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Jax sat holding your hand as the machines around him whirred and beeped. A relentless tidal wave of noise that barely quieted the storm in his mind. Lucky. Unser had said you were lucky to have been seen in the dark. Tara had said you were lucky to have made it through multiple surgeries. Chibs had said you were lucky the prospect had not followed orders. Did lucky to be alive mean anything if you never woke up? Jax wondered to himself as he looed at the machines helping keep you going.
Everyone kept telling him to go home and let someone else keep watch. He couldn't leave your side though. He needed answers and you were the only one who could give them to him. He was suppose to keep you safe. As much as you were lucky he was that much a failure as your big brother.
He knew your injuries were more than Tara was letting on. He had seen and heard hushed whispers between her and your guys mom. He couldn't bring himself to ask though just like they couldn't bring themselves to tell him. Those two were not the only one with secrets. Opie was also torn up about you but Jax had little sympathy since he had caught him banging a crow eater when he went to tell him you had been taken to the hospital. Going completely down the rabbit hole now Jax wished he had never given his stamp of approval for you two. Opie had never gotten over Donnas death and he had never been able to keep it in his pants. You deserved better. If you woke up Jax would see to it that you two were done.
A knock at the door drew his attention as Chibs stepped in with Juice on his heel. "Come with me Jackie. Juice has got tonight's watch and Tig is outside with the prospect." stated Chibs as Juice took the other seat in the room. "I'm good" stated Jax waving them off. "That was an order" stated Chibs firmly as he grabbed Jax's arm lifting him up.
Once Chibs had gotten Jax out of the room Juice moved his chair closer and took your had. "Please wake up. I can't live without you" he murmured as tears prickled at his eyes as he kissed your ice cold hand.