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Love is not something Yuuta excels at. All that’s happened with Rika, as much as he adored her, has left him broken. Or maybe he’s been broken from the start, Yuuta wonders, considering he’s the one that cursed her. Point is, any love Yuuta may be capable of is not something healthy. He knows it. Everyone knows it, he thinks. He sees the exasperated way Maki shakes her head whenever he stares at Inumaki a bit too long. The concerned looks Gojo-sensei hides under his bandages and snickers both.
Yuuta is not made for love. Not the good kind anyway.
He tries to fix himself. Just a little. He watches romance movies, mouthing the lines, tasting the words on his tongue. They sit wrong, but Yuuta doesn’t give up. He practices in front of the mirror, listing off everything he loves about his friends, hawk eyes peeled for any kind of budding obsession. It scares him, so Yuuta moves on. He tries his hand at poetry, hoping desperately to lay his fumbling heart to rest there. The results are so pathetic he can’t help but laugh. Obnoxiously, hysterically. Toge catches him burning the papers once, Yuuta too busy wheezing through tears to notice the door opening. Inumaki waits until he catches sight of him and then leaves with a small wave. Yuuta doesn’t move, mortified, for a long time after that. He can’t look Toge in the eye for a week.
I've had time to write a book
About the way you act and look
I haven't got a paragraph
He tries giving out compliments, sincere but forced out nonetheless. He fumbles every time, stumbling halfway, losing his train of thought or insulting someone accidentally. He still has bruises after Maki. He told Panda he’s just a fucking panda, for gods’ sake.
(Fucking amazing, Panda!)
Yuuta hates his brain sometimes. His friends forgive him eventually, but doesn’t that just prove his point? His love can only hurt.
(He tries confining in Inumaki once. Needless to say, he doesn’t succeed there either)
So yeah, Yuuta isn’t made for love. That doesn’t stop his stupid heart from loving anyway. It’s just that… his friends are so amazing… Inumaki is so amazing. Yuuta never thought he could love anyone after Rika, and Toge is nothing like her. Though, to be fair, Yuuta doesn’t remember much what she was like anymore. Just the adorable, overbearing, overprotective curse she became. Curse that he made her. Compared to that, Inumaki is a breath of fresh air. He’s smart and funny, and quite mischievous. Determined, but in an almost relaxed way. (Which, probably wouldn’t work for anyone else - definitely not Yuuta.) Strong…and so so pretty. Yuuta could look at him for hours and not get tired.
He probably shouldn’t, considering he’s supposed to be doing something. He just doesn’t remember what.
He gets a spit-second warning in form of a slightly alarmed “Yuuta!” from Panda before the volleyball hits him in the face. He stumbles down on his ass from the force, the ball cheerily rolling away as Maki’s self-satisfied “heh” rings in his ears.
Panda flails his arms angrily in the corner of his eye, “Come on, Okkotsu! I picked you so we’d win!”
Yuuta blinks.
“Shake?” comes from the other side of the court. It’s quiet, but they’re all more than used to straining for Inumaki’s voice.
“I’m fine,” Yuuta says. Blood drips from his nose. He heals it.
“Then get up and fight!”
Laughing under his breath, Yuuta obediently gets up. Maki’s competitive streak never fails to amaze him. He steals one more long look at Inumaki (flushed, smiling, wiping-his-face-with-his-shirt-hhh-tummy-Inumaki) and promises to get his head in the game.
I'm not a man of poetry
Music isn't one with me
It runs from me
They manage to play half of the next set before Gojo-sensei interrupts them, thus saving Yuuta’s team from a spectacular loss. It’s like he knows.
“Yuutaaa! Toge! Mission~!” he calls, not leaving space for a single breath before he barrels on. They all gather round, shamelessly listening to the details Maki and Panda have no business knowing. Gojo should probably reprimand them; he doesn’t.
The mission seems like an easy one. Either one of them should be enough to handle it. But Yuuta’s been on quite a few missions already; nine times out of then they’re mislabeled, grades assigned on a seemingly random basis. And so Gojo never sends them alone if he can help it. ’After all, some things should be enjoyed with friends,’ he says. Yuuta wouldn’t call exorcisms enjoyable but… it’s true having Toge there helps.
(Sometimes, Yuuta thinks, sensei is projecting on them a bit. As the strongest he must’ve gone on a lot of solo missions… is that why?)
They get ready quickly, sliding into Ijichi’s car within 30 minutes, clutching a water bottle (Yuuta) and mouth stuffed with onigiri (Toge). Their shoulders touch as they check the map on Inumaki’s phone. Unthinking, Yuuta cocks his head closer, mouth opening without his input, eyes still trained on the screen. He doesn’t see Toge blink at him, nor the soft blush that rises to his cheeks. He barely registers the onigiri being pressed to his lips. Only realizes he’s taken a bite when spicy tuna bursts on his tongue. Yuuta rears back, all but pressing himself into the door as he hastily swallows. He stammers out an explanation (he wasn’t thinking, he got distracted), hesitates, starts over and eventually just hangs his head in embarrassment. He tries not to think about Toge readily sharing his food, uncaring of the saliva they must’ve swapped; but he can still feel an angry blush overtaking his face. He stays like that, mortified, until a finger pokes his flaming cheek.
(It’s sweet of Inumaki to give Yuuta a second to calm himself, even if it’s not nearly enough time)
And now, I'd like to make a speech
About the love that touches each
But stumbling, I would make you laugh
Yuuta raises his head to see Inumaki’s crinkled in a smile, mouth full once again. “I’m sorry,” he says, getting a soft headshake in response.
’Good?’, Toge signs.
“So good,” Yuuta admits with a nervous smile. Inumaki grins around the snack, swallowing quickly. Then he shoves the onigiri right back into Yuuta’s space, a mischievous glint in his eyes as he puts his free arm on Yuuta’s thigh. His skin prickles at the contact even through the fabric of his uniform. A surprised noise gets stuck in Yuuta’s throat; he swallows it back down. Nothing’s happening. Inumaki simply overbalanced, that’s all. Instead of commenting, Yuuta eyes the onigiri like it’s going to bite him. It very well might, with all this situation is doing to him. If Yuuta didn’t know better, he’d say Toge figured out his crush and was teasing him on purpose. But for all his love of pranks, he would never be cruel on purpose. That much Yuuta is sure of.
Inumaki huffs at his hesitance. Obediently, Yuuta takes a bite. As if there was ever any other option.