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Tali and Jondum watched with stunned amazement at the Speedwell’s newest - temporary - addition to the crew mess table.
Shepard had set it up in the night. She left it out to sit and to be enjoyed. The two teammates had found the wonder as they emerged from their quarters, mesmerized by the lights shimmered and slowly changed colors. Green gave way to red which led to blue, shifting between all kinds of colors before repeating the process.
It was adorned with trinkets and baubles, wrapped with shiny filaments on a string. The smallish thing captivated the two crew; neither was familiar with the decoration or why Shepard had put it out.
“What is it?” Tali asked, memorized by the lights as she tapped a decoration with her middle finger, making the object rock back and forth. She pulled her hand away worried it would break.
“It’s a Christmas Tree,” Liara answered from behind her Omni-tool. "It is put up during a specific human holiday, Christmas - hence the name Christmas Tree.” Liara split her attention between the salarian and the quarian as they both gazed at the brilliant half-meter-tall plastic tree. Then back to her Omni to browse the Citadels shops looking for the right gift.
“And all humans put up this tree and make it look pretty for the holiday?” Tali asked, keenly intrigued by the tradition.
“Many, but not all. There is a signifigant religious component to the holiday. However, some celebrate because of the joyous festive nature of the holiday. Others use it to exchange gifts and well-wishes.” Liara explained then returned to her Omni and continued her shopping.
“You sure know a great deal about human traditions,” Tali said with a provocative cock of her brow insinuating the interest Liara had for a certain human and what Tali thought - or maybe what she hoped - was going on between the asari and human.
“Your point being? I took some time to learn about our new allies when they became one of the council client races.” Liara's explanation was only a partial truth. She had intentionally left out the part about spending two years circling Earth during the Sol Observation Expedition. And also the extra research she did when she met Shepard. And , that she happened to be browsing all over the extranet for some kind of gift idea to give Shepard.
The search for a gift was proving to be most frustrating for the asari. Liara couldn't find the right gift. Something personal but not overly so, they just told each other they had feelings for one another, so it couldn't be anything too personal. But something impersonal wouldn't work either.
Life would be so much easier if the search function had a ‘more than friends, but not quite lovers’ filter.
The forward door slid open with a casual-looking Shepard strolled in; her hands stuffed in her pockets. “Like the tree, guys?”
“Yes, Shepard. It is a very lovely tree.” Jondum said as he sat at the end of the table watching the lights slowly transition.
“You don't strike me as the religious type, Shepard,” Tali said while endlessly poking at the various dangling ornaments.
Shepard rubbed the back of her neck looking away from the group gathered in the mess. “Eh, I’m kinda not. I just like what the holiday represents. The festivities, joy, and the rest, ya know?”
Tali pushed herself away from the table and her newfound fascination with the Christmas tree. "What was it like growing up?! What did your family do to celebrate?!" The quarian was enthusiastically curious and unaware, she didn't know Shepard's past the way Liara did - and even she knew very little.
Liara observed from her seat, the way stuffed her hands in her pocket and watched the lights of the tree. She would smile but it was small and sad.
“Anyway, I need to have a chat with the Shadow Council about any leads on whatever the turians are up to; or that Kelham-Talib issue. Enjoy the tree folks.” Shepard gave them a parting wave and left from where she came.
Liara stirred and shimmied her way out from behind the table to follow. She had some degree of emotional investment in the woman now and was not content with letting Shepard walk away carrying whatever burden she held on to. She needed to ensure that her very close friend but not quite girlfriend yet, wasn't unhappy.
She made her way the short distance to the comms room, quietly moving toward the door in case Shepard was talking with the Council, so as not to disrupt the conversation. Liara stuck her head into the small compartment to peek, but no Shepard, no Council. The room was dark.
Liara leaned out and looked forward to the cockpit just ahead, also empty. That left only Shepard’s quarters. She tested the waters of the growing relationship by inviting herself into Shepard’s room. No knock or preamble to enter, just a tap on the interface to open the door.
A quick look around to make sure none of the other crew were in earshot before Liara quietly called out to Shepard. “Allie, are you in here?” Liara walked into the room, closing the door behind her.
“Over here.” Shepard’s voice whispered back. She sat at the edge of her bed, up the small set of stairs to the small loft.
Liara moved up the few steps and walked up to where Shepard sat. Her hands were folded into themselves, resting her elbows on her thighs. The lights around the bedding were dimmed. She gave Liara a half smile as she looked up at the asari standing over her. “Hey. Come to check up on me?”
“I was worried,” Liara admitted, trying not to come off as desperate or overly possessive. A sentiment that was getting difficult to overcome, being possessive. Shepard was amazing and Liara had no doubt that she’d have to fend off rivals from the human she was trying to claim. “You just looked sad when you left the mess hall. I thought your tree would make you happy.”
“Oh no, I am - I am! The way Tali stares at it, awestruck - even Bau - reminds me of growing up, doing the same thing.” She closed her eyes and breathed deeply through her nose. “Looking up at the tree the orphanage put up for us. It wasn't much compared to what every other kid had. You know, the ones with families.”
Liara’s heart broke for the once small Shepard. She knew of the holiday from her research and knew it was important for so many humans, but nothing in her study of humanity touched on those who had lived with nothing.
“A couple times some gifts would be donated and I'd get one. It didn't matter what, just getting one was the best.” A wistful smile grew on Shepard’s lips. “I still remember my first Christmas present. A simple doll with brown hair. Gosh, I held onto that toy for as long as I could! When you don't have much, you hold onto whatever you can.”
Liara slowly sat down at the edge of the bed next to Shepard while she reminisced about years past. “When I got older, more bitter and rebellious, I gave the doll to one of the little girls new to the orphanage; she was so happy.” Shepard opened her eyes and stared blankly at the wall in front of her. “I didn't really celebrate the holidays with anyone till I joined the Marines, and even then it mostly involved drinking for fun, and then drinking away the memories.”
She sneered a bit, “The only other person I tried to celebrate with was my ex… and look how that turned out.”
Liara reached down, taking Shepard’s hand in hers. “Don't let someone like that stain your memories.” She pleaded to Shepard, trying to salvage the woman’s past and trying to push Shepard past her past love because again, Liara was becoming possessive and she knew it. “Allie, you find the silver lining in life, don't let one person change that. I know your life was hard growing up. I can only imagine what it must have been like having never dealt with it myself.”
Liara shifted, turning to face Shepard, resting a bent knee on the bed. She cupped both of the woman’s hands in hers, pulling them up to her chest, but not against it; Liara wasn't that bold yet. “You are a good person, Allie! Life gave you a rough start but you made the best of it. Or we wouldn't be here now. And- I’d like to think as time goes on, we can do this more, and create new memories, better ones!”
Liara held on firmly to Shepard’s hands, feeling their warmth against the soft scales in the palms of her hands.
The cabin may have been dim, but Liara could see the fierce red hue of Shepard’s blushing and at a bit of a loss for words. Liara delicately leaned in closer. She kept her eye locked in Shepard’s green shimmering orbs.
“Thanks, Liara. That means a lot coming from you.” Shepard fidgeted her fingers in Liara’s hold, leaning a bit away, sucking the wind out of Liara’s sails. Liara swore at herself for moving too fast again and pushing Shepard out of her comfort zone. But the sting of the moment was soothed by a glad smile on the human’s face. “I’d like to think we'll share more holidays like this too.”
Liara couldn't find it in herself to wallow in pity. Shepard was still there, they were still sitting on her bed, sharing the moment, a new memory. “Well, I'm trying to. I've been attempting to find a gift for you, but not having much luck. Most of the stuff is too big or cumbersome to fit on a ship this size, or too boring, or too… personal. What would you want?”
Shepard just smiled and shook her head, “You don't have to get me stuff, Liara. It's not about getting-”
“But I want to!” Liara quickly cut in. It was a human holiday that she was already familiar with, but before now that's all it was, just a knowledge that Christmas existed. Now she wanted to celebrate it because of this amazing woman!
Fantasies had drifted through Liara’s daydreams when she was gift shopping. A day off in the distance when Shepard and she would return to Earth for a week at Christmas time. To a cabin at the high Earth latitudes where snow would cover the land as far as the eye could see. Snuggle on the worn couch by a stone fireplace. They would exchange small gifts - mementos of love and devotion. A fresh-hewn tree from the forest to decorate; the smell of pine and the fireplace lingering in the cabin. Making love in the fire’s dancing light.
The first few years they would come just the two of them; maybe her parents would come for the experience. Then years later they would bring their children. It would become a tradition. "It will be perfect", Liara thought with a wistful sigh.
Maybe she had been borrowing too many of Tali’s trash romance stories.
“And I appreciate the thought; that is what matters most. You don't have to give me presents, the fact that you would go to all that trouble for me means a lot, Liara.” Shepard turned the tables, clasping her hands over Liara’s.
“I still want to try,” Liara grumbled with a pout, looking away to hide the look of displeasure.
The edge of the bed creaked and shifted, “Tis better to give than receive.” Shepard whispered softly.
“It is kinda hard to ‘give’ if you won't let me get you any-” Liara’s objection was stayed by the press of warm soft lips against her own.
Liara sucked in a gasping breath through the nose, it happened, Shepard finally made a move. It was only a kiss, but it meant the world to Liara.
They held for a moment, the first connection, the gentle pop of lips separating. Half-hooded eyes of adoring affection kept operating into the depths of Liara’s soul.
“Merry Christmas, Liara.”
She chuckled to herself, running her finger across Shepard’s brow and pushing back the hanging loose strands of red hair. Her fantasies were still a ways off, but they got a bit closer.
“Merry Christmas, Allie,” Liara whispered back and leaned in to steal one last Christmas present.