Archive of Our Own

December 9th, 12:01 PM 

She does her best work at midday, when the city is at its busiest. The streets are crowded, providing the perfect opportunity for criminals to slip through the cracks. The town’s villains also have a habit of trying out their latest weapons after lunch (for reasons she still cannot fathom). She schedules her classes for the morning, when it’s still too early for your average lowlife to start causing trouble. 

This, of course, means she has to wake up before 8:00 AM on a good day. Not that it makes a difference, she just ends up patrolling whenever she has free time in light of her new job. Crime doesn’t wait for her, so she has to be prepared for her spidey-senses to flare up at any moment. 

It’s not a convenient pursuit, but someone has to do it. Might as well be Nene. 

The city below her looks like the inside of an ant hill. Civilians going about their daily lives, experiencing heartbreak, triumph, and nothing remarkable. When she’s bored, Nene likes to make up stories about them. She imagines some of them might be meeting up with their partners, while others might be late for work. She likes to get elaborate with her stories- the man purchasing a newspaper could be an undercover spy. Maybe he’s reading about an accident he caused, or one she stopped. 

She stretches out her legs to keep her blood flowing, since the heating in her suit only goes so far. The temperature is freezing this time of the year, and she can’t let it distract her. That was her biggest obstacle when she first started this gig at fifteen, she would get side-tracked from important tasks. Which was nothing new at the time, but it landed her in some pretty tough situations. 

She’s matured a lot since then, at least in some ways. Somedays, she feels like nothing’s changed at all, like she’s still the same girl she was back then. Just a little better at fighting, and her crushes sometimes look back at her. There are still moments when she feels as though she has no idea what she’s doing with her life, despite taking on a mission that requires such dedication. 

And she is dedicated, otherwise she wouldn’t be sacrificing her freetime for a city that hates her. It’s just that, at fifteen, Nene thought she’d be doing something more by now. She had big plans for herself, plans that didn’t involve splitting the bill with her best friend at a fast food restaurant. She thought she’d be in a relationship- and she kind of is, but that aspect of her life has always been complicated. The current trend among her suitors is that they either hate her, or they hate Spider-Woman. She and Spider-Woman come as a package-deal, so that makes things a little complicated. 

It’s not like her life is going poorly though, her life is going great! Couldn’t be better! Her suit smells a little because she hasn’t had time to wash it this week, but that’s fine. She’ll live, unfortunately. Really, she has nothing to complain about. She’s everybody’s (least) favorite heroine, their friendly neighborhood flop. She’s doing great. 

She’d be lying if she said she didn’t enjoy the job. Getting to beat up criminals and taunt psychotic villains is the highlight of her day, even if she occasionally returns with severe injuries. She heals fast anyways, so injuries aren’t a problem. She loves to hear the frustration in a bad guy’s voice when they realize they’re losing to a semi-sadist with dangerously few brain cells. At least that’s how the newspapers describe her, Nene doesn’t totally hate the insult. If she were only slightly more petty, she might sew it onto the back of her suit. 

If Nene had written the article, she might have referred to herself as a “broke nerd with far too many brain cells, that she only uses for quippy comebacks.” It’s a bit of a mouthful, but it’s way more accurate. 

Down below, Nene’s head is turned by the sight of a familiar violet waterfall. Aoi Akane, her best friend and roommate. They met in their first year of college, which was roughly a year and a half ago. They’re polar opposites, but similar in all the ways that matter, making them fit together like puzzle pieces. Nene has no doubt that she and Aoi are best friends in every universe- soulmates, even. 

Unlike Nene, Aoi comes from a rich family. Her mother is the CEO of Akacorp, and a mythic bitch in Nene’s humble opinion (which is the only opinion that matters here). Everywhere they go, people know Aoi, they smile and wave at her to get her attention. Nene tends to blend into the crowd, but she has more friends between the two of them, so she’s not bitter about it. She does sometimes envy Aoi’s celebrity status, but she’d never let that come between them. They need each other, for their own reasons. Nene needs someone she can count on, and Aoi needs…someone. Just one person in this world who sees her for who she is rather than who her mother is. 

At best, she’s known as the rich popular girl; and at worst, a loner with a terrible personality. Nene loves Aoi’s terrible personality though, and her rich girl bubble. Being friends with Aoi is like showing an alien around earth (a joke Aoi is tired of hearing by now, though Nene refuses to stop using it). There aren’t many people who know the real Aoi, the one that pushes people away and craves approval. It wasn’t hard to break down her walls once Nene really started to try, it seems Aoi was waiting for someone to reach out to her all along. If only they had met each other sooner, Aoi could’ve grown up with a friend to help her break out of her shell. And Nene could’ve grown up with a friend who didn’t shove her into lockers as soon as they hit middle school. 

The coolest thing to happen in Nene’s life (yes, cooler than the spider bite), is meeting two Akane Aois. Well, an Akane Aoi and an Aoi Akane. No relation, the two didn’t even know each other until Nene introduced them. Akane Aoi is Nene’s childhood best friend-turned bully-turned best friend again. Second best friend, now that she has Aoi. Akane is a jock with a passion for film bro movies, and no concept of the word “chill.” He’s either at 100 or 0, there’s no in between. Luckily, Nene is the same way, so they get along great. 

Akane and Aoi get along too now, but they’re taking baby steps since Aoi is allergic to making friends. If Nene hadn’t forced herself into Aoi’s orbit, she doubts the two of them would’ve hit it off either. 

…Nah, Nene’s too persistent. Aoi never could have kept her away. 

Nene also has two guys in her life, though that’s a subject she tends to avoid like the plague. Well, two guys and two girls. She’s in high demand this year. 

More on that later. 

Right now, Aoi’s probably headed to lunch. She’ll likely be eating alone, since Nene turned down her invite this morning. 

Guilt churns in her stomach at the memory. She’s been blowing Aoi off a lot lately. It’s nothing personal, but Spider-Woman is her first priority. She had a lot more free time during her first year of college, but she’s been collecting enemies rapidly this year for some reason. It’s like all the freshman nerds unanimously decided to become mad scientists. Because of this, she’s had to sacrifice a lot of the time she used to spend with Aoi towards protecting the city. That wouldn’t be too much of a problem if Aoi had other friends, and if she didn’t automatically assume everyone hates her. Nene can tell things have changed between them, but she doesn’t know how to bring it up. Aoi will know if she’s lying, so there’s no point in making up excuses, and Nene can’t tell her the truth. She can never bring Aoi into this, it wouldn’t be safe for her. If villains knew they were associated, they’d target Aoi to get to her. She’d rather upset Aoi than put her in danger. 

She looks good today, even from a distance. She’s wearing a white sweater with a pale blue jacket and matching blue skirt. Nene smiles fondly behind her mask. Aoi always dresses so preppy, like a true rich girl. She’s waiting on the light to turn so she can cross the street, checking her watch impatiently. So punctual. If Nene focuses enough, she can hear the impatient tapping of Aoi’s foot. 

She wonders where Aoi’s going. Is she meeting anybody? Maybe she’s made some friends. Unlikely, but that would make Nene really proud. Did she take the bus to get to this stop or did she walk? It’s not far from campus, so she probably walked. Is she lonely? Is she mad at Nene for not joining her? What’s she thinking right now? 

Nene would like to pin Aoi down to an exam table and cut her open, vivisecting her to figure out exactly what’s going on in that head of hers. She wants to see all the little things that make Aoi up, to study her under a microscope. Or maybe she just really misses her. 

The light turns, and Aoi steps out to cross the street. At that same instant, the hairs on Nene’s arms rise to brush the inside of her sleeves. A chill runs down her spine, and her fight or flight is activated. She gasps, not because of the sensations, but because Aoi is what triggered them. 

Immediately, she looks for the culprit, eyes locking in on a car that isn’t breaking. Time seems to have slowed down, the car is moving impossibly fast but it hasn’t hit Aoi yet. It’s times like this that have her thanking the universe for sending her that spider. She still has time. 

She shoots a web out, sticking one end to a lamppost. She uses that leverage to swing down, earning  a series of oohs and aahs from the crowd below her. She lands right between Aoi and the car. She does not sigh in relief when her feet hit the ground, because she still has work to do. 

Behind her, Aoi freezes, first at Spider-Woman then at the car. Nene ignores her, focusing on the task at hand. She braces herself, holding out her hands to catch the front of the car. She shoots out webs right before it hits, cushioning the crash. Her super strength allows her to be unmoved by obstacles like this, a moving vehicle is nothing more than a dodgeball to Nene. 

The driver honks, and the crowd gasps, but everyone is safe. Nene steadies the car, then waves cheerily at the driver who is currently cursing her out. 

A round of applause from some, and a string of slurs from others. This town still hates her, even when she plays the hero. 

Now, she sighs, mentally patting herself on the back for a job well done. The car can still move with the web fluid on the hood, and the webs dissolve after an hour so it won’t do any damage. The crowd hasn’t turned hostile and, most importantly, Aoi is safe. 

She turns around with a victorious smile that nobody can see due to the mask. She puts her hands on her hips, posing like Supergirl. 

“No need to thank me-” 

“You made me late.” 

Her smile falls. “Eh?” 

“I’m meeting my mother for lunch,” she explains. “I was supposed to be on that sidewalk at 12:10 in order to make it to the next street over on time. It’s 12:12 now.” 

Nene cringes at the mention of Kyouka Akane. So Aoi wasn’t just being prissy, she was impatient for a reason. Aoi’s relationship with her mother has always been a complicated one, she comes back from all their meetings looking painfully drained. 

“That’s a two minute difference.” 

“Two minutes too late,” Aoi says, bluntly. “She’s going to kill me for this.” 

She says it like she means it, and Nene doesn’t doubt she does. She feels awful, but still…

“I just saved your life.” 

“Only to send me to my grave,” she sighs. “But that’s to be expected of a vigilante.” 

“Would you call the Avengers vigilantes?” She grits her teeth. Aoi blinks at her, lost. “Nevermind, we’re crowding the crosswalk. Come with me.” 

She grabs Aoi by the elbow, ignoring her protests. A few people send them concerned looks, but nobody intervenes. Aoi’s a bit frail, and Nene has enhanced strength, so it takes little to no work to drag her onto the sidewalk. 

Once they’re safely out of the road, Nene loosens her grip, still holding onto Aoi to make sure she doesn’t run away. She has to stifle a laugh at the furious look on Aoi’s face when she turns to her. 

“-will sue you for everything you’ve got, do you hear me? Are you even listening? Do you have any idea who my mother is?” 

“Yeah, yeah,” Nene says, dismissively. “Kyouka Akane, right? It’s hard not to know who she is.”

Aoi stills. “How did you-”

“You’re very recognizable,” she needs to be more careful. “Listen, I’m very sorry for making you late. Can I make it up to you?”

She draws back. “Make it up to me how?” 

She casts a look towards the tall buildings that surround them, ones she’s grown all too familiar with. Aoi’s stop isn’t far, but if she walks there on foot, she’ll definitely be late. And Nene would prefer not to get Aoi killed anytime soon. 

“Need a ride?” 

“No,” Aoi shoves her away. “I’m not letting you sling me around the city on those fabric threads.” 

“ Webs ,” Nene corrects. “And they’re very stable, I make them myself.”

“I’d still prefer to meet my mom in one piece.” 

“C’mon,” Nene goads. “I could get you there early.” 

She pauses at that, considering. “Early?” 

“You heard me,” she flexes her arms. “Safe and early. And it’s free, courtesy of your friendly neighborhood Spider-Woman.” 

Aoi stares at her for a long time, either weighing her options or accepting the inevitable. Finally, she drops her shoulders, resigning herself. 

“Fine,” she says. “But if you drop me, I’m suing you for everything you’ve got.” 

“I think you already threatened to do that,” Nene teases. 

“I’m serious this time.” 

“I believe you,” she tugs Aoi in by her waist, eliciting a yelp from the shorter girl. “Grab on.” 

Aoi’s arms immediately circle around her shoulders, keeping her close. Suddenly, Nene’s face starts to feel a little hot beneath the mask. She hasn’t been this close to Aoi in ages, and for some reason, the contact makes her heart race. Aoi smells like lavender tea, some fancy perfume she wears every day. Nene’s used to the smell, but it’s nearly suffocating this close up. Aoi’s face is so close to her’s… 

“Well?” Aoi says, expectantly. “I don’t have all day.”

“Right,” she coughs. “Sorry.” 

She attaches a web to the top of a nearby building, using it to sling them upward. Aoi shrieks as soon as they’ve left the ground, holding on tighter. Nene tightens her hold as well, protective. It’s a bit trickier to swing with one hand, but she can manage. This is far from the first time she’s carried someone, and it won’t be the last. She’s had to carry two, even three people at once while swinging before. Though that only happens under extreme circumstances. 

Normally, this makes her feel weightless. Like she’s as free as a bird, and can go anywhere. Holding onto Aoi makes her feel grounded, it reminds her of why she does this in the first place. She’s here to protect people, because if no one else will, then it has to be Nene. Even if other people are doing the same thing, extra help never hurts. The world needs more kind people, more self-made heroes. Nene is proud to be a part of that, even if it's exhausting sometimes. She treasures these moments most of all, when she gets to help the average civilian with something mundane. Aoi is far from average, not because of her mother, but because of how much she means to Nene. In a way, that makes this all the more special. 

Aoi’s grip doesn’t loosen throughout their entire trip, and she keeps her eyes squeezed shut like she might see something horrible if she opens them. She’s terrified, and it’s adorable- only because Nene knows she’s completely safe. If she had a valid reason to be scared, Nene wouldn’t find it adorable at all. In fact, she wishes Aoi never had a valid reason to be scared. She wishes everything in Aoi’s life went exactly the way she planned. 

By the time they reach the street, Nene is almost sad to let Aoi go. It’s not as fun to spend time with her like this, since Aoi is among the many people who hate Spider-Woman. But Nene still enjoys Aoi’s company and, okay, she misses her. She knows it’s her own fault that they haven’t been spending as much time together, but she still hates it. She needs her best friend, especially now that everything in her life seems to be getting more complicated by the day. 

She lands them safely on the sidewalk, right by a strip of restaurants. She doesn’t know which Aoi is going to, but it’s bound to be one of them. 

Aoi slowly opens her eyes once she realizes they’re on the ground again, still clinging onto Nene. She looks around, observing their surroundings. Nene lets her take her time, in no rush to say goodbye. 

Eventually, Aoi does pull away, brushing the hair out of her face. 

“...Thank you.”

“Anytime.”

“You know, I was supposed to eat with my best friend today.”

A pang of guilt hits Nene’s stomach. Why is she bringing this up now? And with Spider-Woman of all people? 

“Oh?” 

“Yeah,” she keeps her eyes on the ground. “I invited her, but she’s been busy lately. Then my mom called me around an hour ago and asked if I wanted to meet.” 

Nene is silent, unsure of what to say in this situation. She’s not talking to Aoi as her best friend right now, she’s playing the role of a superhero Aoi is kind of familiar with. She can’t be too supportive, but she still has to give good advice. That’s what superheroes do, right? They make good role models, they give sitcom dad worthy speeches. That’s part of her job description. And yet, when it comes to Aoi, she can’t find the right words. 

“You two know each other, right?” Aoi mentions. “She takes pictures of you sometimes. Is everything okay with her?” 

Aoi is…worried about her? 

She doesn’t know how to feel about that. She doesn’t like when anybody worries about her, not her mom, not Amane, not Kou, not Akane, and especially not Aoi. Aoi already overthinks things enough as it is, she doesn't need to add Nene’s load to her plate. 

“Yashiro?” It feels weird to refer to herself by her own surname. “She’s as bright and peppy as ever. Just stressed with work, that’s all.” 

Aoi doesn’t look convinced. “I see.”

“Really, you shouldn’t worry about her,” Nene adds. “And also she really misses you and wants to spend time with you, she’s just very busy.” 

What is she even saying? She’s making herself sound like a total fool. 

“She didn’t used to be busy,” Aoi spits, bitterly. “I don’t know what changed.” 

So her suspicions were correct, Aoi is mad at her. She would never tell her that though, not if she knew it was Nene. Aoi would rather die a horrible death than talk about her feelings. Nene is a bit similar, only because she doesn’t want things to change between them. She likes having Aoi as her best friend, she likes the normalcy of it. Aoi has been the one consistent thing in her life recently, she doesn’t want to lose that. 

If only one thing in Nene’s life can stay the same, she hopes that will be Aoi. Wishful thinking, but can you really blame her? Her life has been unstable ever since the spider, then her dad died…she can’t deal with anything else. Nothing that major, at least. 

“I’m not sure either,” she lies. “But I know it has nothing to do with you. Nene loves you.” 

Miraculously, Aoi smiles. Not the fake smile she usually wears, but the warm one Nene is used to seeing. 

“Thanks again,” she waves as she begins to walk away. “I’ll see you around.” 

Nene exhales, feeling accomplished. She hopes that single piece of reassurance will be enough to tide Aoi over for awhile. Maybe she should bump into her more as Spider-Woman, just to check in on her. 

Why can’t she just talk to Aoi normally? They used to talk about everything, now they barely have time for each other. 

Correction: Nene barely has time for Aoi. She’s aware that she’s the problem in this situation. 

She’s been in the superhero biz for four years now, she’s used to the struggle of juggling crime-fighting with school, work, friends, and family. You know, all the things that make life worth living (she does like her job, as tough as her boss is). This mission comes at a price, and it’s one Nene has to pay if she wants to help people. 

It’s nothing new. She had to skip homecoming to fight her date’s evil father back in high school. She’s worried her poor mom to death over the years, and her dating life is looking more grim than ever. She feels secure in knowing that she’s doing the right thing, but that doesn’t make it any easier. Sacrifices have to be made for the greater good, that’s a lesson Nene learned at fifteen. 

With great power comes great responsibility

She’s suffered many losses since she became Spider-Woman, but she doesn’t want to lose Aoi. That’s a responsibility she isn’t ready to bear. She has to take care of people in other ways too, Aoi’s emotional safety is important just as her physical safety is. It doesn’t have to be anything grand, just a simple thing to remind Aoi that they’re still friends. 

She’ll carve out time to grab lunch with Aoi tomorrow. She can stand to sacrifice an hour or two of patrolling. Aoi deserves more effort than that, but that’s all Nene can give her for now. Maybe someday, things will be easier, and they’ll look back on this as a small rough patch in what turned out to be a lifelong friendship. Maybe she can fix things with Aoi just like she fixed things with Akane, only this time she’s the one who needs to apologize. 

She’ll do it, and they’ll be okay. Nene isn’t going to let Aoi slip away from her, not that easily. She’ll give Aoi the best lunch date of her life tomorrow. 

She takes a deep breath, shoots another web, and wishes life were less complicated. 

~

December 10th, 1:24 PM 

“-and then she asked me if I wanted a ride, can you believe that? I thought I was dreaming.” 

“Wow, she really said that?” 

“I came close to giving her a piece of my mind,” Aoi leans forward on her elbows. “But then she said she could get me there early. So…”

Nene gasps. “You didn’t.” 

“I did,” Aoi smiles. 

They’re sitting at a counter in their favorite cafe, facing a window that looks out onto the street. Nene loves this spot because she gets to people-watch while she eats; Aoi likes it because she gets to sit next to Nene. A perfect compromise. 

The look on Aoi’s face when Nene asked her to lunch this morning is something the latter will never forget. She can tell Aoi really missed her, because the simple offer left the woman awestruck. It made her feel twice as bad for being so flighty, but she’s hoping this will make up for lost time. It’s the least she can do. 

She hadn’t anticipated having to listen to Aoi recount her adventures with Spider-Woman, thus testing Nene’s acting skills. Thankfully, Aoi seems too caught up in her story to notice how tight Nene’ smile is. She hasn’t mentioned her mom, and it seems she has no intention of doing so. Nene would be a hypocrite if she were bitter about being lied to. In all fairness though, she never claimed to not be a hypocrite. 

“What was it like?” 

“To be honest? It was kinda fun.” 

Nene nearly chokes on her iced coffee, having not anticipated that answer. Aoi certainly hadn’t looked like she was having fun from Nene’s point of view. 

“Really?”

“Yeah,” her eyes are thoughtful. “I thought I was going to die, but it was thrilling. And when we landed, I felt accomplished. Like if I survived a trip that terrifying, I could survive anything.” 

Nene’s heart swells with pride knowing that she was the one who made Aoi feel that way. Somedays, Aoi makes her feel just as brave, so she’s happy to return the favor. 

“That sounds amazing,” she rests her face on her palm, gazing at Aoi affectionately. 

“You would’ve loved it,” Aoi nudges her in the side. “You’re not scared of anything.”

That’s not true, Nene is scared of many things. She’s scared of the people she loves getting hurt, and of not being able to save everybody, and she’s still a little scared of the Kool-Aid Man. She’s not scared of many things, but she knows the invasive feeling of fear far too well. 

“I wish I could swing around on webs like that,” she says instead. “I’d never be late to class.”

Oh, the irony. “Swinging around on webs” is the exact reason she’s late to class everyday. It’s also the reason she was five minutes late meeting Aoi today, she had to help an old lady get her cat out of a tree. Not exactly an emergency, but she has a soft spot for animals, being the proud mother of a hamster herself. 

“Please,” Aoi scoffs. “You’d slam face-first into a building.”

It takes every ounce of self-control Nene has not to spill everything right there just to prove Aoi wrong. With great power comes great responsibility, with great power comes great responsibility, with great power comes great responsibility- 

“I can’t even walk straight,” she laughs. “Which isn’t much of a shocker, I can’t do anything straight.” 

Aoi breaks into a fit of giggles, hiding her mouth behind her hand. She always laughs too hard at Nene’s jokes, much to Nene’s amusement. 

“You’re doing something straight right now,” Aoi gives her a pointed look. 

Nene’s stomach sinks, smile dropping. She suddenly becomes very interested in her fries, staring at them like they hold the world’s greatest secret. 

“C’mon,” Aoi goads. “You’re really not gonna tell me about him? You used to love talking about guys.” 

That’s a total lie, Aoi hated when Nene talked about guys; although she’d never admit it. Nene doesn’t get why she’s asking about this now , when it’s the last thing Nene wants to discuss. 

“I’m not going something straight ,” Nene corrects. “I’m doing something bisexual . There’s a difference.”

“Right, sorry,” Aoi shifts. “Now, are you gonna tell me about him?” 

There’s a certain sadness to her expression that’s impossible to miss. Aoi will always try to hide her true feelings, but she can’t get anything past Nene. Someday they’re going to have to get to the bottom of Aoi’s jealousy issues. She hates it when Nene hangs out with other people, be it friends or boyfriends. Anytime Nene tries to reassure Aoi, she’s met with abrupt denial. Hell will freeze over before Aoi talks about her feelings. 

Nene lets out a heavy sigh, relenting. “We’re avoiding each other.” 

Aoi perks up, barely trying to hide her delight. “Why?” 

Her shoulders tense at the memory. Shouting in each other’s faces on a balcony, questions of why won’t you just talk to me? and what are you hiding from me? Kou is more straightforward than Aoi is, he doesn’t let Nene get away with anything. It’s part of what Nene likes about him, they’re both ridiculously stubborn. Perfect for each other in every way. 

Except Kou hates Spider-Woman, and Nene…well, you get the picture. 

“I met his family last weekend,” Nene explains. “And his older brother is a cop. You can imagine how well that went over.” 

Aoi cringes. “What’s your problem with cops?”

“Have you ever met a cop?” Nene narrows her eyes. “Nevermind, your mother probably has an army of them at her beck and call.” 

“Knock it off,” Aoi gives her a light shove. “What did you say to the poor guy’s brother?” 

“Nothing,” she mutters. Aoi gives her another look. “Fine, I may have told him to shove his taser up his ass.” 

“ Nene! ”

“You wouldn’t blame me if you knew the guy.”

“Captain Minamoto, right? I’ve met him.” 

“Really?”

“He’s been at some of my family’s events,” she takes a bite of her salad. “Plus, he’s practically a celebrity. It’s hard not to know him.” 

“Completely unwarranted attention by the way,” Nene scowls. “His only redeeming quality is that he’s easy on the eyes.” 

“He’s your boyfriend’s brother.” 

“I can multitask,” she dodges the next shove Aoi aims her way. “Enough about me, what about you? Any guys in your life?” 

Predictably, Aoi tenses. That’s another thing Aoi can’t hide from Nene, her lack of interest in men. Nene has no plans of bringing it up until Aoi’s ready to talk about it, but she sometimes worries that that time will never come. Aoi appears to be deep in denial, no doubt thanks to her mother’s high expectations. Nene wishes she could find some way to reach out to her without backing her into a corner. 

If Aoi did like guys, she would have plenty of opportunities to find a boyfriend. She may not have friends, but she’s popular in her own right. The town’s Beauty Queen, wanted by every man or woman who looks her way. Nene completely understands the fuss, Aoi is drop dead gorgeous. If Kou wasn’t in the picture, and if Aoi was more honest with herself, they would probably be dating right now. 

She quickly shakes that thought from her head, trying not to notice how nice Aoi looks in her plain white button-down. She has a boyfriend, she shouldn’t be thinking like that. Sure, she’s prone to flirting here and there, but there are lines she would never cross. Besides, what Aoi needs is a friend, not another dumbass to drool over her. 

“Akane asked me out last week.” 

For a second, Nene is sure her spidey-senses have been activated. She sees red, grip tightening on her plastic cup. The world moves in slow motion, except for her heart, which runs a marathon. 

“What?” 

“I turned him down,” she says quickly. “Do you remember that party we went to? Well, you left me alone at the snack table for a while and he came over and…” 

“And?” 

“Calm down,” Aoi laughs. “Why are you so mad? Do you wanna date him?”

Nene nearly pukes. “Akane? Gross, he’s like my brother.” 

“Then why are you getting so heated?”

“I’m not heated,” she snaps. “I just don’t like it when creepy guys bug you. Akane’s the type of guy who only wants one thing.”

That couldn’t be farther from the truth, but Nene will say anything to make sure those two never pair up. It would be a match made in Hell, she can’t sit by and watch that happen. Even worse, she’d be responsible for it since they met through her. She doesn’t want to be part of a story they tell their children someday. If anything ever happened between Aoi and Akane, Nene would like to have the plausible deniability of saying she had nothing to do with it. 

Aoi’s face scrunches up. “I’m glad I turned him down then. It wasn’t anything serious, he just asked me if I wanted to hang out sometime and I told him I’m using this time to focus on my studies.” 

She wonders how long Aoi plans to keep using that excuse. Eventually, people will start to get suspicious. 

That’s a mean thought, Aoi’s personal life isn’t any of her business. She would like it to be her business, but it’s not. 

“How did he react?”

“He understood, he said we’re better off as friends.”

Nene couldn’t agree more. She’ll have to track Akane down and ask him what his intentions are, maybe rough him up like he used to do to her in high school. She never fought back before because she didn’t want to out herself as Spider-Woman, but if they went somewhere private…Akane would never admit to being beat up by a girl. And even if he did tell, nobody would believe him. Nene looks so small compared to him, and he’s an athlete whereas she’s just a measly photographer. She could get away with it. 

Why is she thinking like that? Akane is her friend, she doesn’t want to hurt him. He didn’t even do anything wrong, he just asked out a girl he likes. That’s completely normal. It would be one thing if he was pushy, or tried to force Aoi to go out with him, but he handled rejection perfectly. Nene has no reason to be mad at him, let alone beat him up. No wonder people call her a sadist. 

“I can’t picture you two together,” she says. “You’re so different.” 

“Unlike you and Kou.” 

It’s true, Nene and Kou becoming a couple is probably the least surprising thing to happen this century. They’re both overly optimistic and aggressive, along with being admittedly clueless but well-meaning. They’re both (apparently) sadistic, which Nene doesn’t totally hate. She would let Kou punch her in the face if he asked; which will probably never happen, he’s way too much of a gentleman for that. 

“On second thought, don’t they say opposites attract?”

“I’m sure you guys will work things out,” Aoi comforts. 

“I hope you’re right.” 

And she really does. Against all odds, Nene likes Kou, maybe even loves him. If things weren’t so complicated, she’s sure they could be very happy together. Maybe they still can, if Nene gets her shit together. 

Sometimes, Nene worries that she’ll never be able to have a normal life. It’s already a struggle to balance Spider-Woman with everything else, she can’t imagine doing this when she’s married with kids. And she would like to get married someday, Kou would make a good husband. Even if it’s not with him, Nene would like to find someone to spend the rest of her life with. But is that even possible? If she married someone, she’d probably have to tell them about Spider-Woman. That would put her spouse in danger for the rest of their lives.

Maybe by then, she’ll have all this figured out. She’ll be older and wiser, and she’ll have all the answers. Then again, she wished for the same thing at fifteen. Do things ever get easier?

“Boys are too complicated,” Nene frowns. “Let’s talk about something else. What are you doing for your birthday?” 

Aoi turns twenty in three days, an event Nene has been looking forward to for weeks. Last year, Aoi’s mother threw her a huge banquet. It was far from Aoi’s taste, but she and Nene ended up sneaking off and hanging out in her garden all night. They shared a bottle of overpriced wine while stuffing their faces full of snacks Nene couldn’t pronounce the names of. It’s a memory she’ll cherish for the rest of her life, especially the part where she fell asleep in Aoi’s bed at 3:00 AM. They slept with lots of space between them, but it still felt pleasantly intimate. 

The best part had been getting Aoi to laugh after a night of fake smiles. Nene could tell Aoi was uncomfortable the whole time, and she imagines all her birthdays have been like that. But she was able to remind Aoi that she doesn’t have to be alone anymore, that she has someone who won’t let her stay sad on her birthday. They both laughed so much that night, Nene thought she would never stop. She thinks about that party a lot, mostly on days where she misses being that close to Aoi. It motivates her to get through her hardest battles. 

Aoi’s face falls. Uh-oh. Nene doesn’t need spidey-senses to tell her she touched a nerve. 

“Actually, I wanted to talk to you about that,” Aoi starts. “I spoke to my mother yesterday, she said she’ll be away on a business trip this weekend. So there won’t be a party this year.” 

That’s…shit, Nene doesn’t even know what to say. She hates Kyouka for treating her best friend this way. She wishes she could rewrite reality and give Aoi a better childhood, with a loving mother who treats her like a person instead of a prop. If only she had a more useful superpower, she could make the world a better place for Aoi. 

“I’m so sorry,” she rests a hand on Aoi’s shoulder. “Will you be okay?”

“Honestly? I’m looking forward to it,” she beams. “This is the first year I get to do what I want for my birthday.” 

Nene returns Aoi’s smile, relieved. “What do you want to do? We can go anywhere.” 

“I haven’t thought about it yet, I want to be spontaneous.” 

“Spontaneous?” Nene raises an eyebrow. “Who are you and what did you do with my best friend?”

Aoi swats her hand away. “I’m plenty spontaneous.” 

“Sure,” she grins. “You make the plans then, I’ll be yours for the day.” 

Her face reddens at her own phrasing, but she chooses not to comment on it. On the bright side, Aoi blushes too, which Nene will be thinking about for the rest of the week. 

She’ll take the day off for Aoi, even if it puts her at an inconvenience. She can carry her suit with her, or wear it under her clothes so that she’s prepared if there’s an emergency. But she’s not going to let Aoi be alone for her birthday- it’s the least she can do. 

Nene can’t remember the last time she took the day off. They won’t have class either, so they’ll have the entire day to themselves. A full day of walking around the city with Aoi sounds like a dream. They haven’t hung out together like that in so long, Nene misses it. Maybe this will be the thing that fully repairs their friendship. 

Her phone dings, a message from her boss. Panic shoots through her as she realizes the time- 2:00 PM. She was supposed to come into work an hour early today. Tsuchigomori is going to kill her. 

“I have to go.”

“What?”

Guilt gnaws at her stomach upon seeing the disappointed look on Aoi’s face. She’d told her they would have more time. 

“I’m sorry,” she pulls Aoi into an awkward side hug. “I forgot my boss wanted me to come into work early today. I’ll make it up to you, I swear.”

“Make it up to me how?” 

She pauses, thinking. 

“I’ll get you the best birthday gift you could ever ask for.” 

“You better,” Aoi crosses her arms. “Want me to get the check?” 

“Absolutely not,” Nene pulls out her wallet, laying down enough money to cover her check. “Honestly, I don’t know why you bother asking.” 

“Worth a shot,” she shrugs. “You know I’m always happy to help out.” 

“I appreciate it, but I don’t need your help. I can take care of these things myself.” 

“So stubborn.” 

Nene was raised to be self-sufficient, she’s too proud to accept charity; especially from a rich girl like Aoi. Nothing personal, of course, Nene adores Aoi. But the day she starts taking hand-outs from billionaires will be the day pigs fly. 

She waves goodbye to Aoi and heads out, still feeling somewhat guilty for leaving early. She’ll have to brainstorm ideas for what to get her. Perhaps she was being a bit ambitious with her promise, but she’s not one to back down. 

She’s going to make this the best birthday of Aoi’s life. 

~

December 11th, 3:07 PM 

“Get me pictures of Spider-Woman!”

Tsuchigomori’s voice rang throughout the office, making everybody on the top two floors of the building flinch. The man behind her drops his stack papers, and immediately races to pick them up. Even Nene- witty, cool, invincible Nene- shrinks back, wishing the ground would swallow her up. 

“Y-yes sir.”

If any of her villains ever heard her stutter like that, she’d never be able to show her face in public again. 

“And none of these half-assed, sorry excuses for photography. Real, high-quality pictures.” 

Nene cast a sad glance to the rejected folder that’s been pushed her way. She worked hard on those pictures, carved out a whole afternoon to take them. She turned down a party invite to get them done, as well as an offer to stop by her mother’s place for dinner. More hard work, down the drain. 

“I won’t let you down.”

“I know you won’t,” he takes a drag from his cigar. “Because if you do, you’ll be out on the streets begging for a job again.” 

She gets that threat on a daily basis, yet it never becomes less terrifying. She was working a pizza delivery job before Tsuchigomori hired her…dark times. She also really doesn’t want to have to ask her mom for money. 

“I’ll have them done by Friday.” 

He puts his cigar out, throwing a mean glare her way. She jumps slightly, urging her spidey-sense not to go off. 

“Good. Now get out of my face.”

The camera flash goes off right on time, catching the sight of a beloved heroine perched on the side of a building. Her suit is white with seafoam accents, which looks far too bright under certain lighting. Nene always picks shaded areas to take her pictures, even if those locations wind up being less exciting. The quality makes up for the lack of action. 

She swings over to the wall diagonal from her, plucking the camera out of its web to check the picture. Even as she lands, she tries to keep some movement going in her legs and arms to prevent herself from getting too cold. The weather wouldn’t be so bad if she didn’t have to do a photoshoot. 

Aoi prefers cold weather, one of their many differences. Nene lives for summer, Aoi was born to exist in winter. Total opposites. 

Nene scowls at the device in her hands, realizing she had the camera slanted too far to the left. She lets out a huff, repositioning it. 

Fuck this camera. Fuck her job, fuck her boss, fuck Spider-Woman, fuck everything. Nene’s not usually one to swear (at least not strongly), but anything related to work makes her curse like a sailor. Photography used to be something she enjoyed, something she was good at. Now look where she is; retaking pictures she already fucking turned in yesterday because her boss deemed them “half-assed” with no further explanation. 

How did she end up here? Does she really need a job that badly? She’s the (admittedly despised) hero of the city, and she’s letting her boss bully her. She’s better than this, she makes despicable villains cower beneath her. A bitchy boss should be the least of her concerns. 

…Come to think of it, she’d rather take her chances with Doc Ock than talk back to Tsuchigomori. 

She swings back over to the wall she’s chosen as her background, adjusting her hood to make sure the movement didn’t mess up its placement. It’s designed to resist wind, but it’s still a lousy piece of fabric. And if she has to retake this set of pictures one more time, she’s going to kill herself. 

She crouches on the side of the building, gazing off to the side. She waits an agonizing number of seconds for the flash to go off, indicating that the picture has been taken. This time, when she goes to check the picture, it finally looks decent. More than decent, it’s exactly what she wanted. Tsuchigomori will love this. 

She relaxes her shoulders, allowing herself a temporary moment of relief. If she can get the rest of them to turn out like this, she won’t have to worry about getting fired anytime soon. Maybe she can even get this done early and be home in time to watch a movie with Aoi. 

The thought makes a warm feeling spread throughout her chest. It had been nice to catch up with Aoi yesterday, even if they didn’t have much time. Aoi’s still acting weird- possibly because Nene left early. She has a habit of taking everything to heart, and interpreting even their neutral interactions as Nene hating her. It’s not something Nene usually minds, she has no problem reassuring Aoi when she starts to have doubts. It’s only become an obstacle recently, since Nene has lost the energy to smile the way she once did. It’s hard to make other people believe everything will turn out okay when she’s still having to convince herself. 

Speaking of Aoi, she still needs to find her a birthday gift. Not just any gift, the best gift she could ever ask for. She’ll worry about how the hell she’s going to pull that off after she finds time in her schedule to go shopping. She may be a little in over her head here. 

She’ll figure something out though, because this is Aoi, and Aoi deserves it. Nene is a woman of her word, she’s not going to disappoint her best friend on her birthday. 

What would Aoi even like? More preppy sweaters? Another houseplant? No, it has to be something she doesn’t already own. Something she’s never gotten to have…like a library card. 

She quickly shakes that thought from her head. She needs to be serious about this, she doesn’t have a lot of time. In any case, she’s getting sidetracked. If she doesn’t get these pictures turned in by tomorrow, she’ll be out of a job. She can worry about Aoi later. 

She gets to work on the rest of the pictures, staying in the same area but mixing up her backgrounds to give them some variety. She takes more than she needs to, just to have some options in case she later decides she doesn’t like the main ones. It takes longer, but she’s not in the position to be taking any risks. Better safe than sorry, even if that viewpoint goes against everything she’s ever done. Her day job doesn’t allow the same level of recklessness that Spider-Woman does. 

Tsuchigomori likes pictures with more drama, pictures that indicate a darker side to the sunny hero. If it were up to Nene, they’d only publish the somewhat corny, superhero-posed pictures. The ones that make her look like Supergirl or Wonder Woman. The Avengers get to pose cheesy all the time, so why can’t she? 

Because this city already has the Avengers and the Fantastic Four, heroes people generally like . Nene is more like an unofficial X-Men, hated by all despite their best efforts. Her non-mutant status excludes her from experiencing that level of hate at least; though she also can’t prove that she’s not a mutant, not unless she reveals her identity (which isn’t an option). Anyway, she doesn’t do teams, she’s too independent for that. She’d rather suffer the consequences of not having a PR team than have to wear matching uniforms. 

Out of sheer stubbornness, she takes a few cheesy ones. She makes sure to get some angstier shots too, because she still needs money. She refuses to take any sexy ones, because independent or not, she deserves to be taken as seriously as any male hero. 

Although…there is a certain green-haired cat burglar who might appreciate a shot like that. 

She smacks the side of her head. Bad spider, bad. You have a boyfriend. 

It takes her about three hours to get the pictures done, mainly due to the amount of times she gets distracted with something else. This is what her work process normally looks like, both in photography and in school. She is physically incapable of getting anything done without giving herself multiple breaks in between. It helps to recharge her mind, otherwise she’d never get anything done. 

She’s in the midst of collecting her things, ready to turn in for the night, when she hears a noise from down below. Normally, she’d shrug it off as an argument, but her spidey-senses flare up. Not a good sign. 

Her stomach sinks when she looks down, catching the familiar sight of brown hair. Amane Yugi, one of the first friends she made at college. He’s surrounded by four men who have followed him down the alley, all closing in on him with hostility. 

“That coat looks nice,” one of them says. “Hand it over.” 

Something dark and protective builds inside Nene’s chest. She’s always had a soft spot for Amane, in the same way she has a soft spot for Aoi. She knows he comes from a bad family, and that he’s trying so hard to build a better future for himself. He’s an aspiring model, so Nene gets to see his face every time she swings past the dental billboard. She likes that face, and she would hate to see it disfigured by any of these lowlifes. 

“I don’t want any trouble,” Amane struggles to keep his voice steady. “If you’re looking for money, you’re asking the wrong guy.”

“I’ve seen your face before,” the second guy speaks up. “You’re the pretty boy in that dentist ad.” 

“You’re thinking of my brother,” he lies. “We’re twins so we get mixed up a lot.” 

“You’ll take us to him then,” the third one says. 

Amane’s shaking, eyes wide with fear. He doesn’t look like he can fight, especially not four people at once. Nene will have to step in. 

“Maybe another day…” 

“Stop wasting our time,” the fourth one barks. “Either take us to your brother or fork over everything you have on. I’m sure that watch is worth something.” 

Nene chooses that exact moment to swing in, kicking the first man in the back of the neck. He falls forward, choking. He’ll need a neck brace, and may need to get checked for a concussion. 

The other three tense up at the sudden action, getting into defensive stances. It’s almost cute how they all think they stand a chance. Not one of them tries to run, choosing to face the danger head-on. Nene admires their confidence, but she is stronger. 

She drops to the ground when she lands, sweeping the leg of the third man hard enough to break it. She doesn’t kill, but she has no rule against badly mangling people. Especially when someone she cares about is involved. 

The fourth man steps up to fight her, all brave and heated. 

“Who the fuck do you think you are?” He shouts. “Stay out of this.” 

“Aww,” she shoots up, decking him in the face. She grabs his wrist and twists his arm behind his back, effectively dislocating his shoulder. “Is someone grumpy? Sounds like it’s past your bedtime. Guess I’ll have to put you to sleep then.” 

She rams his head into a nearby wall, knocking him out. Perhaps she was a little too harsh with him. Oh well, he shouldn't have yelled at Amane. 

The second man backs away, pointing a knife at her. “Stay back! I have a weapon.” 

“Oh no,” she puts her hands up. “Not a small knife! That’s my one weakness, it’s small knives.” 

She shoots out a web, binding his wrists together. Then she lunges forward, knocking him into a wall and shooting three more webs to keep him there. 

“Those dissolve in an hour,” she informs. “Which will give the police plenty of time to find you. Speaking of which…”

She shoots a couple more webs, sticking the other three men to the ground just in case one of them tries to escape. 

“There we go,” she claps. “Can’t have one of you little rascals running off.” 

She grabs the knife out of Number Two’s hands, pocketing it. She likes to collect the weapons that are used against her, thinking of them as souvenirs. It’s a tradition she started the first time she got stabbed, all she could focus on when she removed the knife was how pretty it was. That, and the feeling of satisfaction knowing she survived something so painful. 

“I’ll be taking that,” she turns to Amane, feeling somewhat guilty for being so brutal. She probably traumatized the poor guy. 

When her eyes find him, however, he doesn’t look scared. Quite the opposite, he looks…impressed? Relieved? Honored? She doesn’t know what to make of his expression, lips parted and eyes soft. It reminds her of the way Kou sometimes looks at her, like she hung the moon. 

She approaches him slowly, surprised when he doesn’t flinch back. Looking at him up-close like this feels hauntingly familiar. He doesn’t know they were studying together in the library just the other day, or that he once lent her his coat to wear when it was raining. She still has that coat, buried in a pile underneath her bed. She doesn’t know why she hasn’t returned it, perhaps she doesn’t want to let the memory go just yet. 

He looks entranced, barely even blinking as his eyes follow her. Something about it makes her uncomfortable, like she shouldn’t be here. She and Amane have always had chemistry, but this would be the worst time to act on it. She needs to focus on getting back to normal with Aoi. And she has a boyfriend. 

Why didn’t she think of Kou first? 

They stare at each other for a few moments, as though neither of them is completely sure the other is real. Nene feels that if she reaches her hand out to touch him, Amane might turn to dust. 

She clears her throat, breaking the silence. “Are you okay?” 

“What?” He blinks, like he wasn’t expecting her to speak. “Um, yes, I’m fine. That was incredible.” 

The mask hides her blush, a small grace. “Oh, that was nothing. I mean, I was just doing my job.” 

Great, now she sounds like an obnoxious bragger. No wonder people hate her, she hates herself too sometimes. 

“We’ve met before,” he sounds like he’s been waiting his whole life to tell her this. 

“Really?” 

She tries to think back, but she’s saved a lot of people. After a certain point, they start to blend together.” 

“Yeah,” he starts, excitedly. “Well, I first saw you when I was fifteen. You swung by my window and I thought you were the coolest. Then you saved me when my high school caught on fire.” 

A burning school…

Nene gasps. “I remember you! You were the guy with the twin brother.” 

In retrospect, a cafeteria fire in which no one died is one of her tamest feats. Still, she can’t believe she forgot Amane. She always thought something about him was familiar, but she’d been sure she would’ve remembered his face. 

Amane attended the high school next to hers, so they just barely missed each other. News spread fast in their town, so she heard about the fire just in time to get over there and make sure everyone was okay. She’s glad she did, because young Amane was trapped in one of the bathrooms when it happened. 

His brother grabbed her arm as soon as she arrived, ordering her to go look for him even when the authorities advised against it. She’s never had much respect for cops, so she walked through the fire to find Amane. When she found him, he was curled into a ball on the bathroom floor, underneath the sinks. She never would’ve guessed that nerdish kid would grow up to be a model. 

“You carried me bridal-style out of the building,” Amane laughs at the window. “The guys at school never let me live that down.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t be, it was the best thing that ever happened to me,” his face turns red. “I mean, everyone wants to meet a superhero, right? It gave me a cool story to tell. I guess what I’m trying to say is I’ve always been a fan.” 

Nene beams underneath her mask. It feels amazing to know that at least one person is fond of both Nene Yashiro and Spider-Woman. She considers this an accomplishment, she has a real fan- and it’s Amane! 

Still, something about this feels wrong, for many reasons. She’d been planning to get home early and spend time with Aoi, and now she’s getting distracted talking to Amane. He’s making her blush and giving her butterflies, when she should be crammed into Aoi’s twin-sized bed watching a horror movie right now. 

That raises an even bigger concern, one Nene wouldn’t touch with a ten-foot pole. Why does it feel like she’s cheating on Aoi and not Kou? 

Woah, she needs to take a few steps back. She’s not cheating on anybody right now. All she’s doing is having a conversation with a fan. She’s still a perfectly loyal girlfriend, and she’s going to call Kou after this. She’s put it off long enough, and she needs to get her priorities straight. 

“I appreciate that,” she says, kindly. “I don’t meet a lot of fans.”

“You’ll get there eventually,” he reassures. “People just need to realize that you’re a hero.” 

That sums things up pretty well, the public seems convinced that Spider-Woman only exists to cause chaos. Every story is spun to make it look like she’s the one starting fights rather than finishing them. They call her a vigilante, a semi-sadist. She’d like to say it doesn’t get to her, but it’s getting harder to let the insults roll off her back. She wishes there were more people like Amane in the world. 

“Thanks,” she mutters. “Can you get home safely?” 

She hopes he doesn’t ask for a ride. That’s her and Aoi’s thing. 

“I’ll be fine,” he smiles. “This doesn’t happen often.” 

“I hope not,” she laughs. “I’ve already saved you twice, let’s hope there’s not a third time.” 

“I wouldn’t mind meeting you again.” 

She really wishes he hadn’t said that. It may not be his intention, but he’s complicating things. Even worse, she doesn’t know who to think of to distract herself from his kind smile and soft eyes. 

“I’m always around,” she puts her hands on her hips, the classic Supergirl pose. “Speaking of which, I’d better be going. Lots of crime late at night. Remember to call the cops, unless you want these bastards to get away.” 

“Right,” he looks down. “I’ll give them a call. I didn’t mean to keep you. I’ll see you around.”

“Yeah,” she breathes. “See you around.” 

She swings back up to collect her bag from the top of the building, then she tries to get as far from Amane as possible. Since when did she become so popular? She shouldn’t have so many people trying to take her out at once. 

Maybe she’s the one making things complicated, she can never just say “I have a boyfriend.” Not that she would ever betray Kou, but even the possibility makes her feel massively guilty. She needs to stick to one guy at a time. 

She knows she’s greedy, but she likes the attention. She got bullied a lot in high school, and every time she tried to ask someone out they laughed in her face. All she ever wanted was to be loved, to have someone treat her like a princess. Now she has that from one too many people, and she clings to the validation like it’s the single IV pumping life into her veins. 

She would never cheat on Kou, but is it really so wrong to flirt every now and then? There has to be a line, a certain point when playful flirting becomes emotional cheating. What she did just now wasn’t emotional cheating, but what about Aoi? 

No, she’s overthinking this too much. Aoi is a friend, nothing more. She’s pretty, spiteful, intelligent, lonely, and everything Nene is not. They cling together because they fulfill each other’s missing qualities. They love each other, but only as friends. They can’t be anything more. 

And Nene likes Kou, she really does. He’s so similar to her, and they have a lot of fun together. She doesn’t want to lose that, not for Aoi or anyone else. She’s not going to cross any lines, and she’s not going to do anything that might hurt him. She’s going to do what a hero does, and fix this mess. 

She waits until her nerves have calmed down to pick up the phone, resting on a familiar rooftop. She lets her legs swing off the side of the building, unafraid of gravity. Funnily enough, she used to be scared of heights. Now, heights are her best friend. She feels most comfortable when she’s close to the sky. 

She lets out a heavy sigh as she opens the contact, finger hovering over the call button. 

Will he even pick up? What if he never wants to speak to her again? 

The thought is terrifying, but she’ll never know if she doesn’t call. She needs to stop fooling around and fix the best (only) relationship she’s ever had. 

She brings her finger down, hitting call. The phone rings three times before a voice comes through from the other end of the line. 

“Nene?” 

“Hey, Kou,” she sucks in a breath. “Can we talk?” 

~

December 12th, 10:35 AM

She doesn’t have classes on Friday, which clears up her schedule enough to have breakfast with her mom. It’s become a tradition, so they can keep in touch amidst their equally busy lives. Keeping up with her roommate is hard enough, finding time to spend time with her mother who lives in another town is a whole other ballpark. 

Living on her own is exciting, but Nene misses this house. Every corner of it is dusted with specs of her childhood, like a Christmas tree full of ornaments she’s collected over the years. The couch cushions are sunken in after years of use, because her mom has been procrastinating on buying a new one for the past five years. The paint is peeled on one spot of the wall due to the time Nene used tape to hang a flier there (to remind herself to study for exams). The kitchen table is littered with junk because they always eat in the living room. The carpet is stained with various shades of brown from the amount of times Nene or her mom spilled a cup of coffee. 

She wouldn’t change any of it; in fact, she hopes her mom never moves. This house is Nene’s safe space, a consistency to return to whenever the world gets scary. Lately, life has become too large for her to bear. Coming back here feels like laying in her mom’s arms after a long day of school, or laughing with her dad on the car ride to the library. 

The hallway is covered with pictures, a museum of her life. A few of the pictures include Nene before she discovered herself; her mom had asked her explicit permission to keep them up, and Nene really didn’t mind. They’re a part of her life, and there aren’t many of them anyway. Most of the pictures are from middle school onward, when Nene started to grow her hair out and wear flowy dresses. Her parents were overjoyed to find out they had a daughter, and they insisted on documenting every big moment; which, to them, was every moment. Nene had initially been annoyed with it, but looking back, she’s glad to have so many memories frozen in time. 

She stops by one of her and Akane when they were six years old. Well, she was six and he was seven. They’re playing in the sandbox that’s still in Akane’s backyard, now overgrown with weeds and fungus. Akane’s smiling at the camera, and Nene’s smiling at Akane. 

A pang hits her chest as a flood of painful memories resurface. They wore matching friendship necklaces that year, despite Akane’s insistence that boys didn’t do that. She still has hers in a jewelry box in her childhood bedroom, one she doesn’t use anymore. She wonders if Akane kept his. 

“That’s one of my favorites.” 

Her mother’s voice floats behind her like the scent of fresh pie from the kitchen. It wraps her up in a blanket, holding her close. 

“Why?” She turns around. “I had dirt on my nose.” 

Her mom smiles. “The best pictures are the ones taken in the moment.” 

As a photographer, that’s something Nene knows to be true. Some of her best pictures have been taken at the last minute, or even by accident. When a picture is too posed, it doesn’t look authentic. You capture so much more life when you aren’t prepared. 

Over the years, her mom has taken many pictures of Nene while she’s simply sitting on the couch or strolling down the sidewalk. She seemed completely enamored with her daughter as she is, treating her not unlike the hero Nene aims to be. There’s no one else in the world who could love her so unconditionally, and Nene will never be able to repay her for that. 

She’s been there for her through every failed test and rejected confession. She was there for her when Akane started bullying her, and when her dad died. That was a terrible time for both of them, but it ended up bringing them closer. Nene would trade that closeness to have her dad back, but she’s still grateful for it. Maybe she should feel guilty for that, but two things can be true at once. 

She looks back at the picture. Things were so much simpler back then, even if they were complicated in other ways. They still didn’t have much money, and Nene knew so little about herself, but she never worried about anything. Or maybe she did, but those worries seem so small in contrast to what she’s dealing with now. A six-year-old's problems are still serious to them, but Nene would give anything to be that small for one more day. To play with Akane in his backyard and come home to her dad making dinner. 

She learned what Akane’s hands felt like before she knew the feeling of his fists. Small and clasped inside her own, swinging between them as they walked. They may have fixed things, but they don’t hold hands anymore. The last time Akane touched her was when he was holding her hair back while she threw up at a party. That closeness they once knew as children has long-since left them, replaced with a canyon of distance. 

Perhaps that’s why she’s so desperate to keep Aoi. She’s already had experience losing one best friend, she knows how damaging that can be. Even though they worked things out, things will never be the same between them. Just the thought of that happening to her and Aoi is enough to make her nauseous 

Her mother rests a hand on her shoulder. “What’s wrong?” 

Nene sighs. “It’s hard to explain.” 

“You’ll feel better if you talk about it,” she offers. “Come sit down.” 

Nene follows her to the living room, which is just as unkempt as the last time she saw it. The coffee table is covered in bills and newspapers, and one of the chairs is carrying out its duty as a makeshift laundry basket. 

She can’t help but smile at the familiar sight, making herself comfortable on the pale blue couch. She folds her legs beneath herself, facing her mom who sits down beside her. 

They used to talk for hours like this. Some nights, Nene would spend hours crying about gender dysphoria, anxiety, or bullying while her mom ran her fingers through her hair. Other times, they would gossip about all the people they didn’t like to deal with. They spent a great deal of time here after her dad passed, crying into each other's arms or putting on a movie to distract themselves. This couch holds cherished memories, both the painful and pleasant ones. 

“By the way,” her mom says. “Your grandma called last night, she wants to see you. She thinks we’ve been avoiding her.”

Nene snorts. “She always says that.” 

“Well, she doesn’t have long left,” her mom quotes in a mocking voice. “Someday, we’ll regret not spending time with her.” 

“You’re horrible,” Nene laughs. “She didn’t bring up Dad, did she?”

“Of course she did.” 

“What a bitch.” 

“ Nene! ” 

She dodges a light slap from her mom, laughing. It feels so refreshing to gossip with her like this, it’s like stepping back into her childhood. She’s not been an adult for long, but she already misses her carefree high school year. Of course, Nene’s high school years were far from typical, but things were slightly more manageable back then. Being an adult has its perks, but it gets overwhelming fast. She doesn’t really want to be a kid again, but she enjoys moments like this where she can pretend. 

“Sorry,” she puts her hand up defensively. “She’s a lovely woman.” 

“Keep that attitude for next weekend, she wants us to come visit,” her mom exhales. “I can’t force you to go, since you’re an adult, but I’d appreciate it if you did. She’s nicer when you’re around.” 

“I light up every room,” she mutters. “Fine, I’ll go. I’ll have to check my schedule though, so no promises.” 

“I’m going to take that as a yes,” she grins. “Now, what’s bothering you? Is it that boy?” 

Nene shifts uncomfortably. “He’s part of it.” 

Her phone call with Kou had gone…decently. They didn’t argue, which is a step in the right direction. She apologized for avoiding him and he admitted that he’d been avoiding her too. She also finally apologized for insulting his brother, which is what he’d been wanting her to do all along. They agreed to meet up Sunday and talk things over in person, deciding where they want to go from there. The whole conversation felt very neutral, and she doesn’t like not knowing how things are gonna turn out. She doesn’t know whether to prepare herself for a good day or a bad day. As a result, her nerves have been all over the place this morning. 

“Did something happen between you two?” 

“We had a fight,” Nene explains. “I met his brother and we didn’t get along, it turned into a whole thing. We’ve avoided each other all week but I called him last night, and he said he wants to talk things over in person.” 

Her mom’s eyes widened. “And what do you make of that?”

“I was hoping you’d be able to decipher it for me,” she groans. “Men are too complicated.” 

“Tell me about it. Your dad used to get all huffy after our arguments, he always knew he was wrong but he never wanted to apologize.” 

“This time I was the one in the wrong.” 

“I gathered that.” 

“ Mom! ” 

“You said you had a fight with his brother,” she retorts. “I’m just interpreting the information I’ve been given. Unless there’s anything you’ve left out…?”

“There’s not,” except for, you know, the whole Spider-Woman situation, and Amane. And Aoi. But they aren’t relevant here, because she refuses to let other people influence her relationship with Kou. She knows who her boyfriend is. 

“Well then, it sounds to me like you started it. You are your father’s daughter, after all.” 

Despite herself, Nene smiles. “I am. I just wish I didn’t inherit…whatever this is.” 

“I wouldn’ consider it a bad thing, he was an expert in some areas.” 

“That’s disgusting,” she gags. 

“I didn’t mean that ,” her mom makes a face. “He was a sweet guy, and he knew how to pull off a grand gesture. He could be sentimental when he wanted to.” 

For some reason, hearing about her parents’ relationship made Nene think of Aoi. She has to pull off a sentimental gesture herself by tomorrow, and she doesn’t have a lot of time. Her mom absolutely adores Aoi, so maybe she’ll have some ideas. 

“Did you guys ever struggle to make things work? I mean, between work and raising me. That’s a lot to keep up with.”

“I believe most couples struggle with that,” she says. “We were no exception. Especially when you were first born, it was hard to make time just for us. We never regretted you though.” 

Nene knows that, but she still finds the disclaimer sweet. It’s nice to know that she was wanted, and that she’s loved even when she’s causing problems. 

“How did you deal with it?” 

“Well,” her mother straightens up. “We tried the typical method of having a designated date night, but that fell apart. Life happens, and plans aren’t always reliable.” 

“So what did you do?” 

“Slow down,” she laughs. “Why do you want to know about this so badly? Are you and Kou struggling to make time for each other?”

…Right, this conversation is supposed to be about Kou. 

“You could say that.” 

“Already at that age,” she teases. “I’ll tell you what we did then. We gave up on the schedules and instead agreed to take advantage of every free moment, even if it wasn’t that long. We started eating breakfast together in the mornings, and I would visit him on his lunch break. We talked before we went to bed every night, and we spent weekends with each other instead of friends. It wasn’t much effort, but it worked perfectly for us. Within the first couple weeks, I felt like I was starting to get to know him again.” 

She stares at her mom in awe, as though she’s listening to Socrates explain his new philosophy. In hindsight, it sounds so obvious she can’t believe she didn’t think of it before. 

How much time does she waste in a day that she could be dedicating to Aoi? How many extra minutes does she add to her patrols that could be spent getting home early? She could talk to Aoi more in the mornings, or see her in between classes. This whole time she’s been so stressed over designating large chunks of time to Aoi, that she’s forgotten to utilize the time they do have. 

She can still fix this. This friendship won’t turn out anything like Akane, not if she can help it. She’ll stop blowing Aoi off with the promise of a “later” that will never come. She’ll do mundane things with her, like laundry and grocery shopping. She’ll strengthen their friendship bit by bit, like putting together pieces of a puzzle. 

Isn’t that the best part of friendship? Becoming so close that you don’t have to worry over plans in order to stay in each other’s lives. Connecting through small interactions that mean the world to both of you. Nene needs that in her life, now more than ever. 

“You’re a lifesaver,” she praises. “Seriously, what would I do without you?” 

“You’d manage,” her mom smiles, proud. “You’re tougher than you realize.” 

That may be true, but Nene doesn’t want to live without her mom. She knows she’s tough, but sometimes she wishes she didn’t have to be. She wishes she could be soft and helpless, like Aoi or Amane. Just once, she’d like to be the one getting saved. 

In a way, her mom is saving her. She saves her every time she gives her advice that Nene will use for the rest of her life. Her mother saves her in small ways, every day. She’s more of a superhero than Nene will ever be. 

“There’s another thing,” Nene says. “I recently told Aoi that I would get her the best birthday gift she could ever ask for, but her birthday is tomorrow and I still have no idea what to get her.” 

“Oh dear,” her mom frowns. “That's quite the dilemma.”

“C’mon,” she grabs her arm. “I need some of your expert advice right now. What do I get her?”

“You know Aoi better than I do,” she shrugs. “I’m afraid you’ll have to figure this one out on your own.” 

She flops back on the couch, whining. “You’re awful.” 

“I try,” she brushes Nene’s bangs back. “Get her something with meaning, something she’s never had before.” 

That was her plan, but what has Aoi never had? As far as material objects go, Aoi has everything. The only thing she’s never had is friends, and parents who support her emotionally. She’s had a hard life mentally, but there’s nothing Nene can buy her that she doesn’t already have. And just spending the day with her wouldn’t be much of a gift. 

She frowns, scratching her head. What can she give Aoi to encapsulate their friendship? Something she’s never had, something with meaning. What do people usually get their friends? Nene’s bought a lot of gifts throughout the years, she should be an expert by now. 

Something you get your friends…

Something Aoi’s never had before…

Something with meaning…

She thinks back to that picture of Akane, and the answer hits her like a train. She feels like she just solved the world’s greatest riddle (meaning she could easily hold her own in a Batman comic). 

She bolts up, gasping. “I’ve got it!” 

Her mom gives her a knowing look. “Have you?” 

“Yes,” she stands. “I don’t have much time, I should go look for it. Thank you for breakfast, and for the advice.” 

“Anytime.” 

Do they even sell what she’s looking for anymore? Surely they do. It shouldn’t be hard to find either. And it’s something Aoi’s probably never had before, so it should work perfectly. Her only obstacle is time. 

She hates to rush out like this, but she needs to hurry if she wants to get Aoi’s gift bought and wrapped in time. Besides, her mom isn’t Aoi, she won’t take it as a personal offense. She was raised by a mother who guilt-tripped her a lot, and so she has sworn to never treat Nene that way. Their relationship has no pressure, they both understand and respect that they have lives outside being mother and daughter. She’s the one person Nene can breathe easy around. 

Her mother walks her back to the kitchen so she can see her out, helping Nene collect her things. They agree to see each other again next Friday, and Nene makes a half-hearted commitment to visit her grandma next weekend. She’ll probably end up going whether she wants to or not, unless the world is on fire. Hopefully she’ll be able to work something out with the Human Torch.

“I hope everything works out for you,” her mom says, as they part ways. “And Nene?”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.” 

She smiles. “I love you too, Mom.” 

And so Nene began her pre-noon journey, hitting up every tacky jewelry store in her area. 

~

December 12th, 11:49 PM 

Nightly patrols help Nene clear her head after a long day. It’s not the healthiest coping mechanism, nor the safest, but it works for her. Worst-case scenario, she gets to let out all her pent up aggression by knocking out a few criminals. It’s always a pleasure to make grown men bleed and piss themselves. 

That’s not why she does it though, not in a city full of villains so tactful they would never be obvious enough to strike at night. If it were an obligation, she would find nights just as tiring as every other part of her day. She craves the serene escape these rooftops provide her, giving her a perfect view of the city she works so hard to protect. Up here, at night, Nene can watch over her fellow citizens while giving herself time to think. 

She thinks about all the things that cause her stress, and the few things that bring her joy. She thinks about Aoi’s timid smile and Kou’s warm arms. She thinks about why she does all this, all the people she wants to protect. Rooftops help her organize her thoughts better than any other place in the world. She feels centered here, completely in touch with herself. 

Crouched on the edge of the roof, she can’t help but notice the empty space beside her, where a friend used to be. That is, if Black Cat can really be called a “friend.” Their relationship always blurred the lines of friendship, rivalry, and something twisted. She used to be able to call Black Cat- or, as she knows her, Sakura- a friend without giving too much thought to the meaning behind the word. Things haven’t been the same between them since she started dating Kou. It seems no matter who Nene chooses, she always ends up hurting someone. 

There’s no choice though, not anymore. The choice has already been made, Nene would rather be with Kou than anyone else in this world- and she believes that. She’s going to tell him as much when she sees him Sunday. She’ll tell him that she loves him and that she wants to make this work, because that’s what Kou deserves to hear. That’s what Nene wants. 

Why is she still thinking about this? She’s already decided what she’s going to do. She knows what she wants, there’s no need to complicate things. 

She turns her head up to the sky, admiring the endless stars. They blink down on her, as though watching her every move. Her dad used to tell her the stars were guardians, protecting humans as they go about their lives. From this perspective, they almost look like one enormous spider web. If she had a rocket, she could fly up there and connect them like dots. 

Realistically, that would take eternity, and her webs probably won’t stick to balls of gas. Nene doesn’t like reality very much. She’d like to live in a Supergirl comic, where heroes and villains are merely works of fiction. Where nobody hates her and her dad still makes her pancakes every morning. 

She has to push ahead though, even if life isn’t easy. Life will never be easy, and the sooner she makes peace with that, the sooner she’ll be able to let go of everything that’s been holding her back. There’s no way to go back, so moving forward is the only option. 

What’s holding her back, in this exact moment? What is she not doing? 

Well, she’s spending more time in the suit than she ever planned to. There are no superhero therapists, but she has a sneaking suspicion that isn’t healthy for her mental state. It’s become an addiction, she’s constantly finding excuses to be Spider-Woman. Whenever she gets bored, her mind starts to drift to the rooftops she’s grown to know so well. 

She doesn’t need a professional to tell her she’s pushing herself too hard. She’s trying to be everything for everyone all at once, and it’s both mentally and physically exhausting. She’s a superhero, not a god; she’s not invincible. Even the heroes who do claim to be “Invincible” have their limits. 

She tries to be the perfect daughter, the star employee, the barely-beloved hero, the loyal best friend, and the girl-next-door-friend all in one. The enticing rival, the sadistic punisher, the compassionate savior, the underdog, the star, the hard-working student, the flirty study-buddy. Name a category, and Nene has probably tried to force herself into it at some point. She’s tried to become so much that she’s lost sight of who she is. Maybe she’s all of the things she tries to be, just not so superficially. She’s something deeper and less tangible. Not a hero, but a human. 

Is it possible to be both? 

That’s what she tries to be, but what defines a hero? Kou is a hero, always willing to lend a helping hand to his classmates. Aoi is a hero, maintaining a part of her true self throughout all the silent pain she’s experienced. Tsuchigomori is a hero, working hard every day to make sure the News keeps coming, whether it’s good or bad. Amane is a hero, overcoming his rough past to make something of himself. Her mom is a hero, providing a warm home for her to return to. Even those muggers she thrashed were heroes in their own way, making a living under their own terms the same way Sakura does. 

What makes Nene more of a hero than anyone else? Just because she wears a fancy costume and works extra hard doesn’t mean she’s any better or worse than the people around her. There is the grandiose, stereotypical vision of a superhero, but that’s only one way to be heroic. She’s lost sight of the everyday, human aspects of heroism. She’s let Nene take a backseat to Spider-Woman. 

Perhaps that’s what’s really been bothering her; she’s not just been neglecting her friends, she’s been neglecting herself. She doesn’t let herself take breaks, let alone make decisions based on her own wants. That’s why she’s been so confused about Kou, she’s only focusing on his side of things. She’s been altering her own feelings to manifest the outcome that will cause the least amount of conflict- doing what she’s supposed to do, as opposed to what she wants. 

But what does she want? Does she want to break up with Kou? All things considered, he’s still her first love. She wants to keep that, if only for a moment longer. If he wasn’t important to her, she wouldn’t consider his feelings so heavily. Nene likes to flirt, but at the end of the day, she always goes back to one person. Kou doesn’t mind her flirting because he trusts her. Objectively, she’s done nothing wrong and she has nothing to worry about. They’ll talk everything out soon enough. 

…Yeah, something’s still missing. She still feels like there’s a perspective she’s not considering. Something (or someone) holding her back. Someone she has to put first, someone she longs for even when they’re right beside each other. 

She thinks back to the small box tucked away in her nightstand. The silver chain currently hanging from her neck, carefully concealed by her suit. As silly as it sounds, she wanted to carry a piece of Aoi with her tonight. 

Oh 

Aoi. All this time it’s been Aoi that’s holding her back. Her best friend, Aoi. The same Aoi that has been occupying Nene’s mind since the day they met. Aside from being Spider-Woman, Nene would say her biggest concern is managing her turbulent friendship with Aoi. Somedays, she feels like Aoi hates her; and others, Aoi looks at her like she’s the greatest gift to ever grace the surface of the earth. It’s fucking exhausting, but Nene wants to protect her. Not just physically, but emotionally as well. She wants Aoi to look at her and feel safe, to know she never has to worry about anything ever again in her life because Nene will take care of it. She can’t remember the last time she felt so selfishly and strongly about someone all at once. It’s overwhelming, it’s allconsuming, and it drives her insane. 

But it’s her’s. 

Nene’s obligation to Aoi was born solely out of her own desire to be close to the woman. A responsibility appointed not by the cruel powers of the universe, but by Nene’s own free will. She and Aoi are both attached to each other, albeit in different ways. Aoi may not be able to stand without Nene, but Nene can’t go on without Aoi. She’d go insane. They shine only under each other’s light, and if they were ever to be parted their worlds would go dark. 

If she were the oblivious girl she’d been four years ago, Nene might have been able to delude herself into thinking Aoi was only holding her back because their friendship is time-consuming. That she doesn’t have time for boys, and it’s all Aoi’s fault. But she knows that’s not the case, there’s much more to it than that. 

Why, though ? Why did it have to be Aoi of all people? She always knew there was something between them, but she’d brushed it off as an average homoerotic friendship. They’re both into girls (even if Aoi doesn’t know it yet), they’re both attractive, and they spend a lot of time together. It’s only natural there’d be tension, it would be stranger if there wasn’t. Nene never expected it to become anything serious though. 

How long has she had feelings for Aoi? And how is she just now noticing? Has she really been that preoccupied with Kou? Thinking about it gives her a headache. 

The answers don’t matter, as the questions all point towards dead ends. Aoi is the most unavailable person Nene could have fallen for. She hasn’t come to terms with her sexuality yet, and she’s clearly not ready for a relationship. Nene wants something serious, and Aoi instinctively pushes people away. Nene’s lucky she got close enough to be Aoi’s friend, anything more is entirely out of the question. If anyone could do it, Nene could. But still… 

She doesn’t want to hurt Aoi. She can’t hurt Aoi. Aoi is too precious to her, and Nene is terrible at relationships. There’s a reason Kou is her first steady boyfriend, and she can’t even manage that. She’s flighty, and a bit of a player, and Aoi deserves better than that. Nene aims to protect Aoi from assholes that won’t treat her right, and that includes herself. 

They just wouldn’t be good for each other. They’d probably kill each other within a week. Or worse, breakup. Aoi would crave attention Nene couldn’t give her, and Nene would mourn the freedom Aoi would never let her have. Aoi isn’t anywhere near as trusting as Kou, and that’s why he’s the one Nene should stick with. No sense in ruining a poor girl’s life just because Nene can’t control her own, stupid heart. 

And ruin her, Nene would. It’s a fact of the universe that nothing Nene wants ever works out for her. She always finds a way to mess it up. She’ll probably mess Kou up too, but that’s okay, because they’ll stay friends. Kou is a lot more understanding than Aoi, and he’s too similar to Nene to ignore her side of things. She doesn’t think she has the capacity to hurt Kou as much as her and Aoi could hurt each other. 

So she’ll stick with Kou. It’s not an unhappy decision, not by a long shot. She loves Kou, even if he’s not Aoi. And relationships are about more than just feelings, there are multiple factors to consider. Kou is the smart decision, he’s what she’s comfortable with. And if they break up, it will be on good terms. 

Honestly, she feels like she should be sadder about this than she is. Even if Kou makes her happy, it would only be natural to mourn what she could have had with Aoi. After all the stress she’s put herself under, Nene can only feel relieved to have finally made a decision she can stand by. It’s the same decision she already made, but she’s glad she was at least honest with herself before making it final. If she’d gone to meet Kou without thinking everything through first, they probably wouldn’t have lasted another week. The Aoi Problem would have driven Nene past the brink of insanity. 

She throws her head back, breathing easily. A weight has been lifted from her shoulders, and she feels freer than she has in months. An uneasy knot of wires has been untangled in her gut, and her head feels impossibly clear. It feels nice to finally know what’s been nagging at her for so long, even if the resolution is bittersweet. She knows what she’s going to do and, for once, she has full confidence in her decision. 

She pulls out her phone, checking the time. 

12:03 AM

It’s December 13th, Aoi’s birthday. Nene smiles to herself under the mask, pocketing her phone and standing up. She may not be able to give Aoi a relationship, but she can still be the best damn friend Aoi has ever had. Well, the only friend Aoi’s ever had, but that’s besides the point. 

She swings over to their dormitory, full of a newfound energy that erupted inside of her the instant she came to her conclusion. 

From now on, she knows who she’s going to be. Kou’s girlfriend, and Aoi’s best friend. She’ll try to give them more of herself, to be down to earth with them in a way she couldn’t before. She had become too consumed with heroism that she lost sight of the importance of mundane kindness. That kept her at a distance from the people she loves, but now she’s identified the problem, so all she has to do is solve it. Right? 

She’ll be so present and healthy in their lives, they’ll think she’s an entirely different person. Nene Yashiro is finally going to get her shit together. 

She stops on the roof of their dorm to get changed, locating the bag she’d stashed here earlier. She hid it carefully so that it wouldn’t be stolen, a paranoid precaution, because there’s no entrance to the roof. Nobody could get up here unless they had a ladder, or some handy spiderwebs. Still, she’d rather not risk it. 

Her suit is exchanged for a pink sweatshirt and jeans, hair tied back to disguise the tangled mess it's become. She wears it in a low bun when she wears the suit, too stubborn to cut it. It’s too recognizable to wear loose, so her options are limited. 

The walk up to her dorm is normally exhausting after a night patrol, but her recent boost of energy keeps her going. In addition to that, she’s really excited to see Aoi. This will be a smart way to try out her mom’s advice of utilizing her time right. Patrol was uneventful anyway, so she’s not risking anything by leaving early. 

“Happy birthday,” Nene cheers as she pushes open the door to her dorm. “I’m home early.” 

Aoi is sitting on her bed in a white t-shirt and seafoam blue shorts, laptop resting on her stomach. The sight makes Nene’s heart soften, she looks so domestic. Her eyes widen at Nene’s presence, and she immediately moves the laptop aside to sit up. 

“Nene-chan?” She says. “I thought you were studying with Amane tonight.” 

“I wanted to be back in time to tell you happy birthday before you went to bed.” 

She probably would have seen her either way, Aoi has a habit of staying up way too late and oversleeping in the mornings. Nene stays out late though, so she usually catches Aoi right as she’s going to bed. Tonight, Nene wanted to spend time with Aoi. 

“You didn’t have to do that,” a pretty shade of pink dusts Aoi’s cheeks. 

“I wanted to,” Nene locks the door behind her. “We’re starting your birthday off early.” 

She discards her bag in its usual spot beneath her desk, glancing towards her nightstand. 

“There’s not much to do.” 

“Do you want your gift now?” 

“I’d forgotten about that,” Aoi lies. “What did you get me?” 

Nene skips excitedly over to her nightstand, producing a small box concealed by star-covered wrapping paper. She tosses it in Aoi’s direction, watching as it lands directly in her lap. The good aim is a product of her spider abilities, something she usually tries to hide. She’s being a bit careless tonight. 

“Open it and find out,” she plops down on Aoi’s bed, crossing her legs. 

Close up, she can’t help but notice how pretty Aoi is. Her hair is a little damp, meaning she showered recently. She smells like lavender tea, and her skin is flushed from the hot water. Nene wants to kean into her, to rest her head in the crook of Aoi’s neck and breathe her in. 

Woah, where did that come from? 

She shrugs it off as a side-effect of realizing her feelings for Aoi. Of course things are gonna be weird for a while, but Nene refuses to succumb to that. She’s not gonna let a silly crush ruin her friendship with Aoi. 

Anyone would be a fool not to be a little in love with Aoi, Nene is merely infected with the disease that comes from being exposed to a pretty girl for too long. She’s had a million crushes throughout her lifetime, this will probably go away after a week or too. Reading into it will only complicate things, and Nene’s trying to make her life easier for everyone. 

Her eyes zero in on Aoi’s delicate fingers as they fumble with the box, how lovely her blue nail polish looks. Her hands are small and bony, knuckles winking at her as her fingers bend. They’re long, slender, and cold to the touch. Nene still remembers the first time those hands touched her, like a cube of ice melting down her arm. 

“Are you okay?” 

Nene flinches. “What?”

“Your face is all red.” 

Shit, she’d been staring at Aoi too long. She’s supposed to be getting it together. 

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she brushes off the question. “I was just out in the cold for too long. Go on, open your present.” 

Aoi gives her a curious look, but doesn’t protest. She tears open the wrapping paper without much care, doing a poor job at hiding her eagerness. Nene would laugh if she hadn’t just been called out. 

She stares at the contents of the open box, confused. “What is this?” 

Inside the box rests a small silver heart on a chain. The heart is broken in half, missing the left side. 

“It’s a friendship necklace,” Nene smiles. “You’ve never seen one?” 

“Of course I have,” Aoi snaps, defensively. “Who’s the other friend?” 

Nene pulls her half of the necklace out from under the collar of the shirt. “I wanted to get you something meaningful. You said you didn’t have many friends growing up and, well, I used to wear these with Akane…it may have been a rude assumption, I’m sorry. You don’t have to wear it if you don-”

She’s cut off by Aoi suddenly lunging at her, wrapping her in her arms. Nene’s heart immediately skyrockets, though her brain lags. It’s a miracle she didn’t die on the spot from shock. They’ve hugged before, but Aoi is rarely the one to initiate. 

“I take it you like the necklace?” 

“Thank you,” Aoi’s voice sounds a little shaky. “This means a lot to me.” 

“I’m glad,” she finally gains enough sense to return the hug, wrapping her arms around Aoi’s waist. Aoi relaxes into the touch, practically sitting on Nene’s lap. Her face grows warm again. 

It seems that Aoi just wants to hug her for a moment, so Nene allows it. She doesn’t say anything about it, just lets Aoi hold her as long as she needs to. She’s crying, but Nene doesn’t mention that either. She doesn’t know why Aoi gets emotional over such small, random things, but barely blinks at more severe tragedies. She doesn’t need to know, because she knows Aoi and that’s enough. 

She wonders how Aoi can hug her for so long. She’s been out all night and she probably smells terrible. Aoi’s always been overly particular about that sort of thing. She also doesn’t know when she started caring so much about what Aoi thinks of her. 

Awkwardness aside, Nene doesn’t mind staying like this. Aoi is soft and light in her arms, warming her up after a cold night. Her figure is distinctly feminine, her skin is so smooth, her hair tickles the side of Nene’s face. It all leaves Nene’s mind in a fuzzy state of Aoi Aoi ohmygod she’s hugging Aoi- 

It’s pathetic how much she enjoys Aoi’s company. All she wants is to be a good friend, but she can’t stop her foolish heart from wondering if she could get away with kissing Aoi’s cheek. Soon enough, Nene starts to feel like she could stay here forever. She’d be perfectly content to live out the rest of her days with Aoi in her arms, slowly rotting away together. 

Aoi chooses that exact moment to pull away, eyes watery and face redder than before. She leaves one hand on Nene’s shoulder, as though it hurts to let go. 

“Sorry.” 

“Don’t be,” Nene says, quickly. “Stay here as long as you need.” 

They lock eyes, a thousand words passing between them. Nene can make out none of them, but she knows they’ll both read into this interaction for the next week. Nothing will come of it, but they’ll cling to it like it changes things. 

After a stretch of time, Aoi pulls her hand away, scooting back. Nene feels cold and disappointed, but she hides it behind a reassuring smile. If Aoi thinks, even for a second, that Nene is mad at her, it could ruin the whole night. 

She’d like to reach across and brush Aoi’s hair out of her face, to wipe away the stray tears that adorn her cheeks. Giving into this stupid crush will do her no good though, so she keeps her hands to herself. On Sunday, she’ll tell Kou she loves him. 

They’re quiet for an uncomfortable amount of time, unsure of what to do with the strange sense of longing that lingers between them. They need to break it, to get things back to normal. 

“Wanna watch a movie?” Nene suggests. 

Aoi’s face breaks out in a smile. “Sure.” 

“I know you picked last time,” she starts. “But since it’s your birthday I’ll let you pick twice in a row. Only because it’s your birthday.” 

“I’m honored,” Aoi giggles. “We’re watching Scream then.” 

“The first one or…?”

“The first one.” 

They play the movie on Aoi’s laptop, snuggled up beneath the covers of her bed. Nene jolts at every jumpscare, despite having survived much worse attacks in real life. Aoi’s eyes follow the female lead and her best friend a little too closely, and Nene grins to herself every time. They end up falling asleep like that, Aoi’s shoulder digging into Nene’s cheek. 

They won’t mention it tomorrow. Nene will drag Aoi out of bed early so they can walk around the city and do anything Aoi wants. She’ll buy her raspberry crepes, and take her thrifting, and let her pick the movie for the third time in a row. The day after that, she’ll make things right with her boyfriend. 

That’s how it should be, that’s the outcome that will be best for everyone. Nene will be happy, and no one will have to get hurt. It might sting a while to have to avoid her feelings for Aoi, but those will go away with time (she hopes). 

For now, Nene lets herself pretend things are different. In another life, if they were two different people, she might have chosen Aoi. Maybe that choice would come as easy as breathing, or maybe it wouldn’t, but none of that would happen as long as she had Aoi. They’d buy an apartment together after college, and adopt two cats and a hamster. Aoi would have a lot of plants, and Nene would insist on all pink furniture. They’d fall asleep in each other’s arms every night, and Nene would walk away from her greatest responsibility to give Aoi everything she deserves. 

It doesn’t sound half bad.