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Regulus was completely relaxed as he was sheltered behind the privacy of the curtains of his bed.
His arms were around his boyfriend who was lying in the space between his legs. James absently traced invisible patterns with his fingertips on the back of his hand and palm and Regulus let out a sigh of contentment.
He was not a person who normally (practically ever) received physical contact, not because he didn't want it, but because deep down, it embarrassed him. He had been taught at home for as long as he could remember that empathy and receiving comfort were exactly the same as pity and handouts.
When he was little, Sirius was the one who took care of him more than their parents. When he was hurt Sirius was the one who held him until the pain passed, when he had nightmares he was the one who let him climb into his bed and listened attentively to his dream while he gently scratched his scalp and then patiently calmed his fears. However, Sirius was also a child, and for all the effort he had put into protecting his little brother from the cruelty of their parents and giving him all the love he could (even though he didn't quite know how to do it himself, since he had never received it from anyone) their words still penetrated his flesh and found a permanent home in his mind.
Regulus grew up and unlike his brother who had flatly rejected all the things Walburga and Orion had tried to teach them, he could not. It became an instinct to push the hands away from his shoulders, to avoid the open arms of his friends and to ignore small, loving gestures that in the past, when he was a child, had always comforted him.
Regulus didn't want to do that. He just didn't know how to ask for what he needed, but he also didn't know how to accept it when it was offered. All those years of longing for that special kind of comfort and connection with someone festered inside him and made him feel starved.
When James came into his life it was as if it had taken him only a look to realise it. Regulus thought it was ironic that a boy as blind as a bat could have noticed something that others did not. But he had. And it was as if he made it his personal mission to give him what he had been silently begging for so long.
He did it slowly as if he was afraid of overwhelming him, and that it would all result in Regulus hating him and pushing him away forever. He approached him gradually, patiently and carefully.
At first it was simple brushes on the parts where her skin was covered by layers of clothing. He would let their shoulders bump amicably when they were together, sit beside him on the sofas in the Gryffindor common room letting their thighs touch, things subtle enough to seem accidental, unintentional. But they were there.
Then it was resting a hand delicately on his shoulder or poking his side with his finger playfully, touches so fleeting that Regulus couldn't bring himself to enjoy the familiarity behind them properly before they were gone.
Then the skin-to-skin contact began, a small casual brush of their hands as they passed each other in the corridors, brushing a curl away from his face as his fingertips caressed his forehead.
James was feeding a thirsty man with an eyedropper. And as grateful as he was for his consideration and the respect he was showing him, all he wanted most of the time was more.
And he got it.
After a year of James testing the waters and slowly growing closer to him their friendship had reached a point where the most normal thing was that if they were in the same room they were probably next to each other. James enjoyed putting an arm around his shoulders when they walked down the corridors together, taking his hand to drag him somewhere and never missing an opportunity to hug him when he sensed that Regulus was having one of his bad days.
Even on his birthday he and his brother (who had convinced Regulus to lie to his parents to allow them to stay at Hogwarts for the winter break) along with the rest of his friends had thrown him a surprise party and when everyone had already congratulated him James took him to a corner of the room and handed him his present with slightly flushed cheeks and a shy expression that was so uncharacteristically shy and sweet that he felt the urge to punch him because who gave him the right to look so adorable?
Regulus opened it knowing that whatever it was he was going to love it because it came from James and yet he wasn't prepared for the emotion that came over him when he found a beautiful hardback edition of 'The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue'. The book had become one of his all-time favourites since he had read it a few months ago when Remus had lent it to him.
He had devoured it in a day but had not returned it until a week later as he had reread and reread it, refusing to be separated from it so soon. All he wanted to do was fill the book with notes about his reactions, thoughts and feelings, make little drawings in the margins or in the blank spaces at the end of a chapter and highlight his favourite phrases. He knew Remus wouldn't mind, every time he did that he was delighted to be able to share his reading and opinions with Regulus. But everything that book made him feel was too personal to share. He had resigned himself to having to wait for a time during the summer holidays when he could sneak away with Sirius to Muggle London so that he could buy his own copy.
He'd shared his frustration about the whole thing with James after telling him all about the book and the bastard had given him this beautiful edition that he hadn't even seen when he'd gone on amazon to look at all the options and sigh with longing. It was absolutely gorgeous and larger than normal, lined in a velvet-like fabric, the edges and title in French highlighted with silver detailing, and on the back the constellation of Addie also engraved in silver. Regulus stood in place holding the book and running his fingers delicately over all the details with admiration. A couple of minutes had passed and Regulus still stood there in complete shock from all the emotions that were choking his heart with pure warmth.
Apparently James had interpreted this the wrong way.
"Listen, I know it looks awful but I did the best I could, it's my first time bookbinding and my hands are too big to do such fine and delicate work but I really tried. If you don't like it I can give you something else-"
Regulus looked up sharply
"James you... you made this? With your own hands?"
James looked away with an anxious expression, he was scanning every spot in the room with his eyes, as if he needed to concentrate on anything other than his reaction. "Well, yeah. I knew how much you loved that book but I didn't want to just give you something bought straight from the shop. I wanted to make it special. So I ordered a copy on amazon in English and one in French because I thought you might like to read it in your two native languages. My mother received them at home and sent them to me here a few weeks ago. The following weekend I went to Hogsmeade and got the rest of the materials and after many, many youtube tutorials I managed to make something minimally decent. But I would completely understand if you don't like it." Finally his eyes met Regulus' which were glistening with tears.
"Reg what..."
Regulus threw his arms around his neck and held him so close, as if he squeezed them together hard enough their bodies would merge into one and they would never have to be separated again. He could always try. James wrapped his arms around him after a few seconds and they both just stayed there, enjoying being like this. Regulus felt an instant relief, as he always did when he held him, as if he had been searching for his home, the place for him all his life and had finally found it in James Potter's warm, strong arms. All his senses were invaded by him, his heat, his familiar scent of cedar and eucalyptus, the way James held him, as if no one could take him away from Regulus unless they cut off his limbs, and at the same time his gentleness, as if he was something delicate and precious.
After a few minutes James spoke again so close to his ear that his breath caused him to shiver. "So... that means you liked it?"
He sounded so hopeful and happy, as if it was his birthday and his reaction was exactly the gift he had so eagerly asked for.
Regulus thought nothing as he pulled away from his embrace slightly to give him a soft kiss on the cheek and look into his eyes with all the earnestness and happiness he felt. "Yes, you absolute idiot. I love it, I love it, I love it."
I love you provided his mind and the words almost escaped his mouth in a breathless whisper.
The realisation hit him so suddenly as a bludger missed that Regulus pulled away so fast that he almost lost his balance and fell on his arse.
James looked up at him with confusion etched on his features. "Thanks Jamie, I love it, it's perfect." You're perfect.
"Reggie you little shit get back here"
For once in his life Regulus was grateful that his older brother didn't have the manners not to interrupt a conversation. He saw his chance to escape and took it before he let out words that would ruin one of the best things in his life.
Because there was no way James loved him too. Yes, he was clingy and affectionate with him, had made a great effort to get close to him and always seemed content to spend time with Regulus alone, even if it was just to do something as boring as homework. But that was James. Even their friends weren't surprised to realise that James was an exception to their rule of no physical affection. They just accepted it as normal, it was 'the James effect', no one could resist. He loved everyone with all his heart, Regulus wasn't special.
Or at least that's what he thought.
He avoided James for the rest of the night, refusing to face his latest discovery. He couldn't even drink too much alcohol for fear of confessing when he was drunk. James seemed to notice something was wrong and tried to talk to him but every time he gave the slightest hint that he was going to approach Regulus did what he did best. Run away.
He spent a couple of weeks like that, running away from James as if that also meant he could ignore this love that had wrapped itself fatally around his heart. But of course James wasn't going to let that happen for long. Apparently he had decided that he was worth fighting for and he wasn't about to give up.
Regulus was really glad he fought.
After all, that brought them here, James with him, curled up in his arms on his bed.
They always used to find a moment in the day between their classes or before meals to snuggle together, whether it was thirty, fifteen or five minutes. It was a way for both of them to recharge their energies.
James couldn't help but maintain a cheerful mood and a positive, confident attitude in front of the whole school; he wanted to be there for everyone. And even though the sun always shone so brightly for everyone else, he also needed the stars at night to light up the sky while he took a break.
It was these little quiet moments when it was just the two of them that made his days more bearable. James needed a moment to just exist, without feeling the pressure of having to fulfil the role of the perfect golden boy. Regulus needed a moment of peace, away from all the hustle and bustle. He needed a moment to relax away from the rest of the world.
James was his exception, just as Regulus was his. It was just them. They weren't Regulus Black and James Potter. They were just two people who loved each other and had found refuge and safety in each other.
That was one of the main reasons they had decided months ago to keep their relationship as a secret. Neither of them were sure they wanted to share it with the others. It was something of theirs, to nurture and let grow strong like a tree, not for someone else to try to come along and crush it.
His thoughts left the front of his mind when he realised that James was no longer touching his hands but instead had his thumb between his lips, biting his fingernail with a distant expression.
You would think that after months of being in a relationship with James, the person whose main love language is physical contact, Regulus' hunger would diminish... but no. He always wanted more and more, after all he was always a selfish and ambitious boy, he wasn't ashamed of wanting absolutely every part of James. He knows, deep inside him, that he'll never get enough of him.
" Baby, what's wrong?" he said as he ran a hand through his hair that was in all directions, in an attempt to get his boyfriend to focus again. Sometimes that happened. An idea would creep into his mind and James couldn't let it go until he said it out loud to someone.
"Nothing love" James turned and looked at him with a soft smile but he saw in his eyes that the thought was definitely still there.
"James Fleamont Potter, tell me."
"No, you'll laugh at me."
"I always laugh at you James, it won't be anything new."
"Reeeg" James said stretching out the word like a child and pouting.
Regulus stared at him with a raised eyebrow, not even ten seconds passed when he gave up.
He let out a small groan of frustration and hid his face in his hands "Alright." He reached for his phone in his pocket and unlocked it.
He started looking for something that Regulus couldn't see as his back was turned to him. After a minute James turned around and sat down on his knees in front of him. Then he handed him the phone.
It was a tik tok. A girl was painting her lips red and when she accidentally smudges the skin around her lips a hand tries to wipe it off. At that moment the camera shows a boy with a face full of red kisses.
"You want to do it don't you?" he asked already knowing the answer.
James loved this sort of thing, Regulus wasn't a big fan of filming himself or taking pictures but it made James very happy and he had to admit he loved having so many memories together. At what point had he become such a cheesy person? James was a bad influence.
His boyfriend nodded giving him puppy eyes. Cunning bastard.
"Fine, let's do it."
"Do you want to be the lips or the kisses one?"
Regulus thought about it for a couple of seconds. Honestly he had pretty sensitive skin, if he wore anything weird then his skin would be easily irritated.
"Lips, but I don't have any lipstick, maybe I can borrow one from Dorcas later?"
James pulled a small lipstick out of his pocket, with a proud expression.
"Where did you get that?"
"Marlene helped me get it."
"And this will come out with water?"
"Yep, that's what she told me."
Regulus got up to go apply it in front of the bathroom mirror but James took his hand and stopped him. "Can I do it?"
Regulus nodded hesitantly, suddenly a little shy.
James straddled him and began to apply the lipstick, the consistency was rather runny, different to the stick lipsticks he used to see Dorcas wear or Pandora's glosses. It was a slightly uncomfortable feeling and with James looking at his lips so intently with his brows furrowed in an expression of concentration and their bodies so close Regulus became a little anxious. Part of him wanted to grab James and kiss him until they were both senseless, and the other part wanted to hide his face with a pillow. Being loved felt like this, scary and a little intimidating at times, but in the best possible way. And at least in his opinion, when it came to James Potter, it was completely worth it.
" Done" James declared in a triumphant tone, stepping back slightly to look at his work. After a few seconds he nodded in satisfaction before launching himself at Regulus and giving him a soft kiss. Just a light press of his lips against his.
A surge of affection washed over him and he began to leave tender kisses all over his face. His cheeks, his forehead, his nose, his chin, the corners of his mouth, over his cheekbones, and his neck, after a minute James' face was almost completely covered with kisses.
When they pulled away James smiled at him with sparkles in his eyes and dimples in his cheeks and touched up his faded lipstick. They recorded the tiktok quickly, one attempt was enough, when they saw the result they both laughed like idiots and James kept it private and sent it to him.
James gave him a sly look and discarded his phone on his bedside table. Without missing a beat he pulled him to his arms and began kissing him fiercely and Regulus reciprocated, ever hungry for him. No one could blame Regulus for being addicted to this boy. If they had him then they would understand, but fortunately they never would because James was his. His alone.
James parted his lips and began to leave small kisses at the corner of his mouth, on his cheek, on his jaw, down his neck leaving a trail of fire wherever his lips touched it until he reached his chest, where he stopped and let his lips simply rest on the spot where his heart was beating erratically, feeling it.
Regulus lowered the hand that was buried in James' curls to place it on his chest, right above his boyfriend's heart that was beating with the same intensity.
They both looked into each other's eyes, feeling their hearts synchronise and beat at the same time.
Mine, James shouted Regulus's heart.
Yours, Regulus James's heart answered.
"You don't know how much I love you Jamie" his voice broke slightly at the end, overcome by the love and truth his words contained.
"If it's half as much as I love you then I'd be the most loved human that ever lived. I love you so much that I'm sure I'd find you anywhere, in any life, any universe."
Regulus hugged him in his arms and they both stayed like that for a couple of minutes. Just feeling the words wrap through their hearts like golden threads and sink into their flesh leaving a mark, as if it were an unbreakable oath.
Suddenly James' phone rang with an alarm and he jumped out of bed.
"It's getting late for dinner, we have to go, I'll run first so you don't have to wait so long," he said all the words together almost unintelligibly before giving him a chaste kiss and running out the door as he put on his invisibility cloak.
Regulus laughed, James had left with his face still completely covered in kisses.
Well, maybe it won't be so bad, he thought, so maybe all the girls and boys who were shamelessly flirting with James would get the hint that he wasn't available.
Still amused by his boyfriend's exit, he took a handkerchief from his nightstand and conjured an aguamenti with his wand. He gently wiped his lips and when he took the handkerchief away he saw that it was practically clean. Probably after all the kisses they had given each other it had already faded completely. He felt a sort of uncomfortable dryness on his lips so he took his lip moisturiser and applied it before leaving his room and heading to the Great Dining Hall.
✧✧✧
Lily arrived early for dinner along with Mary, she sat in her usual place at the Gryffindor table near all her friends.
Sirius and Remus were sitting close together across from her, Peter was to her left, Marlene was to her right and before Mary sat down she slammed her hands on the table drawing the attention of her friends and a couple of first years. Most of the rest of their classmates were already used to their group always making dramatic gestures that attracted a bit of attention. They could let out a horror movie scream in the middle of breakfast or pop the mashed potatoes during lunch and the most they'd get was a look.
If Lily didn't love them so much she would have cursed them twenty times already for disturbing her peace.
"I've got a gossip Sirius," Mary's words immediately caught the attention of the boy who until a moment ago had been focused on talking to Remus.
"It was supposed to be secret Mary" Marlene complained.
"No, imagine he falls for the trap and we don't see it and don't find out."
"What trap? Who? Spill the tea Macdonald" said Sirius with growing interest.
Lily sighed in amusement.
Since Sirius and Mary broke up in third year their relationship had become a rather close friendship, James and Sirius were soul mates, but Mary and Sirius understood each other in their own special way like Lily and Remus or James and Marlene.
And they were both the worst gossips in the whole school. If any scandal had happened then they would be the first to know.
"James" declared Mary.
"What's going on with James?"
"You know we all think he's seeing someone right?"
"We don't think, we're sure, he sneaks out at least three nights a week and comes back before dawn and when we ask him he gets too nervous and pretends he doesn't know what we're talking about. I've tried to follow him but he takes the cloak and the map with him. I don't know how he does it, once I even fell asleep with the map in my arms." grumbled Sirius.
"I don't think it was too hard for him, you're such a heavy sleeper, you even snore..."
Sirius hastily covered Remus' mouth with his hand as he blushed "Moony, that's not true."
"Of course it is Pads."
"Well, never mind" Mary interrupted them before they got too far off topic "the thing is, the other day James went to Marlene and asked her for help buying a lipstick. We suspect it's related to his mystery lover."
"I gave him one of those waterproof lipsticks so it's hard to remove and we have a better chance of finding out," She explained.
"So when we see any students with that red lipstick then we'll know" finished Mary.
"It's brilliant," said Sirius, his eyes sparkling with excitement.
Lily knew that Sirius deep down inside was a little hurt that James was keeping this special person from him, but he had shown great maturity (after two months of trying to follow James around at night and a talk about respecting privacy from Remus) in deciding to wait and give James his space.
Unfortunately for James, who had a score to settle with Marlene for accidentally exposing her to Dorcas during a game of truth or dare with veritaserum at one of the Slytherin parties, she wasn't going to let him get away with it.
"That's a very good idea, but do you really think James is going to be clueless enough to..." Peter stopped mid-sentence "Forget it. Shall we make bets?"
"Five galleons that is a Hufflepuff," said Sirius.
And so everyone in their group said their bets, some mentioning only a house and others first and last names.
✧✧✧
When the food arrived Sirius tilted his head slightly to scan the Slytherin table. All of his brother's friends were there, but he wasn't. He was a little worried.
They had both been under a lot of stress lately. This holiday, before Sirius returned for his final year and Regulus for his sixth, their parents had started bringing up the subject of suitors and marriage contracts. Neither of them expected them to bring that to the table so soon, they thought they would wait until they were both finished with their studies. Things weren't so bad for them last year as Sirius learned to control himself and decided it was best to try and play along so Walburga and Orion wouldn't suspect.
He and his brother were already planning on leaving their family and going to live with the Potters, Sirius could have done it by now but he refused to leave his brother alone with their parents for even a day. Let alone months. Regulus insisted that it would be fine but Sirius refused and he knew deep down Regulus was extremely grateful.
It was only less than a week until his brother came of age and then their parents would no longer have control over them and it would all be over. Regulus's birthday was on the 7th of December, just before the winter holidays. They would not be returning to Grimmauld Place.
When they arrived at Hogwarts in September they brought as many of their belongings with them as possible without looking suspicious. They would spend their last Christmas all together at Hogwarts and when summer came they would officially move in with the Potters.
Sirius was so relieved that his little brother was coming with him. There was a time during his fourth year when he and Regulus had a big argument and drifted apart. It was very hard for both of them. They made up because Regulus came to him when he saw Sirius wandering around the castle alone like a soul in pain.
It was the year of the prank.
A shiver ran through him. Thinking about what he'd done still caused a sort of uncomfortable burning in his chest accompanied by a feeling of self-loathing and regret. Remus and his friends had already forgiven him. But he doesn't know if he will ever fully forgive himself.
After his reconciliation with his brother, the two tried to spend more time together, which included both of them getting to know each other's group of friends better. Sure, they knew who they were and could chat casually but they were not friends or close. It resulted with their circles of friends merging into one big group. Sirius had learned to like Crouch, Dorcas and Marlene became a couple and Lily had fallen madly in love with Pandora Rosier. James became close to Evan.
Remus and Regulus connected instantly. Sirius was very happy that his brother was getting along so well with his boyfriend, with his best friend on the other hand...
Sirius didn't quite understand them, at first Regulus had stayed away from James, it was probably because he had always been a bit jealous of their friendship. James for his part had tried everything to be Regulus' friend and for them to be as close as everyone else. Eventually he had succeeded, Sirius never doubted that he would, it was impossible to resist James when he was determined to win someone's affections. The two seemed genuinely comfortable with each other, James could keep up with Regulus' sarcastic and mean comments with a delighted smile, and they apparently found a lot of common topics because they would sometimes drift away from the group and stand in the corner of the room talking.
Sirius had grown very jealous, he was afraid that they loved each other more than they loved him and would leave him out. It might be a bit selfish but it was how he felt, however they were unfounded fears, neither James nor Regulus had ever made him feel like a bother. They had their moments when it was just them but they were such a large group of friends that it was normal for them to sometimes split into smaller parts from time to time. Plus he realised how happy and comfortable they seemed with each other and once their insecurities were dismissed he was genuinely delighted that they got along so well.
Everything was perfect until it wasn't anymore. One day Regulus was avoiding James again, if his friend walked into a room then he would walk out. Sirius got worried and spoke to them separately but they both told him they were fine and there was no need for him to intervene, so he left them to sort it out for themselves. After a couple of weeks things weren't quite back to the way they were, they were a bit more distant, but at least they were talking again and Regulus stopped avoiding James like the plague.
Sirius wished his brother and his best friend would get along better again.
He was talking to Marlene about the upcoming game they had against Hufflepuff when he heard the doors rattling. Sirius looked up and there was his best friend.
His best friend with his face covered with red kisses.
He started laughing uncontrollably and caught his friends' attention so they could see it too. They all started laughing as James walked over to them, blissfully unaware of the stares and whispers of the people around him.
"Hey guys," said his friend with a bright smile.
"Prongs, how are you?"
"I feel very good Pads and you?"
"Oh, I'm fabulous just now."
"Tell us James, why are you late?" asked Mary with a mischievous look on her face.
James was serving food on his plate avoiding looking anyone in the eye "Oh, I bumped into Peeves and he played a joke on me, I had to go and change my uniform."
They all gave each other knowing looks, and laughed.
"What's wrong?" asked James confused.
"Nothing," they all said at the same time.
James gave them a suspicious look with narrowed eyes but let it pass easily.
Their whole group was glancing at the door every now and then because they were sure they would show up at any moment.
Exactly ten minutes after James arrived the doors opened again but this time it was his little brother who walked through the door.
Wearing red lipstick.
If when James walked into the Great Hall people went crazy then when Regulus walked in, as the missing piece to solving the puzzle of who was responsible for the current state of his friend's face, everyone lost their fucking minds. And unlike James, Regulus did notice.
He saw his brother adopt a stiff stance and lift his chin as he did when he had to play the perfect pureblood son role at home. Sirius knew it was a method of self-preservation that surfaced when he felt intimidated or nervous.
The sequence was the following,
Regulus sat in his usual spot next to his friends.
He saw Pandora whisper something in Regulus' ear.
His brother's face went white as Barty pulled out his phone, probably to show him his face on camera.
His face went from white to a furious red.
James who had been following Regulus with his eyes since he walked in, also pulled out his phone to see himself and when he confirmed what everyone had already seen he covered his face with his hands mumbling things that only he could understand.
All of his friends were looking at him with varying levels of surprise and amusement. And Sirius...
Sirius was in shock.
James and Regulus...
His brother and his brother...
He just...
"Cool, I think you broke Sirius, James." Mary laughed.
James raised his head and looked at Sirius, a look of fear took over his features "Listen Pads, we were going to tell you I promise, I..."
"James, I think it would be best if we went to talk in our dorm" Remus interrupted him softly.
James opened his mouth but then closed it and simply nodded, getting up.
Sirius who was still speechless made no move to follow James, Peter and Moony. When Remus noticed, he came back for him and guided Sirius with an arm around his waist.
Distantly he heard Marlene shout.
"Come on Baby Black, family meeting!"
✧✧✧
James was sitting on his bed, with Regulus next to him at a decent distance, their hands clasped together in the middle of their bodies.
Sirius was sitting on Remus' bed across from them with a blank look on his face as if he was still in shock while Moony ran his hands through his hair, combing it tenderly in a soothing gesture.
James looked at his boyfriend, asking him a silent question. He nodded and immediately felt the presence of Regulus' mind in his own. It was cold, but not disagreeable like ice, but rather comforting. Like the cool waves of the sea lapping against your body on a hot day.
James adored it. Adored every part of him.
'What do we do?'
'I don't know, you should know, you're his best friend.'
'And you're his brother.'
'Yeah, but I was born with the curse, you chose it'.
'Reg' he gave him a scolding look.
'Fine, I just don't know what to do. Usually his first reaction is to scream like a dramatic bitch and play loud music while jumping up and down the walls. He's never just stayed quiet before.'
'What if we really broke him?'
Regulus rolled his eyes, and James could detect the look he always got when he was about to make a sarcastic comment.
At that moment Peter spoke up and interrupted their conversation. Regulus was out of his mind in an instant.
"I'm tired of waiting." Peter disappeared through the bathroom door and when he returned he was holding a plastic cup in his hands. He stood next to Sirius not wasting a moment before pouring the cup of water over his friend.
That seemed to do the trick because Padfoot jumped up "What the hell Wormy?"
"There, now you can talk" he ignored his friend's indignation as he walked over to his bed, sat down with a satisfied expression and pulled out a bag of popcorn.
James shot him a narrow-eyed look traitor.
Peter simply shrugged his shoulders dismissively.
"Then?" James looked back at Padfoot who was now standing in front of them with his arms locked and his eyes sparkling with anger.
"Padfoot-"
"No, dont make me Padpoot, like you're about to talk to an irrational child James. I have a right to be angry." His last words came out in too high a pitch so he paused for a second and closed his eyes to inhale deeply. "How long?" he said when he opened his eyes again.
"A couple of months," Regulus replied vaguely.
"How long?" repeated Sirius through gritted teeth.
James sighed defeatedly. "Three months."
"Three months... THREE MONTHS"
"Sirius, calm down..."
"No Moony, my brother and my supposed best friend have been going behind my back for three months, THREE MONTHS."
Regulus now stood up and faced his brother with a hard expression. James knew that he had a tendency to get defensive easily when he felt someone was threatening something he cared about. "That's enough Sirius. You're being unfair."
"Me? Unfair? How do you expect me to react to finding out that they've been keeping this from me for months Reggie?"
"Like a normal bloody person. Yeah, we didn't tell you, but it was none of your business."
"How could it be any less my business if it's my little brother and my best friend, if I can call him that after he lied to me all this time."
"It's simply none of your business. Just like your relationship with Remus is none of mine. This is just between James and me. No one else's."
As Sirius's voice went higher pitched, the volume of Regulus's remained the same but his tone dropped an octave, making it sound deeper and he spoke the words more quietly.
James could see how things were escalating too quickly with the Black brothers' volatile character. They were both too fast to get angry and their first instinct was to lash out until blood was drawn. He knew he had to intervene before everything went to hell.
Then he stood up and put a hand on his boyfriend's shoulder as he gave Sirius a pleading look, a look that begged him to please give him a chance to explain himself. His friend knew him all too well, so after a minute he finally nodded with a coldness in his features that James wasn't used to.
"Look Pads, this wasn't about keeping it from you. I promise you no one else knew about it. When we got together we talked about it and decided that we'd rather keep it just to ourselves for a while."
Regulus took his hand and squeezed it in a gesture that told James to leave this part to him. "I was the one who didn't want to tell anyone. I didn't want everyone to have something to say about us and throw their unnecessary opinions at us. I wanted to navigate this new development in our relationship without anyone else's influence." He looked at Sirius for a moment as if he was undecided whether to keep talking or not. Eventually he let out the air he had been holding in and the rage that was once all over his face melted away until all that was left behind was vulnerability and honesty. "I just... I was afraid to announce our relationship to all our friends and you only to break up a week later and have our whole group feeling weird and awkward. I didn't want to ruin everything we had built. Believe me, you would have been the first person to find out."
As soon as Regulus finished speaking Sirius rushed over to him and wrapped his arms around him, " Now listen Regulus, I know I've been a shitty brother before, but I promise I'll never leave you alone again. It doesn't matter if you don't want to hang out with my friends, if you date Prongs or if you break up with him. You're my little brother and you're just as or more important to me than any of them. I don't want you to feel like there's anything you can do to ruin us. You're stuck with me forever. Do you understand?"
James watched his boyfriend nod silently with slightly red glowing eyes. Half of his face was hidden in Sirius's shoulder and he clung to his brother as if he was the only stable thing in a world that was spinning too fast and threatening to topple him over.
The two brothers stayed in each other's arms for a few more seconds, but when they finally broke free James jumped over them both, one arm drawing each of them in.
"Merlin for a moment there I really thought Padfoot was going to throw me out the window."
"I'm still considering it so don't push your luck Potter. If I find out you've profaned my little brother's honour I'll make you marry him."
"Sirius you're being ridiculous," Regulus said in exasperation.
"I'd marry him tomorrow," James interrupted, still smirking.
Sirius pulled away and stared at him, analyzing him for a long minute until he nodded in satisfaction, as if he had found the answer he had been looking for. "And for the damage done to my person I will demand to be godfather to your first-born."
"At what point did we go from looking like you wanted to choke my boyfriend to talking about weddings and children?" asked Regulus in bewilderment.
Remus looked at him sympathetically "It's Sirius and James."
"Right, now everyone out of the dormitory except Moony. I need to have my moment."
James dragged Regulus towards the common room, feeling rather pleased to be leaving that dormitory with all of his limbs still attached to his body.
When they were at the bottom of the stairs they heard the music blaring out of their dormitory.
'Now go stand in the corner and think about what you did.'
The sound of drums and guitar chords echoed throughout the place.
"I can't believe we're brothers."
James couldn't help but let out a laugh, knowing that Regulus could be just as dramatic when he wanted to be. Evan once revealed to him that when Regulus thought James didn't reciprocate his feelings he spent every evening for a week listening to foolish one on loop. His boyfriend was simply more discreet about it.
"Love, I'm sorry about what happened-"
"Was that on purpose?" Regulus interrupted in a practical, neutral tone.
James looked at him in horror "Of course not Reg, I would never do anything like that to you."
"Then there's nothing to apologise for, it was an accident. Besides I was going to talk to you about it. I thought it was about time we told our friends."
"Really?"
"Hmh, hiding and keeping it a secret for a while was really fun and exciting. But now I want everyone to know you're my boyfriend and they should just give up."
His heart skipped a beat and he could feel the heat rising in his cheeks.
"They really don't have a opportunity."
"Not a fucking chance." his boyfriend said wrapping his arms around James' neck and brushing his lips against his.
"There they are. I am glad Sirius didn't kill you James, now you and Baby Black have to tell us absolutely everything."
Regulus frowned as Marlene dragged him towards the sofas in the common room where the rest of their friends were waiting for them. "I told you not to call me that."
"Whatever you say Baby Black."
James, who hadn't let go of his boyfriend's hand, was also dragged away with a grin so big he knew he'd wake up the next day with sore cheeks.