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“Take 5. Action”
[OCTAVIA ENTERS THE ROOM, LOOKING OVER TO HER DAD WHOSE SITTING DOWN.]
“..Daddy?”
[STOLAS TWISTS HIS ENTIRE BODY TO FACE HER]
“Ah, hello my little- AOW, SHIT!” Stolas immediately falls off from the stool and lands face first on the ground. Octavia quickly lets out a squeak, before laughing aloud.
“DAD- OH MY GODHAHAHA”
“CURSE YOU STOOLS!!!” Stolas shouts as he raises his fist towards the stool to which that sabotaged his ass.
[BEEP]
“Take 3. Action.”
[OCTAVIA AND STOLAS CONTINUE THEIR CONVERSATION.]
“Dad.. are you sure? I-I could go check it for you..”
“No, no, fuck that. Don’t do that. PLEASE don’t do that you’re gonna get us all fucking killed Octavia” Stolas says with bated breath before breaking down into laughter.
Octavia chokes on her own spit, before quickly shouting “whAH, DAD?? REALLY”
“IT WAS WORTH GETTING OUT OF CHARACTER FOR THAT VIA!! BELIEVE ME.”
“DAD! YOU’RE SO UNBELIEVABLY STUPID!” She says, still laughing her ass off
“HHOHOOHOOO-"
[BEEP]
“Take 2. Vamonos.”
[OCTAVIA IS ABOUT TO LEAVE THE ROOM.]
“Fine, I get it.” Octavia says, before walking backwards and accidentally hitting her head against the wall as she turns around.
“OW- FUCK!”
[BEEP]
“Take 4, take it or leave it.”
[OCTAVIA IS ABOUT TO LEAVE THE ROOM.]
“Fine, I get it. I’m gonna go listen to a generic angsty teen band in my room for three hours straight.” She says, standing still for a beat before quickly losing her breath and giggling. Stolas immediately followed with a similar laughter.
“OKAY, I didn’t know teenagers were THAT direct about their interests!”
[BEEP]
“Take 10.”
[STOLAS IS ABOUT TO RUN TO OCTAVIA.]
“Wait, I can just use my book to.. Agh, dammit all with a side of asmodeus’s.. VIA, SWEETY, HANG ON!”
Stolas quickly runs through the exit of his own room before slamming his forehead against the upper door frame, screeching loudly in pain while shouting “FUCK”
[BEEP]
“Take 1.”
[STOLAS AND OCTAVIA ARE DOING THE SPELL.]
“Now, Via, just do as I say. Recite the spell.. and imagine our front yard.”
“O-okay..”
…
…
“..O-okay, so how the fuck do I exactly do it? Do I just imagine the yard”
“Wh- Via, did we never practice the-”
“No. No, we didn’t, dad.”
“..Oh no, this might take a bit then.”
[BEEP]
“Take 7.”
[STOLAS AND OCTAVIA ARE DOING THE SPELL AGAIN.]
“Now, Via, just do as I say. Recite the spell.. And imagine our front yard.”
“O-okay..”
…
…
“...That is an apple, darling.”
“Look, I’m still trying, alright? Just be a little patient for me, dad.”
“Alright sweetie.”
[BEEP]
“Take 66.”
[STOLAS AND OCTAVIA ARE DOING THE SPELL… AGAIN.]
“Now, Via. Just do as I say. Recite the spell.. And imagine our front yard.”
“O-okay..”
…
…
“Via-”
“I know.”
[BEEP]
“Take 201.”
[STOLAS AND OCTAVIA ARE DOING THE FUCKING SPELL.]
“Now, Via, just do as I say. Recite the spell.. and imagine our front yard.”
“O-okay..”
Octavia closes her eyes and starts reciting the spell. As Stolas looks around in amazement to the sudden colors coming together, they clash to create Bojack Horseman’s mansion from hit show Bojack Horseman.
“...darling that is not our front yard.”
“Dad, do you have any idea how difficult it is to remember an entire front yard?? I know I just saw a photo of it, but that’s also extremely intricate.”
“WELL, YES, BUT THAT IS QUITE LITERALLY A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT MANSION SWEETIE.”
“YEAH, but it’s the first one that came to mind. I can’t not think of the mansion from Bojack Horseman when I think mansion.”
“..Mmm. Blitz has told me a lot about that show..”
muffled “Oh my fucking god.”
[BEEP]
“Take 1832.”
[STOLAS AND OCTAVIA ARE DOING THAT FUCKING SPELL AGAIN.]
“Now, Via, just.. Just do as I say. Recite the spell.. And imagine our front yard.”
“Okay..”
Finally, after several attempts, the colors clash together to create the front yard of the mansion, in perfect and clear detail.
“YES, FUCK YES, WE FINALLY DID IT!”
“DAD YOU- WE’RE STILL RECORDING!!”
“GOD FUCKING DAMMIT!”
[BEEP]
“Take 1.”
[STOLAS AND OCTAVIA LOOK THROUGH THE ONE-WAY WINDOW]
“Anywhooo~.. Let’s take a quick looksy, shall we?”
They both peer into the window to see absolutely nobody there.
“...Where the fuck did Grimm go?”
“AH, PARDON, I DIDN’T MEAN TO ARRIVE AT SUCH AN UNTIMELY MANNER”
Grimm says, panicking, putting on his cloak last second before tripping on the entrance stairwell
[BEEP]
“Taking 4, action.”
[OCTAVIA MAKES A FUNNY JOKE]
“He looks like a long lost relative of yours, dad.” Octavia jokes, putting her hand to her beak as she chuckles a little. “Probably the eyes.”
“..Listen, dear, unlike Grimm, I’m actually hot.”
…
…
“I said his name, huh. oops”
They both immediately start laughing, as does Grimm through the window, as he’s able to hear all the commotion.
[BEEP]
“5 for 5, rolling.”
[STOLAS MEETS GRIMM]
“..Hello there! What might bring your delicious bitchass here?”
“Stolas, I am amused at how quickly you can fuck up your lines.”
[BEEP]
“Take 10. Action.”
[STOLAS MEETS GRIMM CONT.]
“A pleasure to meet you too, Grimm. Odd question, but would you happen to be a sinner of sorts? I don’t believe you’re one of my siblings and I don’t believe I’ve ever met you before.”
“Not at all. We travel at the- HACK - COUGH -
[BEEP]
“Take 1. Don’t fuck it up.”
[STOLAS SCREAMS VERY LOUDLY]
“...Who the fuck wrote this script?”
[BEEP]
“Take 2. Don’t fuck fuck it up.”
[STOLAS SCREAMS VERY LOUDLY AT THE FACT THAT THERE IS A CIRCUS TENT PARKED IN HIS GATES]
“Oh, okay.”
…
“I was supposed to scream, huh.”
“Stolas, as a gentleman who tries not to trifle the opposing person, I despise you.”
[BEEP]
“Take 5.”
[GRIMM GIVES STOLAS INSTRUCTIONS]
“Seek my kin, claim their flame, and return to me. My child will guide you to the flame. Together, the two of us, we will-”
“Three.”
“......THREE. IT’S THREE. I FORGOT TO INCLUDE MY OWN CHILD.”
Stolas roars with laughter, nearly falling down the stairs in the process and slamming his head in
[BEEP]
“Take 1.”
[GRIMM SEES BLITZO FOR THE FIRST TIME, ESCORTED BY BRUMM.]
“Master. The special visitor is here. They request your presence.”
“Master?” Grimm utters in confusion, before realizing he questioned the wrong word. “...Ah. Okay, let me retry that.”
[BEEP]
“Take 2.”
[GRIMM SEES BLITZO FOR THE FIRST TIME, ESCORTED BY BRUMM.]
“Master. The special visitor here. They request your presence.”
“Special?” Grimm utters in confusion. He never asked for any special visitors.
“Get them away from me. They aren’t special to me.”
“...Weren’t we supposed to let them in?”
“Wait, we-” Grimm quickly looks through the script.
“Oops.”
[BEEP]
“Take 8.”
[BLITZO IS AN ASSHOLE TO GRIMM]
“Oh, hey, Stols, why are- wait, who the fuck are you?”
“You appear to be mistaken. I’m-”
“FUCK OFF, cunt. I need to get into your MOTHERFUCKING circus with the MOTHERFUCKING audience to get to see my HOT FUCKING owl bitch perform like the BESTEST BIGGEST BITCH IN THE WHOLE WIDE BITCHWORLD who I have MARITAL SEX with. HE’S GONNA LOOK SO FUCKING AWESOME AND I WILL BE THERE FOR IT! SO YOU’LL JHG-ghGH-PFF-”
Grimm quickly bursts into laughter mid sentence while Blitzo quickly breaks down into his own cackling afterwards before he could completely finish his satire bickering. Stolas, meanwhile, feels his face get a little hotter in the background, fanning himself off.
[BEEP]
“Take 20.”
[STOLAS AND GRIMMCHILD BOND]
“Well, that was certainly a trek that spanned an entire five minutes of my living day, little one. You appear to be well-fed with those.. Weird flames that I borrowed from the souls of your brethren, probably. Are you alright?”
“Wrraaaahhhh!”
“...” Stolas can feel a stupid smile come up after the Grimmchild said that. Grimm shouts from behind the stage
“WHAT HAPPENED??”
“LOOK, I’M SORRY, THIS THING IS TOO FUCKING ADORABLE, ALRIGHT? I CAN’T HELP IT :(“
[BEEP]
“Take 32.”
[STOLAS VS GRIMM INTRO]
“HALT!.. That was.. Fuck, That was way too loud.”
“NO! It was completely fine, darling!”
“No, no, that was definitely too loud. I’m sorry”
“I felt the passion in that one, Grimm, I assure you it was incredible. but don’t worry, give it another go.”
[BEEP]
“Take 53”
[STOLAS VS GRIMM INTRO AGAIN]
“HALT!- gAH” His voice cracks immediately as he says it.
“BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA”
[BEEP]
“Take 1.”
[GRIMM VS STOLAS.]
Surprisingly, against all odds, they were able to do the entire magic performance in one go, including the tango, body swap, the circus rising up, and the final takedown of Grimm, in one passionate cut.
“Cut! That was
absolutely
perfect!”
“HOOOOOOOLY FUCK !” They say in unison
Both Grimm and Stolas are exasperated as they fall to the ground, unsure as to how they even conducted that perfectly. Octavia comes over to the set and fetch the two some cold cups of water, who was also in awe of the performance, as they look over to each other, really pleased with the results.
“Goddamn, Grimm! That was.. Huff… REALLY fucking impressive!”
Huff “Likewise..”
“Jeez, why did we even do that in one go??”
“I don’t really care. It was done perfectly, friend.”
[BEEP]
“Take 7.”
[STOLAS SLIPS UP A LITTLE]
“Truly, I cannot emphasize how incredible your skills were. It’s as if you had done this before.”
“Well, of course, I was the one who railed the fUUHGHGHAHAHA”
“STOLAAAAAAASSSSSS” (this was not grimm, but in fact this was blitz shouting this. Grimm did proceed to cover his face with his cloak and start laughing
[BEEP]
“Take 9. Action”
[GRIMM DRAMATIC ENDING SPEECH.]
“...Yes.. even if all my intent was to fulfill my purpose, I appreciate your politeness and compliance. It was very rude of me to assume your personality from an honest reaction to something so sudden. Perhaps in another life, we’ll meet again. But for now.. I bid adieu. Look after your son very- FUCK ”
“GODDAMMIT GRIMM!”
[BEEP]
“Take 10. Action.”
[GRIMM DISAPPEARS]
As grimm says those words, he covers himself up in his cloak, and a flame devours him, slowly making him disappear.
…
…
“OW-”
Grimm slightly hits his head against the wall while invisible, covering his head as he becomes visible again.
“Does becoming invisible also make you blind, dear?”
“Hah… silence yourself.”
[BEEP]
“Take 1. Go for it.”
[STOLAS AND BLITZ HAVE A CONVERSATION PLEASE DON’T MAKE-OUT]
“W- Dude, what the fuck is that addition??”
“Oh how DARE the producers think so little of their ACTORS!”
“Stolas”
“They think that THEY are above US in this hierarchy of work?”
“Stolas I swear to fuckin lucifer”
“Now, dearest Blitz! Let us kiss very violently to prove a point that we are just as equal to them as they are!”
“You motherfucking- Alright, fine, let’s do this. Just try to keep care around the horns, mkay?”
“..I’ll be very, very gentle~”
And then they have the gayest sloppiest make-out session for 30 minutes, to the dismay of the producers watching and realizing they indirectly caused this to happen. Imagine how Grimm feels. Actually, wait, as the writer I’m SUPPOSED to be describing that. He’s watching respectfully and taking notes on his ‘tactics’. Canon Grimm would definitely do that. Definitely.
[BEEP]
“Take 2. Please don’t fuck.”
[STOLAS AND BLITZ HAVE A CONVERSATION]
“Stolas, holy shit, man! That was fucking cold! And hot! But really fucking cold! Like, the hot king of cold! You’re hot! Fucking kiss me bitch!”
“HELL YES”
I think we all know what happens next so let's just skip to the end.
[BEEP]
“ Take 9862. glad the editor’s keeping count of these; Action.”
[STOLAS AND BLITZ. PLEASE HAVE A FUCKING CONVERSATION.]
“...We’ll do it the next take, promise, just give us one more.”
The entire building of people groaned as they heard the exact same sound of lips clashing.
[BEEP]
“ Take 17.”
[BLITZ TELLS STOLAS HE RECORDED THE PERFORMANCE]
“Ooh, yeah, one thing. See, Loony wanted me to record it. Would be fun to see her reaction up-close. Bet she won’t see that shit coming.”
“YOU-YOU REHAHRWAHRDED IT?”
“what the hell did you just say”
“It...It appears my brain broke at that moment.”
[BEEP]
“Take 4”
[STOLAS AND OCTAVIA ‘REUNITE’]
“Sweetie? I’m back from my.. Odd encounter!”
“DADDY??”
Octavia bursts through the door, which knocks Stolas back a couple of feet.
“OH SHI- DAD, ARE YOU OKAY??”
“AAAAAAAaaGH, FUCK, YES.. yes, i’m okay Via. Please.. A little more careful next time. Jeez..”
[BEEP]
“Take 3. Nearly there now.”
[STOLAS PUTS THE PHOTO ON THE PHOTO WALL]
“Thank you for creating another story to talk about, Grimm. I will never, ever forget about our performance, my friend.”
He softly puts the photo onto the wall and looks away, approaching the bed. Stolas can hear a slight soft fluttering.
He sighs. “...That was the photo wasn’t it” He looks back to see that the photo fell down from the board.
“...Fuck.”
[BEEP]