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Valentine's Day falling during the cold, dreary month of February was either the most poetic irony or the most appropriate metaphor imaginable, depending on where exactly love’s alluring yet oftentimes cruel melody had led you. Sanji, at whom the chilly night wind whipped against as he softly blew a puff of cigarette smoke out of the window into the evening streets, couldn't help but agree with both.
It was truly a shame that a show as wonderful and extravagant as true love had to take place on such an ill fitting stage, he had always thought. That happy couples all across the land were deprived of the love of mother nature herself to accompany their own. Then again, that was also the beauty of it. Despite the coldest, most rigid resistance, the dreams and desires of the human heart would, as it always did, persist.
But there was no denying that his own heart felt a kinship with the unforgiving weather.
With no date of his own for tonight, Sanji sat on his sofa with his cigarette in his hand in the empty room around him. A room with just enough space for both his mind and heart to map out such a complex web of emotions that would require the most skilled navigator to traverse safely.
Was it loneliness that filled his heart? Yes, that was definitely a factor. This was hardly the first time he had been alone on Valentine's, but it admittedly was the first in a few years, having broken up with his ex-girlfriend several months ago now. He had grown so accustomed to conducting a grand symphony of affection, passion and devotion at this time of year that the sudden sound of silence had become quite haunting, the interval that had overrun. And yet…it wasn't alone. There was something else eating away at him, and taking far bigger bites.
Was it jealousy? Not…really? Whilst he would certainly enjoy the ability to join these couples in their heartfelt excursions, and he certainly had felt envious of other couples in his younger years, he had also come to find the beauty in just…observing love in all its forms. Once he had truly experienced it for himself, the idea of his heart radiating anything but warmth at the sight of someone, anyone, else getting to share in that joy was something you couldn't hope to bribe, blackmail or even torture him into taking away from them.
No, there was something else, another far more foreboding feeling that tormented him.
Regret.
Regret was not a cage that bound Sanji's heart often. Yes, there were large chunks of his life he would certainly rather forget about, but he had learned long ago to throw off the shackles of shame and guilt that had bound him for a lot of his childhood. There was no point fretting so much about something that was ultimately completely out of his control.
But that only spoke volumes as to what she managed to do to him.
She was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Those same words seemed to tumble out of his mouth at nearly every woman that he met, but he had known from the moment he had laid eyes on this woman that she was the most beautiful he would ever see. He couldn’t even recall the last time he had said that to anyone that wasn't her, as if the words themselves refused their service for anyone else, so offended at the thought of a single other lady receiving that all coveted praise. If there was anyone he could have possibly picked to be his Valentine, it was her.
And he hadn't.
That was the real problem. It had been within his control. It was his inaction to fix the wear and tear in the bridge between their hearts that had caused it to collapse.
Why? That one single word had replayed in his mind all day. Why had he said nothing? Why had he let her get away?
He saw her almost every day. She was as close to him as any of his greatest friends. He had had every opportunity to ask her to be his. But he had refused.
Why?
Perhaps it was fear. As much as he tried to pretend it wasn't there, that part of him that thought he was nothing but unworthy lay within him, leaving ugly bites on his soul as his better judgment repeatedly fought to swat it away. The fear of what he believed to be almost certain rejection had certainly made itself known, whispering from the depths of the abyss how beyond him a goddess like her truly was.
Or perhaps it was shame. It was the woman who was traditionally supposed to approach the man after all. And though nothing was stopping him from acting on his desires of his own accord, the rough chains of his own pride and stubbornness had bound him. The thought that, if she hadn't approached him of her own accord, acted on the burning feelings within her heart, they must never have been there to begin with. This, of course, only led him to scathe himself at being his own worst enemy. A vicious circle of self depreciation.
Whatever it was, it had gotten the better of him, and now here he sat, with no one's company but his own. They said it was the things you didn't do that you regretted, and the lament of inaction had Sanji in a state of silent madness.
Like a gunshot to an empty field, he heard the rapping of the knocker against his front door. Sanji's head turned immediately, the clouds of his mind parting as it turned to the prospective visitor waiting outside. Try as he might to search for one, he couldn’t think of a single person within reason that would call at this hour. He closed the window, dipped his cigarette in the ashtray before discarding it, and slowly made his way to the door. The knock had sufficiently cleared his thoughts that he was able to mentally prepare himself to potentially confront a hostile intruder. He stretched out to the door handle, lightly holding it for a moment, before pulling it open carefully.
And there she stood.
As if his thoughts had manifested her into his doorway, she was here. She wore a black, grey and white checkered winter coat atop a black dress that fell to her thighs and hugged her body. A pair of black boots stretched up her legs and rested at her knees, leaving about half her thighs visible. A white beret sat atop her head, a matching scarf wrapping around her neck. Her long red hair fell like curtains of gently lapping flames down either side of her front. Her deep brown eyes met his, and her lips curled into a soft smile.
“Nami…” he breathed, both from disbelief, and from total awe of her unmatched beauty. “What are you doing here?” The corners of Nami's mouth twitched a little further up, adding a faint, shy cheekiness to her smile.
“Nice to see you too,” she replied, with just a hint of her usual sass. It was only then Sanji looked away from her face and towards her stomach, which she was holding a small box of chocolates against. “I came to spend the evening…with my Valentine. I mean…” She gently drummed her fingers against the box, looking down at it, then back to him. The small smile on her face faded, her lip quivering ever so slightly. “If he'll have me.”
Of all the countless memories of her that he had stored away, that replayed in his head more times a day than he could hope to count, Sanji couldn’t recall a single one where Nami had been this…bashful. He gazed into her eyes…and what he found staring back at him filled him with surprise. In an instant, it made sense. Her face. The fidgeting. Even the time that she had chosen to show up, with just a few hours of the day left to go.
At that moment, the both of them knew exactly what the other was thinking and feeling.
“Nami…” Sanji stepped out into the doorway and gently laid his hand on the chocolate box she pressed to her torso. As it lay there, his index finger stretched out and lightly brushed her pinky, the most gentle of caresses, but with all the electric energy to make a world of difference. He looked up and their eyes met again. Their magnetic connection pulled her forward until she was resting gently against him, her head laying on his shoulder as he rested his chin atop her beret.
And their arms simultaneously curled around the other, pulling them into a close embrace. The storms of their minds clearing, the constrictions of their hearts loosening, as the two of them stood there, basking in the warm relief that could only come from…
Each other.