Chapter Text
I probably shouldn't have run away.
When I did it, three years ago, I thought it was the best decision of my life. No pressure, no expectations, no one telling me what I was worth.
Joining an organized rebellion of magical creatures and enrolling in an elitist, hierarchical private school definitely had challenges, but at least people knew how to recognize my strengths.
At home? It’s everything that wasn't enough.
Not tall enough.
Not strong enough.
Not mature enough.
Nothing I did was ever enough. I was never enough.
So I ran. I set myself free, for a little bit.
Now I find myself walking across a little wooden bridge over a creek that carries with it the smell of the riverlands. The surrounding forest trees are increasingly covered in moss as I travel south, leaving the Faelands and entering the Yuelong Region.
It's early in the afternoon, and on any other day this week I would've been in class right now, sitting with my friends Draken and Jun, doodling stupid portraits of our professor during some boring lecture about magic. Later, we would head to the Hollowed Anarchy base and partake in brownies that Draken's brother Alo made, and then maybe do some sparring or patrolling. Maybe we would've pulled a prank on a senior member of the rebellion, or snuck into the supposed-to-be-forbidden library of Draken's dad, the leader of Hollowed Anarchy, and read for hours about world history.
But I’m nowhere near Macabre Academy in the Faelands, near the border of the human realm. I'm nowhere near the Hollowed Anarchy base, and Draken, Jun, nor anyone else knows where I've gone.
Two days ago, I received a letter. A letter from my father. He told me to come home.
I pause for a moment on the bridge, looking down at the water. My reflection looks back at me; a young, short girl with fair skin, a small face, and black hair, half loose and half tied into two side ponytails with lotus bud hair ties, and dressed in a crimson and black-colored school uniform. I honestly look no different from some ugly human girl, minus the violet eyes and subtle white markings on my skin that give away my identity as not-human, though I could very well be wearing a halloween costume.
"I don't look very intimidating, do I," I think aloud, looking down at myself with a hint of disdain.
Xiusu, my bodyguard and best friend, is standing behind me. Her graceful, tall and strong figure is a sharp contrast to mine. She has perfectly silky black hair falling around the pair of antlers that adorn her head, and her sharp yellow eyes are perfectly angled, enchanting yet deadly. Xiusu is everything I wish I'd been born with. “The pigtails don't help,” she answers bluntly.
I laugh a little bitterly. "They don't, do they?" I've really made a name for myself. My clothes are messy and unkempt, and my hair is styled like a doll's. It's like I can't pick between being rebellious or being cute, neither of which my family would like to see.
I yank the hair ties out of my hair and throw them into the creek. The moment I do, my appearance shifts like water flowing down my body - my black hair turns into a deep indigo, and my skin becomes covered in white markings that were previously hidden. My eyes become pale lavender. In an instant, my almost-human appearance is shed like snake skin to reveal ethereal beauty underneath. My family, the Lian family, are said to have beauty that could even make the Gods envious, balanced so perfectly with their strength and grace that no mortal or immortal could compare.
I look beautifully weak.
My long, silky hair falls messily in front of my face, hiding my cheeks which burn from anger and shame. Or maybe the burning is from the hot tears that start to spill. I crouch down and splash my face with cool water to get rid of the sensation.
It's funny how I only start to realize what a fool I've been when I'm faced with the knowledge that I'm about to be called a fool. Ignorance is bliss, but regret is merciless.
With a loud, cleansing sigh, I stand up. Without another word, I cross the bridge and continue on. Xiusu simply follows me, silent as ever.
I'm grateful for Xiusu. She stands by me without question, no words necessary. Nothing is ever left unsaid when nothing needs to be said.
A feeling of guilt pinches my heart, reminding me of all the words I left unsaid. I didn't even tell Draken where I'm going or when I'll be back. Or anyone else. I'm not exactly sure when… or if I'll be back, but not saying anything weighs on my conscience.
“Gaaaaah, fuck this shit,” I groan, running a hand through my hair. “Xiusu, what goes on in your brain all day? How are you so blank all the time?”
I don't need to turn around to know that Xiusu is looking at me. “Is there a family event?” She asks, which obviously means she doesn't want to talk about what she's thinking.
“I know as much as you do,” I answer with a sigh, and I can't help but start fidgeting with my skirt. “It's probably important if they told me to get my ass home after ignoring my existence for three years.”
“Succession?” Xiusu asks, and I shudder.
“I really hope not. Ruanyue and Qilang have been fighting for the title of heir for years, but nothing will happen unless I step down.” I pause, biting my lip when I realize the alternative.
“Or your father is forcing you to step down,” Xiusu faithfully finishes, saying exactly what I didn't want to think about.
As if perfect timing, a soft tinkling of metal echoes through the mossy forest, and a little pagoda comes into view. The pagoda is built with striking black wood and beautiful violet roof tiles that resembled lotus petals. In the center of the pagodas’s stone floor, beneath a delicate silver wind chime that hangs from the ceiling, a nine-petaled lotus is carved to be the base of a small stone structure with a bowl shaped like a blooming lotus flower. The bowl is filled with crystal clear water that didn't so much as ripple, even though a breeze causes the lavender gauze curtains around the pagoda's open walls to sway. The pagoda sits at the edge of a river that’s equally still, with a pier made of the same sleek black wood stretching a short distance away from the shore.
I approach the bowl of water and place my hand on the surface, and immediately the water turns black.
At the end of the pier, a ghastly wall of water rises up and forms a swirling vortex of the same black water, emitting a dull blue glow. It looks far more menacing than it actually is - my father's magic, to ward off unwanted guests with a weak resolve.
My resolve is starting to sputter out.
I step down from the pagoda, rejoining Xiusu, who waits by the pier. “Don't throw up this time,” I tease, earning myself a glare.
“I wasn't made to swim in watery wormholes.”
Xiusu's retort makes me laugh, a spark of joy amidst my growing sense of unease. “Sounds like a skill issue,” I reply. I could swear I catch a glimpse of a smirk from Xiusu.
I take the lead, walking to the end of the pier. I take a deep breath, square my shoulders, and step off the edge into the pitch black waters.