Chapter Text
The 2023 season had finally come to an end. It had been very painful, especially for Charles. He knew he put all he could into making the most points possible, but it was only possible with how the car had been performing and the team’s poor strategies. He beated himself from time to time for he thought that with more aggressiveness and less mistakes he could’ve done much better, but he also knew how unlucky he had been. So unlucky to the point of thinking of going to Lourdes to pray. Of course he hadn’t done it, but the reactions from the fans, making memes and jokes about it, took off a bit of weight from his shoulders and he truly appreciated all of the comments and kind words. Even Ryanair made him a customised ticket for him to fly there!
But nevertheless, the season was finally over, and he could rest a bit from the adrenaline and stress of Formula 1. He loves his job, but he also needs a break from it from time to time, especially since it has been long since his last win and his morale was going down. He was happy to race for Ferrari, continuing Jules’ legacy and making his father’s dream, but it was already 4 years and he felt like he was so far away from achieving the dream of winning WDC with Ferrari. His contract is due 2024 so he has to do everything he can so that he can win the championship and assure himself a seat in the team. He still had faith in Ferrari. Although, it doesn't matter how much he loves the tifosi and the whole vibe of the Scuderia, it was becoming a little much for his own happiness. He really needed that win.
Don't let yourself get too distracted by this. You can still achieve something and you know it.
He needed to concentrate on winning the WDC, although it could be really difficult, given that the final boss to surpass, points wise, is Max Verstappen. Not that he didn’t think that he is better than him, but he had doubts he could actually surpass him with the car Ferrari will give him. He has faith in his team, but the events of the last year made it falter.
It’s not my job to make a good car. I just have to have faith in the engineers and the whole team.
Maybe that’s why he looked so much forward to the car testing. He couldn’t wait to answer a question weighing on his heart, whether the car is good enough to even think about winning a championship.
Ugh. I have to stop looking forward to the future so much. I need to concentrate on the present. The place is here. The time is now.
All considered, it wasn’t a bad thought. He was there, in Maranello, right after the end of the season, walking into the establishment to finish the last formalities before the break. He was just outside, hands in the pockets of his big jacket. It was kinda cold already, but he likes that kind of cold that makes your face burn and makes your skin feel the cold air grace it. That cold that doesn’t penetrate your bones, but just caresses you. The kind of cold that makes you feel alive. Not to talk about the little vapour clouds your breath forms in the cold air. He always loved them, even as a kid, it was his favourite game to play with his brothers and Jules as well. So simple yet so funny to play.
He entered the building and got over with his day.
❇
He didn’t really know what to do during the break. Taking a break of course. For sure he was going to spend Christmas with his family, then maybe New Year with his friends and then go somewhere to relax. He knew he also had to exercise and keep his body fit so that he would have been in the best shape to start the season. For sure he wanted to go on the snow. He was the kind of guy who liked to spend his vacation in places which followed the season’s mood. Cold places in winter and hot ones during summer.
So, first stage of his winter vacation: Monaco.
He loves going back to his country. It brings him so many memories, and the people living there are costumed into meeting him, so he could say he lives an almost normal everyday life there. Of course his car stands out for being personalised, but he liked it a lot so he drives it around proudly. He had seen Tweets about him not being able to properly park his car, and everytime someone takes a pic of it it’s parked in the wrong places and positions. To him it’s actually quite funny, since he’s aware of his incapacity to park and the analogy of him being a F1 driver and thus someone who should know how to park. He giggles at himself.
He truly loves tifosi. Almost too much he’s afraid to disappoint them. He doesn’t really care about disappointing himself, because he knows he already did that multiple times now. He’s the one who makes it the hardest on himself. Of course he doesn’t show it to anyone apart from his psychologist, he still has to maintain his public image. He had told some friends, like Pierre, or Andrea, or even his brothers, but he kinda misses the need to tell it to someone who truly understands all of his worries.
Nobody knows you better than yourself, huh? Guess I’ll count on my company for now.
Not that he doesn’t cherish the relationship he has with the people he loves, but he can’t say he has truly found that love that you can interpret as romantic and fulfilling. He has had his fair share of girlfriends, but never felt completely satisfied. He felt happy with them all and he knew he loved them, but he was aware of the fact that it wasn’t gonna last.
So he took a break. He is officially single now. Big news, considering he never really took a break that long from being in a relationship. It doesn’t feel that bad. This way, he can concentrate on himself, become a better person and, who knows, maybe win the WDC next year.
It was the middle of December, and so the time he would spend with his family. The time he will use to train and help decorate, buy gifts and do gaming sessions on Twitch. As he crossed the door of the family house, he was overwhelmed by the scent of fresh baked cookies.
“
Maman
! I’m home.”
“Oh,
salut
Cher. This year you’re back earlier.” She said, while hugging him tightly.
“Yes, I figured I’d come help a bit with the Christmas preparations. I smell some good stuff. You’re making biscuits?”
“
Oui
, dear. You wanna taste some? I just finished the first batch.” She says with a smile.
Charles picked a tree shaped one.
“
Mhh
, it tastes so good.”
“Thanks dear.” She turned her head to the side, happy with the compliment.
Charles picked another, this time a star shaped one.
“Why are you making so many of them?” he asked, his mouth half full.
“Don’t talk while eating. And I’m making so many so I can give them to my friends. But not now, this is just for us. I wanted to try this new recipe and I wanted to make sure that it tasted good before giving it around.”
“Mhh, trust me, it’s really really good.” He finished eating. “Need help with anything?”
“No dear, put your bags in your room. You’ll be staying here for a bit,
non
?”
“Yes, up until the 27th. Then I plan to go skiing with my friends on the Alps.”
“Sounds funny. Be careful though.” She said, in an apprehensive tone.
“I will, thanks
maman
.”
Charles picked up his bags, then he turned to face his mom again.
“Do you perhaps know when Arthur and Lorenzo will be back?”
“Mhh, they didn’t tell me, but probably in a few days.”
“Then it’s just you and me until then.”
He grinned, and Pascale smiled at him back.
Charles fixed all of his bags into his room. It felt good to be back in that house. He liked his apartment in Monaco, just a few blocks from there, but this house brings him back memories of the good and the struggling times. But all cherished times, with his family, with Jules. He would be proud of him, more than he is of himself.
Maybe it would be easier with him around. Maybe he would know what to say.
Charles needed to think of something else, to not cry. He saw his bed, undone.
“
Maman
? Where are the bedsheets?” he screamed. Fortunately she heard him and replied back.
“They’re in the brown wardrobe in my room!”
“ Merci .”
Charles carefully went into the forbidden room. He remembers when he was little and he considered that place as an inaccessible room. Now, as grown as he is, it just brings nostalgic memories. Nothing has changed, and maybe it’s better this way. He likes to keep memories of his past, and it’s good that his mother doesn’t want to change the house either.
He sighed and took the bedsheets, brought them back to his room and made the bed. Then washed his hands so that he could help his mom.
He loved helping her in the kitchen. It was that kind of place that brought the most a sense of home to him.
Out of his brothers, he’s definitely the most skilled in the kitchen. He helped his mother a lot during the years, it was a lot less when his career took over, but everytime he could he would always be there. Like now.
“Oh Cher, I’ve just put the second batch in the oven.”
“I could help you with dinner.” He offered, with a smile on his face.
“Don’t bother, you just rest. The trip must have been tiring.”
Charles chuckled.
“You know I love to cook with you. Don’t worry, I’m not tired at all.”
“Mhh, then
you
decide what to make for tonight’s dinner.”
“What about parmigiana? It’s been too long since I’ve eaten a decent one.”
“You’re lucky, I just bought eggplants this morning.”
Charles grinned, as if he was waiting for her to say something like that.
“I might have peeked into the fridge before telling you.” he said with a mischievous grin.
“You’re the same cunning boy as always.” She ruffled his hair.
“Good then, help me put these biscuits to cool down in the living room, we can’t work with so little space.”
“ Oui Mademoiselle !”
She smiled watching Charles happily picking up the chopping board and trotting to the living room to place it on the tea table. He loved how his face lit up in such moments, showing his gorgeous dimples that beautifully framed his face.
“Let’s get going! Now we can really start.”
They prepared everything, although Pascale figured she’d leave Charles the lead in the main preparation, since she knew he enjoyed these times together so much. They spent a very pleasant dinner together, talking about everything they had to catch on about each other, about their job, their free time or some gossip that went around.
“Once, after the race in Spain, Dan took off his helmet and his hair looked so bad, I’m telling you. You remember how he has curly hair?”
She nodded. “
Oui
.”
“Well, that day it was so hot, his hair all flatted out and since he took the balaclava very quickly, it all went forward. It was hilarious.”
“
Oh mon Dieu
.” She covered her mouth with her hands, making it obvious that she was finding it very funny. “I wish I could have seen him.”
“Please, he had his hair on his eyes from how flat it was.”
They both laughed so much that Charles felt tears coming out of his eyes.
“Now that you tell me, something similar happened at the salon as well.”
“Don’t tell me, was it Juliette?”
“Yes! You know how she has the straightest hair I’ve ever seen but she insists on having it curly?”
“
Oui
! She looks good with straight hair as well to be honest.”
“Well, she was a week late on schedule, so her perm was almost completely undone, leaving the hair completely straight near the base and curly on the tips. But the funny part is that she came into the salon in a rush, almost screaming her lungs out.”
Charles almost spit his water and snorted.
“It’s hilarious only from the way you’re telling me!”
“But wait,” she interrupted him. “since I was doing another lady at that moment, she had to wait in the waiting room. She sat there with her feet nervously tapping the floor and glancing at me all the time.”
“I bet she wasn’t even in a rush.”
"That’s right! It was hilarious.” She giggled at the thought.
Charles was happy to see her enjoying herself.
He was loving everything of that moment with his
maman
. Now it really felt like home. The good food. The loving company. That feeling of home he missed for a year was finally back. He knew he could finally rest.
There’s no place like home.