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Medkit would have finally gone outside today.
He’d been planning to just cook a Valentine's meal for himself, a date for one, (Which just sounded like a depressing proposal in retrospect) but he was dry on ingredients. Of course, he would have just gone out to the grocery store a few blocks down from his apartment but it sounded more of a chore considering the lines are longer on holidays nor did he want to endlessly walk past all of the touchy demons making out in the streets.
As cheesy as they were, it also slightly stung knowing he’d never find himself acting smitten with another demon, not even just on Valentine’s Day.
He’d just go order himself another shitty meal again, he supposed.
In addition, the day before, Sword had invited him to go out to a higher-end restaurant with him and Rocket but Medkit was too apprehensive to be spotted being a third-wheel again in public. He did not want to put up with the teasing remarks from the other Phighters, he still hadn’t figured out how information like that even spreads so quickly. Rocket and Sword probably would be better off with eachothers company anyway.
Medkit sighed as he leaned back onto his couch, tossing his cigarette into the ashtray. He scrolled on his phone absent-mindedly, what restaurants would even deliver today? Every restaurant was probably swamped with couples, deliveries would probably take an hour to stop by. And every place is practically understaffed on top of that.
Forget that, maybe a pasta dish would do the trick. He didn’t have any particular cravings anyway.
Medkit’s apartment was near a district that housed a lot of restaurants, any genre food was basically a few clicks of a website away. For pasta, he always just went to this one restaurant and ordered the same category of dishes, either rigatoni, zitoni, or fusilli. Confirming his order, he made sure to double-check that he’d chosen the non-spicy option. He’d probably be considered a swine for wanting non-spicy sausage and sauce on his zitoni pasta but he would rather enjoy his food instead of having his mouth burst into flames. Especially , considering he was already in a sour mood on a supposedly joyous holiday.
He input his credit card information into the checkout page and sent the order over.
Well, now it was time to wait whatever ungodly amount of time it would take.
Actually, the site had a completion estimate displayed on the screen…
….
ONE AND A HALF HOURS?!
Welp, guess he’ll go kill himself instead.
He dropped his phone onto his coffee table, he’d probably just die from the boredom instead.
If only everyone weren’t busy already… They’re either out on dates or hanging out with friends. Maybe going out with Rocket and Sword would have fared better, but it was too late to consider any of that.
And then right on cue, Medkit heard two firm pounds on his door.
How the hell…
Forget it, company is company… unless it’s Subspace or a Biograft or Boombox or Banhammer… Just get up and answer the door already, it was evident who would want to come knocking on his door anyway.
He just expected her to be, well, busy too.
Medkit flipped open the door, just to see a slightly shorter figure standing before him with a gleeful look on her face.
“You didn’t call in, Clock,” Medkit commented dryly.
“That’s how surprise visits work, dipshit!” Clockwork snickered.
She was haphazardly carrying a couple of flat boxes among other things in her arms, including a paper cup with a black coffee lid. He was eyeing it. There was something on the ground at her feet but he couldn’t see it clearly, some sort of pot.
He ushered her into the apartment before some random came strutting in the halls, locking the door behind herself, “I would’ve thought Banhammer asked you out of something,” he jested.
“No, if he did that then I would’ve had to clean up another body on Valentine’s Day…”
She dropped the things in her arms onto the coffee table in his living room, “And what are you insinuating?! You’re vile!!”
“Aren’t you insinuating you were killing people today? ”
She laughed, “Maybe I am!”
“Then the fact you stopped by clean is a miracle…”
“It was in the afternoon anyway! It’s really simple to lure drunk couples into dark alleyways.”
“But aren’t the streets crowded? You would’ve been caught by now…”
“Then kill all of the witnesses!”
“Now you’re just being unreasonable.”
“I know, I’m kidding. I’m just sneaky like that!” she giggled, before handing him the lukewarm cup, “Bought you this, by the way. Totally didn’t spike it with every drug known to man though!”
Medkit immediately took a sip like she hadn’t just said that, “I hope you did…”
Dark coffee. A bit cold but it tasted great regardless. The cup had the logo for a coffee shop further downtown, he couldn’t remember the name off the top of his head but they served quite pricey coffee.
“How did you even afford this?” Medkit asked, sipping again.
“Credit card from some dead guy, obviously.”
“...Of course,” he sighed, before glancing at the things on the table.
She looked at them too, “Oh yeah, I bought some other stuff I thought you might’ve liked or something. Y’know, to compensate for the -25 gifts you receive every year?”
Medkit sat on the couch, taking the smaller, heart-shaped of the two boxes. It had the obnoxious red of Valentine's Day with a golden ribbon and foiled lettering.
“I’m not a chocolate person,” Medkit mumbled.
“It’s not the stupidly sweet milk chocolates, just dark,” she said, snatching the box from his hands.
She sloppily untied the ribbon, setting it on the table as she threw off the cardboard lid. She took a small chocolate and forced it into his mouth before he could react. He chewed on it apprehensively, certainly bitter with a tinge of fruitiness, like raspberry sauce. Pretty good.
“Was that necessary?” Medkit questioned in between chews.
“You wouldn’t have tried it otherwise!”
“Fair.”
She held a finger up in realization, “Wait a minute.”
She turned around and left.
Medkit reached for the other, square box. It was also red with black accenting and had cursive lettering written in silver.
A… chess set? And a wooden one.
He hadn’t played since… since he was in Blackrock… That was a while ago.
He really hadn’t gotten around buying a new one. Well, that was one memory he missed from back then. One he sincerely missed.
Clockwork quickly returned, cupping a marble pot in her hand. It had a small purplish-green succulent in the soil.
She noticed that he was still holding the box, “Oh, I remembered you talking about playing chess again last week. So I bought you one.”
He was very evidently flustered, “...T-Thanks.”
She giggled, “What? We could play if you want.”
“It… depends, do you know how to play? I’m not looking to tutor somebody.”
“I know the rules, I can just compute moves.”
His brows furrowed, “So, I’m going to be playing against a bot.”
“HEY! Don’t describe it as that!!” she complained.
“You described it as ‘computing’.”
“Whatever! Let’s just do it!” she commanded, “And if I’m such a bot to you then I’ll easily kick your ass.”
He opened the box and began rummaging for the board, “What are you acting so sensational about this for?”
She shrugged.
“I’ll sit on the floor so you don’t have to use a chair…”
The coffee table he’d been laying all of the pieces on was low to the floor so they could reach up from the ground. Clockwork stationed herself on one end of the table and Medkit was on the other.
“I wasn’t originally planning to buy the set. I just saw it while I was at Thieves’ Den at a pawn shop a few hours ago, I was visiting that plant shop Vinestaff opened last month,” she explained, glancing at the potted plant on the side of the table, “She did not want me there though, she still thinks I’m wrecking her plants.”
“Uh huh…” Medkit mumbled thoughtlessly as he meticulously arranged the pieces.
“Oh, that poor guy is probably broke now, this thing was 60k, 70k bux or something absurd like that.”
“Hand-carved wooden sets can go for a lot,” Medkit said, inspecting the painted, black knight. It certainly had the chisels of a hand-carved craftsmanship.
Suddenly, Medkit’s phone buzzed, still face-down on the table. He picked it up and noticed a notification on his home screen, his order was already downstairs. It’d only been, maybe, around 45 minutes? Perhaps they weren’t as overcrowded as he’d thought they were.
“Is there something wrong?”
“I ordered food. Stay here.”
He quickly left, leaving the front door open a crack behind himself.
And then before he knew it, he’d gone back and forth on the elevator, paper bag of scolding hot food in hand. The concierge wasn’t in today, she’d probably gone out like everyone else was doing.
He left the contents on the coffee table to cool and sat back down. The entire chessboard was already set up, courteously finished by Clockwork with a self-satisfied look. Medkit took another large sip of his coffee and another bite of chocolate from the box.
Clockwork was staring at him, her face in her hands like the two of them were at a candlelit dinner.
“Don’t look at me like that.”
“Can we just get to you getting your ego flattened into a pancake?”
“You’re one to talk. But okay.”
Medkit was sitting on the black side of the chessboard while Clockwork was on the white side.
He took another sip of his drink as Clockwork moved a pawn to c4…
Knight to f6.
She nudged a knight to f3.
Pawn to c5.
She moved to a pawn as well to g3.
Pawn to g6.
……
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Clockwork’s face was actually knitted with concentration now. So was his.
The match was indeed, pretty close. Medkit might as well have been playing with a bot because she was playing a lot of very robotic plays. Too bad she was at two left. Her king was cornered by his queen. And she only had a singular pawn left.
Speaking of her pawn… pawn to e5 and now it's gone.
Now, she actually looked concerned as if losing everything else didn’t make her stressed…
“You play like a fucking bot too!!” Clockwork lamented.
“Focus.”
Based on her moves, she was just attempting to preserve her king.
“Goddammit, I made a move error somewhere,” she muttered.
“....”
He moved his pawn up one, except that pawn was at the edge of the board. It was a queen now, she was surrounded by two queens.
“Checkmate.”
“Fuck off!” she groaned, “Rematch. Now.”
“Sure.”
------------
There she was, desperately attempting to preserve her king again. She’d been back to trash talking to him until now. She had more of her pieces this time but she was getting cornered by his own.
She moved her king to g1.
Rook to d5, there goes her other knight. She pushed her own rook to it and took his rook down. His bishop was at one corner near her rook, he promptly struck it down. Confused, she moved her king to f2.
Queen to b2. Her king was in sight again.
“Lay off me!” she complained, moving her king to e1.
Queen to c1, “No.”
She moved her king away again to f2.
He kept pursuing the king, queen to d2. She moved her king up to f1.
Queen to d3. Cornered once more. She moved back to f2.
This approach wasn’t going to work.
Queen to a6. Claiming her last rook, she moved her queen to a6, taking one of his pawns. He moved his queen down to a7, her king. Panicking, she moved it over to e2. Queen to d4. She moved her king up again to e1.
“You’re stalling,” he commented, “And you stopped trash talking.”
“What am I supposed to do?!”
Bishop to c6.
She pushed her queen up to e2.
And then a few minutes later, she was only up to her king and queen. They were still going back and forth. She was still muttering to herself. At least she managed to get one of her queens on his king for a moment. He still had five of his pieces, two pawns, a king and a queen, and a bishop.
He got one of his pawns to the end of the board, now it was a queen.
They had another back and forth, Clockwork using her queen to block the way for his two queens. She was just preventing the inevitable, unfortunately. He sighed as he moved his queen to a7.
“Checkmate.”
“NO!” she cried out, clenching her fist as she slammed it against the table, the pieces on the board and table launched up, “DAMN YOU!!”
He rolled his eye, “I should probably eat now.”
He reached for his food.
“NOPE! One more match!” she declared, slapping his hand away.
“We’ve been at this for an hour.”
“I get so fucking close though, please!?”
“Dammit.”
------------
“Idiot! You take my bishop and I’m taking yours,” she mocked, “An eye for an eye!”
Once again, they were having another back and forth, attempting to each other’s kings. They both had a rook and their respective kings left. A lot of the match consisted of one claiming one’s piece and the other taking the same piece in return. Medkit was scratching his head slightly, unsure on how to proceed without any rooks.
Previously, his strategy was to trap with two queens but he could not apply that here.
Clockwork had the most relaxed expression but he could tell a vein was going to burst if he played any funny moves.
This match had gone on much longer than the other two, he just wanted to eat his cold pasta already…
His rook was on her king but she quickly moved her rook back to block the king.
Observing the board, he came to a disappointing conclusion.
He moved his rook to take hers and then her king took his rook. It was a tie.
She sharply inhaled right at that, she definitely did not like that. She shot up, picking up Medkit’s food, the plant, and his empty coffee cup, gently placing them on the floor. She still had that gleeful look on her face.
“YOU FUCKER!!” she shouted abruptly, flipping the empty board with the two remaining king pieces and empty coffee table over onto Medkit's legs.
“AGh-!” he yelped.
The table wasn’t exactly heavy enough to break his legs but it certainly hurt .
She stormed around the flipped table and picked up Medkit by the shoulders, shaking his legs free of the wooden table. She took a plastic fork from the paper bag.
“I’M GONNA STAB YOU IN THE NECK,” she berated, holding the prongs of the fork to his neck, “AND THEN I’M GONNA DUMP YOUR INTESTINES OUT THE WINDOW.
“Are you now? It was a draw,” he responded calmly.
Though she probably would’ve had a wilder response if she’d lost for a third time.
“WHY DID I EVEN COME HERE?!?!” she cried out in distress, tossing Medkit onto the couch.
He bounced up before flopping over, “You tell me…”
“EAT YOU STUPID FOOD ALREADY OR I’LL FEED YOU LIKE A TODDLER!”
“You’re throwing a tantrum like one.”
She flipped the coffee table upright again, enraged. She took the items she left on the floor and threw them on top.
“I’LL KILL YOU BEFORE BANHAMMER PUTS YOUR SORRY ASS IN JAIL…!” she cried out again.
Medkit let out another hefty sigh as she dropped down onto the floor in front of the couch. He took his food out the bag, it’d been two hours already since it arrived. Obviously, the zitoni was ice-cold now but it probably wouldn’t matter anyway. He still had fun, a nostalgia trip even if it was just composed of the two of them playing like machines with Clockwork breaking the silence with mockery and quips. He took the plastic takeout container and brought it into the kitchen. He dumped the pasta into a bowl, scooping out as much sauce as he could, before tossing it into the microwave.
He took it back out after a minute. It’d probably taste worse now this way but he could not be bothered to cook or order more food to compensate. Oddly, it smelled rather… peppery? It was likely seasoning or something. He took it back into the living room where Clockwork was still laying against the cushions.
“Sorry for making you wait for your food, enjoy that last meal!” she giggled ominously, handing him the plastic fork.
“Uh huh…” he responded, shoveling pasta into his mouth.
Immediately, his mouth began to tingle.
And then it began to sting.
And then it began to burn.
And then his mouth was on fire .
AND THEN HIS ENTIRE SOUL WAS ON FIRE.
“SHIT-!” he panted, fanning his scorching tongue.
They FUCKED his order up in the WORST WAY POSSIBLE. AND HE’D EATEN WAY TOO MUCH WITH THAT FIRST BITE…
Clockwork burst out laughing, “HAHAHAHA!!”
Medkit dropped the bowl onto the table and he bolted into the kitchen.
She cheered him on, “RUN, DUMBASS!”
He returned with an entire carton of milk in his sweaty hands, a sad, defeated look on his face as he sipped straight out of it. Clockwork had her claws over her face, snickering madly.
“I… would have rather…” he mumbled, taking another large gulp of milk, “...starved to death instead of that being… my last meal…”
She scooped another portion of pasta from the bowl and held it up to him, “Here comes the airplane, Meddy~!”
“I will kill us both if you dare make me eat that…”
She gave an extremely exaggerated, saddened face, “Why?! It’s called your ‘last meal’ for a reason! This is your execution!!”
“Absolutely not.”
Medkit sat on the floor next to her as she removed the cover on her mask and dumped some of the pasta inside. Medkit’s eye was still watery and his nose was still running from the spice.
“I guess I’m not eating tonight,” he shrugged. His mouth was still burning with the rage of a thousand suns.
She took another chocolate from the chocolate box, “Not even another chocolate?”
He sighed once again, as he let her pop it into his mouth, firmly biting down.
“Awww, Happy Valentine’s Day!” she gleefully exclaimed, jumping onto him with a hug.
He took another swig of milk as he patted her on the back, “Mhm…”