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It's been a long day as Tara falls into a chair in the round table room, her body aching from the tension of the day that is only just starting to fade, her mind racing. She is startled out of her stupor when she hears a small, polite cough from the tall young man standing in the doorway.
“Spencer,” Tara says softly, trying to disguise her exhaustion as surprise “what are you doing here? Not that I’m not glad to see you but I thought you would still be busy preparing for your next lecture?” Spencer smiles gingerly, his long body always coming off as awkward even when he’s attempting to be casual, his tie loose at his neck.
“I’d finished writing my lecture by the time I got off of the train to the university,” he smiles bashfully, rubbing the back of his neck.
“You wrote a whole lecture on a 2 hour commute? Impressive” Tara smiles, glad to be talking about academics and not emotions for the first time today.
Spencer shakes his head. “I finished the entire lecture series..” he clarifies, chuckling quietly, Tara knows it's not him showing off, it's just true. It’s just Reid.
“Wow,” Tara laughs “you never cease to amaze me Doctor” she teases.
“Anyway, enough about me, Garcia told me that you guys were heading back from a pretty hard case?” Spencer says gently, his eyes filled with concern.
“Yeah…” Tara sighs, letting her head fall back against the headrest.
“I heard you talked down the unsub, good job” Spencer compliments, giving her a slightly sad smile. “Penelope told me about.. About your ex husband” he continues tentatively “this case must have been really hard”.
Silence fills the space for a moment, Tara considers being mad at Penelope for a second before logically reasoning that Garcia would have only told Spencer from a place of caring. “Yeah,” her voice is distant “it was hard.. My marriage and this case”.
Spencer surprises Tara by sitting down opposite her and placing his hand on her arm. “You’re a very strong woman Tara” he states offering her a gentle smile, his eyes shining with something, pity? No, understanding.
“Thanks Reid..” Tara whispers, slightly confused by his sudden sympathy, not that he wasn't usually sympathetic but this felt different somehow. Tara jumps slightly as Spencer breaks the comfortable silence.
“Can I show you something?” he says tentatively.
“Of course, Reid” Tara urges, trying to sound encouraging. Spencer pauses for a second as if contemplating if he wants to change his mind before nodding resolutely, reaching into the breast pocket of his blazer and pulling out what looks like a large coin or a poker chip?
“I’m 7 years sober” Spencer says, shaky but proud, placing a large bronze NA chip on the table before her. Tara’s breath catches in her throat for a moment as she stares down at the chip on the table. ‘You are a very strong woman Tara’ he had said, it wasn't sympathy, it was empathy. Tara opens and closes her mouth several times as if trying desperately to figure out what to say.
“Dilaudid. Originally mixed with a powerful hallucinogen” Spencer gulps, his eyes soft and, almost imperceptibly through his decades old facade, vulnerable.. “An unsub, Tobias Hankel, he tortured me, well his alternate personality did, but Tobias, he- he wanted to take my pain away so, he drugged me. Afterwards.. It was hard to stop” Spencer fidgets with the curls at the back of his head, Tara has known him long enough to read when he’s anxious, it hurts her heart to think that he might be worried about her reaction. So she takes the initiative, desperate to wipe the sad, distant look off of Spencer’s face, she stands up and hugs him tight.
“I am so proud of you” she states, it's the truth, after everything Spencer has been through, she would have taken drugs or worse if she had had to face that. She considers telling him so, but thinks better of it. This moment is about Spencer’s successes not his suffering.
“Thanks” Spencer says smiling, hugging her back, his face flushed. “Just know that if you ever want to talk about anything, about your husband's addiction, or anything else, I’m here.” he says sincerely. “I’ve been told I make an excellent little brother” he smirks.
“I may very well take you up on that one day” Tara snickers, smiling genuinely for the first time all day.