Archive of Our Own

“I’ll always be grateful for your friendship, Zen.” 

Shirayuki’s voice carries beyond the doors to Zen’s office, where Obi has been eavesdropping for the past twenty minutes, having a silent meltdown. 

This wasn’t the encouraging talk they’d spoken about when they talked about coming home from Lyrias, victorious in their task. And it certainly wasn’t the smooth proposal that they’d all expected from Zen for years.  

Peaking through the gap in the doors, Obi watched his two best friends – who had only had eyes for each other in the whole time he’d known them – shake hands. Like it was the end of an arrangement, a business deal, and they were parting as dear colleagues. 

There were no tears, there was no begging; those two were always very good at holding strong so that no one else would worry. 

Yet, it still felt as if the whole interaction was planned, and everyone had seen it coming except for Obi.

Mitsuhide came along with a stack full of papers, and startled Obi from watching the most startlingly passionless breakup he’d ever witnessed.

“Hey Obi.” He put a hand on the door to open it and then realized the suspicious look on Obi’s face. “Are you eavesdropping again? I thought we were past this –”

Obi set a hand on Mitsuhide’s arm, slowly removing it from the door. Mitsuhide only looked at Obi in confusion.

“Obi?”

In the next moment, Shirayuki walked out of the office, head held high and a smile on her face. The smile disappeared with a start; clearly she had expected to walk into an empty hallway.

“Oh, hi Obi, Mitsuhide.” She looked between the two of them, picking up on the strange air in the hallway. “Um, did I interrupt something?”

Mitsuhide didn’t seem to know how to respond to that, which was fine with Obi. He plastered a smile on his face and held out an arm.

“Of course not, Miss. I figured I’d come and escort you to lunch?” He did his best to filter the shock, confusion and frustration out of his voice. He needed answers, but he also needed time to process.

She smiled on a sigh, probably eased by the familiarity of their little routine.

She took his arm. “I would love that.”

Later that night, after Obi had grilled Shirayuki at lunch and earned himself more frustration at the whole situation than closure – How can it just be over? Didn’t we wait years for this? You’re really alright with this? – he got summoned to Zen’s quarters. He considered not going at all; he was too angry that Zen had so effortlessly let go the woman of both their dreams with seemingly no notice, even if Shirayuki had insisted that this ending had been a long time coming.

Still, whether out of some strangely newfound sense of duty, the guilt of a friend, or force of habit, Obi went to Zen. 

“Obiiiiii!” Zen hiccuped, red-faced and giggling. “You’re – you’re here. ”

Mitsuhide sat next to Zen on the wood flooring, a mostly empty bottle between them, nursing what was probably his first drink. Mitsuhide always kept his wits about him when Zen decided to throw back a few drinks.

And Zen was wasted . 

Resigned, Obi sat down, completing the awkward triangle, and poured the rest of the bottle into the last empty glass. Then he downed it in a single gulp.

“Master, you summoned me. And it looks like you guys started the party well before I got here, eh, Mister?”

Mitsuhide shrugged, and pulled another bottle from behind his back. “I’m guessing you know?”

“Yup.” Obi said, putting extra pop on the word, drowning the bitter feeling by refilling his glass. Unfortunately, it would take more than two to get him to the level Zen was floating at.

“I’m not upset. I am totally okay .” Zen leaned forward, hands on his knees and as serious as his blood alcohol level would allow.

“So I heard.” Obi stared hard into the amber liquid in his glass, trying not to vent his frustrations on his obviously drunk friend. 

“Shirayuki and I… we’ll be okay,” Zen continued, “it’s just… so sad.” His eyes watered up, and Obi was almost startled out of the angry cocktail of emotions brewing in his chest. He’d never seen Zen cry. Not when Shirayuki had been kidnapped, not after the battle where the three of them had nearly met their deaths. Obi hadn’t expected the first time to be over drinks after a breakup that Zen was supposedly ‘very okay’ with.

“First, Kiki gets married.” Zen held up one finger, starting a list. “Now, things with Shirayuki will be… different.” He held up another finger.

“Kiki still visits all the time,” Mitsuhide reassured him, at the same time that Obi gritted out, “That was your own decision.” 

Mitsuhide shot Obi a look , but Obi couldn't bring himself to care and Zen kept talking as if neither of them had spoken.

“And soon enough, Mitsuhide, will get married and leave too, and nothing w-will ever be the s-same,” Zen lamented through his tears. Mitsuhide gently scoffed at that.

“Zen, I’m not going anywhere anytime soon.”

Zen, in his drunken stupor, scooted over on the floor until he was leaning on Obi’s shoulder. “At least I’ll always have you, Obi.”

Mitsuhide rolled his eyes, but Obi tensed up. He looked down at snow-white hair now covering his shoulder, and was hit with the memory of a different night over drinks with Zen.

I have faith in myself, and in my friends. Even in you, Obi.

Suddenly, the cocktail of angry emotions turned into a twisting in his stomach, and Obi wasn’t sure which felt worse. 

“Yeah, Master,” Obi slowly reached up, patting Zen once on the back. He locked eyes with Mitsuhide, and something passed between them. A shared weight. An understanding.

“You’ll always have me.”

And then Kihal told Shirayuki about developing feelings for a certain second Prince, which Shirayuki met with excitement. Obi only felt wary of the new development. He would be giving out no advice or encouragement, this time around.

And then Shirayuki discovered the location of a rare plant, and left on her own adventure to Yuri island with the King’s permission.

But Zen would always have Obi.

“Miss, don’t leave.”

Obi grabbed her hands in his, pulling them up to his chest, to his heart.

“I want you to stay.” He implored, giving her the pleading look that always pulled her away from her work in the greenhouse for a rest, or food, or whatever need she was neglecting in habit of taking better care of plants than of herself. “Please.”

Just before he could bend a knee and start the waterworks, she pulled him into a tight hug.

“Oh, Obi. I could never say no to you!” She pulled away, and cupped his face in her warm hands. He nuzzled his face in her palm like a cat, safe and content. “Of course I’ll stay.”

“Great. It’s settled then.” He stated, nodding. “Nothing has to change.”

“Exactly.” Miss laughed, music to his ears, before a break in the melody tilted his world and set him off balance. 

“But wait, what about the status update from Laxdo?” Miss’s voice sounded all wrong.

“What?” Obi blinked.

“I said,” Zen repeated, exasperated, “what about the Laxdo update?”

Oh. Obi looked around, regaining his sense of awareness. He was back in Zen’s office, in Wistal Castle, giving his Monday report. Kihal and Mitsuhide were standing by, pitying looks on their faces, as Obi had clearly been drifting off again. 

“Right. They’re doing fine. They say hello. Nothing new to report.” Obi said blankly. Zen nodded, writing something down, and Obi took it as a dismissal, floating out of the room.

“He’s slipping.” Kihal said, looking at Zen disapprovingly. Mitsuhide filled her in on the night that started it all, Zen’s pity party that prompted steadfast Obi into making a vow that was clearly keeping him in limbo, a hollow shell of the man he used to be.

Mitsuhide went to Zen’s desk to collect some of the dossiers that needed returning to their rightful archives. “Technically, he delivered the report.” Kihal didn’t need to see his face to hear the grimace in his tone.

“He spaced out during a meeting,” Zen said defensibly. “He'll bounce back.”

Kihal narrowed her eyes at him, knowing her thoughtful Prince was in there somewhere, buried behind layers of stubbornness. She stayed out of it for the most part, because it was really between Zen and Obi.

Still , Kihal thought to herself, they’re both fools.

Obi was assembling some sandwiches in the castle kitchen when he remembered a time in Lyrias that lil’ Ryuu and the Miss had brought him lunch.

It was snowing, and Obi had night guard duty for the eighth night in a row after a non-plant related flu had taken out a couple of the regular staff. Obi walked across the stone wall in Lyrias, doing his rounds, wishing the wind would give his lungs a rest from the cold gusts of air, when he heard Shirayuki call his name from the stairwell.

He’d raced over, his face pulling into a grin just at the sight of them, and they’d handed him a mug of piping hot soup.

“We know you got pulled out of dinner for this shift,” Shirayuki explained excitedly, “so we brought some food to warm you up.”

“And because you always do it for us.” Ryuu’s soft voice and smile made Obi’s heart twinge. He’d ruffled Ryuu’s hair then, and accepted the soup from Shirayuki. They’d spent his short dinner break catching up and laughing when it began to snow into the last of his soup.

Still smiling at the memory, Obi picked up the sandwiches, and made his way up to the Herbalist’s offices.

Garrack was looking over the latest research sent from Lyrias, poring over notes from the herbalists there, when Obi busted into the office, holding a platter of sandwiches and grinning like he was looking for trouble. He looked around the office, finding it empty except for garrack, and she watched a strange expression wash over his face before it went completely blank. He tried to smile again, but it looked a bit pained.

“Ah, just the woman I wanted to see.” He recovered smoothly.

She was not the woman he wanted to see.

Obi had clearly forgotten that Shirayuki was gone, and had come to bring her lunch. He did it so often that there really was no saving the cover up, but Garrack had the grace not to comment on it.

“A handsome knight appears to personally bring me lunch? Lucky me.” Garrack winked, and Obi relaxed immediately, settling into the chair opposite her at the desk. 

They tucked into lunch, enjoying each others’ company and some light conversation, when Garrack tried to make the most of Obi’s impromptu return.

“You know, with both of my star apprentices gone, I sure could use an extra hand with inventory today.” Garrack looked at him knowingly, containing her smile by taking a sip from her drink. “If you’ve got time, that is.”

“I’ve got some time,” Obi admitted, “though I don’t know how much help I’ll be.”

“That might fool Shidan and Suzu, but it won’t work on me.” Garrack leaned back in her chair and folded her arms, confident in the knowledge that Obi had unintentionally shadowed two brilliant herbalists for the better part of five years.

Obi, knowing when he’d been outmaneuvered, conceded. He walked over to the work counters and pulled out the checklist from its drawer, starting the log.

Garrack smiled to herself. Obi was loyal to a fault. She knew that it was only a matter of time before things worked themselves out. Until then, well, she certainly didn’t mind the assistance.  

Obi tossed and turned in his bed, restless. His dreams were filled with his Miss leaving him, getting on a boat and never turning back.

Goodbye, Obi , she’d say. I hope you find happiness one day .

I won’t, he would beg, falling to his knees in the sand. Not without you.

Nothing he did could make her stay. None of it was the warm hug she’d given him in reality, saying she would be back in a few weeks. That she’d see him again soon. Still, the dreams hounded his subconscious, and it was starting to affect his sanity.

He rolled out of bed and plodded over to Zen’s room. The cold floor was comforting in that it pulled him a bit more into the waking world, and he slipped into the bedroom with the spare key he’d been given for emergencies.

Zen, hearing the door open, half-sat up and rubbed at his eyes. “Obi? Did something happen?”

Obi chuckled, self-deprecating. “Nothing worth getting worked up over.” He loitered near the entryway, picking at his nails. Things between them hadn’t been the same since the breakup. That didn’t mean that he didn’t miss the way things were.

He’d come to terms with his anger for Zen, and even forgiven him. If they both said that the breakup was fine, then it was fine. He’d seen Shirayuki leave with a genuine smile, and Zen was slowly courting Kihal in his awkward, Zen way. Still, Obi meant what he’d said. Zen had trusted him before anyone else, and Obi wouldn’t turn his back on a friend in need.  

He looked up and found Zen staring at him, eyes squinting. Clearly, the Prince was trying very hard to discern Obi’s sudden appearance on very limited brain power. It was pretty late, after all.

“Master, can’t I stay here with you? My room’s feeling awful drafty tonight.” Obi smiled at his own theatrics. It was a line he’d used before, when things were simpler.

“Obi, your room is one of the nicest in the castle.” Zen said, scooting over in bed, not bothering to pull up the blanket because Obi wouldn’t sleep under it anyway. “It’s just as insulated as mine is.”

“You have the fancy heavy blankets, though.” Obi countered, laying on his back and looking up at the canopy roof. “I checked Mister’s room too, we definitely have inferior coverage.”

“Whatever you say, Obi.” Zen acquiesced, rolling onto his side.

Zen tried to settle back into sleep, but his mind wouldn’t settle back into unconsciousness. He rolled onto his back and looked over at Obi, who was still staring up into the darkness with eyes wide open. Zen could guess what he was thinking about. Who he was thinking about. It wasn’t that Zen didn’t know Obi’s feelings. Zen wasn’t even jealous, if he was being honest with himself. He had Kihal in his heart now. It was still new, but she was wonderful, and he was happy.

There had been so much change over the past year, so many risks taken, that Zen couldn’t help holding on to as much normalcy as possible. 

He hadn’t meant to drunkenly force Obi to stay by his side rather than follow Shirayuki into the sunset, but Obi had stayed anyway. Surely, if Obi had wanted to leave, he would have done so.

Right?

Zen stared at Obi long enough that Obi finally turned his head, looking into Zen’s eyes. The deep sadness Zen saw there was a knife in the gut, even as he watched Obi temper it with exhaustion and a yawn. Obi threw one arm over his face and slowed his breathing, attempting sleep once again.

Zen knew he wasn’t going to get any more sleep that night.

He was starting to think that maybe, he really had been in the wrong.

Obi, still not having slept very well, wandered into Zen’s office the next afternoon. Kihal and Zen, who’d been standing awfully close to each other, jumped apart at his arrival. Obi barely registered it, feeling like he was still half-asleep despite his distinct lack of rest the night before.

"Oh, hey Miss K.” Obi’s voice was monotone, which was highly unusual for him. He couldn’t bring himself to change, though. “The flowers in your hair really suit you. Shirayuki used to love those flowers," he sighed.

Zen, who was looking a bit flushed after the interruption, gestured to a seat across from him at his desk. “Take a seat, Obi,” he requested, clearing his throat.

“Shirayuki used to sit there, sometimes,” Obi recalled wistfully, uncaring how he came across anymore.

Zen groaned, running his hands through his hair. Kihal covered her mouth with her hand to hide her amused expression.

“Obi, just go already .” Zen’s face was bright red now.

Obi didn’t understand. “Where, Master?”

“To Shirayuki,” he clarified. Then he looked down at his desk, straightening the stray parchment there. “You’ve been a good friend.”

Zen looked into Obi’s eyes, to ensure he heard the next part. “I’m sorry I took advantage of that.”

Obi’s eyes widened. It was a rare apology, and a sincere one. For all the anger Obi had held in his heart after the breakup, it was a major weight off of his chest to be acknowledged for it. Zen wasn’t perfect by any means, but he appreciated his friends. He loved Obi enough to let him go.

Obi wanted to hug him, slap him on the back, and take off running for the port, all at the same time. Instead, he reached for an old classic.

Teasing Zen.

“Why, Master, you wouldn’t be trying to get rid of me in order to squeeze in more alone time with Miss K, would you?”

They both reddened, at that.

“Obi, on second thought, I need you to run a letter for me to Lord Eisetsu –”

“Just kidding, Master!” Obi called, halfway out the door already. “I’ll tell her you both said hello!”

He sprinted to the docks, flashed his identification tag and borrowed the most efficient dinghy he could man by himself.

He was going to find Shirayuki.

Obi docked on the island marked on his map. He’d asked Kihal and Shirayuki to draw him an extra one, just in case. Good thing, too, or it would’ve taken that much longer for him to set out.

It was still daytime when he made it to the island, but time was of the essence if he wanted to track her down before night fell. Luckily he was able to see her boat from where it was docked just down the beach from where he’d landed. It wouldn’t be easy to look for footprints on a sandy beach, so he made quick work of dropping anchor, as it were, and trudging into the forest.

He followed the cracked branches and crushed leaves, finding a piece of charcoal lost on the forest floor and knowing he was on the right track. It took him two hours of racing through the trees until he saw her bag in the distance, abandoned in the tall trees. A slight panic took over, the part of him that’s waited, dormant, since their reunion in Tanbarun. He looked around frantically, wondering what could have caused her to wander so far from her supplies. If it was really her choice at all.

Eventually, he decided it was worth spooking her if he could confirm her safety. “Miss?” He called out, echoing into the forest.

“Obi?”

The voice came from above him, and it startled him a bit. He looked up at the branches and saw a shock of red amongst all the green. 

The sharp crack had his body moving before his mind could register the consequences. He ran to the tree she was sitting in just as the branch holding her aloft snapped at the base and dropped. The branch swung back, hanging to the tree by a thread, but Shirayuki was a victim of gravity.

She yelped as she was dropped out of the air, and she landed in Obi’s awaiting arms with a gasp, the air leaving both of them from the impact. It was enough to send Obi tumbling down to one knee, just to keep them both from hitting the ground.

“Obi.” She looked up at him with relief. “ Thank you. I had just seen a type of fruit in that tree that we don’t have back home, and – well, I thought I could pick it…” 

They both looked up at the tree, fully realizing the height that Shirayuki had climbed. It had to be at least nine, nearly ten feet off the ground. If Obi hadn’t been there…

He looked back down at her emerald eyes and looked as surprised as she did that they were misting with tears. He fully sat down, and she crawled out of his hold, kneeling to face him.

“I just –” she started, choking up a little. She collected herself enough to smile at him with the full force of the sun, and Obi was understandably blinded. “I was really hoping you would come.”

Obi couldn’t help it, laughter burst out of him, finally relieved to be right where he wanted to be all along, and Shirayuki joined him, laughing until they both had tears in their eyes.

Once they both had calmed down enough to breathe normally, he pulled her into a tight hug, and she returned it just as strongly.

“Oh Miss,” he sighed happily, “don’t you worry. I don’t plan to ever let you go again.”