Work Text:
Safety
The last time Maren felt safe was in her mother’s womb.
It was a completely different world there.
That world loved her, more importantly, her mother loved her.
Until she entered the "real" world.
Kicking.
Screaming.
Biting.
A lovely gift from her mother.
A stamp, a tragedy, a curse.
Mommy’s perfect little creation
Turned into a monster before she even turned four years old.
After that Maren didn’t feel safe anymore.
So she had to find an alternative.
She chooses books. Stacks and Stacks tucked into corners and packed in boxes. Each time she and her father moved she took one with her. Her spit-tainted pages and bunny ear corners made her feel normal.
Until she got paper cuts, flipping through the same pages over and over. They became blood-stained like the parts of her mind that she tried to pack away when she thought about tearing the kids in her eleventh-grade class apart with her teeth.
She hates those thoughts.
Those thoughts aren’t safe.
When her dad leaves her, she cries for two days straight. Once her tears dry, she packs her bag and sets off to find her mom.
The only safety she’s ever known since she was born.
But first, she finds Lee.
Lee is explosive, a flustering fireball ….
And he can be as sweet and as warm as a summer breeze.
She finds the softness in his hands, the way they rub circles in her back. The way his lips curve when she catches his gaze.
She was supposed to be finding safety in others. Turns out he found safety in her. Her hands are now holding a heart she didn’t know what to do with.
Turns out her mother is just a shell. A hollow shell that has been plucked dry and doomed to crack and whither away.
So she runs.
She’s lost on the backroads, the weathering fields, and muddy lakes.
She reads a lot, finding a sense of warmth in that.
She misses him.
July comes full force, boiling, and she constantly ties her hair in a bun. Her clothes are still soaked.
Maren finds Kayla, who leads her back to Lee.
They are engulfed in fireworks, fiery, and bright.
They feel reborn.
She feels hopeful.
They get an apartment (don’t ask how)
They go to school, shop together, go on long drives,
She welcomes normalcy with open arms.
Then it’s ripped away from her.
Suffering in a pool of blood.
Her love, her only, her auburn sunshine.
Gone.
She’s never felt a loss like this.
It’s cold and lingers in her bones.
She wonders why safety is so afraid of her.
Why must it slam the door in her face and lock itself away with a key?
But she’s so tired. Tired of being nice. She kicks that door down.
Sinking her teeth into it, the blood-filled up in her mouth.
Maren and Safety become one.