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On that quiet night, the only sound the brush interrupted was the rumbling stream of water behind his back, falling from the mountains pure and free unlike his thoughts plastered in ink. Luckily the moon was full and bright, giving enough light to shed on Xiao’s papers and heart.
This, to him, was harder than fighting any demons. Unspoken longing and memories that he had tried to bury were painful enough, but how do you turn them into beautiful words and make them flow like that written leaf down the river?
And yet, had they not festered inside for far too long, not unlike karmic debt? Should they not be released, like that anonymous poem? He could not pretend forever that a yaksha was devoid of feelings, but that’s just what he used to tell himself to lull the sorrow. They were so full of life, before their violent ends… Just like that landscape, full of fleeting beauty and dreams.
The tall cliff as high as his longing, rocks like Menogias…
The flowing river as deep as his feelings, water like Bonanus…
The lamps and candles from the temple as warm as his thoughts, fire like Indarias…
The broken guardian statue lying underwater as kind and steadfast as Bosacius…
A thousand years of vicissitudes in him, but erosion and corruption hasn’t yet taken these memories away from him. They were the proof his siblings were alive and it is an affection that transcended time. Only in dreams he could ever meet them again and feel whole, but he had accepted their fate.
Perhaps that crude reflection was poetic enough to put it on paper. Xiao drew the characters before they left like the wind. He made a mistake, he crumpled the sheet. He tried again and again. He accidentally pressed the wet ink with the back of his hand, making a mess. He didn’t like a line and thought of a better one. After some tries, he was satisfied. Was it good? Would their souls like it? He didn’t know. But he felt light like a feather, and that was the point.
He put the paper on the ground for the ink to dry, using his censer as a paperweight. Then leaned back until he was lying on the grass and he could see the stars above. The fight in his heart took a lot of energy from him, even if he had just sat on the green heights above Pervases’ temple.
After one or two sticks of incense had burned, a soft yet comforting breeze sent the crumpled papers downhill. Not moving his body, not moving even his arm over his chest, he just awaited holding his breath. He knew that breeze too well. One that caused a separate longing sometimes in his heart too.
“Oops,” the melodic voice said. “I didn’t mean to do that.”
“It’s fine,” Xiao said. “Those were not important.” As long as the paper under the censer hadn’t escaped.
“May I sit here and accompany you tonight, my dear warrior?”
“…Yes,” Xiao sighed. There were three individuals he could never say no to. And one was the bard who let himself fall on the grass, white-clad legs stretching like a cat’s. “I thought you would be with Director Hu during your visit.”
“Are you jealous?” Venti teased, cupping his face with one hand, elbow on his thigh.
Perhaps a little. But Xiao shook his head. He was quite happier to have met the Traveler and Barbatos again, even if not for long. That emotion was more important than envy.
“I was gonna, but today’s lyrical turnout was so good that she’s been busy writing a draft of the best poems of our participants. It seems she got obsessed with the idea of making an anthology! She left me in charge of tomorrow’s event since she needs to talk to a publisher.” Venti shrugged. “Ah, reckless youth… Now I’m left to be the responsible one of the two.”
“You say that in annoyance, but I can tell you’re thrilled.”
Venti jiggled. “It’s a great idea. But now she left her poor guest all alone. My options were you or ‘Mr. Zhongli’ or even my friend Kazuha assuming he’s still in Liyue Harbor. But… I wanted to see you in particular tonight.”
“I… I see…” Xiao blushed. “Don’t you rather talk to with Rex Lapis?”
“I can hang out with that old rock tomorrow. Today is your night, Xiao. And it’s not like you don’t have interesting things to say? Don’t downplay your company.” Venti’s soft, tender voice felt louder than the waterfall.
Xiao nodded, not really agreeing but still moved by the answer.
“Speaking of the poetry event, thank you for coming to check it out in the end,” Venti smiled as bright as the moon and as soft as the clouds. “I hope you’ve enjoyed and learned a bit about verse weaving while watching.”
Of course he knew.
“I was… well, it wasn’t the only reason I was around.”
“Oh? Did you miss me and Traveler all that much?” Venti teased.
“Ahem!” Xiao looked away. “It was the case that young exorcist was investigating. Since it happened in my patrol route.”
“So that’s why Paimon was calling you like you had just disappeared. You joined them in their inspiration walk and then did disappear! Ehehe, I’m glad you had a fun little adventure then.”
“In the end we couldn’t find the entity he encountered,” Xiao looked back at Venti. “We got distracted by something else. However…”
“However?”
“That blue-haired woman in the festival. She’s not human. I can sense she’s a foreign elemental being, quite similar to the hydro fairy who lives in the waterfalls behind Wuwang Hill.”
“You guys have an oceanid too?”
“Yes. I approached her a few centuries ago. She mistook me for an assassin from her homeland and summoned familiars to chase me. But she suffers from no corruption and means no harm to the people of Liyue, so Rex Lapis allowed her to stay.”
“You have nothing to worry about Callirhoe either, I can vouch for her. She took refuge in the tranquil waters of our Springvale for a little while, so for me she counts as a child of Mondstadt through and through.”
Xiao sat up and glanced at Venti in the eyes with a quizzical look.
“What?” Venti asked.
“Whenever you’re around, things start happening that are too much of a coincidence,” Xiao smiled. “The creature Chongyun saw, the oceanid in the event, the author of the poem in the leaf. It’s all one and the same.”
“Right. You’ve figured it out. Will you let them know?”
“No need. It’s not important anymore and like you said, she’s harmless. Besides, it’s not my place to reveal secrets that are not mine.”
“They should find out soon anyway,” Venti tapped his chin. “That seed of story is about to blossom into a beautiful flower.”
“I see…” Xiao looked down. “Do you think she got some closure with that poem…?”
“You’re so kind, Xiao. I can’t tell what the future holds for her, but I can put your mind at ease. The recipient of that poem still lives. It’s not too late for her yet to express her feelings. So perhaps someone can give her a push?”
“Oh.” Xiao closed his eyes. “That’s good.” He felt a bit envious, but he was happy for her.
“Yes. I hope she takes the chance.”
“Venti.” Xiao raised an eyebrow. “You’re the one who brought her here, weren’t you? You co-organized the poetry exchange, you somehow machinated so an oceanid who lived in your nation ended up here, and you also invited the Traveler to participate.”
“Machinated sounds a bit ugly. I like to think of myself as a catalyst of stories and a bringer of hope.”
Xiao remembered the night that haunted his good dreams. The beautiful sound of the flute under the moonlight, just there for him at the right moment. A bringer of hope indeed.
“My apologies. I meant to say machinations in a positive way. You’re creating opportunities for others to heal and move on, aren’t you?”
“No offense taken,” Venti winked. “Thanks for thinking so highly of me.”
Xiao kept quiet for a few minutes, his knees held between his arms. He debated about it, and the best way to say it. But words are hard to let out.
“Venti,” he finally said. “I wrote… Um, forget it.”
He panicked and his mouth betrayed him. Venti just kept quiet, not pushing him to continue. Just curiosity and compassion in his eyes. He would never ask Xiao to say things he didn’t want to say.
Except he did want to say them, so he tried again.
“No, don’t forget it. That elemental’s poem gave me a lot to think about. So when Traveler saw through me and suggested me to write my own, I thought I should try.” He reached for the sheet of paper. “I want you to read it. It might not be good though.”
Venti’s hand caressed Xiao’s cheek.
“I would be honored. And don’t worry! Like Hu Tao says, we all start small. Plenty of the kids you heard when you watched over the venue weren’t poets either. What’s important is that your heart is finally singing your true feelings.”
That still didn’t make Xiao feel secure. After all, Venti was a god of poetry and song. He had told him he even gives lessons to his people sometimes in exchange of Mora for booze. Not like he understood why not one but two archons would gladly offer their wisdom to mortals for coin, it was an alien concept for most adepti after all.
He waited in silence as Venti took the paper and read in silence. It felt like an eternity. The god’s face turned solemn, even sad.
“Xiao…
A pause.
“Oh yes, this is actually pretty good. It’s beautiful.”
“Do you think they… can really hear it?”
Venti nodded and met Xiao’s eyes. “They already know, I’m sure of it. How are you feeling?”
“My heart feels much calmer.”
“I understand that feeling too well.”
Xiao knew the load in those words. Venti had confided to him about his old mortal friends, and that one in particular who changed his world. Just there, under the moonlight, with that bittersweet expression, it was easy to imagine Venti writing dozens and hundreds of poems about the young man. Singing about him. Keeping the memory alive and yet obfuscating it so no one could alter that piece of history from this world.
Not knowing what else to say, Xiao just nodded.
Then to his surprise, he found himself pulled into an embrace. Venti’s arms surrounded him in a firm invitation. Overwhelmed with the affection and warmth, Xiao’s heart twisted in his chest. Careful, his hands touched Venti’s back with softness, as though his lovely human shape could break and taint to his touch. He could smell the scent of flowers and wine in his hair.
He couldn’t tell for how long they stayed in the hug. It didn’t feel long enough.
“Could I… hear a poem you’ve never shared with anyone before?” Xiao dared to ask. “I think you need to unwind and express those emotions as well.”
Venti blinked and then laughed.
“That’s a fair request. You shared your first poem, so I’ll give you one of my earliest work from over two thousand years ago. Let me try to remember how that one went exactly, it’s been literal ages.”
“It’s fine.”
“I think I got it, more or less. It went like this:
“Steh nicht weinend an seinem Grab.
Er liegt nicht dort in tiefem Schlaf.
Er ist der Wind über brausender See.
Er ist der Schimmer auf frischem Schnee.
Er ist die Sonne in goldener Pracht.
Er ist der Glanz der Sterne bei Nacht.
Wenn du in der Stille des Morgens erwachst,
Er ist der Vögel ziehende Schar,
die kreisend den Himmel durcheilt.”
Xiao crossed his arms and stared.
“I don’t speak Old Mondstadter.”
Venti chuckled. “Sorry, that’s the original language. I will give you an approximate translation.”
Once he knew the meaning, it was quite a lovely poem. The sort of wisdom you’d expect from Venti, and a more refined opinion to his own about his gone friends and family still being everywhere despite of their fate, and how they shouldn’t be mourned but celebrated.
They both knew it was unfair, those deaths. And sacrifices had to be made for their nations to survive and blossom. And yet it still hurt, and it still made them wonder why they didn’t die as well. But life moved on, and they both had a duty to their land and people.
Barbatos and him were quite different but, at their core, they had a deep understanding and respect of each other’s beliefs. It hadn’t been until recently and Xiao’s meetings with the Traveler, however, that he truly understood the value of humanity, of freedom, of enjoying everyday. Something that Barbatos’ wise soul had grasped thousands of years before but Xiao was barely flying low in those wind currents, like a young fledgling learning.
Xiao let Venti’s thoughts wander in silence, with only the waterfall and the crickets as noise until he was ready to come back.
“I’m starving,” he finally said. “Let’s go to Wangshu Inn and grab some of that almond tofu of yours? Maybe the manager has some dandelion wine as well.”
Xiao doubted Venti, an anemo elemental, could feel or die of hunger but that didn’t matter.
“Okay, that sounds good. Go ahead, I’ll leave my poem at the altar with some incense sticks and I’ll catch up with you there.”
“Oh? Yakshas have a temple now? Is that what that house below is? That probably wasn’t there before my last nap 500 years ago.”
“It’s new. It’s for one in particular but… I guess this will do? We don’t have graves.”
“I see. I’ll see you there then!” Venti leaned and kissed Xiao’s cheek in Mondstadt fashion before dissolving in feathers made of wind. The adeptus sighed and jumped downhill.
When he arrived to the Inn, Venti was sitting at the wooden balcony floor with a dejected face.
“They closed the kitchen hours ago,” he shrugged. “It’s past midnight.”
“Yes, Yanxiao must be sleeping right now and we shouldn’t disturb him,” Xiao replied.
“Mrs. Goldet sent me off with some apples and cider after I stared at her and said ‘please? please please please?’ We can share.”
Xiao accepted and tried not to wonder if that exchange really happened or if Venti just sneaked into the kitchen and grabbed his favorite fruit and bottles from the pantry. Both possibilities were plausible. Venti’s cute puppy eyes had unfathomable powers and he had fallen victim to those before, more than once.
They ate and drank merrily. The marsh was quite peaceful that evening and Venti could still help if any emergency happened, so Xiao was able to relax and even drink a couple of glasses.
“I’m still surprised you were so good at poetry!” Venti said, after emptying the second bottle. “You say you’ve only seen us and you picked it up after that? You might be a natural, my bosom friend.”
“I wouldn’t say it was a first time witnessing such a gathering…” Xiao pondered. “Indarias had dragged me to go to a couple of Cloud Retainer’s dinner parties with her and Bonanus. Although more than composing poems it was songs, it’s in essence a similar thing.”
“Parties with ad-lib music? That sounds like a jolly good time of my liking. Like we say in Mondstadt, that butters my biscuit.”
“You would have enjoyed it, yes. Guizhong, Streetward Rambler, and you together would have been quite the spectacle.”
“Trueeee, such a pity. Wait, Indarias was your pyro sister, correct?”
“Yes. Why?”
“Nothing. I think I understand why you have a hard time saying no to Miss Hu Tao,” Venti teased.
“…What does that have to do with anything?” Xiao stumbled, flustered. “I listen to her because she’s persistent, and she’s Rex— Zhongli’s superior thus I don’t want to offend her too much.”
“Whatever you say. I just think you’re weak to the headstrong exuberance of pyro girls~”
Xiao opened and closed his mouth.
“Speaking of pity, while I understand and respect that you can’t participate in our little get-together, now I wonder how well you would’ve done if you tried to do a couplet with us. I think you would do great, with your potential.”
“I won’t become a poet just because I wrote one poem.”
“Absolutely. It’s just silly old me wondering.”
“Good,” Xiao crossed his arms again.
“It’s too fun for you anyway,” said Venti, with a mocking tone and slightly sloshed words. He shook a hand in the air. “We can’t have the illuminated Conqueror of Demons having a nice time.”
“…”
Xiao could see Venti’s ‘machinations’ clearly. Just like the Traveler or Hu Tao, he also had a way to make Xiao change his mind about mundane things that in previous times he would have considered inconsequential. Unfortunately for him, it had started to work. Maybe it was the flood of feelings after he opened the dam with that poem. Maybe it was the alcohol. Maybe it was those charming green eyes that glimmered as he looked as Xiao with a significant glance, that beautiful porcelain face and blue-green braids framing them in a comforting sight.
“Hypothetically speaking…”
“Huh?”
“Hypothetically speaking, if I tried my hand at couplets, I don’t think I could do the first verse. I don’t know where to start.”
It was true. The entire idea of him starting the poem made him anxious.
“It’s alright,” Venti nodded. “Not everyone did the opening. Some of our participants would only reply to another one, and they still did well and had fun. You could wait for the host or a fellow participant. Hypothetically speaking, of course.”
“I’d prefer that. Hypothetically speaking.”
“Hypothetically speaking, to incentive a new talent, I could offer you a reward if you’re able to come up with a followup.”
Xiao felt butterflies in his stomach.
“…What kind of reward?
Venti took a bite off his red apple. Xiao found himself staring at Venti’s pink lips and quickly looked away.
“Dunno,” he heard his voice. “You don’t need Mora and I don’t have much anyway. I could offer advanced poetry lessons if you were interested. Or a song on the flute… ah, but I was already planning to play for you after we finished supper. Or maybe some displays of affection like a kiss?”
The butterflies in his stomach sank. He could feel his face flustered. Quickly, in order to do something, he rushed to empty his cup and fill it again. He could feel it go to his head.
They stayed there on the wooden floor for some minutes, refreshed by the autumn breeze. Venti had rested his head on Xiao’s thigh, still eating his apples in a contemplative state that, Xiao had seen it on an adeptus, was akin to meditation.
“I’ve got it!” he finally said, eyes on Xiao’s face with the brightest beam on his face. “The hypothetical couplet I’d give you if you were interested.”
“Let’s hear it then,” Xiao said emboldened by the cider.
“I’ve decided to go with something relevant and familiar, so it’s easier for hypothetical you.”
“Fine. Just use the common tongue and not Old Mondstadt language.”
Venti laughed, a chime in the night.
“Sitting high on the rooftops over the gingko tree
We meet again once more
Joined hearts burdened in sadness
In silence under the moonlight.
“Is it too hard?” Venti asked. “I can come up with another one.”
“No. It’s sufficiently challenging,” Xiao said. He was moved that Venti had composed a poem for the two of them, and didn’t want it to be changed. “Can you repeat it one or two more times, please?”
“Of course! Better yet, want me to write it down?”
He summoned paper and brush with adeptal arts for Venti to scribble with a beautiful handwriting that made Xiao feel a bit inadequate to try to be his equal.
Xiao started thinking about his and Barbatos’s relationship. They had met several times through their long lives, each time leaving him want for more of his light. But it all traced down to that fateful encounter where he had saved his life. Perhaps that couplet could paint a somehow romanticized tale of how the gratitude and reverence had turned into something hard to describe, yet more casual and affectionate.
Examining the original poem, coming up and writing his answers, it surely wasn’t easy. He repeated the verses several times in his head so he wouldn’t mess it up when putting them down in ink. When he was ready, he cleared his throat.
“Ahem!”
Venti looked up from his resting place on his leg. Xiao took a big breath.
“Drowning low in the marsh waters where glaze lilies grew
We had met for the first time
Lone mind cleansed from hope
Melody echoes by the morning sun.”
Venti’s semblance lit up with excitement and fondness. It took Xiao’s breath away. The effort had been worth it because it allowed him to see that lovely face.
“You got it perfectly!” he chirped. “The complementary contrast is perfect and delightful. Oh, I’m so glad!!”
“Ah.”
“You really surpassed my expectations twice tonight. Now, about that reward…”
“N-no, there’s no need!” Xiao raised his hands. “I didn’t… for that…”
Venti laughed heartily. “Don’t be silly, Xiao! I didn’t offer those things to coax you. I’m not Hu Tao with her coupons and promotions.” Good, since in Xiao’s opinion, those were more than strange even for mortal standards. “Perhaps I just wanted an excuse to give you something special, in this night full of loneliness.”
Adepti don’t need to breathe, so Xiao suddenly forgetting how to do that wasn’t a big deal.
“I don’t think there’s anything left to teach you in regards to poetry. You’ve mastered the basics quite easily already. The flute concert will be your lullaby before you go to bed, and like I said I’m doing that for free. So what’s left is…”
Venti cupped Xiao’s head with his hands.
“Unless you don’t want this.”
“I don’t think I deserve this,” Xiao whispered.
“You do.” Venti booped his nose with a finger. “I won’t be affected by your karma if we’re sparse, the winds will keep me safe. It’s up to you.”
He was doing it again. It was the old impulse, the old voice in his head. But he knew better, he knew it was okay to wish to live and to spend time with your loved ones. These moments, he had to seize the day and treasure them.
“I want it,” he said at last, still a bit dizzy from the booze and bracing himself as the archon moved closer and closer.
Xiao felt shivers down his spine when they met, like a breeze was crawling and dancing across his skin. In those rare moments where Lord Barbatos touched him, the pain and anguish of eons were gone in an instance, and a strong feeling of hope would dwell in his soul. Venti’s lips were so soft and tasted of apples. Xiao felt intoxicated by his scent and his anemo energy and his tongue.
Tentatively, he placed his gloved hands on Venti’s waist. There was no averse reaction. Moreover, Venti rearranged himself so he’d sit on Xiao’s lap and make the kiss easier, never removing his hands from Xiao’s cheeks. In one of the times they separated, before joining again, Xiao tilted his head slightly so he was able to give the smallest peck to Venti’s palm in reverence.
When Venti let him go, still his legs clamping Xiao’s, he just looked into those golden eyes with an adoring smile, and he recited again.
“Sitting high on the rooftops over the gingko tree
We meet again once more
Joined hearts burdened in sadness
In silence under the moonlight.“Drowning low in the marsh waters where glaze lilies grew
We had met for the first time
Lone mind cleansed from hope
Melody echoes by the morning sun.
“Did I memorize it right?”
Xiao nodded. It didn’t surprise him that Venti was able to do that with only hearing it once. “May I ask for something selfish?”
“You may.” Venti leaned to give him a shallow kiss on the lips, but not for that less passionate.
“Don’t share that poem with Director Hu for her book. Can it be only for the two of us?”
“Very well, then it’s to us, from us, and for us only. Not like I’d share it with her anyway, this poem and the one for your siblings aren’t part of the festival.”
“I want to show the first poem to Traveler too. But this…”
“Of course, my sweet warrior. I won’t tell it to a single soul, not even as an anonymous work.”
Xiao nodded, his eyebrows furrowed. “Thanks.”
“Ehe. We should compose verses again sometimes. Did you have fun?”
“Writing the poem or kissing you?”
“Yes,” Venti winked. “I think you really enjoyed it, alright.”
“I… Yes, I feel much better now.”
“Me too. The effect of my kiss should give you hope worth for a few months, I reckon. So, should I play the dizi for you like I promised or do you want a last kiss?”
“You’re going to do both things anyway, why bother asking?”
“The illusion of freedom.”
On that quiet night, the only sound heard on the terrace of the inn was a mysterious flute playing on a secret rendezvous.