Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Katski bakugo is approximately 5 years old when his life is thrown off course. He, deku and all the other extras were on adventure thought the forest. It was mid summer when the air feels vaguely thick and buzzes with a sweltering sense of life. The critters screaming bird chattering and boys laughing.

Katski's quirk has been acting up recently. It's his first summer with a sweat induced quirk so it's definitely not been easy. Deku's only gotten diagnosed as quirkless a month ago but the sting of betrayal Bakugo felt was still fresh. They were supposed to be top heros together. He was supposed to be strong like Katski but now his best friend is weak and he doesn't know how to deal with it.

He's never felt the worlds injustice so strongly before, so he does the most logical thing an blames Deku. It doesn't make sense to not have a quirk so obviously it must be Izuku's fault somehow. He made a promise and now it was broken. Katski was still wondering how long he should hold a grudge.

To be a Bakugo is to be strong. Izu is weak now. Every time he's seen a quirkless person on TV they're always useless. They have to get saved or they're a complete drain on their family. That or they're old. In school they said that years and years ago all the world were quirkless and underdeveloped but now they've evolved. Katski isn't sure if that makes Izuku devolved or old or something like that but he's pretty certain he's useless.

He doesn't think he hates him. If he was Izuku he doesn't know how he would cope. . Definitely not like Deku was now. He was all smiles, bouncing around the place and would not stop taking. I mean that was the way he liked the nerd but he now he needed to know his new place in the world. Below Katski instead of with him.

He was the leader wading through what felt like a jungle. They left the trail way back to try and find a proper secret hide out for their hero base. They were lost but he didn't want to admit it. He was the leader and he was going to make this super cool base if it killed him. Fingers was whining like a little bitch and bat wings was dragging his extra appendages across the ground. So far Deku was the only one holding his weight. Bouncing around like a little idiot with that stupid grin across is face. Babbling like always. They were arguing on who was second best hero from the TV show All might friends and fight a new dawn of power.

"But cyborg cider man number two is so strong Kacchan! His carbonated punch would nock anyone else on their but"

"Just say ass Deku. Plus that's so stupid just because -"

"Just 'cause aunty swears doesn't mean you can." He wines, failing to glare sternly.

"Don't interrupt me nerd. Cyborg cider ma- STOP! " katski puffed out his chest Self-Importantly. Completely distracted from his previous conversation he looked out at the the coursing river blocking their path. Stretched out directly Infront of him lay a bridge.

He surveyed the surrounding areas and looked across. Bridge was a generous word for it because it more closely resembled a wedged log of half rotted wood. It definitely looked unstable and the fall downwards was quite far especially for a five year old. They could just follow the lake back towards the edge of the wood towards home but they still hadn't found their base yet. As the leader of this expedition he made his decision.

"I've got the best quirk. I'm the mostest heroic one here so I should cross first". Izuku gave a dramatic gasp but the other two just nodded approvingly.

"No, Katcchan it's wet and you don't know if it could snap. What if you fell into the water. It's really shallow, you could get hurt !" The nerd was attempting to look stern again but was off set by his teary-eyes. He could be soscared sometimes for no reason.

The others just huffed out laughs behind him. They knew Katski was strong. Izu could be so dumb sometimes. It did feel more dramatic though.

"I'm going to cross this gigantic river all by myself just watch me," Deku made a high anxious noise at the back of his throat but Bakugo went ahead without looking back. He put his arms out like those tight rope people. Step by step he made his way across the bridge untill he was mid way. He felt like he was flying. Slowly he turned his head to give a satisfied smirk to deku. He glanced down and then immediately regretted it.

It felt like everything became hyper focused. He could hear the buzzing of bugs and the leaves shuddering in the breese. 'The breeze' he thought, he could feel that too. And very quickly it felt more like a huge gust wind. He swayed slightly. He over corrected, leaning towards the other direction wobbling and before he could blink his footing was gone.

He doesn't remember the falling or the yelps of shock. He doesn't remember his knee jerk explosion he lets out that only has him slamming into the ground ten times harder.

What he does remember, however is the sudden sharp pain in his skull and the burst of images and memories. It's like a tsunami of snapshots. Fashes of scenes playing out before him. How long he was stuck flicking though this collage of memory he doesn't know. It feels like hours, days or more likely years all pressed into a moment. He sees an older version of him self taunting an older version of Izuku. He feels a thick vicious slime choking his air ways. He see U.A. , villains, lazy Sundays, dorm nights, hero work all untill a singular point in the future.

An adult version of himself in the dark, slumped slightly, huffing out laboured breaths.

"Deku did you get out" no answer. Shit. "do you hear me?" Still no answer. The room he's in is small and cramped. There's a faint rumbling sound in the distance and the foundations of the building shake.

"Shitty Deku, fuck come on someone." his ear piece just fuzzes faintly in the background. The other line is dead. It doesn't necessarily mean anything. "Fuck, fuckity, shit, balls." He's panting now shifting in the dark to feel out were the wall is. He's feels a drop of sweat run down his forehead but he only feels him self getting colder. Slowly he slides down to the floor his side bursting out in pain.

"Fuuuucckk" he's definitely losing a lot of blood. It was a deep cut but he didn't have enough light to check it right now. Deku was in the building with him when I collapsed but it doesn't mean anything the nerd will be fine.

Another rumble and he feels what's left of the floor above him begin to shift. He tries to give out small crackles to illuminate the space. It's faint but still omits small flashes op light like a crackling fire. The space is smaller then a storage cupboard. He can only, just stretch his legs out. Another grumble and he can feel the whole building above him shift irrevocably. Oh God this could not be how this ends. Fuck. He can feel it now. His life in a stand still. A moment. He feels it flash in an instant and then all the layers of rubble crashing down onto him.

Darkness.

complete darkness.

He doesn't say anything when his eyes open again and he can see Deku standing over him. He doesn't say anything when all the boys are bombarding him with questions. "Are you ok-" "why aren't you speaking, please say-" " Katchan can you hear me" it all blurs into one blob of nothing. How can he be sure that this isn't a memory. Nothing feels real.

He doesn't remember walking out of he forest or the ambulance to the hospital. They put him in a brain scan thing and then he's driving home. He's in the back seat looking out the window it's dark now. All those things he saw it felt so real. Like a never ending real images float infront of him too unreal to properly grasp.

Slowly he zones back into reality. The car is deadly silent. He can see his mums white knuckled grip on the steering wheel and the tense line of her shoulders.

"I'm sorry," Katski almost whispers. Is throat hurts and feels a heat filling up behind his eyes. He will not cry. He's already been weak enough as it is he can't cry.

"Katski Bakugo," Mitsuki says and oh shit he'd never felt so scared. "Do have any fucking idea how stupid that was." she hadn't raised her voice and he couldn't help bowing his head and hunching his shoulders. She was pissed. "You could've died. What would me and your father done eh?" No response and more silence. The burning at the back of his throat was getting stronger.

He shifts in his seat the non reality of it all still clinging to him. "What the fuck was going through your head. You wanted to impress you friends. Well congratulations they're mighty impressed now" she was breathing heavily. "Shattering you skull for entertainment. Probably the best use for it since can't fucking use your brain. And my God brat!" She was shouting now. "I thought you were damaged. I thought something was wrong with your head. Not responding to anyone. But nooo you were fine. More dramatics was it. Jesus Christ Katski I thought... I thought..." she gave a shuddering breath and deep silence fell through the car again. Katski looked out the window he couldn't help it now he was silently crying. The words 'something wrong with your head' and 'damaged' looping indefinitely.

They were pulling into the house now. She parked and didn't say anything more. They walked up the path together Katski slightly lagging behind his mum. She wrenched the door open. His dad was sitting waiting on the sofa. Mitsuki slammed the door shut and went to hang up her keys and coat forcefully stumping up the stairs to her room. Katski just stood there in the middle of the living room, head bowed, slightly shaking and still crying .

He flinched when Masaru put a hand on his shoulder. They don't do touching in this house. Awkwardly Masaru puts him in a stiff hug and as quickly as it came it's gone before Katski can even reciprocate. Stiltedly Masaru brushes his hands against his sides and it painfully obvious how hard he's attempting to search for words to say.

"Your Mum she... Well she was worried." He looks at Katski as if he should respond to this statement. Obviously he doesn't, just stays still. "This is just how she shows she cares" he continues and Katski thinks dejectedly that if this is how she shows she cares about people he doesn't want it.

If it was auntie inko she'd be crying and hugging him like no tomorrow. If she was here, she'd be makeing his favourite food and watching shows with him and Stroking his hair in that way that always makes him feel sleepy. He wishes his mum was auntie. Deku doesn't even know how lucky he's got it.

His dad's still staring at him so he just nods and turns towards the stairs.

Slow he makes his own way to his room and slams the door violently behind him.

"Keep it down brat"

"Shut up hag"

He guesses it's just business as usual then. He was a big boy now. He was five years old and needed to learn to take care of things himself. He strong so doesn't need someone holding his hand through this. He thinks about all those memories again and gives a big shudder. He dives under his covers and scrunchies his eyes tight to stop from crying. He stayed like that zoned out controling his breathing for ages. By the time he's stopped he's really tired. He wishes he could sleep in his parents bed tonight. As much as he hates to admit it he scared. Really scared and doesn't know if he can get to sleep.

Chapter Text

The next few weeks were hard for Bakugo. His parents were out on work trip again for 10 days to Paris or some shit. They dumped him at Inko's as usual not that he minded very much.

His five year old brain was opting to try its hardest to suppress the sheer amount of emotions trying to attack him from all angles. Everything was too much for Katski. It felt like all the things working around in his head were going to explode. Like a constant static buzzing pressing against his skull. It was unbearable. So it followed that he would much rather be at Deku's then home alone.

Inko worked from home so was always around. Since his quirk came around his parents had stopped hiring babysitters so he was often left to his own devices untill they came back from work. He had never really realised how lonely he felt after school waiting untill he went to the Midoriya's. He never had to wait for auntie. Sometimes he wished that he could just stay with her but a wave of angry guilt at himself always sleeps in. It was just that this house felt so worm and inviting. It was messy and had toys and nicknacks spread everywhere and pictures lining the hallway. Izu and auntie together but mainly it was Izuku's baby pictures when he looked like a smooshed strawberry. secretly Katski still liked it way better then his house. All the pictures there were magazine covers and photo shoot pictures from editorials. And the occasional picture of his dad, inko and his mum in college. No pictures of him.

Although he was immeasurably happy to be here, Inko had kept a closer eye on Katski then normal because of how mean he been to Deku over the past month. It hurt a bit, like she was slightly on edge around him. He kinda understood, he was really mean to him but he never wanted auntie to look at him like that. Throughout the week he played normally with Izuku. It was fun actually and he'd forgotten how much he missed his best friend. His mind forcefuly goes back to his visions of an older him hurting Deku. Like intermittent flashes of how sad Izuku looked. Of him hurting him over and over. How could be so cruel to someone as nice and nerd like. He had been treating him badly though ever since he got diagnosed as quirkless. He could become that person so he had to work hard

It was the holidays so they had all the free time in the world. He wasn't allowed to rough play though because he still had a big bruise on his head so they mainly stayed inside. Firmly he thinks, that he's never going make fun of Deku again. He would forgive Izuku for being quirkless if ment they got play and talk all the time.

They were playing on the floor with a toy car, an all might and an Endeavour. They didn't have any villain toys so they used an Endeavour one instead. Endeavour is trying take down Allmight and become the number one hero instead. Izukus rambling in his villain speech about the ranking system and how he plans to buy of the hero comission and stage an all out war in hero society. Katski is frankly not listening and smashes the Elsa toy violently against Endeavour. Izuku the starts to ramble about the parameters on Elsas quirk. Katski just looks at Izuku silently, watching him excitedly ramble and invent more of this story. He really missed this nerd. Eventually Izuku looks up.

"What's wrong Kacchan?" Izuku said with a concerned tilt to his head. Katski just leaps forwards and hugs Izuku as tightly as possible. Izuku makes a sound like all the air in his lungs just has been forcibly removed out of his lungs but still hugs back.

At first it's just silent.

Katski just opens and closes his mouth struggling to find something to say.

"I'm sorry" it's barely a whisper. Izuku still hears it because he squeezed him.

They finally pull apart and of course Izuku's crying. "Dumb nerd" Katski says smiling and slightly pushing his shoulder.

"We're best friends again?" Izuku gives a little sniff ginning widely. Katski only nods. At this Izuku actually squeals and jumping around on the sofa shouting, "KATCHAN'S MY BEST FRIEND!"

Katski quickly tackles him untill their both writhing around on the floor together. Katski's makeing faint growing sounds whilst Izuku's just giggling.

Inko walks in to tell them dinner is ready when she happens apon this ball of child. She stares fondly at them rolling around. They must of properly made up.

She had been looking for changes after Izuku got his diagnosis as quirkless. Katski very pointedly did not want to play at 'Deku's house' and she could tell this could be one of those changes. It took a toll on her little Izu. Mitsuki had just said he would grow out of it and Inko doubted it but she guesses she was wrong.

The way he has said Deku had definitely changed the last time she'd seen him. It use to be taunting and mean spirited but now it had an air of fondness to it. Whilst this was definitely an improvement she didn't want Izuku getting a complex about being useless, especially from his friends. She'd talk to him after dinner. She also definitely needed to talk to Mitsuki about if anything had happened to Katski recently. She knows he'd hurt his head but when you're young you get bumps and scratches without even trying. No it was definitely something else. He's always been a energetic boy and usually had a big mischievous grin or an angry scowl perpetually stretched across his face. These past few days he's seemed almost sad.

At this point the tumbling has progressed into full on wrestling. It's then when she remembers why exactly bakugo shouldn't be fighting. "Boys." They both immediately stop and turn to look at her. "Remember Katski still has a bump on the back of his head. I did say no rough play this week." looking appropriately chastised they begin to orient them selves and brush eachother off. "Now, time for dinner!" They simultaneously lightened up together and bounded past into the kitchen chittering about wether Elsa or Endeavour would loose in a fight.

They were at the dinner table eating spicy ramen. Katski's favourite. Izuku was talking his ear off and auntie was nodding and humming along. That small indulgent smile she had only for Izuku.

Katski ached. He didn't want to go home tomorrow. Immediately he felt guilty and tried to think about something else.

Again his mind flashed to all those things he'd seen. He couldn't let it happen. Some of it was fucking cool. Like him being a hero and stuff but all that other shit. He was so mean to Deku and beat him up and stuff.

Like a villain.

His mothers words when they were driving home echoed around his head. 'Damaged'. Normal people didn't see this stuff. He was damaged.

"-so yeah. Katchan what do you think?" Izuku paused looking at Katski expectedly.

" I ,I umm" Katski stuttered.

"Katski are you ok darling?" Inko was looking at him with her brow furrowed. Katski guessed that he looked pretty pathetic. He hadn't touched his food and he was still floundering with what exactly to say.

Slowly she made her way to him across the table and crouched down so that she was eye level with him as she spoke. "You've been really quiet Katski all week. I'm getting worried. Did something happen?" Had he been doing this all week. He knew would zone out for ages without realising. Sometimes lose the thread of what was going on but he didn't realise it was noticeable.

Katski just shrugged. Those things he'd seen were weighing on his mind heavily. It was better here then at home, were he could snuggle up to Izuku. He never had nightmares here.

Inko put hand on his shoulder and cupped his face in her hand. He lent into the touch. Slowly tears began to slip out. She swiped at the stream of tears and pressed his head into the crook of her neck. If felt so nice to be held.

He couldn't stop the noise at the back of his throat anymore. Deep gutteral sobs made their way way out his throat. He'd been keeping it inside so long it felt like built up pressure hissing it's way out his small body. Inko scooped him up and just cradled him as her cried.

Slowly he got quieter untill he began to sniffle.

"Katcchan do you want a big hug," Katski just nodded and as soon as Inko put him down Izuku collided with him.

"Honey do you want to talk about it?" Katski just shook his head. "Do you want to finish your food? It's ok if you don't." Again a shake of the head. Ok so it didn't seem like she could get any verbal answers from him today.
"Katski I'm going to put your food in the fridge is that ok, we can eat it tomorrow morning" he nodded once.

As a huddle they all shuffled towards to living room and put on an all might movie. It was nice being squeezed between the two Midoriya's. Slowly he drifted off to sleep.

___________________________________________

When his parents came home he felt a wave of guilt overtake him for wishing he was apart of a different family. His mum ruffled his head and called him her little monster. He just let let out a "tsk" but had to hide his faint smile. He did miss her.

The house still felt empty though.

It was still silent.

For the rest of the week left of the holiday he tried to spend most of it outside or at Deku's.

It was nearing the end of their pre-school time. This year they'd be going to be going to primary school. Katski was a bit nervous because school now felt harder to concentrate. They were learning how to read and write and maths. It was less about playing now he had to do well.

On his first day of primary school he and deku sticked close together. Most of it was the same from pre-school with same kids in his class. The biggest difference would be the the big kids that seemed to loom I'm hallways and he felt alot smaller then before.

Every time he'd been in class he'd find himself slowly loosing thread of conversations. It was really hard to focus on what was being said. The class room was so noisy his uniform was itchy and it was so boring. All of his so called friends that were being mean to Deku. They had all been blown up.

The teachers were useless overall when it came to defending Deku so he gotten in several arguments and fights. One teacher tried to talk about his behaviour and she had been blown up too. To be fair he didn't attack her on purpose she put her hand on his shoulder without warning him so it's not even really his fault. This all led to several parent teachers conference spanning all thought the first few months of learning. All of wich his mother would hum along agree to talk to him about his temper. After age would just hit I'm at the back of the head and tell him that she didn't have time for this and they wouldn't speak about it again. Everyone in class was now weary of him but he didn't need anyone other than Deku as a friend anyway. Overall the whole bigger school thing was a huge let down.

Images of the future still wedged permanently in his brain he realised he had to start training soon. He had to be strong enough to protect Deku. He needed be strong enough to stop what he saw.

After dark Katski snuck out of his house and began to start his journey as a hero.