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Aziraphael and Crowley meandered through the museum, pausing in front of anything that caught their fancy. After all, they weren’t there to steal , only to look . Aziraphael had insisted on that, despite the Swiss Army knife in his pocket and the nervous energy about him.
Crowley had decided he’d better tag along, just to be safe.
When they reached the small ivory statue, labeled with a placard reading Adam and Eve , Crowley understood. Aziraphael was in one of his moods, and had chosen the memento of their old friends as a target.
They could have miracled the thing away, and Crowley said as much, but one glance from Aziraphael had him seated on a nearby bench, keeping watching on the other museum visitors while Aziraphael feigned contemplation of a painting. Apparently taking it the way a human would was the only fair and fun way to go about this.
Crowley bit back a sigh and tapped his foot loudly as he heard the steady clacking of the museum guard’s footsteps. Aziraphael quickly pocketed the Swiss Army knife and moved away from the statuette.
The statuette was secured in a plastic box, held in place by two screws. Aziraphael already had one in his pocket. The guard left the room, and he promptly returned to working away at the other.
Crowley tapped his foot again as a small gaggle of tourists approach the room’s threshold and Aziraphael springs away from the ivory sculpture. Crowley catches him slip a screw and the Swiss Army knife into his pocket. He nodded excitedly to Crowley before becoming very interested by a nearby painting.
It is usually good practice to communicate with your partner- romantic, business, criminal, or otherwise- with words rather than nods. Nods can mean a great number of things. For example, when Aziraphael nodded at Crowley, he meant something along the lines of “yes, jolly good job! Glad to have your support for this.”
When Crowley saw Aziraphael nod at him, he took it to mean “excellent! It’s been so much fun mucking about and pretending to be human art thieves. I’ve got it covered from here, you run along first so we won’t look suspicious leaving together.” And so Crowley got up from the bench and left.
Aziraphael’s smug smile and feigned interest in the painting both dove sharply when he noticed Crowley’s absence. Suddenly all this hopping about wasn't as fun anymore. He glanced towards the tourists, judged them sufficiently distracted, and walked back to the Adam and Eve . He picked up the plexiglass covering, set it down beside the statuette, tucked the statuette in his pocket, and walked directly past the tourists and out of the room.
Humans could be awfully blind to things sometimes.
The Bentley was parked outside the museum, with Crowley in the driver’s seat. Aziraphael wordlessly took his place in the passenger seat and showed him the piece of ivory.
The Adam and Eve depicted the world’s first couple as lean, unmuscled, and white. Adam had shoulder length wave-like hair. Eve’s face was round and sweet. Crowley frowned.
“Not a very good likeness, is it?”
“I don’t know,” Aziraphael said, a slight haze to his voice, like the one he gets when he comes across a book he doesn’t have. “Hardly anyone gets the shape of your head right. And look how long you are, as tall as them. See?”
And when Crowley looked again, he saw it, nestled in the broken tree stump between them, looking down at the pair. The snake was beautifully detailed, and quite large compared to the couple. He’d thought it was a part of the tree at first, but now that it was pointed out, he had to agree it was indeed a very fine likeness of himself.
He snorted a fond laugh and pulled the Bentley out of the museum parking lot. “You’ve got the real thing whenever you’d like it, you kleptomaniac.”
Aziraphael pouted at him. “Didn’t you have even a little fun? I thought demons were supposed to like this kind of thing.”
Crowley tossed his head, not meeting Aziraphael’s pleading eyes. “Alright, a little. It was a little fun.” It had been tremendous fun, but if he let the angel know that, he’d have him out robbing museums every weekend.
Although, that might not be the worst thing in the world.