Work Text:
Wolves Skin
A. N. Marie
His eyes flooded with tears as his knuckles burned. His face flushed and red with a fiery fury as he pounded his fists into a face that he knew wasn't deserving of it. Their mouth filled up with crimson as they hiccupped at each agonizing blow to their stomach, and choked on their fluids. He stopped hitting them to look at what he'd done to this human. This specimen who was simply born into the world without consent. Who just wanted to walk upon these cruel monsters we call people and be normal. They smiled up at him, their teeth glossy with blood as even more of it trickled down to the sides of their face and to the corners of their ears. God, he hated how their smile sent electric waves through his stomach and heated his cheeks. He pounded their head into the wet pavement. His throat was bubbly with sobs as he managed a sentence barely audible over the thunderstorm.
"Don't fucking.. smile at me…"
He knew somewhere deep inside of him he wanted to see it again. To frame it on his blank walls and stare at it until the butterflies made him sick. They gave him a single breathless laugh. Their soft skin swelled up with rainbow bruises.
"I would hug you but,"
They coughed up more blood, making it fountain down their cheeks and mix with the freshwater on the sidewalk.
"I'm in a lot of pain…"
He wanted to pick them up and carry them home. Apologize for everything he'd ever done to this innocent person who didn't deserve a monster as cruel as him. Who could've fallen for anyone but him. But no matter how hard they tried, no matter how well they tried to hide in the crowd of monsters and act like they were one of them, like they were normal, they just weren't. They were a sheep amongst wolves, attempting a disguise that was slowly, slowly, beginning to fail. They were beginning to stick out like a sore thumb.
He wanted to cover their fragile body with kisses instead of hits. But God knows what those monsters would do to him if they knew he was just as much of an outcast as they were. He was a sheep that had figured out how to wear a wolf’s skin instead of draping a blanket over himself and walking about. They observed the utter guilt in his eyes.
"Hey. It's okay…"
They croaked, wincing at the sharp pain in their left rib and stomach. He broke down at these three weak words, wailing with tears as he muttered random incoherent words under his quivering breath. Nothing was okay. They reached up to touch his cheek, which was quickly slapped away with a quick, "No!"
His hands found their shoulders as he shook them violently.
"WHY CAN'T YOU BE LIKE THEM!?"
They found tears streaming from their own eyes, and they couldn't possibly tell if it was from their pain, or because they were genuinely sad that they just couldn't get him to accept himself for who he was, and wanted to be.
"I'm s-sorry,"
"SHUT UP!"
Their head was pushed into the cement once more, this time almost inking their eyes in black. He squeezed the sides of their face after they yelped out in pure pain. Unable to hold himself back from muttering multiple apologies, he leaned down to kiss their dry, cracked, lips. His taste buds jumped at the taste of copper, salty tears, and saliva. He pressed his forehead to theirs as he wept. He mumbled more shaky and scared words into their ears.
"You don't deserve me, you don't deserve me, you don't deserve me, you don't deserve me,"
"S-stop that-"
"You're dying in my arms, your blood is on my hands! Please! Go love someone else! Marry a nice girl! Have kids for all I care!"
"But I want you.."
"I'm not a girl. It's not supposed to be like this!"
Their fingers gripped his shirt and pulled him into their chest as he cried, letting the now trickling rain wash away the blood on their face as they stared up at the sky that was finally beginning to clear. The stars glow in their natural glow, simply complimenting the bright full moon.
"Th- the moon is beautiful.. isn't it?"
He was still sobbing into the crook of their bloody neck, washing the red away with his tears as he hugged the small frame underneath him. Their breath was shallow and dry. Almost calm. His crying slowed as his head raised to observe the sky, and then back down to their face. Which was now destroyed. They smiled again. This time, he smiled back. That night was wretched. But not as painful as the day their family found out they were not one of them, and only a noose could save them from being eaten alive.
“The moon is beautiful, isn't it?” is a more poetic way of saying I love you in the Japanese language.