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You're A Mean One, Mister Kirk

Summary:

Kirk is in the mood to settle in and start his holiday season by watching a Christmas classic with his fiancée, who has never seen "It's A Wonderful Life." Of course, he doesn't tell her what the movie's about...because where would the fun be in that?

Notes:

So this is a combination Christmas present/donation fic for my friend sideofrawr as well as the first fic in my self-imposed Christmas Fic Countdown where I'm going to try and write twenty-four Christmas fic, one for each day leading up to Christmas. This particular fic is part of the series I have for her inspired by our roleplay versions of these characters. The prompt for this one was "'it’s a wonderful life’ aww it sounds so cute babe sure we can watch it! *30 mins later* “YOU MONSTER""

Work Text:

Christmas was…complicated…for him these days, ever since he’d been pulled to this universe by the Seal. The very first Christmas here, he’d been through the Apocalypse. The lead up to it had been pretty awful, to be honest; there’d been the bombing at the original Complex, and the head games that Lucifer had played with all of them, and it had been a pretty bleak and depressing time. No one had felt like celebrating, and he’d pretty much gotten the hell out of Lawrence the first chance he’d gotten, gone to Europe and done the job of corporate spy, made the money that had done him well when he got back.

The next year…it was a mixed bag. He’d lost some good friends around Thanksgiving, unfortunately. The Seal had just picked up a whole handful of those he was close to and took them back. But Christmas itself hadn’t been too bad. He’d still had friends, still had people there who cared. And the wish baubles had been nice; at least for a little while, he’d had his things from his home in San Francisco at Greaves House. It had been nice.

Of course, all good things come to an end.

The beginning of February, there seemed to be a mass exodus and the Seal took more people than he had seen it take in a long time. He’d lost so many good friends then. It almost seemed like it wasn’t worth moving forward at that point. And then, when things finally seemed okay, there had been the earthquake that had decimated the apartment complex and the youth center, the two places in Lawrence he felt most at home. He was almost thankful when he got picked up out of Lawrence and tossed in New Orleans, to be honest.

Because thankfully, for once, he wasn’t tossed there alone.

Rose had come back with him, and Bones and Molly, and Regina and Robin, and Zane and Clara…seemed a lot of people he was friends with in Lawrence had been picked up and swept out with him. They’d all landed at different points in time; some had been there longer than others, never sure when their friends would arrive, if their friends would arrive, and whether it would be friends from home or friends from Lawrence or wherever, but somehow all of them had kept their sanity and made it through all right.

And now it was Christmas again, and he supposed this year was a better one. This year almost his whole damn crew was with him, for a start: not just Bones now, but Sulu and Carol and Spock and Uhura as well. All of them had been swept up by whatever had dragged him to NOLA and they were there now and as much as it was hard not being home it was good to have them close. They were his family, after all, and over the last few years of being here, away from them, he’d missed them more than they ever realized.

Not only that, but he had a woman in his life who he loved, who was crazy enough to agree to marry him, who, by some miracle they still hadn’t found a way to explain, was carrying his children. Children. That…that was taking some getting used to, the fact that they were having twins. One kid was already going to be a handful, they’d figured, considering Rose was a dhampir, but two? He was already kind of dreading it, in a way. He had no idea if they were going to have any of their mother’s abilities or not. This was a whole new ballgame for all of them. But that was something that could wait until they were born.

Right now it was the first of December and that meant it was officially Christmas season and that meant it was time to torment his fiancée with an extensive list of Christmas movies to watch. He knew there were a ton he’d seen that hadn’t even been made yet so he’d just have to settle with all the ones that had come out already plus the ones in theaters now. He patted the space next to him on the sofa and Rose eyed him warily. “You look way too excited,” she said.

“Because we’re starting off with a classic,” he said with a grin, putting an arm around her shoulders. There was a huge bowl of popcorn between them. He figured he’d get two handfuls, tops, and Rose would eat the rest. She was barely putting on any extra weight and yet was eating at least three times as much as she normally did. He had asked Molly if that was normal but Molly had said she honestly had no clue as this was the first dhampir pregnancy she’d ever heard of and she couldn’t find anything to help her figure out what to expect. So he was assuming it was normal unless Rose started complaining she was hungry all the time. “Everyone should see ‘It’s A Wonderful Life’ at least once.”

“So it’s a good movie?” Rose asked, snuggling in next to Kirk a little.

“The best,” he said. “It’s about an angel named Clarence who hasn’t gotten his wings and how he helps a man named George on Christmas.”

“That sounds kind of cute,” she said. Then she looked at the DVD cover and made a slight face. “This is one of those old movies you like, isn’t it?”

“Hey, don’t knock the classics,” he said, taking the case from her and pressing a kiss in her hair.

“You and your ‘classics,’” she said.

“Rose, everything in this era is a classic,” he said.

“That’s because you’re an old, old man,” she said with a smirk.

Kirk shook his head. “I am not that old. And it’s not because I’m older than you, it’s because I was born in the future.”

“Nope, it’s because you’re a cradle robber,” she teased, looking up at him.

“Well, what does it say that you agreed to marry me, hmm?” he said, raising an eyebrow and nodding to the engagement ring on her left hand.

She opened her mouth to say something and then paused. “If I say something about how you’re rich or good in the sack that just makes me look really sleazy, right?”

“Right,” he said with a nod.

“Then I guess I just have to say it’s because I’m a sucker for a guy in a yellow Command uniform,” she said with a grin.

“Then don’t let me let you around Sulu while he has his on,” he said, leaning in to give her a quick kiss. She kissed him back for a moment before he pulled away. “Movie now.”

“I’d rather do more of that,” she said, playing with the buttons of his shirt.

“Movie first, making out afterward,” he said with a cheeky grin.

“Movie first, making out during?” she asked.

He considered it. “Maybe.”

“Deal,” she said with a nod before settling into her seat, turning towards the television. He picked up the remote and turned the movie on. He got his first handful of popcorn during the previews, and his second as the movie started. He was about to go in for a third about a half hour into the movie when he felt the bowl be moved away from him and he looked over to see Rose scowling at him. “Jim, you’re an ass.”

“What’d I do?” he asked.

“This movie is sad!” she said.

Kirk blinked. “Did you not know that?” he asked.

She sat up and punched at his shoulder. She must have been at least a little more irritated than she was letting on because it actually hurt quite a bit. She didn’t hold back as much as usual. “No! I didn’t! George gets shit on so much. How is this a ‘classic Christmas movie’? It’s so….depressing!”

“It gets better,” he said, reaching over for her. She let him, grudgingly, and she was stiff. “See, Clarence shows him what the world would be like if he didn’t exist, if he’d never been born. And it’s not pleasant. But it’s what George needs to see. So he decides he wants to live, and Clarence rights everything, and then when he goes home he finds out that the townspeople all gave whatever they could to help him, and then Sam Wainwright sends a telegram saying he’ll cover the debt. And then, in the very last scene, a bell on the Christmas tree rings, and George knows that means Clarence got his wings.”

Rose sniffed just slightly at that. “So it gets better?” she asked.

“Yeah, it gets better,” he said. “But we don’t have to finish it. I keep forgetting you…”

“Have mood swings that come out of nowhere like a Mac truck?” she said..

“Yeah.” He paused. “You can spend the rest of the month mocking me for being overly sentimental if you finish it, though. I promise.”

“I can?” she said, brightening.

He nodded. “Absolutely. I may even pretend to shed a tear. Bones would get a kick out of that.”

That got a laugh out of her. “Fine. But how do I know it’s fake?”

“Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t,” he teased. “You’ll just have to take my word for it.” She shook her head and snuggled into him more before turning her attention back to the TV again. He probably should have warned her, but…nah, he thought to himself. It was more fun this way. After all, he was a man who liked to live dangerously sometimes.

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