Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

haiii! before we start spying on the gays, these are a few important notes before we start:

• I do not see Toya (or Kanade) as a Tenma (most of the fandom views toyakasa as brothers; they're taking that headcanon too seriously that they think toyakasa is incest)

•SHIPS INCLUDED (if you did not read the tags)
-of course, polytasia (shush i'm their ceo, and most of the chapters will include this ship cuz yes)
-mizuena and kanamafu
-minoharu and shizuai
-ichisaki and honashiho
-anhane and emunene
-kaimei and lukamiku (THEY DONT HAVE AGES PLEASE-)
-and probably polyneed?

•cussing here will come to the point where it's dirty lol

•most of these are probably inspired by events at my school

•have fun!

Chapter Text

THE HELLHOLE

•active now

Hatsune Miku added Hoshino Ichika, Hanasato Minori, and 23 others to the group

February 06, 2023, 18:00 PM

miku: hola amigos

rin: holy shit

rin: miku can speak spanish?

miku: no

len: then how did you say that?

miku: i hear it a lot

an: MABUHAY SA LAHAT

kohane: what

mizuki: what

an: oops

an: that's my filipino blood

rui: wait you're half filipino?

an: yes

an: now leave me alone

kanade: what is this for

kanade: damn i hate ppl

mafuyu: i'm a people too

kanade: no

kanade: you're a nice lovely person

mafuyu: oh

akito: ew gay

ena: like you're not

akito: how many times do i have to tell you, i am not gay

toya: huh?

rui: are you sure?

tsukasa: what are you talking about??

akito: ...

mizuki: wait, am i missing something?

an: me

mizuki: ayeeee

mizuki: i miss you

ena: what about me

mizuki: why would i miss you

ena: hey :(

kaito: a few minutes hasn't gone and you're all acting weird

akito: dw rui and tsukasa are weirder

rui: 🥺

tsukasa: 🥺

akito: what the hell

rui: you're pretending you don't know us

tsukasa: we're supposed to be your boyfriends

saki: WHAT

ena: WHAT

mizuki: WHAT

emu: WHAT

an: WHAT

nene: what

kohane: WHAT

tsukasa: i forgot the space bar

tsukasa: it's supposed to be boy friends

saki: liar

tsukasa: no

rui: why would we date him?

rui: he always doesn't like us

an: jealous much?

akito: SHUT UP

ichika: but if he's supposed to be ignoring you two, how did you three become friends

toya: i made him

toya: isn't it?

akito: sigh... yes

shiho: it's nice to be single

😢1

saki: but what about hona

honami: but i exist 😥

shiho: i know

shiho: I thought i blended in completely

kohane: anyways...

kohane: it's almost valentines

emu: I haven't saved anything :(

shizuku: and me

airi: it's your fault stupid

airi: you have a habit of online shopping

shiho: did you know

shiho: you always forgot to leave money at home whenever you buy something

shiho: so you still owe me some yen

shizuku: we're not getting our pay yet :(

shizuku: but i promise to pay you

shiho: you better

miku: what are your plans this valentines?

ena: ??why would we state whatever we're planning

airi: exactly

airi: our valentines are here

mizuki: BUT I WANNA HEAR

ena: ITS SUPPOSED TO BE A SURPRISE DAMNIT

kanade: this is why i hate group chats

seen

FASHIONISTA SQUAD

• active now

KAITO created the group

KAITO added Kagamine Len, Kamishiro Rui, and 3 others to the group

February 06, 2023, 18:36PM

akito: now what the hell is this

len: i told kaito to make a 'boy only' squad

akito: the group name

akito: THE GROUP NAME

akito: WHERE DID IT CAME FROM

tsukasa: it sounds cool :(

akito: i should've known

akito: damnit tenma

rui: baby your pretending you don't know us

toya: correction you're*

rui: it's akito's fault

akito: tf did i do?

rui: you're the reason why I can't think~

akito: ...

akito: anyways tsukasa...

tsukasa: YAY HE'S CALLING ME BY NAME

akito: bcs it's just us here

akito: so earlier, you nearly exposed us

akito: and now ena's banging at my door, asking some questions

akito: i told you to keep it a secret!

tsukasa: i know 🥺

akito: stop using that emoji

akito: it's cringe

toya: but it's cute

(rui replied to akito: i told you to keep it a secret!)

rui: and when you say that, it doesn't mean you'll have to act mean to us

toya: but akito's akito

akito: what

toya: if akito's not acting like akito, then the others will think that he's not akito cause that's not the akito akito is

tsukasa: what the actual fuck

rui: oh...

tsukasa: HOW CAN YOU UNDERSTAND THAT

len: you just don't have brains

akito: wait i thought it's just us here

len: i swear i won't tell anyone

akito: you better

seen

Chapter Text

THE HELLHOLE

• active now

February 07, 2024, 6:00 AM

kanade: morning

nene: morning

mafuyu: morning

meiko: you all sound like robots, why not spice it up a little bit?

tsukasa: GOOD MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS

meiko: ...

nene: ...

mafuyu: what the hell

kanade: what are you doing this early

tsukasa: A STAR IS NEVER LATE FOR HIS CLASSES

mafuyu: did you know that a star also dies?

tsukasa: ...

kanade: did you know

kanade: the benefits of not talking in group chats is that you sleep early and wake up early

mafuyu: aren't you online in nightcord last night?

kanade: there's a difference

kaito: good morning everyone

meiko: morning <3

kaito: <3

meiko: <3

nene: suddenly, i miss emu

mafuyu: gay moments again?

kaito: bold of you to assume that i'm gay

seen

FASHIONISTA SQUAD

• active now

February 07, 2024, 8:42 AM

tsukasa: @Shinonome Akito @Kamishiro Rui @Aoyagi Toya

tsukasa: wake up :(

tsukasa: i'm feeling lonely

tsukasa: oh i wish i found a lover that could hold me

tsukasa: now i'm crying in my room

akito: what the absolute fuck is that

tsukasa: AKITO :D

tsukasa: I MISS YOU SO MUCH :D

akito: we literally see each other at school everyday

tsukasa: where are you baby

akito: don't call me that

akito: i feel weird

tsukasa: but you're a baby

tsukasa: my baby

toya: correction our*

akito: not you too...

tsukasa: TOYA :D

tsukasa: YOU'RE AWAKE

toya: we have class

toya: are you sure it's allowed to use your phones during class?

tsukasa: i'm at the back row

tsukasa: no one can see me

akito: same

tsukasa: @Kamishiro Rui @Kamishiro Rui @Kamishiro Rui @Kamishiro Rui @Kamishiro Rui @Kamishiro Rui 

rui: i'm literally sitting in front of you

tsukasa: why aren't you saying anything :(

rui: i'm listening to the teacher

rui: yet you keep mentioning me

tsukasa: huehue

kaito: if you lovebirds won't stop chatting, the teacher might confiscate your phones

seen

THE HELLHOLE

• active now

10:21 AM

shiho: I can't wait for lunch

ichika: why so?

shiho: we're having a class observation

shiho: one of the teachers are recording the session

mafuyu: your point?

shiho: the point is that the teacher keeps on pointing the camera to my direction

emu: you're allowed to use your phone?

shiho: i need to go to the restroom

ichika: see you later

seen by Hinomori Shiho

emu: how about you hoshino? u can use ur phone?

ichika: i had to sneak it in smh

mizuki: I didn't know you can break the school rules

ichika: hbu? 

mizuki: skipping class :D

ena: zuki wtf

ena: you need to study

mizuki: i prefer to study your art

ena: oh my

mizuki: i could borrow the notes of lil' bro's boyfriend later hehe

akito: i might do the same (i am in the restroom lol)

toya: what if i refuse to lend you two my notes

mizuki: awwww :(

akito: hahaha

akito: i'll ask rui instead

akito: he's friendlier than you 🙄

toya: nvm

ichika: whipped

emu: whipped

akito: i'm about to whip your asses

seen

11:30 AM

saki: YAY ITS LUNCH

saki: ICHI HONA SHIHO

saki: WHERE ARE YA'LL

honami: on our way to the rooftop

airi: don't 

ichika: why?

airi: we're practicing there

ichika: oh

rui: @Shinonome Akito where are you

akito: why

tsukasa: LUNCH

tsukasa: ON THE ROOFTOP

akito: on my way (not /j)

nene: the four of you are eating together??

toya: yes?

toya: and?

kanade: did you know

kanade: you do nothing but play honkai star rail

nene: good rewards + black swan release

toya: what's honkai star rail

nene: Honkai: Star Rail is a role-playing gacha video game developed by miHoYo, published by miHoYo in mainland China and worldwide by Cognosphere, d/b/a HoYoverse. It features the main character, referred to as the "Trailblazer", traveling across worlds resolving disasters caused by the "Stellaron".

toya: uhh...

nene: in short, it's a cool game

nene: better than genshin impact

kanade: wdym

kanade: genshin has better music

nene: i main inbibitor lunae

nene: losers

nene: anyways

nene: i wanna ask something

kanade: what

nene: not you

toya: what

nene: how did the four of you became friends

toya: i already said, i forced akito

an: and how did he agree?

akito: why are all of you curious

akito: don't you have your own girlfriends??

an: wait

an: WAIT

an: THE FOUR OF YOU ARE BOYFRIENDS??

Shiraishi An has unsent a mesage

akito: AN

akito: FUCKING

akito: SHIRAISHI

tsukasa: WHAT WHAT

tsukasa: UNESND THAT

tsukasa: *UNSEDN

tsukasa: *UNSEND

tsukasa: DAMNIT

an: oops

nene: what is that

an: nudes

toya: what

rui: the

nene: fuck

seen

Chapter Text

THE HELLHOLE

• active now

February 08, 2024, 08:41 AM

haruka: guys i may or may not have stolen minori's phone

haruka: guess what's in it

saki: her selfies?

shiho: pictures of you obviously

haruka: YES

haruka: even her gallery doesn't have a single selfie of her

haruka: it's full of my pictures

shiho: she's weird

haruka: you're weirder

saki: both of you are mental

shiho: how dare you

saki: sorry

saki: not sorry

ichika: saki >:(

saki: SORRY

shiho: minori is like a stalker

kohane: how did you get her phone

haruka: she left her phone at our dorm

nene: i remember having a peek at rui's phone as well

rui: wait what

nene: it's full of tsukasa pics

nene: most of them stolen shots

tsukasa: HEY

nene: and akito pics

akito: RUI WHY

nene: wonderstage pics

rui: istg nene, please stop

an: where are the toya pics?

nene: toya pics?

rui: shiraishi no

an: shiraishi YES

rui: ...

haruka: why would there be toya pics?

mizuki: I remember taking a selfie with the kamiyama gang

mizuki: and aoyagi's a bit too private

kohane: true

miku: IS THAT WHY HE ALWAYS DOESN'T SHOW UP IF I TAKE SELFIES OF THE STREET SEKAI

kohane: he's an expert at hiding from cameras

toya: if kamishiro dares to steal pictures of me, i will knock him out

saki: where did that came from??!?!

kohane: prob shinonome's influence

shiho: shinonome who?

mizuki: shinonome ena

ena: I'M BEING QUIET HERE MIZUKI FUCKING AKIYAMA

haruka: why did you even like them in the first place

mizuki: i'm charming duh

ena: whatever

rui: well...

rui: whoever tries to steal a picture of toya will receive 100 yen

mizuki: OOOOH ME

toya: how dare you

rui: to complete them <3

an: you mean

rui: shiraishi :)

an: oh nvm

kohane: what did an do to you

mizuki: RUI WHERE ARE YOU

mizuki: I NEED YOUR PHONE

rui: just don't stalk my messages or something

nene: try logging out

rui: oh okay

seen by Kamishiro Rui and Akiyama Mizuki

shiho: minori's gone too

shiho: where is she

kohane: i think she's chasing haruka around

kohane: someone tipped haruka off for stealing her phone

shiho: oops

saki: hmmm??

saki: ichi where are you?

ichika: studying in my classroom

Saki sent a photo

ichika: HEY

ichika: COME BACK HERE

akito: stealing shots should be illegal

tsukasa: agree

toya: MZIZUSKI STAYFSY THEHDJ FUSJDCK AGWAHS FROEMN MEWEE

an: what

nene: mizuki's taking pictures of toya

nene: rui along with them

toya: I STWWEWAEA TO DHFGL

miku: what's that supposed to mean

toya: AKITO HELP ME

akito: i'm studying :)

toya: LIAR

toya: TSUKASA HELP ME

tsukasa: i'm sleeping

toya: I HATE YOU GUYS

akito: i love you too

seen

my genius 💙

• active now

11:30 AM

BABY

LOVE

SWEETHEART

seen by Aoyagi Toya, 11:30 AM

13:50 PM

toya my beloved

i love you so much

why aren't you noticing me

sweetie

please reply

seen by Aoyagi Toya, 14:05 PM

17:00 PM

TOYAAAAA :(

I'M SORRY

I WILL DELETE THE PICS

you sure?

YES

i'm sorry

sorry

sorry

sorry

sorry

stop

sorry

sorry

sorry

sorry

sorry

sorry

sorry

sorry

I SAID STOP

:(

:(

:(

:(

well fuck it

send me the proof

You sent a photo.

how about the trash bin

You sent a photo.

good

i won't do it again i swear

please

you could've asked me

to send you my photos

oh

i didn't think of that

oh kamishiro

for a genius, you can be stupid sometimes

i'm only stupid for you

ew

anyways

don't do anything like that again okay?

okieeee

seen by Aoyagi Toya and you

THE HELLHOLE

2:00 PM

rui: @Aoyagi Toya

mizuki: AOYAGIIII

mizuki: WE'RE SORRY

mizuki: I'LL STOP ASKING FOR YOUR NOTES

seen

5:09 PM

rui: guys

rin: what

miku: what

saki: what

rui: toya has forgiven me :D

akito: good

emu: YAY

mizuki: he hasn't forgiven me yet :(

ena: it's bcs you're ugly

mizuki: what are you talking about

mizuki: i'm cute

mizuki: right??

mafuyu: no

kanade: no

mizuki: i hate you two so much

Toya has sent a photo

Toya has unsent a message

(Saki replied to a deleted message)

saki: whipped

rui: UNSEND THAT

toya: haha

tsukasa: HOW COME RUI LISTENS TO YOU

nene: so true

nene: I couldn't even make him listen to us

an: because

akito: @MEIKO can you give an ketchup for breakfast

meiko: uh sure...?

an: NO

akito: then shut up :)

kohane: hour 2 of asking what has an done to you

toya: because

nene: what

emu: what

tsukasa: WHAT

toya: i can :)

emu: HEYYYYYYYYY :(

mizuki: how come he's so sassy

ena: thank my brother -n-

akito: HEY

toya: i blackmailed him that if he does shit that pisses me off, i'll tell the principal that he left some of his robots on the empty classroom

mizuki: wow a snitch

mizuki: I can't trust you anymore

rui: i never even told you that

nene: well i did

rui: how dare you

toya: so if rui ever misbehaves, you better tell me and i'll deal with him

tsukasa: OF COURSE :D

rui: TOYA

rui: YOU'RE SO MEAN :(

toya: :)

seen

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THE HELLHOLE

• active now

February 09, 2024, 4:53PM

airi: at last

airi: it's the weekend

kaito: enjoy your weekend everyone!

kaito: make sure to make it relaxing!

akito: stop

kaito: why?

akito: let's end this

kaito: end what?

kaito: wait, am i the only one who is an airhead? [😆 8]

Akiyama Mizuki, Shiraishi An, and 6 others reacted to KAITO's message

akito: lol i'm just kidding

akito: it's just tiring, even on weekends there are plenty of things to do

ena: you want me to give you more tasks??

akito: no

ena: i'm just kidding

mizuki: rare footage of ena joking

ena: shut up

an: i thought you're sad because you're not seeing 'them'

akito: oh my, who

an: pfft...

an: okay let's pretend I don't know so I can have a quiet weekend

mizuki: SPILL THE TEA

akito: duh

akito: they're not even in the classroom

akito: who are you even talking about

an: none?

an: but you're always in your classroom, and two of 'them' are looking at you

toya: shiraishi :)

kohane: hour 3 of asking what an has done to you

akito: huh

akito: they must know a lot

an: it's your fault

an: because if you haven't entered their hearts, they'll not look at you [😆 by Mizuki]

haruka: an wtf

an: you entered their hearts without a reason

an: because of that, their life was messed up [😆 by Mizuki, KAITO, and Kagamine Len]

kaito: i agree

kaito: let them look at you until they have the confidence to admit their feelings for you 

toya: stop it

akito: STOP :(

kaito: it's because you're pretty, ehe

akito: well fuck

airi: who are 'they'?

an: well

toya: shiraishi :)

an: well damn

kohane: hour 4 of asking what an has done to you

airi: well...

airi: i mean, we all know that toya and akito are boyfriends

haruka: don't tell me... 2 other people like akito?

emu: akito harem?!

akito: HEY

honami: ew

akito: THAT'S DISGUSTING

emu: oh

honami: we need to change the subject

honami: it's Akito's secret, and i have a feeling that he's already uncomfortable

mizuki: oh shit sorry

airi: i agree

akito: thank you :)

airi: anyways...

honami: you know what day is it tomorrow?

haruka: saturday

mafuyu: kanade day

honami: yes correct

emu: OH A PARTY

emu: I WANNA COME

mafuyu: who says you're invited

emu: ...

ena: let's go to your house

kaito: you two are living together right?

mafuyu: yep :D

mizuki: YAY

mizuki: NO MORE SHITTY MOM

ena: akito you don't mind having the house to yourself no?

akito: i could invite toya

ena: just don't do the naughty

toya: what makes you think we will do that

ena: gut feelings

kohane: what's the naughty

an: now you're exposing kohane

haruka: they're um... killing each other

akito: somehow that's worse but okay

honami: whoever wants to come to the party can go okie?

ichika: i wanna go

nene: i wanna go and take emu with me

kanade: wow okay

honami: all set then :D

seen

Chapter Text

THE HELLHOLE

• active now

February 14, 2024, 05:38 AM 

honami: HAPPY VALENTINES

tsukasa: HAPPY VALENTINES :D

airi: you two are so early

saki: so are you

saki: i mean, who likes being late

kanade: me

honami: you don't even go to school in the first place

ichika: i'm still showering and my phone is already buzzing with notifications

saki: you use your phone while taking a shower??

ichika: i'm done showering

ichika: duh

nene: good morning everyone

tsukasa: GOOD MORNING NENE :D

nene: too loud

honami: imagine living far from school

honami: that's why waking early is a must

saki: ichi, hona

saki: i booked our tickets to a maze in phoenix wonderland

nene: shiho also right?

saki: obviously??

saki: anyways

saki: dyk that my brother won't stop chatting to himself last night

nene: that's so rui

saki: idk he sounds so excited for something

tsukasa: ofc it's valentines 

tsukasa: excited to treat my boyfriend :D

airi: just done eating

ichika: that's fast

airi: bcs i hate being tardy

airi: unlike a certain someone :)

meiko: you mean minori?

airi: yep

saki: bet you my coin purse

saki: she does nothing but watch ASRUN's old performances last night

airi: exactly

nene: you're all so weird

seen

FASHIONISTA SQUAD

• active now

February 14, 2024, 9:08 AM

tsukasa: BABES

tsukasa: HAPPY CALENTINES :D

tsukasa: VALENTINES* [❤️3]

tsukasa: WHERE ARE YALL

toya: my flowers :(

toya: i forgot where i put them

len: you left it at meiko's cafe

toya: oh shoot

toya: did someone see?

len: only me and meiko huehue

toya: okieee

rui: did you know what i invented for valentines?

akito: huh

rui: look up

akito: RAHAGSHSHSHSHHS

tsukasa: rui sent you too?

kaito: what is that

akito: I AM EATING IN MY CLASSROOM

akito: THERE IS A MFING DRONE

akito: THERE ARE TWO MINI CANNONS ATTACHED TO IT AND IT EXPLODED SOME ROSE PETALS

akito: ALL OVER MY PANCAKES

rui: hehe :3

rui: i hope you like it

akito: bullcrap

akito: luckily there are a few students in my classroom

akito: if akiyama sees it...

akito: anyhow i like it though <3

rui: <3

len: hbu?

len: what plans do you have today?

akito: hmm....

akito: i'll buy some chocolates

len: and what would you do with the chocolates you have bought?

akito: simple

akito: i'll eat them myself

toya: :(

rui: :(

tsukasa: :(

akito: nah jkjk

toya: :)

rui: :)

tsukasa: :)

seen

THE HELLHOLE

• active now

11:30 AM

minori: UWAAAAAA

haruka: ?

shiho: a lot of shit are happening

shiho: ppl keep on entering our classroom with flowers

kohane: AND CHOCOLATES

saki: i wanna die

ichika: please don't 

ichika: i'll pick you up later

seen 11:55 AM

4:37 PM

ichika: why am i on last chat

an: there's some shit program happening earlier

kohane: our prez had a anonymous confession board

an: and?

kohane: I didn't get to write any :,)

honami: why?

kohane: bcs an's not in this school

an: awie <3

kohane: <3

mizuki: okay

mizuki: why th are their flower petals earlier on lil' bro's seat

ena: are there?

mizuki: I WAS CLEANERS FOR WEDNESDAY

mizuki: I HAD A HARD TIME CLEANING IT

toya: i thought of sneaking it in his valentines envelope earlier

mizuki: oh

toya: with rui's help

rui: <3

an: huh

tsukasa: :)

kohane: hour 5 of asking what an has done to you

nene: best date ever <3

ichika: spill the tea

nene: emu treated me on some online cafe

nene: she's so sweet

emu: SEE

emu: IT WAS SO WONDERHOY

ichika: wonderwhat?

emu: WONDERHOY

ichika: whatever

airi: GUYS >:(

ena: why

ena: what's up

rin: pop

airi: SHIZUKU HAS A LOT OF CHOCOLATES AND FLOWERS FROM THE BOYS

airi: HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL THAT SHE'S MINE

mizuki: woa girl chill

shizuku: i'm still yours :(

rin: HAPPY VALENTINES :D

seen

Chapter Text

THE HELLHOLE

March 4, 2024, 12:40PM

emu: DEAD GC ALERT DEAD GC ALERT 🚨

ichika: they're probably just busy with their studies

tsukasa: or sleeping :D

rui: tsukasa-kun~

rui: you're supposed to be studying~

seen by Tenma Tsukasa

saki: BROTHER ALSO SLACKS??

shiho: wdym by 'also'

saki: aha

shiho: ...

akito: @Aoyagi Toya WHERE TF ARE YOU

emu: huh

an: WE HAVE PRACTICE

an: RAHHHHH

toya: i tripped down the stairs

akito: ...

an: ...

kohane: ...

toya: and i am ill

akito: fuck you

toya: is that an insult or in your to do list??

akito: what

toya: what

akito: ffs toya

akito: you better practice or i'll make you more more jump off a roof :)

toya: :(

saki: more more jump mention !!

toya: i hate practice

akito: well i hate you too

rui: well

rui: since you hate him

rui: what if i take him away from you

an: but

an: shit

rui: :)

kohane: part unknown of asking what an has done to you

kohane: +lost count :D

akito: well

akito: yes

rui: go ahead

rui: curse me with that pretty mouth of yours~

akito: ...

emu: my gaydar is sensing something

saki: YES

saki: THE GAYDAR NEVER LIES

emu: lets collab

saki: EYYYYYY :D

ichika: what are they talking about??

shiho: idek

akito: toya i'm serious

akito: we're going to attend a live house tomorrow

toya: say please

akito: pleaseeeee

ena: desperate mf

akito: shut up

toya: okie

seen by Aoyagi Toya

meiko: sometimes you two don't act like siblings

ena: huehue

seen

9:13 PM

ena: why am i on last chat

mafuyu: everyone is prob busy

mizuki: aren't you supposed to be on class?

ena: i just finished my tasks though

ena: unlike you

mizuki: geez

toya: please do your homework

toya: the teacher is going to sue me

mizuki: no

akito: how does it feel

akito: if someone doesn't like participating

toya: it feels nice

mizuki: muehehwheheje

mizuki: i will not pass my homework

toya: no ena for one year

ena: yay

mizuki: WHAT

toya: @Shiraishi An @Megurine Luka kindly kidnap ena

luka: omw

nene: i think an is sleeping

rui: you're still playing video games

nene: i just got hanabi

kanade: go to sleep

nene: how about you

kanade: I don't sleep

mafuyu: yes you do

seen by Yoisaki Kanade

rui: i sometimes forget that those two pive together

ena: same

mizuki: LUKAAA DON'T KIDNAP ENA

toya: then do your homework :)

ena: luka please kidnap me

mizuki: please no

ena: please go

mafuyu: please sleep mizuki

seen

Chapter Text

THE HELLHOLE

March 5, 2024, 10:14 AM

saki: what a pity

saki: we have a test in math

saki: and i was absent on monday

saki: and i have no idea what they're dealing with

ichika: you could've asked me

saki: but you're always busy

ichika: i'm literally waiting for you rn

mizuki: what is the test about though-?

shiho: triangles

haruka: triangles

mizuki: well

mizuki: a triangle is a triangle because it has three angles

ichika: how is that supposed to help

saki: it's true though

ichika: geez

mizuki: how many angles are in a triangle?

ichika: three

mizuki: what's another name for three

ichika: tri

mizuki: you see what i am talking about? :)

ichika: the information is still useless

mafuyu: like me

kanade: shut up, that's my gf we're talking about

saki: that's sweet~

saki: if only shiho can be that sweet...

shiho: now why did my name get dragged in the row

saki: huehue :)

seen

March 13, 2024, 04:44 AM

miku: MORNING EVERYONE

kaito: you are too early

kaito: are you looking forward to see someone?

miku: well

kanade: did you know

kanade: i secretly wanted to kms

mafuyu: sure

mafuyu: lets do it together

rin: awww 🥺

miku: did you know

miku: i can break the fourth wall

meiko: what is that supposed to mean

miku: well

miku: 📍(Pinned) the days where the group chat is inactive because the author is lazy to update the book

rin: wait

rin: we're just in a book-?

miku: yes

kanade: oh

miku: and i am proud to say that this book has 1.8k reads

miku: and i think it means a lot to author

mafuyu: nice

meiko: so the author just makes us say excuses whenever they haven't updated in a while?

miku: yes

kaito: shall i pin this

kaito: so all of us are aware

miku: sure

(KAITO has pinned a message)

miku: anyhow, don't try stressing yourselves over the thought okie?

kanade: okay mother

rin: meiko is the best mother btw

kaito: duh

meiko: ...

miku: i am planning

miku: that if this book reaches 2k reads, i'll try to force the author to do something special with me

mafuyu: good luck with that

seen

Chapter Text

THE HELLHOLE

• active now

April 02, 2024, 3:10 PM

miku: WAKE UP EVERYONE

rin: I AM AWAKE I AM AWAKE

akito: did you know

akito: i am dating three people

an: i know

ena: WHAT

saki: HEY :D

akito: april fools 

an: damn it

rui: huehue

rui: you thought

kohane: part rifbbdksojwsi of asking what an has done to you

an: i'm all right:D

kohane: but i am your gf

kohane: i deserve to know

an: well...

minori: HAHAKSIDODNEIDHDJSISJSJ

shiho: ??

minori: JSHEOEHDISJEJDXOSO

airi: she just saw haruka's cover with ena's brother, kamishiro, and kaito

airi: she's giving me an earrape

haruka: i can be ur angle

haruka: o r  y o u r  d e v i l >:)

seen by Hanasato Minori

nene: now what the heck is that

miku: EVERYONE

miku: WE HAVE REACHED 2k READS :D

emu: OMG

emu: THAT IS SO WONDERHOY

saki: YAYAYAYAY

mafuyu: bet they had fun thirdwheeling

miku: so as promised

miku: i will force the author to be active and help me on our first q&a!

saki: YAY QUESTIONS

miku: so readers, feel free to ask or dare us anything in the comments

miku: and we will try our best to do them all

emu: LETS GOOOO

seen

Chapter Text

i leo/need u

• active now

June 9, 2024, 4:04 PM

ichika: long time, no see

rin: i bet my organs that the author is lazy again

miku: yes

honami: i'm on a roadtrip with my fam 😘

saki: YOU COULD'VE TOOK ME WITH YOU :(

honami: next time saki :)

Tenma Saki has sent a sticker: <bald-avatar.png>

honami: uh guys...?

honami: i think i'm going to puke

shiho: that's what you get from using the phone in the car

seen by everyone

Chapter Text

THE HELLHOLE

•active now

June 13, 3:43 PM

mikudayo: I just realized

mikudayo: that we can change our nicknames

negitoroshallsail: you're miku right?

mikudayo: yeah

mikudayo: who are you?

negitoroshallsail: the one and only

negitoroshallsail: luka megurine

ren: the two of you are so cute together :<

NO 1 HARUKA STAN: rip you

NO 1 HARUKA STAN: whoever you are

ren: i'm rin

ren: and i'm guessing you're minori?

NO 1 HARUKA STAN: YES

NO 1 HARUKA STAN: MY NICKNAME SAYS IT ALL

wine mom: who tinkered our nicknames???

mikudayo: me

mikudayo: with an's help

mikudayo: and rin's help

mizook: don't forget me!

mikudayo: and mizuki's help

ihatechemistry: i hope you like the nicknames!

shinonomedavinci: who tf changed my nickname

mizook: you don't like it? :(

shinonomedavinci: no

mizook: aww :(

ihatechemistry: who are you then?

shinonomedavinci: i'm akito

mrloverboy: shut the fuck up

mrloverboy: do I look like I commit art

shinonomedavinci: i though i impersonated my brother well

WONDERHOY IS THE BEST MEDICINE: you had me fooled!

gamergirl: why are your nicknames so long

ren: they suggested those nicknames while we're changing it :3

ichika | stream rabbit hole by hatsune miku!: i got the longest nickname

ichika | stream rabbit hole by hatsune miku!: beat that

barbie: at least we know who ichi is ! ! !

k: i got the shortest nickname

Yuki: i decided to keep my nightcord nickname

shinonomedavinci: i wanna change my nickname

mizook: but your nickname is cute :(

shinonomedavinci: can someone tell mizuki to stop messing with me for one day at least?

Yuki: no

k: no

ihatechemistry: no

shinonomedavinci: fuck you all

Shinonome Ena changed her nickname to Enanan~

mrloverboy: suddenly i wanna change mine too

ihatechemistry: no you don't

mrloverboy: can't stop me

Shinonome Akito changed his nickname to pancakelvr

Enanan~: copycat

mizook: since when does lil' bro use aesthetic nicknaming?

pancakelvr: since last year

mikudayo: i'm patiently waiting for everyone to chat

ren: true

ren: i want to cackle at their nicknames

aoaoaoaoaoaoaoao: now who made my nickname like this

mizook: LMFAOOOO

WONDERHOY IS THE BEST MEDICINE: WHO'S THAT

aoaoaoaoaoaoaoao: secret

Tenma Saki has sent a sticker: <bald-avatar-laughing.png>

Otori Emu, Akiyama Mizuki, Kagamine Rin, and 5 others have reacted 😂 to Tenma Saki's sticker

apple pie enthusiast: why

apple pie enthusiast: has your sticker have to be bald

barbie: it's cool

barbie: right?? :D

WONDERHOY IS THE BEST MEDICINE: TRUEEEEE

gamergirl: i suddenly have flashbacks in my discord days

Aoyagi Toya has changed his nickname to .

.: now that's better

lin: NOW WHAT KIND OF NICKNAME IS THAT

negitoroshallsail: aoyagi toya being funny part 1

WORLD FUTURE STAR: at least have a proper nickname

.: no

.: i mean okay

ihatechemistry: whipped

Tenma Tsukasa has changed Aoyagi Toya's nickname to toyer

ihatechemistry: for once, no one stopped me

#1 vegetable anti: so

ihatechemistry: so it means i can expose ya now?

#1 vegetable anti: if you want tomatoes in your salad

kohamster: hashtag stop an abuse

hearts4momoi: some of your nicknames are sane

downbadforpenguins: yes

hearts4momoi: i didn't say you

NO 1 HARUKA STAN: HEY >:(

shizuku: yes

hearts4momoi: oh shizuku

wine mom: you didn't change your nickname?

shizuku: how though

dni if you are my sister: typical of you

Momoi Airi changed Hinomori Shizuku's nickname to technical failure

downbadforpenguins: that's a bit rude

hearts4momoi: at least it speaks facts

technical failure: i swear if i know how to use messenger

gamergirl: what will you do

gamergirl: send us an army of emojis

hearts4momoi: shut up

hearts4momoi: i'm the only one who can talk to her like that

(mizook replied to gamergirl: send us an army of emojis)

mizook: HELP LMAO

k: where's kaito

negitoroshallsail: idk

papa kaito: now who changed my nickname to this

mikudayo: ehe

ren: it suit's you btw

seen by everyone

Chapter Text

wonderlands showtime

• active now

July 16, 2024, 1:10PM

annoying midget: THE GROUP CHAT NAME

annoying midget: WHAT HAPPENED TO THE 'X'?

sleeping beauty: leave it be....

tired father: who are you

tired father: i mean i know who luka is ofc

Megurine Luka is typing...

weightlifter: she's sleeping in my lap again

HAPPY SMILE: typical luka

lenlenlenlenlen: i have a feeling luka made this group chat

annoying midget: THE ONE AND ONLY

annoying midget: HATSUNE MIKUUUUUUU

nener: GUYS

nener: GUYS

nener: GUYS

nener: GUYS

nener: GUYS

nener: GUYS

nener: GUYS

sleeping beauty: what

nener: I TOLD EMU TO MAKE ME LUNCH

nener: I MEAN

nener: SHE MADE ME LUNCH

dangerous director: and then?

nener: ITS

annoying midget: good?

nener: BURNT

annoying midget: naurrr :(

EMU IS MEANING SMILE: well...

EMU IS MEANING SMILE: i may have been preparing for school and i left the food

WORLD FUTURE STAR: you're worse than toya

dangerous director: (instant cupcake flashbacks)

nener: that's so stupid emu

Kusanagi Nene has sent a sticker: <facepalm.png>

EMU IS MEANING SMILE: I'M SORRY NENE-CHANNNNNNNNNN

nener: lesson learned

nener: never make your girlfriend cook your lunch

seen by everyone

Chapter Text

THE HELLHOLE

• active now

gamergirl: it's been a long time

WONDERHOY IS THE BEST MEDICINE: dead gc alert ‼️ ‼️ 

mikudayo: the author is too lazy to update

apple pie enthusiast: i forgotten what our last convo is abt

barbie: i miss yall :(

pancakelvr: i don't. 

WORLD FUTURE STAR: you always have to be like this ughhh :((

Enanan~: real

Enanan~: that's why dad hates you

pancakelvr: as though he doesn't hate you asw

mizook: ooh burn~

Enanan~: >:(

pancakelvr: >:(

negitoroshallsail: guys

negitoroshallsail: we have good news and bad news

mikudayo: which one do you want to hear first

ihatechemistry: BAD NEWS :(

hearts4momoi: BAD NEWS

downbadforpenguins: bad news

ren: THE BAD NEWS AAAAAAAA

ichika | stream monitoring by hatsune miku!: bad news

dni if you are my sister: bad news. 

pancakelvr: bad news

mikudayo: okay

mikudayo: lets start with the good news

pancakelvr: well fuck

Yuki: why did you ask...

mikudayo: so all of us know this chatroom is just a work of a fiction right?

wine mom: like all of us

mizook: damn it

NO 1 HARUKA STAN: you do not have to say it like that 😭😭😭

#1 vegetable anti: i know lol

papa kaito: at least someone agrees

toyer: me too!

#1 vegetable anti: <3

toyer: <3

kohamster: wait

kohamster: are you two a thing as well-?

pancakelvr: are you that slow

Shinonome Akito unsent a message

ihatechemistry: um

toyer: yes

toyer: just friends <3

toyer: i send hearts to everyone

gamergirl: bro got friendzoned

#1 vegetable anti: :')

mizook: rui's secret takes longer to reveal than my secret ughhhh

mikudayo: ANYWAY

mikudayo: we've nearly reached 5k reads

technical failure: 👍

hearts4momoi: rude

lin: THANK YOU ALL READERS 🔥🔥🔥

dni if you are my sister: how odd

dni if you are my sister: how tf can you scroll and witness the bullshit happening here

ichika | stream monitoring by hatsune miku!: maybe they're used to it

k: thank you readers...

Yuki: ...for being part of the chaos

ihatechemistry: at least none of you died bcs of high blood pressure lmaoooo

mikudayo: thing is, we still have two unanswered questions

mikudayo: the 2k special that is supposed to happen months ago

apple pie enthusiast: oh

mikudayo: and because its a 2k special, we only got 2 questions so far

gamergirl: 💀💀

WONDERHOY IS THE BEST MEDICINE: 💀 💀 

mikudayo: first question is: vocaloids or teto

wine mom: shame

wine mom: there are no utaus here

barbie: TETO

ichika | stream monitoring by hatsune miku!: obviously the vocaloids

mizook: THE VOCALOIDS 🔥🔥

k: same

k: teto is actually peak as well

mikudayo: and a dare to love ourselves

Yuki: how

mizook: ??

Enanan~: when you eat, sleep, and drink water

#1 vegetable anti: you love yourself so much that you do those to keep on going

Yuki: oh

Enanan~: besides, aren't you a thing with kanade?

Yuki: what about it

technical failure: she means if you learn how to love yourself, you can love others

hearts4momoi: real!

Yuki: ah okay

mikudayo: and the bad news is

toyer: what

apple pie enthusiast: what

downbadforpenguins: what

WORLD FUTUE STAR: WHAT

ren: what????

Yuki: is what?

mikudayo: ...this book is getting discontinued

Chapter Text

THE HELLHOLE

• active now

akito: no shit?

tsukasa: this book is getting discontinued??

tsukasa: wait we just blinked and our usernames are suddenly gone

honami: now that you say it, something is indeed wrong with our usernames...

ichika: i miss my user :(

nene: boo hoo sucks to be you 

(😂10)

Kamishiro Rui and 9 others reacted to Kusanagi Nene's message

an: LMAO BYEEEE

emu: nene chan :(( bullying people is bad

nene: in group chats, bullying people is normal

rui: yes correct

meiko: what happened to our usernames though..

miku: i have a feeling the author has something to do with this

shiho: the author's laziness is in a new whole level tf

miku: i had to spy on her somehow

miku: she's writing this at 1 in the morning

mizuki: AT 25:00 LETS GOA

miku: rumours tell me she has been switching fandoms

kohane: awww :(

miku: anyways, have you have any farewell messages?

mafuyu: why

miku: it's necessary lol

rin: but only this book is discontinuing, not the game

airi: the amount of fourth wall breaks attempted is enough to destroy one's phone

miku: it's necessary tho

an: I WON'T SAY ANY FAREWELL UNTIL AKITO ADMITS IT

akito: admit what

an: iykyk

akito: hell no

an: hell yes

akito: hell yesn't

ena: what the fuck

miku: I'll start

miku: readers, thank you for reading this through and through~ may your pulls be blessed!

shizuku: and the screen turns yellow or blue

miku: shut you are ruining the mood

miku: also it's called manifestation

rin: I WILL BE MISSING YALL :((

len: goodbye ig??

len: it was nice meeting you all lmao

luka: ily all readers <333 may you full combo all the songs, grind all the crystals, and get the characters you want

nene: luka it's up to the players if they want to grind

toya: real 

toya: luck doesn't decide if they get a ginormous amount of crystals or an ass amount.

toya: it's called motivation and effort.

miku: so motivated that they only log in for the crystals or they just sit back and relax until a login campaign is hosted 😔😔

meiko: all right my turn

meiko: remember to stay hydrated kids!

kaito: likewise ^^^

ichika: please stream all the latest miku songs rn asap 🙏🙏🙏🙏

saki: always stay safe and healthy readers! I love you all!!

honami: I am so going to miss the chaos happening here <\3

shiho: well I don't 

saki: aw :(

emu: awwwwww :((((

shiho: anyways readers i hope your braincells are still intact after reading this through

minori: STREAM ANTI YOU GUYS... ITS SO PEAK

meiko: the beginning sounds like beyond the way that I actually danced that

luka: lmfao 😭😭

haruka: even if this is only like, a few chapters or smth, I wanna thank u all for ur patience whenever the stupid author has delays in updating

airi: AND MAKE SURE TO WATCH THE PJSK MOVIE :D

ena: *pirate

mizuki: LMAO BYE

akito: wtf

mafuyu: ena is not being ena today...

shizuku: goodbye everyone :) it's nice meeting you all

shiho: you do realise that we can all literally see each other irl 🙄🙄

airi: yes correct

kohane: uhmmm what do i say

akito: anything

kohane: oh okay

kohane: anything

Shinonome Akito is typing…

an: he’s at a lost for words XD

kohane: but seriously,,, i am going to miss this fic smmm,,, even if i don’t get to chat a lot well :33

an: I WILL NOT BADE MY FAREWELL UNTIL AKITO EXPOSES HIMSELF

an: OR THE BOYS

tsukasa: what did we do??

mizuki: heheh what happened?

mafuyu: ^ likewise

akito: well, how about i will NOT BADE MY FAREWELL IF AN STILL WISHES TO EXPOSE US ME (edited)

an: BRO THIS FIC IS ENDING AND YOU ARE STILL BEING MORE SECRETIVE THAN MIZUKI

ena: at least mizuki opened up ! !

mizuki: yeah , ,

akito: BRO SHUT

toya: sighing rn

toya: anyways i am so going to see you soon readers!

toya: and NO procrastinating on your studies or i’m in your walls <3

rui: fufu how threatening

rui: makes me wanna procrastinate 

saki: bro WHAT

ichika: hUH

nene: cheater :/

toya: i will touch you.

Aoyagi Toya has unsent a message

len: wait tHE HELL IS THAT?!?!?!?!

mizuki: i just blinked for a moment and the message was suddenly gone

ena: can yall stop making references no one even cares abt…

mizuki: i’m not making references?

an: WHAT IS THAT TOYA

toya: :)

kanade: my chronically online behavior saw that

saki: SPILL

kanade: and i would like to say that it’s normal for any highschool students to make jokes like that

an: but I didn’t see what he has sent

toya: :)

nene: the real question is, how could rui be on his knees when toya suddenly types like that??

emu: you DONT HAVE TO phrase it like that nene chan :((

toya: :)

honami: now seriously the smiles are sending me

shiho: lemme join u

mafuyu: aren’t we supposed to be bidding our farewells??

an: up

akito: UP

mafuyu: oh

tsukasa: GOODBYE EVERYONE I WILL BE MISSING EVERY FUNNY INTERACTIONS WE HAD HERE :D

emu: this is so wonderno :((

emu: thank you for your… SUPER WONDERPATIENCE and WONDERTOLERANCE when you completed this!!

akito: where did those words came from

emu: from my DICTIONARY :D

nene: okay uh goodbye ig?

rui: hehe i will miss you all!

kaito: legend says that the readers can see the unsent messages

rui: oops

akito: oh shit

kaito: ??

an: heh

an: losers

toya: let them :)

shiho: ugh stop smiling

kanade: goodbye everyone

kanade: also i love cup noodles

mafuyu: bye

mafuyu: and you can’t live on instant noodles

ena: who are you talking to

mafuyu: it depends on how you perceive it as

ena: geez whatever

ena: anyways AI ART is really trash and uhhhhh… thank you for reading this through??

mizuki: i really hope you got the laughs and… yeah :33

mizuki: because we are a circus

emu: CORRECT

saki: real

airi: sigh… real

miku: so is that it?

an: AKITO

akito: AN

an: YOU SPEAK UP OR I SPEAK UP

kohane: ermm an

kohane: we can figure it out ourselves

an: damn i am NOT losing to this ginger

akito: hehe good luck figuring it out

an: grrr

kohane: it’s okie ^v^!!

haruka: thank you all once again!!

miku: bye-o!

minori: wAAAAH I CA

The group chat is deleted