Surprise,” she says, holding her hands out.  “Dustin said it was okay to come up and find you.”

“Yeah, yeah, it’s very okay!” Eddie assures her.  He gingerly picks up the guitar pieces and sets them down on his bed he’s sitting in front of before standing up.  The shocked look of surprise he wore is quickly taken over by an ear to ear grin.  “You’re just so quiet, I didn’t hear you coming.”

“Good thing for you I wasn’t some kind of murderer.  A sneak attack would have been too easy.”

As he heads to his dresser and throws on a white linen shirt she stands at the end of his bed and peers down at the guitar.  Up close there’s no denying that’s what it is.  It’s just the skeleton, two pieces that need to be turned to one, one of them with the neck and marked frets.  “Keeping yourself busy?”

“I had one already.  But Dustin wanted to learn so I gave it to him.  And I thought it would be more fun to make a new one rather than just buying one.”

“Is it?”

Eddie laughs as he comes to stand next to her, close enough to brush against her side as he repositions the pieces a little.  “I don’t know if I’d still call it fun , but it’s definitely keeping me busy, alright.”  He turns his attention back to her, looking at her like she’s something a million times more valuable than any instrument.  “To what do I owe the privilege of your company?”

“I was in the neighborhood,” she answers, and she doesn’t even try to make the lie convincing.  Not when she knows how Eddie’s face will light up- which it does.  It’s adorable how predictable his admiration is.  “I wanted to see you.  Unless you’re too busy.”

He scoffs a little and waves towards the half finished instrument.  “Just with this.”

“Well then be my guest.”

A small crease settles between his brows.  “What?”

“Keep working on it,” she tells him.  “I don’t mind just watching and talking.”

After only a moment or so of curious hesitation Eddie agrees and they settle on his bed sitting opposite one another.  Other than Mike and Steve she’s never been in a mans bedroom before.  Considering their engagement the only reason Nancy is still allowed in Steve’s bedchambers is because she’s been going in there alone with him for the better part of twenty years.

This is entirely different, but Eddie seems unbothered, so she tries her best to look the same.  She can’t recall the last time she felt so… private.  When she’d had quite literally no eyes on her while talking to another.  It really is just the two of them.  They’re not surrounded by bystanders that, while they aren’t paying the pair any mind, outnumber them greatly.  No one would know anything they said or did unless they were to speak of it.

She couldn’t remember feeling so exhilarated in a long time.

“Once it’s done I’d love to hear you play it sometime.”

Eddie looks up for a moment, and his eyes shine like the sun.  “Really?”

“Yes!  I don’t get to hear any nearly as much as I’d like to.”  She hesitates just a moment or two before continuing.  “And I’d like to hear what kind of music you like.”

Though his smile remains, Eddie shakes his head a little.  “I don’t think you’d like it.”

“Why not?”

He shrugs his shoulders.  “It just doesn’t seem like the sort of thing you’d enjoy.”

“You don’t know me very well.”

She means it as a lighthearted joke but the words hang heavy in the air in between them.  It’s far too true, and the extent of it makes her heart sink a little.  She can’t recall feeling so seen by someone outside of Steve and her siblings, perhaps ever.  Eddie feels like someone she’s known forever.  She doubts there’s much she could say to him that he would judge her for.

Apart from the obvious.

Though Eddie definitely gives some thought to her slip of the tongue his expression doesn’t betray what any of those thoughts may be.  “You’re right,” he concedes after a moment, fingers gently tapping against the wood while his gaze remains locked on her with such focus she cen’t help but squirm a little.  “But I’d like to.”

“Eddie-”

“I don’t mind that you’re secretive,” he continues, but she’s only partially convinced this is a true statement.  “But your secrets have a safe place with me.  When you leave this village to go back to wherever you're from, which I sincerely hope doesn’t happen any time soon, I don’t want to only have a million wonders and what ifs to remember you by.”

He’s so sincere she could cry.  Suddenly she’s thinking too hard about Steve’s daydreams about running from their lives in the shadows of the castle, off to be the best possible version of themselves.  She’s thinking too hard about the four of them living in a cottage somewhere with a garden and livestock, living self sufficient so they only have to see and talk to other people when they want to.  About waking up with the sun in her eyes on a warm spring day in Eddie’s arms, and having nothing more important to do than simply lay there and wait for him to wake up.

She sits up from where she’d been leaning against the wall, and he matches her movement by inching close enough for their knees to touch.  Nancy looks down at her hands in her lap, glad he’s still holding the guitar since it’ll hopefully keep her from reaching out for him.  “You’d be upset with me.”

“I doubt that,” he says with a small snicker.  “Did you kill someone?”

Now it’s Nancy’s turn to laugh.  “Of course not.”

“Are you some other kind of criminal?”

She shakes her head, forcing herself to look up at him so the smile he wears can ease some of the crushing weight of the truth she’s withholding from him.  “No, I’m nothing of the sort.”

“Well then I can’t imagine it would be so bad,” he says.  But of course he can’t since she’d lied to him nearly the moment they met.  Now she imagines she could have saved herself a lot of trouble if she were to answer one of his initial questions truthfully that yes, she was engaged, but that it was more complicated than he could know.  “Tell me, Nancy.  Try and scare me off, since you’re so convinced you will.”

Her bottom lip starts to tremble a little bit.  She knows the jig is up; that the time to tell him is now or never.  But the thought of him casting her away for the truth and losing his friendship is a very real and terrifying possibility.  The time she spends with Eddie has become something almost meditative.  It allows her to reset from all the pressure and bullshit of her stupid posh life and the expectations and responsibilities that come with it.

Before she can get the courage to speak, which isn’t to say it happened very fast at all since he had been patient with her much longer than she expected him to, Eddie leans in and kisses her.  It’s one of the most blissful sensations she’s ever experienced but she can’t enjoy it.  Not when she jumps back like he’s burned her and shouts “I’m engaged!”

Nancy dares to open her eyes and the confused heartbreak on his beautiful face is palpable.  “What?”  The word comes out as a weak whisper, like that of a wounded puppy.

“I’m engaged,” she says again, and it feels like spitting out blades.  Tears start to spring in the corner of her eyes and she only makes a half hearted attempt at holding them back.  “To Prince Steven.”

Eddie blinks a few times, slow and dumbfounded, before he shakes his head a little.  “You’re engaged… to Prince Steven Harrington.  So what the hell are you doing here with me?”

“He’s my best friend in the whole world.  But I don’t love him.  Not in the way a wife would,” she insists, pleading heartbreak dripping from her tongue the way tears start to drip from her eyes.  “It was both our fathers ideas.  Of course neither of us were given a say.  Our fathers are selfish bastards who want us to be in the ame beneficial but loveless type of marriage they’re both in.  You’re friend Chrissy; he’s the man someone saw her with.”

Eddie squeezes his eyes shut tight while he continues to shake his head.  “Wait, wait.  Chrissy is being courted by Prince Steven? ”

“He wants to run away with her.  He told me so only a few days ago.  He’d rather have her than the crown.”

“Holy shit,” he breathes out.  When Eddie opens his eyes he looks at her as if for the first time, but it lacks the disgust she had feared.  “Who are you?”

“Theodore Wheeler’s daughter.”

Eddie gapes at her for a moment before he rubs his face with his hands, elbows propped up in his lap.  The silence in the room is deafening.  Nancy doubts she’s breathing since she can hear Eddie’s so clearly.  She’s trembling, hands squeezed tight together while she watches Eddies every movement with wide eyes.

“Jesus Christ,” he mutters after a minute or so, sliding his hands down his face until they’re only covering his chin.  “If that’s all true… why are you here?”

Nancy sniffles a little bit while her brows come together.  “What?”

“You’re engaged to Prince fucking Steven, super rich, if you live near the castle that’s miles away from here.  Why do you want anything to do with me?”

“Because I like you!” she says with a weak sounding laugh.  “What other reason would there be?  I want to see you and spend time with you, even if my parents would go blue in the face for yelling at me for it.”

Eddie’s lips tug upward in a ghost of the smile she’s already gotten so used to seeing.  “Really?”

Every time they’ve met Nancy has made a point to not reach for him, unable to trust herself with what she might do upon making contact.  Even now, with all her skeletons pulled out of the closet from him to see, she has to push herself off some kind of mental ledge before she can wrap her hands around his and pull them down to settle between their laps.  Electricity sparks and sizzles against the palms of her hands and makes her feel restless for something she probably shouldn’t have.  Especially when Eddie looks at her with the same sort of admiration she’s grown so used to seeing from him.

“Yes,” she tells him as earnestly as she can.  “I really and truly like you, Eddie.”

Eddie squeezes her hands a little, turning them over so he can run his thumb across one of her palms.  It’s such a gentle and miniscule touch but it sends a shiver down her spine.  “I really and truly like you too, Nancy Wheeler.”  Her full name is something she never anticipated him knowing, let alone hearing it in his voice, and it has her absolutely swooning.  And she wonders how obvious this is by how his smile changes a little bit.  “You really don’t love him?”

“Only as a best friend.”

“So…” Eddie looks down at their hands and back up to her face a few times.  “Can I kiss you?”

She could turn over and scream into his pillow like some kind of giddy young girl.  If they were anyone else, anywhere where there’s even a microscopic chance that someone could see them and/or know who she is, the answer would be a disappointed no.  But they’re in total privacy, the closest people to them drunk and below the floor under their feet.  So when she breathes out a giddy “yes”, it’s the best word she’s ever tasted on her tongue.

While Eddie doesn’t waste a moment leaning in and kissing her he’s gentle with it.  She can’t decide if it’s obvious enough that she’s never been kissed before or if he simply wants to be delicate with her, but he handles her with care worthy of a highly breakable object.  And while normally comparing herself to an object in any kind of way on someone else's behalf would make her sick to her stomach, and perhaps a little impulsive with her anger, in this connotation she’s more than happy to accept it.

One of his hands leaves hers to cradle her face and she practically melts into his touch.  His hands are calloused with years of hard work and she loves the feeling of it in contrast with the soft skin of her cheek.  His lips, on the other hand, are just as soft as hers and taste vaguely of cigarettes.

Tentatively she moves her hands to rest on his shoulders and, when she finds the courage, slides them up to meet on the back of his neck.  Any worries she might have about whether or not she’s doing all this right dissipate when she can feel him smiling a little against her lips before his free hand lands on her waist and pulls her close.  She can feel in the movement how strong he is even with how gente he’s clearly being with her.

Something deep in her stomach starts to stir, and it’s not just the rebel.  Though she’s there, too.  Sticking her nose through the gaps in the bars of her cage and sniffing out a situation she’s not supposed to be in; her favorite kind.  But no, there’s something else by her side.  Nancy thinks that for the first time she’s experiencing something she’s read about a million and one times; lust.  And it’s no longer a mystery as to why it’s one of the seven deadly sins.  She knows that in that moment she would do any number of immoral and awful things if Eddie only asked her nicely and continued to kiss her in such a way.

Eddie’s hands start to wander, though not dangerously so.  They travel up and down her sides, calloused fingertips finding the fleshy parts of her waist and holding on carefully but tightly.  All while, as if he’s trying to forbid her from being able to think straight, he slides his tongue into her mouth and starts to dance with hers.  It’s a striking realization she has then that if she were to offer herself to him fully she wouldn’t be running much more of a risk than she already was.  Would it make her a whore?  Most would say yes.  But this would serve to offend Steve more than anyone and, as far as she knows, he’s already done the same.  And unless one of his parents or their servants were to conduct some kind of physical examination on her no one would know.

The rebel jumps for joy inside her cage that doesn’t feel quite as small as it usually does at the thought.  A thought that, once Nancy thinks it, she can’t stop thinking it.  What Eddie’s hands would feel like on her bare skin, along with his lips.  What he would look like undressed, and what he’d think of her in the same state.  She doubts she and Steve will consecrate their eventual marriage so this might be the only chance she’ll ever have at having sex, and even if it isn’t it’ll be the only time with a man she loves.  Because if she doesn’t love Eddie now, it really is only a matter of time.

She isn’t sure who initiates the movement but suddenly Nancy’s sitting on his lap and pulling the tie out of his hair so she can run her fingers through it like she’s imagined countless times.  It feels a bit like her own before she cut most of it off- to her mothers horror- which just feels right for some reason.  When Eddie’s lips start to travel down her neck her head falls back limp to give him as much access.

“You’ll have to tell me when to stop,” he mumbles against her throat, breath hot and sending a shiver down her back.

He’d be okay if she wanted to stop.  She doubts he’d be the kind of man she’d have to worry about giving her a hard time about it.  And yet it doesn’t make her any more inclined to tell him to slow down.  More than that, the fact that she’s willing to let her call the shots only makes her want him more.  Which is really saying something, since she’s never wanted anyone the way she wants Eddie right then.  An all consuming ache somewhere inside her that only he can relieve.

“I don’t want to,” she breathes out.

Eddie gives a small hum of confusion before he separates from her, the spot in her neck his face had been pressed against feeling cold and tingly in his absence.  “What?”

“I don’t want you to stop,” she tells him.  She doesn’t recognize the sound of her own voice, thick and shaky with lust.

“Nancy-”

“Don’t try to talk me out of it,” she says before he can get very far.  “I barely have control of anything in my life.  My body is almost all I have.  So don’t try to stop me from using it how I want, with who I want.  Because I don’t know how many chances for that I’ll have again.  I want this, and I want it with you.  If you don’t then that’s a different story.  But don’t tell me what I want because you think you don’t deserve to be it.”

Eddie looks at her with wide puppy dog eyes, scanning her face rapidly.  His hands remain on her waist, holding her securely in place on his lap as if he’s afraid of her toppling over and onto the ground.  She can practically hear the gears in his head turning, the part of his brain she’s come to hate desperately trying to piece together some reason as to why she might be lying.  He nibbles on his lower lip a little while his internal battle rages.

“You’re-”

“I’m sure, Eddie.”  She clearly anticipated his reply correctly when he promptly closes his lips.  “ Please .  This suffocating life might kill me one day.  This is what I want until then.  You are what I want.”

He only looks at her for another moment or so longer before he kisses her again.  It’s apparent quickly that her words have penetrated since there’s a confident hunger that wasn’t previously there in the way he kisses her.  His hands wander to places no one has ever touched and send fireworks off on her every nerve ending.  She’s never felt so alive.  This isn’t crisp air after a light rainfall or running down the hill with Steve to go see their favorite commoners.  This- being touched and needed and loved by someone- is what it means to be alive.

How will she ever go back?

Eddie’s hold on her is strong and secure while he repositions them, laying her on her back while he settles over her.  His bed isn’t as soft as hers, but it’s warm from the bright afternoon sun and smells like him so it couldn’t be more perfect.

His shirt is the first article of clothing to go.  Then both her outermost layers followed by the ones underneath.  Eddie mumbles about how absurd it is how many layers women have to wear and she laughs and tells him she has to wear even more when she’s at home, to which he looks at her like she has two heads.  She likes this; she likes being able to point out how different their lives are.  Especially when it serves only to give them a good laugh about it.

He’s the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen.  His hair is frizzy and unruly in the same way that he is, and it tickles her skin when he leans down to kiss her lips and her body.  His torso is chiseled from years of hard work with tattoos littered up his arms and across his chest.  She wonders who gave them to him, if they hurt, how he decided on the designs.  She wants to know everything about him, from the inside out.

When she’s left only in her bra and underwear Eddie slows down, taking his time trailing his hands and lips across her newly exposed skin while she writhes blissfully underneath him.  She thinks she gets it now; the appeal of sex.  It had always been something she resented, knowing from an early age that she not only wouldn’t have control over who she would bed for the rest of her life but that her virginity was some kind of bargaining chip.  Something to exchange for more money or land for her father.

This is how it’s supposed to be.  How can it not when this is the most right thing she’s ever felt?

The toe of Steve’s shoe connecting with her shin snaps Nancy out of her daydreams that were a million times more interesting than the chicken and mashed potatoes on her plate in front of her.  When she looks up her mom, siblings, and Steve are all watching her expectantly.  Though Steve is clearly suppressing a smile when he realizes she has no clue why he’d gotten her attention in the first place.  Mike, on the other hand, is not trying to hide his amusement.

“Did you hear me?” her mom asks, a little incredulously.

Nancy opens her mouth, closes it, and slowly opens it again.  “No, I didn’t.  Sorry mom.  Just a little tired from the walk up from town.”

She is tired, but not from the hike.

“Well if it takes such a toll on you maybe you shouldn’t be going down so often,” she says, but Nancy knows she doesn’t mean it.  The fresh air and walk is good for anyone, and her and Steve’s parents are likely hoping one of them will stumble upon a piece of useful information one of these days.  “I asked you what you did there today.”

She did a lot.  After they finally emerged from Eddie’s bedroom- which took a few hours, as they were in no rush to get out of bed and once they did Nancy watched him construct the guitar a little bit more- he grabbed them just enough for lunch.  For once he took them somewhere more public, only after making sure her collar was high enough to cover the few little red marks he’d left on her lower neck.  They sat smack in the middle of town, in front of the town hall.  On one side an older man was playing a flute in his front yard, while on the other, a couples argument played out loud and clear through their open window.

Eddie kissed her dozens of times.  Now that he knew who she was he was more than happy to help prevent her from getting recognized, letting her borrow a hat that hung low on her face that he had to push back every time he wanted to see her.  And with no one recognizing her there was nothing to hide.  Not even how much he liked her.  As if it wasn’t clear in the way he kissed her every chance he got and had yet to completely detach himself from her since they were in his room he made it even more clear by telling her.  Often.

She shrugs and picks her fork back up, pushing around her mashed potatoes before shoving some in her mouth despite how the butterflies in her stomach have dulled her appetite.  Swallowing is a burden she has to make look easy.  Over and over until her plate is cleared.  “I brought down my sketchbook and found a field with all different kinds of flowers and trees.  Got in a lot of good practice.”

It’s only minutes after dinner is over when Nancy and Steve are rushing to the library.  She knows he knows something has changed and there’s no point in denying it.  Especially when she’s just itching to talk about it, and he’s the only one she can ever talk to.  She could tell Mike, he just wouldn’t want to listen.

Once the doors close they dive onto the couch, curling up on opposite sides like giddy children.  “I told Eddie,” she says, unable to hold back a grin that feels like it could easily split her face in two.  While it would be a most gruesome death at least she’d die happily.  “Who I am.  Who my parents are.  That we’re supposed to marry one day.”

One of Steve’s eyebrows shoots up while a smile almost matching hers slowly appears.  “Since you seem so happy I assume it went well.”

Nancy laughs, a girlish giggling sound that has her covering her mouth with one hand while she slumps down against the arm of the couch they’re sitting on.  “You could say that.”

“What made you decide to tell him?” Steve asks, now looking just about as happy for her as she feels.  “I thought you never would, and that one day you’d just disappear when you could no longer go to see him, and let him think you died or something.”

Her stomach sinks a little, since her original plan had been just about that.  Even now the thought of having to tell Eddie they can no longer continue makes her want to stick her head in the crackling fireplace nearby.  And while she’s infinitely happy to have told him the truth she thinks that their inevitable end will be even more painful.  Telling him she would be moving back to the mysterious village that she came from would be a much more plain and simple and predictable heartbreak.  But as it stands they both know they’ll only ever be a few miles walk and a loveless marriage apart.

But now isn’t the time to worry about the end when they’ve only just begun.

“I was planning on it.  But damn him and his lovesick heart, he laid it all out on the table and left me with not much choice but to do the same.  And, God, was I nervous.  Apparently my father raises their rent like it’s some kind of sport, and it’s clear he holds some resentment towards the castle.  Maybe any kind of authority, at that.  But he couldn’t have been kinder and more understanding.”  Nancy lets out a small sigh and leans her head against the couch, arms wrapping around her legs and pulling them close to her chest in a futile attempt to make the ghostly lingering feeling of Eddie’s embrace just a little more real.  “He’s reckless and wild, but he’s also gentle and kind and has such a gentle heart.  And he deserves someone who can commit to him entirely.  But he’s chosen me, knowing good and well I cannot give that to him.”

Steve’s expression falls a little bit as he looks down and adjusts how he’s sitting.  She knows he understands the burden of a sentiment all too well, maybe even more than her.  Sure, the pressure on her is different as a woman whose worth it boiled down to not much more than her eligibility as a wife.  But Steve’s is different as the future of the castle, and of the village that they sneak off to.  What is now they’re oasis will one day be just another part of Steve’s job description.

And while she’s not done throwing the pity party that’s lasted since the engagement was presented to them, and that’s only gotten lonelier since she met Eddie, for once she lets Steve be the star of that show.  She hates this for him.  Her best friend with a heart too big for the life he was born into.  Yes, he deserves a wife who will love him the way that Chrissy does.  But even more so Steve, whose bleeding heart has made all sorts of messes for him over the years, deserves to be a husband to a woman that he can love with his entire being.  This is what he’s meant for.  The crown and its responsibilities aren’t meant for someone like Steve.  But a loving husband and father, a fruitless provider; this is what Steve is meant for.

“You’d really leave everything behind?” Nancy asks.  Maybe it’s different for her, since she has Mike and Holly and the thought of leaving her makes her stomach twist like she might vomit.  “The only place you’ve ever known, with no way to make money and no idea where you’re going?”

“Only if she’d want to.  Or you.  I wouldn’t want to go alone.”

People like Steve aren’t meant to be alone.

Her certainty that she wouldn’t accompany him has greatly dwindled.  One way or another she’ll be spending the rest of her life with Steve, but they’re meant to be nothing more than lifelong friends.  And the more she thinks about it the more she likes the idea of having a little hideout with the people they really love.

“Have you asked her?”

“Not officially, no,” Steve admits while shaking his head a little.  “I wanted to ask you first.  I love Chrissy, really and truly I do.  But I’m not entirely sure I can leave you.”

Nancy only hesitates a moment or two before reaching out into the space between them to grab hold of Steve’s hand.  There’s a childhood scar on his knuckle that, just like all the rest, she remembers exactly how it got there.  “And I’m not entirely sure you’d have to.”

Steve perks up, his puppy dog eyes going a little wide and frantically searching her face, as if trying to decipher if he’d just made up what she said.  “Wait, really?”

“I don’t know yet.  I really don’t.  But now that Eddie knows and still wants me… I don't know how I’m supposed to be able to give that up.”  Even just speaking it into existence makes her stomach tie up in knots.  “He’s close with his uncle, he has friends.  I don’t know if he’d want to go, and I don’t know if I would if he doesn’t.  But if there’s some way that all the pieces can fall into place properly… I’ll go.”

Steve lets out a happy sigh, putting an arm around her and pulling her in for a side hug.  “I’m just glad you’re considering it at all.  I would truly be the luckiest man in the world if you came with us.”

“Have you asked Chrissy?”

“Not properly.  But we’ve talked about it.  Where we would go, what we would do.  I know if I asked she’d say yes.  She isn’t close with her family.  She isn’t close with many people, aside from Eddie I suppose.”  Steve lets out a breathy laugh and shakes his head a little.  “It’s kind of perfect, isn’t it?  That they’re also each other's best friend?”

Nancy groans a little.  “Don’t start saying it’s meant to be.”

“I’m not saying anything.  But I might be thinking it.”

She kicks his foot lightly, but it’s honestly something she can’t argue with.  Nancy isn’t sure how much she believes in fate and all the things Steve puts so much stock in.  Sure, she loves to daydream and let her imagination run wild.  But there’s a difference between daydreaming and building a life on suck dreams.

Still, even she can’t deny that it is a little bit perfect.  If they do this, if they all run away together, there will be no fear of how everyone gets along.

It feels a bit like things want to fall into place entirely on their own accord.  A thought that’s as exhilarating as it is terrifying.

Chapter Text

One of the perks of Eddie knowing exactly who she is is that now he can meet her halfway instead of her having to do the entire trek to and from the castle and the village.  It’s their second time meeting in the middle when they venture into the woods enough to find a small lake- no bigger than a ten foot circumference- with a fallen over tree just beside the shore.  It’s a perfect little clearing that quickly becomes her favorite place ever.

Eddie kisses her and holds her and talks to her like she’s the only woman in the world.  He makes her feel like it.  Nancy never thought it was possible to feel such a way for another person, that this kind of thing only happened in the books she’d read a million times.  If she isn’t already she’s bound to fall in love with him any day.

She doesn’t even realize she’s zoning out, alone in the little world in her head, until Eddie taps a finger against her temple to get her attention.

“Earth to Nancy,” he says, though it’s gentle and full of admiration.  “Where’d you go?”

She offers a sad little smile and wraps his hand up in hers.  “Sorry.  I’ve just got a bit on my mind.”

“Talk to me.”  Eddie moves so he’s stradling the fallen tree, fully facing her.  “I wanna know everything that goes on in there.”  God he’s adorable.  “I wanna know everything that goes on in there.”

She falters, which doesn’t happen often.  Because truthfully she’s thinking of Steve’s plan.  About how much it would break her heart to lose either of the two most important men in her life.  She doesn’t feel ready to verbalize any of the offer to Eddie, but she doubts there will be a better time.  Given she had the courage to bring it up at all.

“It’s… about Steve,” she admits with a small sigh as she starts piecing the words together.  “He’s unhappy with the crown.  And he’s even more terrified than I am about having to marry me.  Chrissy makes him happy.  Which isn’t something his parents will ever allow.  He’s…”  With her free hand she rubs over her face a little, preparing to say the words the same she might prepare to jump off her cliff.  “He’s talking with Chrissy about running away.”

Eddie’s eyes go a little wide while his lips part in surprise.  Just as she suspected, Chrissy hadn’t mentioned it to him.  She doesn’t blame her.  It’s likely weighing heavier on Steve than her.  “Oh, wow.  Really?”

“Yeah.”  She nods a few times.  “He asked if I’d want to come.”

Disappointment.  He tries to hide it, and he does a pretty good job at it.  But Nancy still sees it, and it breaks her heart.  It makes her certain of what she’d been unsure of before.  “What, uh… what did you tell him?”

She takes his hand in both of hers now and pulls them into her lap.  “That I’d miss him very much, but I wouldn’t go with him if you didn’t.”

Shock replaces disappointment.  A specific expression she recognizes from wearing herself so many times because of him.  Did I hear that right?  Did she really just say that?  It’s good to finally be on the delivering side of the feeling.  “... what?”

“If Steve left then I’d no longer be expected to marry him.  And I wouldn’t let my parents control that for me again, even if they hate me for it.”  Nancy hesitates a moment, chewing the side of her cheek while she tries to put to words an impossible feeling.  “I never thought my life could be as exciting as it’s been since I met you.  I’m not ready to give that up, I’m not ready to give you up.”

Eddie’s looking at her like it’s the first time, long enough that for a moment she starts to get a little worried.  But before she gets the chance to dwell on it at all, Eddie's pulling her towards him.  One arm slides under her knees and pulls her into his lap, where he tucks his face into her neck and hugs her tightly.  A small laugh escapes her while she curls up against him, resting her head on top of hers.

“You really mean that?” Eddie asks, almost like he’s scared she’ll say no.

She drapes her arms around his shoulders and presses a kiss to the side of his head.  “I really and truly mean it.”

When Eddie picks his head up again and looks at her he’s smiling at her like she’s the sun.  It’s a look that makes Nancy certain of her decision, however it ends up playing out.  How could she ever leave behind someone who looks at her in such a way?

“How did I get so lucky as to find you?” he asks, one of his hands coming up to cup her face.  They fit together marvelously, like pieces of a puzzle.  “What did I do to deserve it?”

He didn’t have to do anything to deserve it.  In a time where a loving marriage is still somewhat of a rarity, Eddie Munson is undoubtedly the kind of person that deserves to be in the small, blessed pool of husbands.  He’s a bit like Steve in that way, they both ooze love.

The real question should be what did Nancy deserve to be on the receiving end.

Chapter Text

The moon is high in the sky, casting an eerie glow across the castle and its grounds, when Nancy slips out of bed.  But despite the ghostly appearance of her shadowed bedroom she’s giddy.  There’s genuine nervousness mixed in with the butterflies in her stomach, and guilt when she thinks about the morning her family will have.  But she quells this feeling with a promise to herself to send a letter home.  At least to Mike and Holly.

She changes out of her nightclothes, tucking her skirt up into a belt so the hem rests comfortably high above her ankles.  She doesn’t need to trip and break something.  That would be a nightmare.

The bag she pulls from underneath her bed won’t be able to hold nearly as much as she’d like to take with her.  She’ll have to leave her entire collection of books behind, as well as most of her dresses- ones so nice she doubts she’ll ever get the opportunity to wear them again.  And sure, as she looks around her room to make sure she hasn’t forgotten anything there’s an undeniable sadness in how much she’s leaving behind.

But then she thinks about what she’s gaining and it seems to all even out.

Steve is exactly where they agreed to meet, and from the looks of his bag seems to have packed even less than Nancy.  Though they hug, a long and tight embrace, there isn’t much to say.  They also don’t want to take the chance of anyone hearing them.  But what is there to say in such a situation?  How is one supposed to pluck a single thought to say out of the tsunami of emotions and inner monologue they’re both enduring.

Eddie’s uncle Wayne is the only one who got any kind of warning of it all, and it’s a good thing too since he was able to lead them in the direction of housing.  Extended family that ran an inn a few towns away where they could hole up until they got on their feet enough to get a place of their own.

The four of them together.

Eddie and Chrissy wait just off the path about a mile from the castle, only emerging from the trees when they hear their lovers’ voices and know it’s safe.  Steve hugs Chrissy like one might cling to a life preserver.  Nancy’s only met Chrissy a few times, and therefore only seen them together a few times, but she knew from the first moment why Steve thought of her worth risking it all.  Nancy couldn’t have designed someone better for him.  The adoration she wears when she looks at him is the kind that makes Nancy feel confident that she has just as much of a devoted love that Steve does.

Eddie, on the other hand, lifts Nancy off her feet and swings her around a little while he’s practically vibrating with excitement.  Once his one and only hesitation -being able to maintain communication with Wayne- had been quelled he was perhaps the most eager out of the whole group.

He kisses her on her cheek, a loud squealing sound that has her swatting at him and chastising him for being too loud between laughs.

They’re all practically still kids, half of them so secluded from society they’re going to have a learning curve of being out on their own and another on a leash not much tighter.  They have no guarantee of finding a way to make money and no plan past getting to the inn run by a distant Munson.  But with how deep the love between them runs, she knows in her heart it will all fall into place.

The greetings are passionate but quick, and soon they’re jogging down the hill to start their journey that will take the rest of the night.  Running down the hill, midnight air licking at her face and a slight breeze easing its way into her bones, with her hand in Eddie's, the rebel inside of her emerges from her cage.  She’ll never again be confined.