Work Text:
It was a week before Christmas so every shop and business was decorated to a T with reindeer, Saint Nick, The baby himself and of course angels. Damn angels.
Crowley thought he would be able to pick up a few gifts for Nina and Maggie maybe even the ex arch ass and his little Ray of sunshine, all the happy couples for the holidays with their matching jumpers and gingerbread houses and movie marathons. He wasn’t salty.
He just needed a nap. Until the new year, after the whole kissing on new year stuff and the going into the new year with so and so posts on social medias. Ok he was a little salty.
But you spend all eternity with someone and they leave in just a couple hours notice.
Crowly hucked his hell paid for gifts into the back of the bently, he would put them in the front but something about the Santa with rosy cheeks and piercing blue eyes was just a little too off putting to drive next to.
He flicked on the radio and Thank God it’s christmas blared through on the time stamp 1:16
My friend, the world
Will share this special night
Crowley leaned back into the driver seat and groaned
Because it’s Christmas
He reached for the volume button when a shadow approached the window a tapped and in sync the song and Crowley both exclaimed.
“GOD”
Thank God it’s Christmas
for one night
The figure at the window backed away now with the view of a face. Muriel. In the most colorful outfit Crowley had seen on them. Brown. A brown Christmas sweater with a reindeer leaping for joy with some kinda of cheesy text bubble.
Crowley successfully turned off the radio this time and rolled down the window to hear what they had to say.
“Hello, yes hi.”
“Hi?”
They held out their hands for a moment then reached into a bag pulling out a packaged fruit cake. Sometimes you forget these things don’t just exist in hallmark movies but people actually spend time and money making them.
“Nina helped me.”
“Of course she did.”
Muriel gave the bag a little shake before tossing it through the window. Hitting Crowley in the forehead before landing in his lap.
“She said I added too much flour but it looked like snow in Christmas cards in the cafe so I thought it would make them more Christmas-ish”
“Mhm.”
It fell apart just existing. Crowley shoved it into the glove box next to the extra pairs of glasses. “Is that all?”
Muriel didn’t say anything.
“Well?”
“Oh” they said as if just remembering, but maybe they were. “Nina is spending Christmas with Maggie um, somewhere they didn’t tell me.”
Crowley didn’t say anything he just wanted to the story to be over and done with.
“And Nina said that”
They hesitated.
“What?”
“Nina and Maggie said that you have to let me spend Christmas with you until they get back after new years.”
Under his glasses crowley's eye twitched.
“What?”
“Well Maggie and Nina-
Crowley dissociated as they continued the same story again.
“And I can’t go back to heaven because of.”
Crowley cut them off
“I don’t want to hear it just get in.”
The bentley doors passenger seat opened, now weather Crowley miracled it or the bentley learned to do that on its own is up for interpretation.
Muriel quickly ran over to the other side and shuffled into the bentley. “Thank you.”
“Sssssshut up.”
***
When they got to the flat Muriel was shocked to see no lights around the many plants Crowley had. One could easily be dressed up just like any Christmas tree so popularity used.
Crowley tossed down the gifts by the door and sank into his chair by the tv while Christmas marker people a little too convincingly talked about how a vacuum cleaner that would choke after a single hairball that cost 500 quid was worth it.
Muriel sat Chris crossed on the sofa and played with an array of pine cones in a tray and the new item for show were fake Christmas trees that you would be paying off for the next twelve years but would break after three.
Muriel sat up.
“Why don’t you have a Christmas tree? You like plants!”
Crowley grunted as a response.
Muriel turned back to the tv where the lights sparkled across the screen. Not compelled by this response.
“Your like the grinch y'know?”
Crowley almost sat up.
“How do you know about that?”
Muriel shrugged.
“Book.”
“Movie.” Argued Crowley
“Book.”
“Movie.”
Muriel miracled a copy of the book in hands painting to the title and then the authors name. “Dr Seuss!”
“Why is he a doctor if he’s an author?”
“I dunno!”
Crowley picked up the book and tossed it over his shoulder that crashed somewhere else.
“How about this. You watch the grinch movie.”
Muriel hesitated. “Okay?”
“The 2000 one with Jim Carrey not the musical with Mathew Morrison.”
Muriel nodded questionably. And Crowley made his final point. “And we can have a Christmas tree.”
Muriel jumped up. “I’ll get the popcorn ready!”
Crowley smiled. “Did Nina teach you how not to burn it?”
Muriel already down the hallway yelled out “she tried!”
When crowley was sure they were occupied he snapped down and pulled up a Christmas tree that perfectly fit the flat.
Then he went over to the Mona Lisa sketch and from behind it pulled out a box of decoration over the years. The one up top was a homemade ornament with a photo of Crowley at the magic show with Aziraphale. Every year he kept it at the top of the box so it wouldn’t be scratched.
But as he heard Muriel coming down the hall he shoved it to the bottom covering it in tinsel.
“It’s a little burned at the bottom but I think this is the best I’ve done!”
Crowley turned around with the box. “Good job.”
He traded Muriel’s popcorn and gave them the box of decorations.
“Really?” They beamed.
“In the other room.”
Muriel squealed and took down the hallway.
Crowley walked over to the sketch once more and took out another box. Only this box was more carefully wrapped with bubble wrap and cloth.
He walked over with the box and sat down next to an accent table and gently began setting up the scene.
Two pairs of potted palm plants bent their branches just like they did the same scene so many years ago.
He adjusted the sheep, the wisemen, the parents and of course the babe.
“Happy birthday big guy.”
He looked down at the box one last time with two figures still in the box. One that came with the set and another custom made. Wings from both figures. One white one black. He kept those in the box.
Putting them in the drawer of the accent table.
***
Eventually Christmas Eve rolled around. And the emotions flooded Crowley and he was desperate to feel them in his own ways. He found a church event for Muriel to attend for the day. One with lights.
“Are you sure you don’t want to go?”
“Cant.”
“It’s not in a church it’ll be at a park.”
“Better safe than sorry.”
Muriel’s shoulders sank.
Crowley rolled his eyes and went over to the Christmas tree and pulled out a gift. And tossed it to them.
“Here early Christmas gift.”
They eagerly unwrapped it and pulled out a camera.
“You can take some photos and video for me.”
They marbled at all of the buttons and mechanics.
“It should be all set up, watched a tutorial.”
Before Crowley could get another word out Muriel hugged him like a boa constrictor. Maybe spending too much time with him have them some kinda crazy snake abilities.
“Ok ok, now go I wanna see what photos you bring back, you don’t wanna miss something you can take a photo of.”
They were too excited to speak so they feverishly nodded and headed out the flat.
Crowley's smile slowly faded as Muriel’s presence left.
He walked over to the Christmas tree to really analyze how Muriel decorated. There was no color scheme or theme. Just the most random collection of things.
His eye then caught the ornament he thought he so carefully hid in the box, overlooking the entire flat right next to the star. He didn’t even think Muriel could reach that high until he found a feather fallen astray near the trunk of the tree.
***
When Muriel returned Crowley was half asleep on the couch when the sound of the front door closing woke him. “Oh hey how wassit?”
“Oh wonderful! I really think it would have been alright for you to be there all we did was talk about holiday traditions.”
He shrugged “oh well, maybe next year.” Muriel liked the idea of Christmas with Crowley next year.
“Oh I took some photos for you!”
When Muriel handed Crowley the camera he half expected all the photos to be blurry but most of them were pretty decent.
Photos of lights and cookies passed by as the button was held down. Muriel paused as a photo of a cookie Santa showed up.
“Crowley?”
“Mhm?”
“Who, or what is Santa?”
Crowley zoomed in on the photo.
“Just a tradition for kids I guess?”
“So he’s not real?”
Crowley chuckled.
“Nah, don’t worry no old man is going to break into the flat tonight.”
When Crowley noticed Muriel’s somewhat disappointed but not all surprised look he opened up his blanket for them to join. “We still have gifts for each other if that’s what your worried about.”
“Wasn't worried about anything but you.” They smiled.
Muriel’s eyes drifted to the tree again.
“Those are new.” They looked at two new decorations on the tree.”
Crowley looked over.
“Oh yeah, made those while you were gone.”
On the tree side by side were two feathers, one white, one black swaying side by side.
“I like them.” Muriel said drowsy. “I think I’m going to try sleeping now.”
Crowley huffed a laugh. “Ok lemme know if you forget how.”
Muriel had been taking naps for the first time with Crowley; they liked how peaceful it felt, and how they didn’t have to work too hard to do it.
Eventually they both fell asleep their wings adding as a blanket for the both of them.
***
Crowley was woken by Muriel shaking him. “Crowley, look!”
As he rubbed the sleep from his eyes the light of the tree blinded him.
When he fully got up he tripped over a gift he was sure had not been there before.
From Santa
To Crowley
“Huh?” Crowley said aloud.
“I know!” Muriel said. “We both got one!”
Crowley was a little taken a back. Had an old man had broken into the flat.
Muriel sat next to him on the floor putting their gifts side by side. “Should we open them first or last?”
“Erm.” Crowley said half consciously already opening the gift.
A first press vinyl of queen.
Muriel started opening their gift, careful not to ruin the pretty wrapping paper. As Crowley inspected the vinyl from all angles.
It was in as good condition as something this old and wanted could be.
Muriel pulled out a little penguin stuffed animal that came with 3 little hats for it.
Which they immediately started to dress.
“I thought you said Santa was just a tradition for kids.”
Crowley looked around the flat to see another feather caught in one of the potted palm trees. And then he noticed the figures he had originally tucked into the desk.
Displayed with the rest of the nativity. Side by side.