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Chapter Text

Rolling fields of Joogleberry flash past, the High Soldier bickers with High Healer about drinks. The High Alchemist smiles at him, she reaches over placing her immaculately manicured hands over his. “I know you're scared Coran, but don’t worry. I will…” Her voice fades into the distance like the farm did, like his family did, like the only world he’d ever known did. “Coran, look at me,” she gently guided his chin towards her. The perfect city accent was foreign and terrifyingly different. Her eyes were firm but gentle, as were her words; “You are going to do amazing things.”

~

“You’re probably wondering why I gathered you all here today.” mused Shiro, pulling him from his daze.
“It’s about Keith and Lance.”
“Oh yeah, definitely.”
“It’s exhausting, really.”
The Black Paladin’s eyes widened in surprise. Number 5 pipes up, “Sorry Shiro, but it is kind of our biggest problem right now.” That caught his attention, “Surely it can’t be that bad?” Allura frowns, she has her father’s frown, and Number 4 lets out a low whistle. “Oh it’s bad Coran. Really bad. One time we nearly fell over because Lance: had to prove a point.” He accompanies the last five words with those strange earth gestures. He has a vague memory of the aforementioned Paladin calling them sky quotes…no air quotes.
The Green Paladin jumps up. “And then we nearly lost the shield because Keith just couldn’t let Lance prove said point.”
“And remember that time Keith nearly sliced the castle in half?”
“Or the time Lance nearly shot Shiro.”
“How could I forget?”
“Or the time when we literally couldn’t form Voltron.”
“What!” Allura gasps. Coran whips his head round and stares at the princess. She’s dead Coran, her daughter just sounds like her. He shakes his head, comprehending what the Yellow Paladin just said. Having trouble forming Voltron was one thing but not being able to… The Coalition relies on Voltron, especially with the new quintessence ships the Galra have been developing. Allura draws herself up straight, “This can’t last. We need a plan, a solution.”
City accent. Foreign. Terrifyingly different.
“We could just stick ‘em in a room together.”
You’re being removed from classes with the others.
“Really…”
Train with the Crown Prince. Protect him. Your duty.
“It could work.”
Before you fight, you will be doing a team building exercise.
“You’re insane.”
They are more important than you think young mage. You’ll be going on an easy mission together.
“I think I have an idea.”
All eyes turn to him, inquisitive. He clears his throat, “I think we should send them on a team building exercise.” He barely finishes his sentence before he’s met with groans and pushback. He remembers the High Soldiers words. “I know you may be opposed at first but they are more important than you think. Why not send them on an easy mission.” He sees them consider it for a while and he decides to top off his point by looking at the Princess, stating: “It worked for me and your father.” He notices the change of attitude immediately and smiles at the power he holds.
The Black Paladin follows suit, “I mean does anyone have a better idea?” The Green Paladin pushes her glasses up her nose and her lips twist into a smile that is positively evil. “I mean as long as I don’t have to do anything.” Number 4 shrugs and Allura turns to the main control pad. “Then it’s settled,” her face slowly shifts into a mirror of Number 5’s, “and I know the perfect assignment.”

Chapter Text

Lance had many things about himself he could brag about. For one he was an amazing pilot (definitely better than Keith) and he was good with a gun. He could play guitar and sing. And along with being able to swim and doing gymnastics for 5 years, he was a pretty well rounded individual thank you very much. But one thing overshadowed all other abilities he had and that was that Lance was a genius. 

In self care related things.

He never had that awkward faze in middle school. Acne? Non-existent. Hair? Always perfect. Teeth? You could blind yourself if you looked at them for too long. He was well known through the castle for his extensive morning routine but he was unashamed of it. Did it take him an inordinately long amount of time to get to breakfast? Maybe. But that hour after and before he went to sleep each day, that control he had over that small portion of his life, grounded him more than anything else. It, and yes he knows this is a lot of pressure to put on a facial routine, helped him feel complete.

 Which is why he really didn’t want to be interrupted whilst he was trying to create a new one made up entirely of products he’d never seen before. But he supposed he could make an exception for the Princess when her voice echoed through the castle requesting the Paladins’ presence on the Bridge. 

~

 When he arrived at the bridge he was surprised to find everyone already there, well almost everyone. He furrowed his brow, “Am I late?”

“Not at all Number 3 in fact you’re just on time.” Coran’s face holds some mischief to it which only furthers Lance’s suspicion.

Allura turns to face the giant holographic screen and begins her briefing. “There is a planet in the quadrant next to this one that we believe the Galra is using as a base to build these new ships we’ve heard chatter about.”

“So we go, Voltron it up in there and the problem is solved.” 

“I would rather start with a recon mission, an undercover one to be specific-”

“I’m in.” Lance had barely given the Princess a chance to finish her sentence. He loved undercover missions, the disguises and deception were always his favourite part of the spy movies he’d watch with Luis.

Luis . 

He missed him.

“Thank you for the enthusiasm Lance.” Allura smiled at him and his stomach did a little flip. “The planet's official name is E-43M but the resort that covers its entirety, our target, is known as Madame Erona’s Love Emporium. We think that she is in cohorts with the Galra but…she’ll only talk to couples.”

Lance nearly got whiplash from how fast he looked away from the window. “So Princess,” he put on his best Hot Love Interest In Every Movie™ smoulder, “want to team up?” He heard Pidge snicker in the distance but can she really blame him for shooting his shot? 

“I’m sorry Lance,” and she did sound so, a little bit. “But I’m afraid if one of the only Alteans left in the universe showed up she might put two and two together.” 

Lance tried to hide his disappointment but judging by the sympathetic look Allura gave him he wasn’t doing a great job at it. He turned to Hunk, raising an eyebrow, but before he could say something Shiro was interrupting him.

“Absolutely not, you and Hunk can’t look at each other without laughing. It would blow your cover.” 

“That’s not true! Right Hunk?”

They made eye contact and immediately burst into laughter. Lance sighed exasperatedly, “Anyone else?”

“Too old.”

“Even older.” 

“Come near me and you’re dead.”

 He shrugged, “Guess we’ll send another pair.” He flopped down into the blue chair in defeat and stared back out the window. The others make eye contact, taking turns to glance at each other. He must have missed something.

Coran turns to him and narrows his eyes. “Not necessarily.”

A soft ping from behind grabs his attention and Keith walks in. “Sorry. I was training,” he admits sheepishly. Slowly Lance connects the dots.

No.

Chapter Text

Keith’s life, no matter what people say, is completely fine. I mean he lives alone in a shack in the middle of the desert, in Texas (because of course it's in Texas). So what if his Dad died when he was five and the foster system really sucked. And yeah, people have always assumed the worst of him because of where he came from. But so what if, Shiro was the only person who ever truly believed in him and his death sent him in a downward spiral of self destruction.

Okay, maybe his life wasn’t the greatest. 

Things are better here though, in the vast emptiness of space where he’s a hero and every alien he meets immediately loves him. There’s only one small problem. Lance. Keith doesn’t know what it is but the guy just gets on his nerves, every little trait of his makes Keith’s skin crawl. He knows it's bad, knows it affects Voltron but he can’t help it. 

So he tries to channel his anger into the fight, waking up at five in the morning to avoid anyone but Shiro. Keith’s not a social person and Shiro knows his outbursts aren’t anything serious but with literally anyone else it would make they’re already tedious relationship worse. So he keeps to himself, after all he always has, he doesn’t really think anyone would even want to talk to him anyways. 

But he’ll still do his job which is why he rushes to the bridge the moment he’s put on less sweaty clothes.

~

When he arrives everyone else is there. “Sorry.” He smiles awkwardly. “I was training.” His eyes land on Lance’s horrified face. Did someone die or something? Allura must notice his confusion because she gestures to the screen.

“We are planning an undercover mission on this planet.” She explains the situation and the plan. Which sounds…interesting. He doesn’t think he’ll be volunteering for this one.

“You and Lance will be going.”

“What!”

Lance walks towards the Princess, “Allura please, you want this mission to be a success. Right?” He nods slowly but vigorously as if talking to a child.

 Allura stares at him, unimpressed. “I have made my decision Lance.”

“I’m just thinking what’s best for the Voltron here.”

“Yeah you may not have noticed but Lance and I hate each other.” He tries to keep the sarcasm out of his voice but it’s undeniable. He hears Pidge scoff, muttering about ‘Definitely noticing it.’

Shiro walks over and places a hand on his shoulder, “The whole point of the Love Emporium is that she talks to couples with problems and helps them through it. Doesn’t it make sense that we send the most dysfunctional pair on the team?” Keith feels himself deflate a little. Although he still hates this, Shiro does have a point. 

Lance, unsurprisingly, is failing to see the logic in this. “So you’re sending us to couple therapy. ” 

“I suppose we are.”

“Yeah, no thanks.”

Allura gracefully walks over to Lance, “I’m surprised Lance you were very enthusiastic before.”                                                       Lance frowns, “Well I wasn’t going with Keith before.” 

“Thanks Lance, that's really kind.”

“Oh shut your quiznak Keith.”

“You’re still not using that correctly.”

“Like you would know. It’s not like you’re an alien or anything.”

“Look, just because you’re not going with Allura doesn’t mean you give up on the mission.” He hisses. Lance goes red and clenches his fists. They’re foreheads are touching at this point and Keith feels seconds away from exploding.

“Oh, because you never give up. Dropout.”

It’s a good thing Shiro knows him so well that he rushed over to grab his wrist or Keith doesn’t know what would've happened. The air around them is tense when he looks back at Lance he looks almost…guilty like there’s a ‘sorry’ on the tip of his tongue. Even someone as dense as him knows that was too far.

Allura draws herself to her full height and clears her throat, “Lance, Keith you’re going and that’s final. It’s a week long trip so go pack.”

~

Shiro’s sitting on his bed cross legged (because no matter what the others think of him he’s literally a child) watching him furiously shove the second pair of clothes Coran had given him into a bag. “It might not be that bad, it could be a learning experience and- is that a machete?”

He looks up at him, “Yeah,” he shrugs.

“W-why?”

“I might need it.”

“You have your bayard.” Shiro says it like it's obvious. Keith will never understand other people when it comes to blades. Half the fun of owning sharp things is carrying them around with you! Shiro sighs, “Look just…don’t screw this up.”

“Your faith in me is admirable.”

“ Keith .”

“I know. I know. Don’t kill Lance.”

And how hard could that possibly be?