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Yogi rummaged through the basket, desperate to satiate his hunger with a “snack-type goodies”, as he called them. He found a bag of ruffled potato chips, ripped it open with vigor and munched away gleefully. “Hey, Boob! Ya find anything good?” Boo Boo was looking rather pensive as he peered into the belly of an open cooler. “I guess I found some funny looking soda-pop.” One of his tiny little paws held up a tall, wide can. The silver shimmered in the light, the droplets trickling down its’ base from the melted ice beckoned Yogi to partake. “I’d hop on a cop for some sodie-pop!” Before Boo Boo could remark on how that didn’t make a whole lot of sense, the taller bear snatched the can out of the small bear’s hand.
The tsssshk sound the tab made was all too satisfying. Yogi greedily slurped down the can’s contents. As soon as he could get a real taste, though, he paused. “This don’t taste like no sodie-pop I’ve had before.” It was salty, and sour. A little watery too, not that super-sweet syrupy goodness the bear was anticipating. “Is it good, Yogi?” Boo Boo looked up at him with expectant eyes. Yogi took another hearty swig. He licked his lips. The second sip was a big improvement. “It may be funny tastin’, but I never met a sodie-pop I didn’t like!” Boo Boo tilted the cooler to bare its’ contents, about ten or so silver cans floating in a slurry of icewater. “There’s lots more, too!” The bears grinned at each other.
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Ranger Smith’s golf cart stalled to a stop at the picnic area of Jellystone. He grumbled to himself “The third time this week.” When he had gotten a call about two bears raiding a cooler it was all he had in him to not quit then and there. But houses don’t come cheap these days. “That irresponsible, wreckless Yogi. What would he do if he had to pay his mortgage?” The gravel crunched under the heel of his work boots. He wanted to get this over with.
He was horrified to find Boo Boo perched on the highest branch on easily one of the tallest trees in Jellystone. He was slightly bobbing back and forth, not really able to keep steady. “Y-you can do it, Boo Boo buddy!” His partner in crime was cheering him on from down below. As Ranger Smith walked up to Yogi, he realized just how much of a wreck he looked. His hat was on backwards, his tie crumpled and undone. “You just gotta belieeeeve in yourself!” Even just standing beside him, the ranger could smell the unmistakable stench of beer coming from the bear’s lips. Oh god. “I believe, Yogi! I believe I can fly!” The small bear shouted. This sent the taller bear on a tear as he started sing-yelling about touching the sky and what he’d do for some apple pie. Waving around one his arms, his paw clutched a can. Ranger Smith grabbed onto his wrist.
Yogi just smiled. “Hullo, Officer Dibble. Y’wanna see Benny do a trick?” He slurred. The ranger got a good look at the can. He turned up his nose. “Miller Lite, Yogi? I’m disappointed in you.”