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Loki Laufeyson hadn’t expected to be spending his Christmas Eve like this, walking along an empty street by himself. Usually, he would be in Norway with his family right now, but this year he had decided to stay behind in New York to be with his girlfriend…ex-girlfriend? He wasn’t sure anymore.
Sylvie had gotten so angry at him, and of course Loki’s pride wouldn’t let him just give in and accept that she was right. The fight had been so stupid too, in hindsight.
“Do you think you could help clean?” Sylvie had asked him what had probably only been a few days ago, yet it felt like months, “It’s a bit annoying that I have to do all the cleaning in both your apartment and mine. Even when I’m not the one making the mess.”
“I can see if I have time,” he had muttered, still focused on his work despite the late hour, “But you know I’m busy.”
The irritation was obvious in her voice, “Yeah, I am too. I work all day too. You know your father isn’t going to make you CEO over your brother when he retires just because you work more hours.”
“I don’t recall asking for your opinion on the matter,” Loki had snapped before he thought about what he had said, but she had struck a nerve. And she knew it, “I’m sorry that I’m more dedicated to my job than you are, but I have to meet my deadlines.”
The fight had only exploded from there, ending with Sylvie screaming at him to get out of her apartment and to not bother coming back. He had tried texting and calling her countless times since, but hadn’t heard anything back.
So now he was walking alone in the cold, wondering how he could be so idiotic. All she had asked was for help, help cleaning his home and messes that he helped make. Why had he fought her on that? Growing up, he had always helped his mother clean, it wasn’t that he didn’t know how or had some belief that he was above doing so.
He had just been angry at work, busy beyond belief, and now he had lost the best thing in his life because of it. Just one more thing that his father had somehow managed to take from him, in a way. If he wouldn’t have assigned so much work over the holidays, perhaps this could’ve been avoided.
Shivering, Loki pulled out his phone to check the weather and saw that snow was supposed to start falling at any second. He texted Sylvie, hoping that maybe she would answer but knowing it was less than likely.
Continuing walking, Loki realized he wasn’t sure exactly where he was going. He didn’t want to go home, he didn’t want to be in his apartment and face the realization that he was truly spending Christmas Eve by himself, that even Christmas Day wouldn’t bring about family or friends to spend time with.
Sylvie was the only one still in the city. They had planned to stay at her apartment for Christmas, to stay up watching Christmas movies, bake cookies, drink eggnog…things that didn’t seem right to do on your own. He didn’t even have a Christmas tree up, no, they had only bothered to decorate Sylvie’s place since they would be there.
It wouldn’t feel like Christmas if he went home, not that it did out here anyways. It was chilly, soon to snow, and he knew if he looked he could find decorations shining brightly - but it didn’t matter. It just didn’t feel like Christmas at all. Maybe it could help, maybe he could find some hope in the bright lights that he was usually so fond of.
Up ahead he noticed a bunch of shops, closed but their holiday decorations lit up. Loki smiled seeing the lights, remembering how as a child his mother would make the entire family (his father was the only one that had to be forced, really) go out to see the lights. They were happy memories, and some of the only ones Loki could remember where his father wasn’t angry at something.
Not too far up the street he found a path of lights - something that had been set up for pedestrians to walk through and see a bunch of different light displays. As he walked through it, the happy memories of his family began to fade into ones of Sylvie, bringing his mood down once again as he thought of her and what she might be doing.
She brings out the light in me, he thought as he stopped to stare at one display that seemed to mimic fireworks, She sparks fireworks I’ve never felt before. And I’ll never feel that with another person. She’s my soulmate, and I’ve gone and messed it up. Her life will be bright and full no matter what, she’ll make sure of it, but mine will forever be dull without her.
Sylvie always had a way of lighting up a room. Considering everything she had been through, Loki had always thought it was astounding how she could lift anybody’s mood. She had lost her entire family, practically raised herself, put herself through university…but she never let any of that burn the fire within her out. If anything, it fanned the flames to grow even higher, to become stronger.
Sylvie was his sun, his moon, and all the stars. When his embers were starting to die out, when he felt like he was losing his mind, Sylvie had always been there to catch him. And he tried to be there for her, he really did.
And it was one simple task that she had asked of him that he had decided to make a big deal of, and ruined it all.
Before he knew it, Loki found himself walking towards her apartment. She might slam the door in his face - if she even opened it - but he needed to see her. He needed to hear that it was really over, if it was.
The seconds after knocking on her door felt like hours, and he began to wonder if this was the right move. What if she wasn’t home, or what if she had someone else over? She probably didn’t even want to-
“Loki?” Sylvie asked, opening her door slightly. He couldn’t fully see her face, but it almost sounded like she’d been crying, “What’re you doing here?”
“You didn’t answer your phone,” he said lamely, “I just…I needed to apologize. For everything. For not always being there, for being so wrapped up in my work, for saying the things I did that night…I’m so sorry. I understand you probably don’t want to hear from me, but I just needed you to know that. And I love you. I love you, Sylvie, and I always will. But if you want me to go, I need to hear you say it.”
When she didn’t say anything else, he felt his heart drop. “I…I guess I should be going, then. Merry Christmas, Sylvie.” he whispered, turning to walk away.
“No, Loki, wait,” she pulled the door open, revealing red puffy eyes that confirmed that she had indeed been crying before he showed up, “Come in? Please?”
Inside, Loki saw that she had been watching some Christmas movie he remembered from his childhood, something about a train going to the north pole. It had been one of his favorites, he remembered telling her.
“I shouldn’t have kicked you out,” Sylvie said after pouring him a drink, “I didn’t respond to you because I…well, I convinced myself that maybe you didn’t actually want to get a response. I don’t know…”
“You have nothing to apologize for. I was the one in the wrong. And I promise, if you’ll give me another chance, I’ll help more around the house. I’ll help cook, clean, whatever you want. I won’t bring work home, I’ll focus more energy on you.”
Sylvie threw her arms around him, “I love you Loki. I promise I won’t throw you out again over something so stupid…but I’m going to hold you to that.” she added jokingly.
He held her close, “I love you too, more than you’ll ever know,” he said, “I meant what I said. I’ll always love you darling, and I always will.”
Soon, the two found themselves cuddled up on the couch, restarting the movie so they could watch it together as Sylvie popped popcorn. “After this,” she smiled, “We’ll make some cookies. My mothers recipe.”
As the movie played on, Sylvie snuggled up to his side, Loki glanced out the window and smiled when he saw that the snow had finally begun to fall. And in the distance, he could see those Christmas lights still shining on.