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The BEA Unit

Summary:

A xmas gift exchange for @JustJasper

A local BAU unit's longstanding rivalry with an unsub who just keeps getting away, comes to a halt when the FBI BAU unit is called in to help assist the investigation

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On the job you learn to live with a kind of preloaded reaction to things, like a level of anxious due to something that's not due for several hours from now, but which is the direct consequence of something you decided days ago. The timespan between lifting your queen piece and putting it down stretched out to days, months even! That's the kind of dread and tingling of the nerves Butters feels as they're driving up the free way, on their way to the next rendezvous point. Even knowing exactly what choices of their past led to this moment leaves with no comfort, if they could do it all again they would likely make all the same choices again. All they can do is pray there's some way to circumvent the next hour in their favour.

―So um... Is there any reason we're driving the complete opposite way from those FBI guys? The driver next to Butters whispers.

Oh Ell, they really wished they didn't need to drag their unit into this mess, but Ell especially. All the members of Butters squad brought unique skills to the table, Butters themselves was expert of picking out details in a crime scene that would reasonably go unnoticed by most people. Lousid was the king of stringing two abstract concepts or evidence together, you just feed enough details into his brain and some link will come out. Elizabeth is just great at a rugby tackle, she's also ginormus, the amount of unsub's who crack with just her looming overhead is ridiculous. Prince is back at base, their techie, infallible at extracting whatever records they need to. Ell's two things are emanating calming pheromones for the most high stress job imaginable and being able to drive. They all lied on their CV about having some ability to drive, somehow Ell has been the only one of them to stomach the horrors of Being In Car. Fae probably could've coasted through their rest of faer's career all nice and cush like with no trouble, Butters can't help but wrestle a prang of guilt.

After a pause, feeling the glares from everyone in the vehicle, they try to muster up something of an answer. Mercifully, Ell offers faer own hypothesis:
―Oooohhhh, are we "Going" to see our "Unsub" who we "Always try" to catch but they always "Manage" to "Get" away? Ell theorises.
Butters gives a small sigh of relief, all the wrong words were emphasized there, if they were bugged they probably couldn't make heads or tails of any of that.
―We'll meet up with them, it's just I had idea of an old friend who could help us out with finding our unsub. Replies Butters.
They brace a little, waiting for the reaction, not from Ell specifically but dunno... The universe? Reacting to speaking their intentions out loud. It feels like a declaration, slamming the clock down after putting down the queen piece. But the world continues it's mundanely as it is want too. Butters swallows this tension the best they can as the car continues down the road. Maybe as a sense of preparation, their mind goes back to how this day began:

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―So which one did you end up getting? Asks Elizabeth, in between bites of her instant noodles. The closeted gay, the closeted lesbian...?
―You could be talking about any of them dude, except for the divorced brothers. Replies Lousid. That's who I got.
―What where they like? Asks an inquisitive Ell.
―Well one of them Rossi is just like... A dad. Burgundy shirt, cologne, blasting out Return of the Mack motherfucker. The Lego man is Hotch, the one that looks like he cried to Adele in the car before he got here. It ended up being dead dry, how about you Elizabeth?
―The lesbians, both the one who owns a suit jacket: Prentiss and the one who doesn't JJ. I managed to divert the convo into queer shit as many times as humanly possibly without looking suss. They're not out yet so y'know, mums the word.
―Ooohhhhhhh nnoooo, were we supposed to be not telling them stuff? Ell asks. I told them stuff. Lotta stuff.
―Noooo, well the boss never said owt, but just in general I dunno if we're supposed to trust these guys yet? Elizabeth advises.
―But there here to help us with, y'know... Our unsub right? That's good innit? Lousid inquires.
―Our unsub The Boss doesn't seem to want us to catch. Elizabeth mumbles under her breath.
―God conspiracy theory Carol again. Lousid retorts, rolling his eyes.
―Uuhhhh we're literally investigators and you're giving me shit for putting two and two together like that? Aye, aye how our unit hath fallen. Elizabeth laments. Anyways Ell who did you get?
―I got the Husbands! Ell declares putting her hand in the air like it's class. Hair boy and not as much man. One of them does an impression of a tape recorder and the other can do a backflip! You're right Liz very suppressed goobers!
―I think fae means the diegetic memory dude and the buff dude. Elizabeth gestures towards Lousid.
―Eidetic memory. Lousid corrects.
―Yeah... What did I say? Elizabeth asks.
―Man is that what it's like at FBI level? Lousid continues, ignoring Elizabeth's question. You gotta be like a fizzed up bottle for 40 years before you can pop and kiss a boy? God forbid. Lousid laments.
―Alright settle down. Demands Butters, slamming down a pile of documents in front of Lousids desk. The BAU from the FBI are our guests and have offered to help us close our most infamous case, so I expect you all to speak nice of them no matter how sexually oppressed they all are, except for the tech lady who seems like she's doing fine.

Elizabeth and Ell lean out of their chairs to see the BAU gathered in the office space that was given to them for this case. Indeed their techie; Garcia was the odd one out of the bunch, looking like the only one of the calvary who could be a believable human being with thoughts, ideas and dreams. If she coughed right now, they would simply think nothing of it, normal thing, not a glitch in a constructed robot of a person i.e everyone else.

―Now if you got time to make little comments, then you got time to pack up your things. Butters . We're off to the crime scene we'll get a lowdown on the FBI's updated profile on our unsub there.
They look down at the floor and gives a contented sigh, as if delivering some bad news, even if said news isn't of a negative nature to anyone but themselves.
―I trust I don't need to tell who exactly we'll be chasing down today.

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Aaron Hotchner, the man you can put a Spirit Level Ruler onto the side of his head and the bubble would be perfectly in the middle, stands to address the crowd of local law enforcement with the local BAU standing at the front. Alongside him is Prentiss and Spencer, the aforementioned "Hair Boy" according to Ell. Behind them are photos of the victims arranged in relation to the killing pattern of the accused. Butters is familiar with the placement tactic here, well they don't know if other units go through the same through process they do, per say. But typically they try to build a form of solidarity with the officers, reminding them of the innocent lives being taken by the unsub. That tactic doesn't land for Butters too much here as the victims are a who-who's of politicians, CEOs and pundits whose individual reaches have made life hell for minority groups. Some are suspects in other cases or rapists and stalkers who for one reason or another could not be convicted.

And in the centre of it all, the one who all the arrows point to eventually, it's a blurred CCTV photograph and an unflattering police sketch but... It's zir. Butters can't even bring themselves to admit that they know zirs name, tho it intimately lingers in their head.

―I know many of you are familiar with the unsub of this case. Prentiss begins. But for the sake of additional information the FBI has uncovered to fit into the profile, let's start from the beginning and forget any preconceptions you had up till this point.
―We are dealing with a south asain-american woman. Hotch continues. She's in her early 30's. Previous profiles mistakenly identified this unsub as a man, so it's possible we're dealing with someone with a very masculine build or possibly a transgender man.
Butters nostrils flair and their breathing is becoming laboured, there's no way they figured all that out. They've been throwing them a bung profile for years. Hotch continues:
―Due to their fluid nature of their gender presentation, it is likely that she is going under a new name and alias. There have been multiple theories and suspicions but based on our research it's like that the name she is going under currently is...
No no no, they can't know that. At least they don't know that...
―...Is Chloe Kuppuswamy.
Butters grits their teeth and tries to suppress a pained expression. Fuck, Fuck! FUCK. How did they figure it all out? There and then a decision was made, the muscles in Butters face relax a little.
―Now this unsub started out as what we call an "Injustice Collector" Reid explains as he steps forward to take over the profile. These unsubs will kill any perceived wrong doing against them or a perceived breach of societal ethics with extreme violence. The first few victims line up with this profile, being those with a rap sheet of hate crime related violence. However now the unsub feels a duty to correct the wrongs of society, a target they feel will escape persecution of law enforcement. The victims slowly started escalated in their status, from pundits believed to be responsible for hate-motivated attacks on planned parenthood centres, with the latest victim being an elected official supporting a new abortion ban bill.
This is the kind of terminology that this local BAU has never come across before, Butters looks back to their team, only to be met with stares conveying one thing: Familiarity. They are not being spoken too, they are being spoken about, whether the FBI knows it or not. Elizabeth, Lousid and Ell all look back at Butters, it seems as if the same decision had been made.

Spencer continues and finishes the profile, and only one additional detail of the briefing catches everyone's attention from Hotch:
―Thanks to eyewitness testimony, we can track the unsubs location to around this circle here.
Butters looks over Hotch's shoulder and catches the witness in question, a merchant who runs a nearby cart who caught where their unsub went. She's a trans woman with dyed long black hair and white highlights, wearing a purple leather jacket and boots and a long black skirt. Butters looks at the woman with familiarity, but the look is not returned. After the brief is over, Butters immediately walks to their vehicle with their team and picks up the phone:
―Hey little goober, I'm gonna need eyes on the co-ordinates I just sent you, any CCTV or police radio you can get to tell me where those BAU Agen...
―Oh is that Prince!? Ell interrupts.
―Uhhh, yeah it is. An-
―Ask xir if I left my stress ball at xirs desk.
―Prince... Ell is a-
―Yeah yeah I can hear faer. Prince replies. Tell Ell fae also left faer emotional support bobble head on my desk too.
―Prince sa-
―Tell xir not to touch them!!! Ell retorts. Not till I get back.
―You got it boss. Prince replies, while putting the bobble head directly into xir mouth. But what did you need from me Butters?
―CCTV, Radio chatter, anything about our kitten at the co-ordinates I've sent.
―I just got them now, are these accurate boss? This doesn't fit with wha-
―I know, but these are the ones I'm asking for Prince. Don't let me down.
Butters hangs up as they arrive at the police car they all came in. However, instead of getting inside Butters turns to Ell:
―Remember a week ago I told you to uh, do something for me?
―I don't remember the last 10 seconds. Replies Ell.
Butters rolls their eyes, but trusts that their request was granted, as they head over to the building complex adjacent to where the scene of the crime was. There was what Butters was expecting, a much larger vehicle; a van. Which was resting in this place courtesy of Ell the week prior. They reach into Ell's coat pocket to procure the keys.
―Oh gosh! Who left those their? Asks Ell.
―You did, now I'm gonna need you to drive us somewhere in this. Butters asks.
―Uhhh boss, arn't they gonna notice that our car's just sitting there at the scene? Asks Elizabeth.
Butters gives a long sigh as they turn around.
―They knew zir name. Butters begins. That's something I didn't even tell you three, it's safe to assume they know a lot more then that.
The three officers look at each other in a bit of a stupor.
―Are you admitting...?
―I'm admitting that somethings about to go down and we're about to hit the point where plausible deniability comes to an end so, just saying if any one of you wants to keep your careers then you can part ways back to the car if you'd like. Proposes Butters, as they look towards the van unconvincingly. I mean how hard can driving be huh?
The three look at each other, not with surprise, they in the back of their mind suspected Butters might of been sabotaging their pursuit of this unsub, who they now know as Chloe. But as I said, these three had decided something much earlier.
―Honestly? I'm sick of knowing I'm making the world worse in this job, while this ragamuffin gets to do the work I joined this unit to do with abandon. We have to at best ruin the lives off and at worse: Kill so many innocents before we get to take down anyone actually evil and this bitch just gets to do it bi-weekly? Fuck that. Elizabeth admits. If you're in, then count me in too.
Lousid lets out a long ssiigghh.
―There goes my pension I guess. Lousid laments. But honestly if I had to do this job one more week I'd be reaching for the rope anyhows.
Ell looks around with confusion.
―Wait, is this our jobs!? Is this why money keeps going into my account? I was just following whatever you guys where doing! Ell admits.
Butters ruffles Ells hair with affection.
―That sounds like three yeses to me! Let's book it.

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Chloe stumbles into the room, zir chest covered in the dried blood of the man zie shot this morning. Grabbing onto zir holster, just barely concealed under the zir red open shirt covered in flower patterns, for dear life. Back against the wall, sweating, panting, hoping to god the stillness somehow helps zir recover zir stamina and heal zir wounds. The anxiety of this chase doesn't negate the relief zie has been feeling every since this morning, like a tight squeeze in their mind being released and a tension releasing. Permission almost, to stop the thoughts that keep zir up at night, the sleepless days of imaging all the victims of the anti-abortion policies, all the forced pregnancies. It's not like these problems have magically ended, but like zie had thought, it's like permission to quell these feelings of empathy. Zie had killed so many who were responsible for this legislative violence, surely zie had earned some respite, until the need arises again and it will arise again.

Chloe swings over and pulls zir pistol in reaction to hearing the door behind them open. In the door as they walk in, is a local police detective, much less of a threatening sight then the FBI agents that were chasing zir before. Even better, this was one zie recognised, the one that breaks the cycle of feeling guilt and release, feeling something else, anything else. But Chloe can't let zirself forget the context of what sh finds zirself in.

―So did they send you to make sure I come in quietly? Chloe asks.
Butters lowers their hands and casually walks into the room, but keeping a safe distance from the gun that was currently pointed towards them.
―Well, you know me by now right? Any chance I can get to come and see you Chloe. Butters replies with a warm smile.
Chloe chuckles, tho still keeping the pistol aimed at Butters.
―Please be straight with me Nutters. Is... My time up? Chloe asks.
―It doesn't have to be, you just need help, and we can give it to you.
―Oh yeah? By locking me up on my own?
―No, listen I don-
―You're so naive that you think they'll let me walk away from this, everything I've done? I should've known you were with them and not with me.
―Excuse me? After everything I've done for you? What I let you get away with?
―Whatever, what are you gonna do now? Now you wanna throw me under the bus so you can wash your hands of this I bet!

Butters mood takes a sudden shift for the aggressive as they storm towards Chloe, who is still pointing zir pistol at them. They grab the barrel and point it toward their head.
―Go on then, if you're the big man. Do it, pull the trigger. Do it. Shoot me. Go on then!? Fucking DO IT!
Chloe reacts with complete shock, eroding the last dam stopping zir from a complete breakdown. Zie starts to breathe erratically, tears fall down zir cheeks, as zir grip on the pistol begins to shake. Butters in turn grabs Chloe's hand on the holster and guides zir fingers to upll the trigger.

-*CLICK*-

Chloe breaks down in tears completely as Butters pulls the trigger again another five times.

-*CLICK, CLICK, CLICK, CLICK, CLICK*-

Chloe can't muster the strength to keep the pistol held up as zie collapses onto Butters chest and sobs uncontrollably.
―Or as I suspected, are you in way over your head and planned for suicide by cops tonight? Butters asks.
―I... I dunno... I. Chloe spurts in between tears. I don't fucking know any more, I just needed to feel less bad again, and now I'm here I'm just too far in, and I dunno what the fuck I'm doing, how I'm gonna save Soffie and Calcium I just don't know.

The flare of anger Butters felt towards having their actions and feelings invalidated, melts away seeing this. This was the vital point that decided who was walking out of this place.
―You're right you can't, not on your own. Butters continues. But like I said i'm here to HELP you. The problem is you've been shouldering this all on your own. You just can't, for anything not just these killings! You need help and we can help you and helping you doesn't mean you need to stop! But you have to LIVE for something else other then this. We both do... Least you get to put a bullet in actual fuckers, like what the fuck do I do, right? You shouldn't shoulder this on your own.
Chloe weeps for a little while longer before removing zirself from Butters chest, standing upright and tries to take in everything zie has heard.
―So what, have you quit being a cop or something?
―I mean... Doubtful they're gonna let us back in after this, I'd be genuinely shocked if they hadn't already sussed everything out.
―Your unit?
―All on board.
―I... Fuck off this is a trap right?
―I dunno what to tell you, do you have any better way out of this, to get out of this ALIVE, to LIVE, then my offer?
Chloe's shoulders relax, something inside zir just relaxes from all tension, zie just nods towards the ex-officer. Butters nods in return.
―Okay, just follow my lead on this. I have a plan.

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―Aaahh officer Reid, I was hoping your team would make it here soon. Butters explains, with a welcoming gesture.
―You were expecting us? Reid inquires. Why didn't contact us or call in for backup then?
Butters rubs the back of their head, as they turn their back to the FBI officer.
―Aaahhh, well. You know how it is with us local forces. We thought we didn't need it! We thought maybe we could nab zir ourselves. Down to our arrogance, I suppose. But I thought you'd figure out where we were eventually. Was counting on it.
―And I suppose you thought you'd get here early and warn the unsub beforehand?
Butters turns around to see the FBI Agent with his pistol drawn and aimed squarely at them.
―Heh, and how long have you known? Butters asks.
―Oh we always had our suspicions our unsub had help from a local officer. Reid explains. The killer, their work was too sloppy, normally killings like this would leave a substantial amount of evidence behind. The only way they could've gotten this lucky is if someone was intentionally misleading the investigation. Oh and speaking off, we didn't mention any specific use of pronouns in our profile, nor did we find any in your case files, so how did you know they go by those neopronouns? Unless you've been in contact with the unsub this entire time?
Butters shrugs at this explanation.
―Leave it to a cop to threaten to arrest someone over gendering someone correctly.
―If you just tell us where Chloe is, then I promise a reduced sentence for you and the rest of your team will just face suspension.
―And Chloe?
―Well, it shouldn't matter to you, Chloe's a serial killer. Catching them is what we do.
―Catching people like zir IS what we do, I'd rather be catching people like the one's zie's been killing if I'm honest.
―That's not what we do, we catch these people, and it's the court's job to deliver justice it's out of our hands.

Butters then performatively, starts kicking the floor, before addressing the agent again.
―How long have you been at this job?
―If it's 2009 now, tthheeennn... Six? Six years now.
―Okay so I know you're not a rookie so what is this? Bright eye'd idealism that we do any good in this job? Cynicism of earning the pay cheque? Cos I know what we do, what we do is give the world a scapegoat. I know I have to profile people who I have more in common than I do any of these suits, "The good ones" or whatever, as Monsters. I call people "Personality Disordered" like it's a slur, I help other police departments murder autistic people in cold blood with fucking Glee. Meanwhile, actual fucking psychopaths are "Sir" or "Mr. Ceo" the actual sickos who push people to the point of desperation, who we get brought in to kill like being asked to wipe a stain. And you say we get the bad guys, how many cases is that actually tho? One for every forty nine cases of making sure a homeless minority gets the injection, we do not help, we swing around death like a rod to the child. You're gonna arrest me? Shoot me? For just doing the same shit we got paid to all this time? Why? Cos you don't like that the people Chloe did it do look like you, Spencer? Actually nawh I take that back, we're the same so it's even more fucked up.
―I am Nothing like you. Spencer replies, gritting his teeth at the implication.
―Yeah, that's exactly what you'd think. Which was it? Did mummy and daddy pay off the doctors to snub your autism diagnosis? Or perhaps not, and you know, but that's why you're on that side of the room, it lets you keep thinking you're different from us, one of the "Good ones" that you're okay that should be enough time.
Reid jolts his body, trying to react to Butters' signal, but it's too late as he feels a crack on the back of his head courtesy of Elizabeth, who in the screaming match had managed to sneak behind the agent. He falls to the ground, just barely holding onto consciousness, his pistol flying just to the side of where he falls. Elizabeth manages to catch it underneath her boot, she goes to pick it up and slugs two shots into the agent's leg, before opening the chamber and emptying the bullets from the gun, before throwing it across the room. Both officers confirm their respective passageways are clear before heading out together towards the exit.
―Hey boss.... Did you mean any of that stuff you were saying back there? Elizabeth inquires.
―Well... It had to have come from somewhere. Butters replies, shrugging. Filling the paperwork gives you a lot of time to contemplate.
―huh, here I thought you were just doing it for the pussy.

Both officers pack away their weapons and get ready to head out of the door.
―I'm pissed off that worked tho, somehow. Butters comments.
―Huh?
―Like this prick would think I wouldn't know not to use zir real pronouns around him. I know it was the plan but also, just annoyed it worked. Them FBI guys think we're all stupid cunts, don't they ey?
―I mean considering how long you were able to run this racket with our force like...is he wrong tho?
Butters pauses for a bit and nods to themselves, before exiting the hallway with Elizabeth.

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―So you want the good news or the bad news, Elizabeth?
―Oh god, go on bad news first. Elizabeth replies, as they both run down the corridors.
―Well running my profile on Spencer Reid the only reason why he let me go on my rant was because his goal was to stall for time, that's the only reason why our set up plan worked. He had unwavering confidence someone else was going to flank us both during the encounter.
―Oh god is the entire FBI BAU team in here with us?
―That'd be a naive stratagem on their part. Not only are Ell and Lousid still outside and need to be kept an eye on, I'm doubtful Chloe is the only one in here, in fact I saw Soffie the little cart shop one, try and misdirect the BAU earlier.
―Oh I reckon the femboy one, like the tall one is in here too: Calcium.
―Ergo if we found Chloe on zir own, that means they're all split up. Leading me to belive he only had one confidant in mind coming our way... Which brings us to the bad news: There was only one BAU agent Reid would have that kind of rapport with, the one he kept glancing over like a sexually repressed puppy.
―Oh god, it's baldy, isn't it?
Elizabeth sighs to herself, she knows, despite being the bruiser of her unit, this dude was very obviously on another level. Butters had briefed her on his profile in the car, noticing based on how he keeps his weight off painful joints as he stands, as well as some of the bruises on his forearms. The man dives, and he dives a lot, and he is fucking good at it. As immensely strong as she is, once this dude has got one of them on lock, it's doubtful they are getting out.
―But the good news. Butters continues in a slightly hushed tone, as they begin to slow down from running just outside of another doorway. The good news is that I thought about all of this while eating my cereal. Just follow my lead and it'll go all according to plan. Keep your distance, tackle distance at all times. He closes that gap, back up. I'll keep him talking.

Elizabeth nods as Butters turns the handle on the door and puts on their best impression of "Oh gosh! Fancy meeting you here, I'm so surprised!" at the sight of BAU agent Derek Morgan pinning down a handcuffed gangly man. Butters recognized this as Chloe's number 2: Calcium. The agent stands up, un-holstering his pistol, and aims it at the two women, who instinctively hold their hands in the air. He then addresses the pair.
―Okay easy everyone, there's no reason why everyone can't walk out of this unscathed. We already got one member of Chloe's crew down, and it's just going to be a matter of time until we get them and their informant.

Butters thinks to themselves, well... Informant I feel like is giving her too much credit, she just kinda points left when they go right. There's not really a word for that, evidenced by Morgan's pause before saying the word.... You know what, this isn't the time! It's hard to turn Behaviour Analysis brain off even in times like this! But let's be productive, he says they've almost got them, if this were local beat cops there might be some truth to a dead or alive approach of flooding the place with officers. But they've run the profile, despite the BAU's overwhelming kill count, the biggest passing of the buck is that "It was the local cops who take the shots" and okay... Discussion of taking culpability aside, Butters believes there is some truth in this. This unit doesn't come here for the massacre, so they send in this small team to try and take the unsub out alive. Whether it's altruistic or it keeps them morally above cops in their personal logical backflipping, it doesn't matter, it just appeals to his universal truth.

But stick with us on this line of thinking, the BAU also couldn't let it slip they knew that Butters unit was collaborating with Chloe, this means they didn't outsource any extra FBI agents alongside them to tail them 1:1, they had to keep the appearance of... Well, WE were the outside help they were collaborating with. Which means there is 7 of them vs. 8 of us and considering the two of each side that are occupied with each other outside the warehouse and that Reid is down, they mathematically cannot have everyone covered with just 3 of them.

He's lying. It is nowhere near a "Matter of time". He keeps speaking about the resources and the snipers and the officers outside, numbers numbers numbers, they have the big number, and we have the tiny small number: So we should give up. Even though these numbers do not pertain in any meaningful way to the actual situation they find themselves in. It's smoke and mirrors, he's counting on us wanting to cash in some kind of payout from all of this: Our lives.

―Spoken like someone's who never had to endure a prison sentence, you think that's anything resembling living a life? It'd be a pain in arse to even kill myself in there. Calcium protests.
―Alive has got to be better then dead right? And I know you arn't doing this to be the bad guys, you've dedicated your whole lives to your work, just like we have. But if we let play judge, jury and executioner it's just gonna lead to a lot of dead bodies.
―We do a hell of a better job of getting bad guys then you do! Calcium shouts.
―It's not our job man, that's for the courts and justice system to decide. Morgan replies. We just get the bad guys, it's what we do.

Morgan slowly approaches Butters and Elizabeth as he continues this back and forth with Calcium. The pair slowly match his pace in circling around the room, making sure to maintain their distance. Just as their backs are about to hit the wall Butters, actually voluntarily stops backing up and addresses Morgan themselves.

―You know, -chk chk chk-. Butters begins, making a clacking noise from the corner of their mouth. It's kind of adorable how much you two are a like Agent Morgan.
―Just like who? Morgan asks.
―Well not identical by any means, but you got a ying and yang thing going on here. See Agent Reid's downfall was letting me talk for too long. Now here you are with the exact opposite, complimenting folly.

Before Morgan has any time to react to this information, as he tries to swing behind him, a leather shoe comes careening into his face via a roundhouse kick, knocking him to the floor. Butters and Elizabeth act fast, with Elizabeth stomping with her entire weight onto Morgan's wrist, releasing the pistol from his grip. Butters picks it up and once again, empties two bullets into each of his legs and dismantles the magazine, throwing the gun across the room. Elizabeth then leers of his face:
―When you wake up, for the love of god just ask him out.
Before stamping on his face with her foot, knocking the agent out unconscious. Butters then finds the cuff keys on the agent's person and unlocks Calcium’s restraints.

―Not usually the context I like to be found in cuffs. Calcium comments.
―Yeah yeah, something something, take me out to dinner first, something something, you suck dick, we get it! Chloe stammers. Let's just get the fuck out of here! Soffie's in the next room let's collect her and go!
―Wait! Butters interrupts. We got a van that can fit all of us in, please come with us I factor you three in our escape plan.
Chloe has a minute of hesitation of trusting Butters so intimately all of a sudden, but looks over to zir comrade who shoots zir a look of well... A look that says "What other choice do we have?" Zie nods and everyone in the room heads out of the door.

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All 7 of them: Butters, Chloe, Ell, Lousid, Soffie, Elizabeth and Calcium, manage to make their way to the now getaway van. A third vehicle that Butters had made sure to set up in advance, the idea being the FBI would assume the switch in vehicles would imply the van they came here in would be the getaway van, not this one. Butters pulls another key for this van from Ell's pockets.
―You should go into magician work, where do you keep making these keys appear from!? Ell asks.
Butters throws the keys back to Ell as fae starts the van up. Butters looks over to see Chloe embrace the exasperated looking Soffie.
―i'm so sorry my misdirecting did nothing, they didn't belive me. I barely avoided getting arrested. Soffie lamments.
―Hey, I asked you to point left when we went right and that's exactly what you did! Chloe reassures her.
Zie them leads them both into the van, followed by Elizabeth and Lousid.

Butters then gets into the front seat and goes to close the door before Chloe stops them.
―Uuhhhh what you doing? Asks Chloe.
―Sitting at the front because I'm the lead? Explains Butters.
―No no no i'm the lead of this operation. Chloe explains.
Butters leans back and pats the base of their lap.
―Well it can be both of us then, there's plenty of room here. Butters explains, grinning ear to ear.
Chloe can't help but smirk in-between blushing, zir did think about for a second.
―On second thought I'll take my chances in the back. Chloe relents.
Butters makes sure to give Prince a quick call, where xie quickly informs them that the FBI have found their downed agents and are coming at them with everything they have. Mass street shut downs and the like. Xie gives them the best route xie thinks will give them all the best chance of escape. Butters thanks Prince, it's all xir could've done for them, now it's up to them. Butters glances at the back of their vehicle with all their old friends, their new comrades, I guess what is now their family in this uncertain chapter of their life. Eventually they'll have to pick up Prince too of course, but this is the last stretch. Butters gives a long sigh and looks to Ell who is beginning to back out of their hiding spot and on to the main roads.
―This was all a good idea wasn't it? Asks Butters.
―No, absolutely not. Ell replies. But we would've wound up here no matter what universe we're in I reckon!
Ell kind of shrugs and then gets back to driving. Butters decides it's probably for the best to subscribe to that kind of thinking. They close their eyes, they played their hand and now it's just time to see if the bet plays out.