Work Text:
KarKay Insecurities
Preface
Let me just start by saying I noticed two major insecurities that Kayden and Kartein have. For Kayden, he is cautious about his perception and image regarding power. For Kartein, he is cautious about who can claim a relationship to him and his ability to do genuinely kind deeds
One
Kayden’s image and perception. Three distinct moments jump out at me for Kayden here. One, when he says to Jiwoo that he beat up people in order to show the world that he is still strong (181, 214). Two, when he had that particular smile in front of Jiwoo before suffering in the basement to do force control (262). Three, Kayden being quite angry at Pluton for saying he wouldn't fight (277).
All three instances show that Kayden is actually very cautious about how people perceive him regarding strength. Everyone mentioned in those points has to see him as strong and Kayden goes to great lengths to maintain that image (fighting people, smiling through pain in front of Jiwoo, explosively ranting at Pluton). He cannot afford to be weak in these moments, and he shows that he actually does consider perception as part of strength. If he only thought raw power was needed to maintain image, he wouldn't have cared about perception
Two
Kartien's relationships and kindness. Two moments jump at me for Kartein, but there are definitely more scattered throughout the comic. One, when Kartein claims Jiwoo as his patient, rather than allowing someone to say that he is Jiwoo's physician (even though it's the same thing) (228). Two, when Kartein literally seems to blame cat poop for going off to help Subin’s grandpa (also 228).
At first, Kartein is only willing to associate with Jiwoo and Kayden on a professional basis for a decent price (healing Jiwoo in exchange for a new force method). But as we go along in the comic, he increasingly finds more flimsy excuses to be kind (cat poop my dude…) and more wonky ways to ensure that he is in control of a relationship with someone (Jiwoo must be his patient, not him being Jiwoo's physician).
Kartein is quite ridiculous in his lengths to cover up genuine care for people, but he does so anyways regardless of how foolish he looks. I think it's interesting how he feels the absolute need to control his relationships to someone
Three
But Kartein notices Kayden’s insecurity. When Kayden went down to the basement, Jiwoo seemed to take the reply at face value, but Kartein was the one who really noticed (262). His expressions tell the story, he knows something is up with Kayden, that he is very very injured.
Unfortunately Kartein doesn't do too much about it, I just think it's interesting that he did notice. That Kayden panel really breaks my heart though, I wish Kartein did more (but helping him would interfere with his relationship insecurity for sure). There's also the time during WAA (214) where Kartein asks why Kayden fought. He agreed that Kayden did the right thing to preserve his image
Four
And Kayden also seems to notice Kartein's insecurity. I know it's framed as a joke when Kayden makes the script with Jiwoo to convince Kartein to heal the grandpa (228). But that hides the fact Kayden is actually helping Kartein by giving him an excuse to be kind. For example, in the beginning Kayden used the same taunting method to get Kartein to heal Jiwoo's core (138). He taunted Kartein into doing something— this is a genuine taunt during the core healing moment, but I think the implications during the grandpa moment are slightly different.
Although it definitely is a joke on Kayden's end, he is enabling Kartein to do what he actually wants to do. After all, Kartein wouldn't heal the grandpa anyways if he didn't want to. Simple fact. But Kayden gives him an out, gives him an excuse to do kindness. It's a weird understanding of Kartein's weakness in being unable to give kindness freely (Kayden even acknowledges Jiwoo as Kartein’s excuse in 242). So Kayden helps him hack that impulse, allowing Kartein to frame the situation as a challenge to his prowess that must be dealt with, rather than Kartein actually wanting to help others.
I don't think there's such a concrete example of Kayden helping with the relationship aspect, but Kayden doesn't particularly challenge it
Five
There's unfortunately a bit of a difference in those examples regarding willingness to help each other. However I can see a lot of hope for their development, particularly on Kartein's side, after the Astra battle in the 270s. Kayden absolutely proved himself to Kartein there and fought a Top Ten on Kartein's behalf. And Kayden followed solely on the suspicion that Kartein was doing something dangerous when he left Jiwoo's house.
With that sort of proof that he is absolutely under Kayden's protection and within his inner circle, I think Kartein would be a lot more willing to help Kayden directly in the future (beyond the literal life and death healing moment in 273). Or at least with another flimsy cat shit excuse I guess
Personal Rant
I wanted to make a fic based on the insecurities I mentioned here but idk if I will ever muster the brainpower, so I ranted instead. Gosh, they could actually be so sweet on each other if they developed a bitttttt more in the trust direction and improved their communication.
Like just imagine Kartein helping Kayden out in another basement equivalent scene and reassuring him. And Kayden much more obviously allowing Kartein to express his kindness, without judgment or expectation. They could actually be so soft on each other and I swear I will write more of what I think they could be if that happened (cough my soft fics are them doing just that).
THEY ARE PAINFULLY SWEET, I WILL SHOW THE WORLD *shakes fist*