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Sweet, almost chokingly sweet. The taste of raspberry chocolate lingers on his lips for a little while, sticky yet smooth. Truly, one could say this was the highest quality one could find in artisan chocolates, not that Xiao Fengyue had a history of anything else to compare to.
Today wasn’t the best morning for Xiao Fengyue, he had almost woken up late and tripped over some wires while getting ready, then he also found out one of his guqin strings broke, and he ran out of bread for breakfast. Life was picking on him today and Xiao Fengyue had to go open the Golden House cafe at 5 AM all upset that he had to pop open the fancy box of chocolates one of the patrons in his last traditional music ensemble had gifted his team to make himself feel better. He hadn’t even brought it home yet, its red and white tin can box still sitting inside the Cafe kitchen because he was savoring it so much. It’s not everyday you get a $1000 dollar box of chocolates.
“So, who is it that our Xiao Fengyue had enamored to be given such a pretentious, I mean cough, precious gift?” One of his coworkers asks, preparing the stuffed croissants for display. Sunday mornings were slow, save for the occasional senior citizen who would always come before 8 AM and they’d usually have time to chat in-between work.
“Cut it out,” Xiao Fengyue huffs. “She was a nice elderly lady.”
“Oh, but this isn’t the first time you’ve been sent some kind of gift here.”
Of course, Hong Xiu was only being honest. Throughout his period of working in the cafe, he’d receive several gifts given to him by people of different interests. Unfortunately, it always seemed to happen when Hong Xiu was at the counter so she was always put on the spot.
“Gifts are precious, even when they are sought for monetary value.” That was how Xiao Fengyue had always thought of his life, one could spend every second hanging by a note of the zither, filling up each meter of silence. You had to wait, to savor things, to preserve them, and keep them close. But perhaps, people tell him he may be a little too patient with how things slip away.
“You’re right about that.” She sighs. Hell, if the person she treasured gave her a cheap pin to keep, she’d treasure it for the rest of her life. “Mn, but I wonder when it is that you’ll really find— okay, I’ll get back to the pastries. Someone’s entering.” Hong Xiu says quickly.
“Hey baby.”
“Oh?”
Xiao Fengyue’s back is still turned from the counter, immersed in his conversation with his co-worker until the pet name slipped out from the person’s mouth, voice bright and lively. Immediately, he faces the counter to see who had entered, assuming the customer was probably on his phone, however all he was met with was a tall man in a black button down, a golden badge by his chest, his eyes were sparkling, covered by a few strands of dark hair over his face. His gaze lands eventually on Xiao Fengyue, and as if his smile couldn’t get any bigger, it only widens upon seeing the barista . “Sorry, I— did I startle you? I have a habit of saying hello to the animals around me. I may have been too loud.”
“N-no.” Xiao Fengyue stammers, he most definitely did not think that was directed at him. “It’s fine, we greet Croiffle every morning too.”
“Croiffle?’ The man raises his eyebrow in amusement, looking at the beige and white cat sitting by the cafe doorway. “Cute name. He does kinda look like one.”
“Mn, he’s like a flat croissant.” He giggles, not mentioning the fact that he was actually the one who named this cat.
“That’s an adorable way of looking at it.” He nods his head. “Oh— I came here to order, haha.” The man shakes his head, bringing out his phone to check the order list.“It’s a pretty big one, is that okay?”
“It’s fine, but you’ll have to wait a bit.”
“That’s alright. So five large americanos, 2 matcha lattes, 3 caramel macchiatos and..do you by any chance have anything new?”
“What kind of new?”
“Hm, I used to order from secret menus, perhaps a different kind of drink? Sorry, it might be troublesome, however.”
“It’s okay.” Xiao Fengyue’s mouth works faster than his brain. “I mean, I could probably make you something, any allergies?”
“None.”
“Alright. Name, please?”
“Yang LiuAn,” he says very slowly, as if wanting him to capture every single syllable. Xiao Fengyue had to pause a little before picking up the cups.
Xiao Fengyue quickly makes up his mind on what to make for him. “Alright, here’s the total.”
When Yang LiuAn brings out his wallet, Xiao Fengyue captures a glimpse of his ID, the familiar logo of a corporation right around the block printed on top. Previously, someone else from that company was assigned to order their drinks, although he rarely saw him nowadays. Could this be a new hire? It didn’t seem that way however, the air of confidence he brought around him felt like Yang LiuAn was already well-experienced.
Ater paying with the company card, Xiao Fengyue heads into the kitchen to help out with the custom request. Obviously, he took more than he could chew. Although he’d been working here for almost a year now, he was definitely no culinary genius. The drinks he made for himself were pretty basic and…actually Xiao Fengyue wasn’t too sure why he was so keen on impressing this man. Admittedly, his cheerful disposition did bring some comfort to his current state so he was willing to try his best.
“Oh Someone’s trying to impress.” Hong Xiu notes, seeing her co-worker bring out the new equipment.
“Sea salt caramel mocha, does that sound fine?” Of course, he wanted to be on the safer side so as not to ruin the store’s reputation. He could start by using his personal favorite as a base.
“A mocha? Yeah, probably— hey, you’re using the chocolates?! Honey, that's like 600 Yuan a piece, be serious.”
Xiao Fengyue's cheeks are warm. “I just thought it could work, make the texture a little bit creamier and thicker and..at least it’s going to taste good.” He makes quick work of the drink, melting the chocolate after the first shot of espresso then adding some foam and the salted caramel lattice over the mixture, sprinkling a few crumbs of chocolate chips as well. It looked pretty decent, although he hadn’t gotten the chance to make a few extra for tasting.
“I thought you wanted to save them?”
“I do, but I can’t possibly have all of these for myself, right?”
“Yeah, you could’ve given them to me.”
“Very funny, Hong Xiu. I definitely did not notice you sneaking one a while ago.”
“And you definitely did not let me take it.” She rolls her eyes. “Go along, you made a mocha not latte art, he may seem nice but it’s only a matter of time before he gets impatient.”
Hong Xiu and Xiao Fengyue bring out the batch of drinks after a short while, Hong Xiu resumes back to her post in the kitchen while Xiao Fengyue wraps the rest of the items up. “Will you be alright carrying all of these by yourself?”
“Oh, don’t worry about that. Look what I got. Yang LiuAn raises a finger and proudly brings out a piece of folded fabric that unfolded into a small box, able to store several drinks at once. “I bought it online.”
Cute . Xiao Fengyue’s head short circuits with how endearing the scene was. It wasn’t even anything unusual, he’s only met the man for a grand total of fifteen minutes and he was causing a wreck of emotions within him already. He doesn’t even know the first thing about him.
“I’m looking forward to the drink you chose, by the way.”
Goodness, if he kept speaking like this Xiao Fengyue really wouldn’t be able to handle it. “It’s nothing too adventurous.”
Yang LiuAn zips up the bag. “Then I’ll come back here sometime again to try out more, no?”
“Feel free.”
“Thanks, Xiao Fengyue.”
Xiao Fengyue waves, hoping maybe he’d notice the little heart he’d drawn on the lid.
Today was actually the last day of Xiao Fengyue’s morning shift, still on opening duty. Most of the employees usually rotated every few months and it was only a week before it was his turn for closing which was perfect because holiday season was coming up and the performance invites for his ensemble was increasing by the day which meant he needed to attend morning practice. His part-time job at the cafe merely started off because his year had been too hectic after having just moved places, now the old music academy he used to teach at was too far and he had to earn a bit more before considering setting up his own classes again.
Truth be told, having to move killed him a little. There were plenty of memories in his old city a couple of hours away. But it was in this cafe he got to know plenty more people. The places they worked at, the type of drink they liked, It was all so different and fresh, admittedly, it even gave him better inspiration for playing.
Despite the romantic joys of finding a spot in the busy city, of course, one of the most taxing things aside from customer service was having to manually manage the deliveries. Sacks of flour, some coffee beans, and the whipped cream that they had made last night— he had to transfer them to various containers. Quickly, Xiao Fengyue brings out the discarded bags to the trash before adding in the new stocks. It was still quite chilly outside and the sunrise hadn’t fully crept up yet so it was lonely to be out this early.
“Oh, hi.” A familiar voice greets him, suddenly emerging from the dark. Xiao Fengyue squints, making out an outline of the customer he had yesterday, dressed in a thick jacket.
“It’s you.”
“You remember!” He smiles. “Morning, it must be busy for you.”
“Goodmorning.” He greets in return. Well it seems I can start the day off right. He thinks quietly. “Opening usually is.”
“Mhm, goodluc-” The words flow from his lips before Yang Liuan hesitantly stops. “Actually, mind if I help you?”
By then, Xiao Fengyue is able to take a good look at his pristine uniform under the jacket. “Thanks, but it’s too much trouble for you. I’m used to it.”
“But it can’t be fun to do it all by yourself.”
It is by this point that Xiao Fengyue remembers the little heart he drew on the cup yesterday. Oh god. He can’t actually tell if this friendliness came from that or the fact that he didn’t notice or made no comment on it.
“Won’t you be late?” He asks after a few minutes of pondering over whether or not he was actually letting someone he met yesterday before opening hours.
“No, don’t worry. I always come earlier. Seems like both you and I are similar in that aspect.”
Xiao Fengyue nods, a bit happy that someone understood him. “It’s nice to get some time in the morning to think. I assume it must be quite hectic with your situation too.”
“Oftentimes, but it’s mostly routine work. Writing reports, overseeing the staff and managing teams, all that exciting stuff.” He laughs. “ Here, let me get this box for you.”
What seemed to be an hour before opening felt twice as long, suddenly, Xiao Fengyue didn’t need to rush everything all at once. He could take his time picking up the boxes and transferring flour into bins. Yang Liuan’s pleasant chatter filled the silence, and it’s like he could touch the passage of time. What a talen t, he thinks. To have such a good command of his attention.
“Would you like a cup? It’s on the house.” Xiao Fengyue doesn't know why he’s shaking a little when he says it. They’ve finished all the needed work.
“Another specialty drink please,”
“Alright, I might have something in min-”
Yang Liuan chokes. “I was kidding, I was kidding! You don’t have to I swear.”
Xiao Fengyue raises an eyebrow then laughs. “You don’t have to be so polite. It’s the least I can do…besides, did you like the last drink?”
Yang Liuan forgets to reply for a moment, a bit dazed. “Oh, yeah. I did!”
“Great, then maybe I can work around that, especially since new stocks came in. I’ll enter the kitchen first, okay?”
“Sure, I’ll wait.”
Xiao Fengyue enters the kitchen and peers over the window to find Yang LiuAn taking a few selfies. At least he seems to be enjoying himself. He thinks, before pulling up the box of chocolates he left in the cafe fridge to make another concoction, this time combining berries and coffee for a hint of tartness. Then, he added just enough cold foam on top to be able to add bits of strawberries floating on the ‘clouds’. It was an easy drink, similar to an old limited edition menu they had so it wasn’t long before he presented the cup.
However, Yang LiuAn had noticed something else instead, worry flashing in his face. “Are you alright? I haven’t noticed your hands..?” Yang LiuAn points at Xiao Fengyue’s right hand wrapped in white cloth.
Xiao Fengyue smiles sheepishly. Truth be told, it wasn’t that big of a deal. He usually wrapped his hands after guqin practice even if it didn’t really hurt anymore, his hands have long since been used to such strenuous work. It was almost comparable to seeing a ballerina wrap their feet, it was a certain kind of pain and pride only the artist could ever be accustomed to. But seeing the look of tenderness and concern on his face, he can’t help but feel a little helpless.
“Just a scratch from yesterday, Don’t mind it.” He waves off.
“I have something that can help.” He brings out a band aid from his pocket and hands it over to him.
“Oh uh-”
In the midst of his sentence, Yang LiuAn’s phone rings. “Oh shoot, I need to go. I almost forgot I agreed to an emergency meeting. Haha. Thank you, so much! I’ll come by again, for sure!” He says hurriedly, picking up his drink and rushing to the door. In a split second, he had already disappeared.
Xiao Fengyue shakes his head at the speed of which he runs off to, unable to say anything more, then he looks at the band aid in his hands and laughs.
“Well, it is I who should be thanking you.”
Since that day, Yang LiuAn had been coming over frequently throughout the months, Xiao Fengyue felt bad that he was always the one designated to buy their coffees but sometimes he only came by to purchase his own. It seemed he had a pretty good position up there, though, so maybe he really was just a generous boss? He hadn’t had the heart to ask or converse much about his life, although they did occasionally talk about their day, he was still afraid to be a bit too personal. Still, Yang LiuAn remained as adventurous as ever in his drink choices and it actually turned out to be a fun little game for the both of them.
Today, though, Yang LiuAn hadn’t come all day and it was already past closing hour. It might be silly to expect someone to come so consistently, but his presence had become as permanent as Croiffle sitting by the glass panes and Xiao Fengyue may have gotten a little too attached to it. Mindlessly his hand ghosts over where he had previously given him bandage. Although it’s long been healed already, he can’t help but think of that memory warmly.
Xiao Fengyue sighs as he opens his umbrella after locking the doors. It had been pouring since the afternoon, effectively dimming his mood. Still, the well-lit buildings of the city reflect upon the wet concrete. Still hanging his head down low, he hears the splish-splash of shoes against the puddles walking up to him. Lifting his eyes, his heart suddenly skips a beat at the sight of a man in front of him.
“LiuAn!” He says a bit too excitedly.
“Hey, haha. Missed me?” Yang LiuAn jokes, hair a bit wet from the rain. “Sorry I couldn’t come a while ago, we actually had to travel to our other office, we just got back a while ago.”
“It’s okay. You don’t have to feel like you have to come here everyday.”
Yang LiuAn’s eyebrows quiver faintly, he opens his mouth but quickly closes it, turning away.
“I was just about to go home. Though I doubt there are cabs around this time. ”
“Just our luck, huh? I didn’t bring my car today either.” He sighs. “Although, we can both walk to the waiting shed nearby, are you willing?”
Xiao Fengyue’s eyes widened. Oh . They were actually going together. Like actually walking together, going the same path together, and well…okay, perhaps Xiao Fengyue was spiraling too much.
“Sure, we can share my umbrella if you want so it’s less of a hassle.”
A comfortable silence envelops them as they walk slowly, matching each other’s pace. While Xiao Fengyue enjoyed the peaceful serenity, he couldn’t keep his mind off a million other things. Something inside of him was screaming. Now's your chance! And he truly did want to push their conversations further, or maybe try to express his interest.
“So uhm.. Did you ever like any of your surprise requests?” That wasn’t as direct as he wanted to be.
Yang LiuAn opens his mouth.
“—a nd I want you to be honest, okay?! ”
“Well..some were better than others I must admit.” He says slowly.
“Really like what?”
“The mocha was great, but the salted caramel was a bit too salty. I think.”
“No way.” Xiao Fengyue flushes in embarrassment. “Why didn’t you tell me?!” He did make a separate mixture for Yang LiuAn’s orders, which is why he probably hadn’t received any other comments from the other customers.
“I forget to. And I feel as if it’s part of the experience.”
Maybe Yang LiuAn was just too nice. “Oh nooo…”
Yang LiuAn puts his hand on his shoulder. “Relax. It’s fine, I promise. I enjoyed everything else, when daily life can get repetitive, having a surprise was something nice to look forward to.”
“It’s not the same if it’s not enjoyable….” Xiao Fengyue bites his lip. “But it’s nice though, no? Having such consistency in a life like yours. I admire it.” How on most days I can count on the fact that you’ll come.
The breeze was quite cold, something about the tips of his fingers started to buzz. Looking at Yang LiuAn, it seems his hair had grown longer, and only he realizes it. Already, he has memorized every single bit of his face and..
“Actually I.. just wanted to talk to you more.” The confession comes out of the blue and it leaves Xiao Fengyue stunned. Yang LiuAn looks at him with those same wide eyes, his mouth turned upwards, always ready to smile. Xiao Fenguue pretends he doesn’t notice, pretends he’s innocently unaware of what he’s expecting, Yang LiuAn brushes the hair off his face and mentally prepares himself.
“It seems like I’m just throwing words at you right now but actually I… wanted to ask you out on a date.”
Xiao Fengyue doesn’t answer, and by now it’s painfully obvious even Yang LiuaAn was on edge. “Oh, you’ve gotten wet.” He peers over the taller male’s shoulder, the rain already soaking half of his upper arm. “Sorry. Bad habit, I got worried.”
Yang LiuAn shakes his head. Oh if only, if only Xiao Fengyue was aware of how adorable he looked right now. “You’re always worrying. It’s okay. And you also don’t have to answer me now if you’re not interested, I—”
“No, wait!” Xiao Fengyue’s hand grasps Yang LiuAn’s arm, stopping him from turning away. “I’ll answer you.” Leaning so close to him, Xiao Fengyue’s head spins a little, having to look up to meet Yang LiuAn’s eyes.
“Mn.”
“Yes. I am interested, I do want to get to know you more.” Xiao Fengyue hopes he’s saying the right things because at this point he feels as if his entire soul was just pulled out of his body and his mouth was running faster than his brain.
Even Yang LiuAn takes a bit of time to process. “R-really?!” He takes Xiao Fengyue’s hand to hold. “Oh, I'm so glad. I was so worried. We can go anywhere you like, I think you might be a little sick of cafes now though.”
Turns out, between the two of them, it was probably Yang LiuAn who had been holding his breath the longest, and now that he was able to breathe, his mouth was running at the speed of light as Xiao Fengyu patiently waited for him to finish.
They manage to discuss their date before having to part, agreeing on a time and place. Just before Yang LiuAn had to leave, Xuiao Fengyue reaches his arm out for a hug but decides against it, feeling as if it was too early.
No matter, they could take their time.
As they say, nothing good gets away.
For the umpteenth time, Yang LiuAn checks himself in the mirror to see if he still had a decent expression plastered on his face because twenty-something minutes ago his boss, the ever so benevolent and noisy Xiao Yu’An had caught him scrolling through dating advice websites online and pointed out how noticeable happier he’s gotten.
Xiao Fengyue was merely a few minutes away from the museum they had planned to meet at. For this month, there was an exhibit of different historical instruments to other unique and quirky ones. Yang LiuAn had suggested visiting considering Xiao Fengyue’s other line of work and passion, along with the secret fact that Yang LiuAn had made so many more preparations ahead. The project head of the exhibit was one of their old company’s partners, with a bit of conversation, he managed to land early tickets along with a reservation at the museum’s newly added restaurant located at an annex building right beside it. They could spend the entire afternoon there and have lunch. Unfortunately, Yang LiuAn could only take half of the day off, he had to report to his office during the night shift for some emergency. Xiao Fengyue was very understanding of this and even offered to see him off at his office.
“Wow you’re so pretty.”
“You look great too.” Xiao Fengyue replies.
“I hope so. Considering all I coil wear are work clothes. I think I’m matching with the museum security.”
Xiao Fengyue chuckles. “Okay, maybe you actually do.” But the uniform worked wonders on him
They begin walking around the exhibit, starting with the visual arts section first going through several displays of skill in traditional art of ink and silk, then arriving at contemporary oil portraits. They saved the music exhibit for last, a new section on the marbled floor well lit by warm lights. Across the room was an assortment of string and percussion instruments along with their estimated price.
Xiao Fengyue peers over the glass and sighs dreamily at a well-polished guqin that had a pretty carving between its frames. This was a guqin worth millions, used in several international performances.
“You know, I’ve once had your company members as my audience for last year’s new year performance. It was at a hotel in the North, there was an opera and then our ensemble. A full showcase.”
Yang LiuAn can’t help but feel a bit jealous, wanting to see how Xiao Fengyue looked when performing. “Really? I would’ve loved to listen to you play.”
“Perhaps you have? I’ve done several performances across the country.”
“Mn, don’t think our paths have crossed. If it did, surely I would have remembered you.”
“LiuAn!” Xiao Fengyue whines.
“I’m serious!”
Xiao Fengyue scrunches his nose, trying to hide how that actually made his heart skip a beat. “I’ll play for you sometime. Let’s go and stand there to take a picture.” He leads Yang LiuAn by the arm, bringing him over to the pretty screen display of a montage of performances, snapping a few selfies.
“LiuAn, look at the camera, will you?”
“Sorry.” He smiles. “You just really look so pretty.”
“You’re so..” Xiao Fengyue didn’t know how to respond. It seemed Yang LiuAn had been gaining confidence already, and although this was also the advancement Xiao Fengyue wanted, he also wondered how to reciprocate a similar energy. “Well, you look great too.”
“Haha, well I hope so. All I have on are work clothes.”
The first date was great. It felt like they’ve known each other for a while already, and perhaps that was partly true, except there was no counter splitting them. Now Yang LiuAn was riddled with the problem of how to finish this date, by now it had already gotten dark and he’d have to leave soon. They had already stopped by the building’s entrance.
“Fengyue, come here.” He motions for the other man to lean forward. “I brought you some hand warmers since it’s always cold when you’re out. I noticed you didn’t have them a while ago so I picked these up when we went to the convenience store.”
“Oh, right!” Xiao Fengyue laughs. “I did forget to bring them, but I thought it’d be fine since we were mostly indoors.”
Yang LiuAn shakes his head, putting the warmers on both of his hands. “Take care of your hands alright? I’m still holding onto that performance of yours.”
“Oh, don’t worry. A musician’s hands are made of steel, it can’t get any tougher than this.”
He sighs. Of course, it was always the caring ones who usually forgot to take care of themselves. “Do you like it?”
“Mn, thank you.”
The breeze ruffles over his hair and Yang LiuAn pauses, hands still lingering on Xiao Fengyue’s. There’s nothing to say anymore but to say goodbye, and yet, still, he does not dare leave.
“Oh, hey! Senior Yang! ” Yang LiuAn suddenly hears a voice from a co-worker barreling through the office doors. “You’re back. Could you come with me to the logistics department in a bit? I'll wait for you by the elevator. Boss said you had the storage key for the new uniforms.” The employee had said it so quickly that Yang LiuAn didn’t even have a chance to reply before he went inside the building, now turning the tender silence between them into an awkward one.
“It seems..I have to go?” Xiao Fengyue says sheepishly, but he does not fail to notice the hands still wrapped around his.
“Hold on a moment.” He pulls him closer, surveying every inch of his face, from his eyes down to his lips, lingering just a bit that he could feel the warmth spread throughout his cheeks. “Can I kiss you?”
In a moment of bravery, Xiao Fengyue says nothing more, cupping his face and tilting his head upwards, motioning for Yang LiuAn to follow, pressing his lips and melting in the softness. It’s like he became aware of everything around him and he could feel how Yang LiuAn’s hands shifted to holding him by the waist.
It seems there was nothing to worry about, already, that kiss alone had raised Xiao Fengyue’s body temperature to the hundreds.
It’s been a couple months since they’ve both made their relationship official and Yang LiuAn couldn’t be happier. Oftentimes,he’d stare into the distance just lovestruck, wondering how it is he’s managed to find someone as amazing as Xiao Fengyue.
From the bedroom, he manages to get up and find his boyfriend practicing the guqin on the floor, a sweet melody from the latest drama that just came out. They binged it the night before when he invited Xiao Fengyue to stay over and one thing led to another and now he’s been staying in his home for three days.
“Are you fully awake now?”
“Mhm, not yet. Still sleepy.” he smiles, crawling toward Xiao Fengyue’s unoccupied lap and slipping underneath his arms “Is it hard to play like this?”
“No, but I might accidentally hit you.”
“Accidentally, sure.”
“LiuAn.”
“Kidding, A-Yue. You know when you play like this early in the morning I feel as if I’ve been transported back to the era of historical dramas, it’s surreal.”
“Yes, yes. That’s the point of this piece. Now, young master, tell me what it is you’d like for breakfast so I can prepare it later.”
“You don’t have to, you already did that yesterday. I’ll get to it. I have tea leaves.”
“Your company also sells tea, of course you have lots of them. Still, I don’t have any faith you’re actually awake enough to handle a kettle. I’ll prepare the drinks.” Xiao Fengyue doesn’t know why he bothers having a proper conversation with someone still out of the loop. Yesterday had been such a hectic work day, it seems it had knocked out Yang LiuAn’s usual early-bird attitude.
Still, it felt quite intimate to be the only one seeing him like this. When he looks at this handsome face, Xiao Fengyue can’t help but remember the taste of those expensive chocolates that he’s long since used up. Even though some of his mixtures weren’t always according to taste, it seems that some things were worth jumping into.
Yang LiuAn doesn’t reply, already being lulled to sleep once more by the soft vibrations of the strings and Xiao Fengyue’s warmth.
“Hey, you haven't answered me. What do you want?”
Yang LiuAn couldn’t remember their previous conversation. “Nothing,” he says softly. “Nothing new. Only you.”
Xiao Fengyue smiles, remembering raspberry chocolate.
Sweet, almost chokingly sweet.